I dont know because my shit does'nt stink.

if its in a public bathroom I would either not say anything if they didnt and if they did say something I would tell them it was like that when I went in too.
but one time my friend plugged the toilet at my house and she just denied it so that might work too

I always say "Doctor told me don't hold back!"

I got run over by a steamroller once it made me look real fat. Deuce, is that mrs, or miss, dog?

If at home I laugh and say "don't go in there".

In public I try like a motherfucker not to get caught in such a situation.
But if it happened I would avoid eye contact and just scoot out of the bathroom.

Keep a straight face & nod or say hello...of course that's for those of us that might be for the shameful..for those of us that are shameless one tactic might be to smile & say "It's in my genes."

Most people would expect a public bathroom to have some level of stink. I have entered some bathrooms and wonderd why the wallpaper did not peel. I guess making or meeting a rancid odor is the chance we all take. Prepare for the worst, say nothing and take your best shot be it odormaker or odortaker.

Haha! Chuck, I like your last sentence a lot. Odortaker--good one! As in--'May I take your odor?' LOL!

this wing of the building is closed

Dookie, is that the same doctor who told your mom, "what a cute baby, mrs. dog." then realized he was holding up the wrong end??

I like to run out of the bathroom screaming, "Someone set up us the bomb!"

In a public setting, I avoid eye contact and just pretend I didn't see the next victim. If they make any vile comments about the stench I've left in my wake, I just give out an evil laugh that will echo amongst the porcelain walls.

If I'm at home or at a friend's house, I'll just tell them, "sucks to be you."

I would be proud and say I got
some powerfull stuff.

I don't say anything. I just let them walk into a solid wall of odor.

To either sex...."Dont be jealous!!"

I'm usually too busy laughing to say anything...

anyone who doesn't find poo funny isn't worth worrying about

First of all,,,,most everyone on this is very nice and fun. There are one or two people who create problems,,,and i wish theyd get run over by a steam roller.

As far as the question here.....generally i dont stink up bathrooms in public by design. I always seek out an out of the way john on a lower floor, or in the back of the house.

I do courtesy flushes religiously.

And i open windows. NO way im going to stink up somebody's john during a social function.

I spray perfume. I have only been in this situation once or twice, and I find that it's easier to say something to someone in my age demographic than to an older person. I couldn't tell Granny McDougal to "Watch the nosehairs". But, I could tell a teenager or someone my age "I sprayed some perfume in there, because otherwise, it would be bad."

My dad has told me he says "Breath deep, there's plenty for all" when he lets the Big One go in public pipes.

And, Dave can see our IP address? Wow. Sometimes I use anonymous names to post things for fun. I guess it's not anonymous to our fearless leader.

Funny!

I don't go out of my way to avoid eye contact; if it should happen, I just smile and say "Breathe through your mouth - works for me".

For a lycan, you have excedingly wonderful manners.

One guy I worked with used to look at you as he was coming out of the stall, with the oddest grin on his face, pat you in the back and say "watch out, dead animal in there!!" then burst into laughter.
Each and everytime...

Fudgepump--

Eww, so they can taste the stench? And know that molecules of your poo are in their mouth? Better to breathe through the nose, with its superior filtering ability and its receptors that crap out in 30 seconds, IMO.

After stinking up a bathroom I smile graciously at the pooper on deck and bid her a heartfelt "Enjoy." And hope she does, too. There are only 3 people in the world I wouldn't dare do this with: my aunt and grandma, who've never understood the concept of good-natured malice, and my only coworker who's of the right gender to catch my stink afterward. Them I'd probably give a sincere warning of the waiting disaster--passing the blame to an unspecified "somebody" of course.

if i'm heading to the restroom knowing i'm going to stink it up, i make a face as i'm walking in and say "god.. what died in here" so people think someone else stunk it up before i went in.

I usually put police tape around the stall, advising people to travel at their own risk. Normally a simple call to 911 will bring the proper people to evacuate the area and seal it off. By not taking the above steps, you actually could be sued by anyone using the shitter after you (refer to Surpreme Court case #1100.0195 of 9/15/01 Shit vs Stink).

