Now thats a question and a half.

I guess its all down to whether you're a "folder" or a "scruncher".

As a "folder" I use two squares in one wipe. On average three wipes per poop. Making a total of six sheets in one visit.

I'll be interested to see how everyone else does :o)

Use squares of nine,

You'll be fine.

Wipe times three

Clean you'll be.

I always wipe three times out of habit. How many squares do I use...is hard to determine. I'm a scruncher, I roll the toilet paper until i get a good chunk in my hand to wipe with. If I had to guess, maybe 5-6 squares per bunch...so anywhere between maybe 15-20 squares per wipe.

Scrunching does make it hard to estimate the number of sqares. Of course the quality of the paper is also a factor in this. As a broad average over low-quality 1-ply and plush 2-py, I'd say 4-5 squares with 2-3 wipes. So probably about 12 squares per flush for "average" TP.

I'm folder/re-folder...

So six squares per two passes, average crap is accompanied by 12-18 squares, depending on consistency.

Make that a 635 gram 2.8 liter poop with some squeels of agony and sighs of relief.

No paper here, strictly corncobs.

I'm a scruncher and really I haven't a clue. On 1 ply I just grab what I can, 2 ply, the norm, I use about a foot of TP, and in a recently discovered 2 ply that seems like it should be called 3 ply, I used about 5 sheets.

Folder here. I would say I 5 to 6 squares per wipe. 2 to 3 wipes per occurance.

I'm a scruncher and I use as many as it takes to get clean. Sometimes that's only a few sheets but if it's been a sticky job it can be up to a dozen.

I scrunch and wipe probably 6-7 sqaures. I wipe til I am clean as a whislte. No exact number there.

I'm a scruncher--the average scrunch for me is about 1 foot to 18 inches of paper (regardless of thickness). How many times this gets repeated depends on consistency & sticking power.

At my college, they use the cheapo TP that's only .000000001" thick, plus there's no perforations. This makes it hard for me to estimate how many "squares" I have to use, but I estimate that I have to use at least a few feet worth per duker. But that's a skewed figure, due to the ungodly thin-ness of our TP. Wish I could help more, but that's all for now.

Well its good to see our tax dollars at work up there at A&M...3 sheets for me.

I'm a "scruncher", although try to keep the volume of the TP as low as I can in order to avoid clogging the toilet. I don't buy that thick quilted TP even though it feels nice -- it's too thick to use in our wussy toilet. I wipe until I'm clean, which is usually three times, and I estimate I use about 5-7 squares of TP per wipe, so 15-21 total.

It really does depend on the brand of TP, however. Cheap stuff is thinner. The "double-ply