T6000, I think you're giving the nose too much credit for filtering ability. Think about it; pollen grains cause misery for allergy sufferers, and stankiferous molecules are much smaller than pollen. Some particles or molecules transported in aerosol form would probably condense on nose hair and mucous membranes before being detected as stench, but the simple fact that a powerdump can make you gag proves the limits of filtration. As far as mouth vs. nose collection, that's a good point; maybe if my mouth ended up tasting like bog water, I'd opt for "grimace and bear it" nose breathing.

Turdmatic 6000, I would suggest that perhaps poo doesnt come in molecules because poo is not homogeneous and therefore must be made up of different molecules- I would be more worried about poo bacteria that might have escaped into the air...

I usually say "sorry about the porcelin" and proceed to wash up.

In the small company where I worked for ten years, the owner would always come into my office, gesture towards the bathroom, and say, "It's ready for you."

I try to avoid meeting other people in the bathroom when I need to poop (i.e. at work). I find a secluded bathroom, go in, and if I'm alone, I get busy. If someone else is there then I wait quietly in the stall until they leave. If someone comes in while I'm taking care of business, I wait until they go into a stall, then I finish up quickly and then leave fast, so they don't see me. I guess I am a "shameful" shitter. But I get so much enjoyment after I produce a big, stanky turd, if there's someone else who's come into the washroom & is ensconced in another stall... after I leave, I giggle to myself imagining them in there gagging on the fetid odor I've produced.

I don't say anything. There's not point. They will still see the shit and know what happened and they still have to deal with it no matter how sorry the leaver is.

I am a veteran at this sort of thing. If you want to get out of there alive with any shred of pride and dignity you must follow my directions, and you must practice my teachings. First things first, plan on making a substantial time investment. This is necessary due to the fact that no one..and I mean NO ONE can see you come out of that stall. Secondly, what I like to do is spread my feet wide and arch my legs forward to create the impression that I am not to be fucked with(NTBFW).

It has been my experience that you might get some wise as punk, possibly bolstered with peer pressure by his little buddy who will attempt to antagonize from the outside, throw materials(such as wet toilet pater and towels) or slam repeatedly on the door to the stall. By adjusting your posture, any precautionary glance by these instigators should be nullified. Lastly, every time someone comes in, I like to give a very monotone deep based cough, or sniff... My goal is to let them know I am not to be bothered, and that I am a 400 sumo wrestlers and that the order I have developed is simply a part of the job. Once the bathroom is clear, hall ass... you should have your ass wiped and have rehearsed your exit strategy over and over through out the entire ordeal. ...That is my solution....If its a private bathroom and there is a line or someone knocks..you are essentially fucked.

Jimminychristmas sees the shitty world in the same way I do. Clearly, we do not meet the strict criteria of the shameless shitters, as we would prefer not to be IDed. But this may not be due to shame, as is implied by the term "shameless shitters." It's clear from JC's description that he feels vulnerable when on the pot, and immediately afterward, and I'm not so sure that he isn't right to feel so. His behavior has survival value, and I hope to never encounter him coming out of the crapper, or he me. Have a long and peaceful life, JC.

im a girl and im wondering how often do guys walk into a public bathrooom to find another guy taking a shit. girls are usually really shameful and i dont think ive ever had this experience. im just wondering how often guys come in contact with another shitting man.

I'm a girl, so I can't help you with that question. But I have walked in on a couple of other girls shitting. One girl sounded like she was dumping a major load. I swear it sounded like a shotgun going off in the toilet!

Don't be shameful about your shits, girls. The sooner we become shameless the sooner women are from the shackles of society.

I hate typos. That was supposed to say FREE from the shackles of society.

amen to that, TSV.
I just don't say anything. I admit, I get embarassed to have someone smell my crap, but there's not much that can be done, is there.

It's not a problem! I walk into a toilet, I expect to smell shit - if someone walks in and smells mine - so what? I say nothing, just give a friendly smile if there is eye contact.

In answer to Random Girl above - all the time!! Whether at work or in public toilets, when you walk in to mens toilets there is usually shitting going on. There are a lot of shameless male shitters. Last night I popped in at a motorway services on my way home, and whilst going to wash hands, a teenage boy in a football shirt nonchalantly emerged from a stall after taking a shit to wash his hands - and immediately struck up a conversation with some bloke who'd just walked in about the game he'd been to. Completely shameless!!

I usually say"I'd hold of if I was you,give it 45minutes to an hour for an all clear!" gotta warn um' or you might have a lawsuit on your hands when the person keels over!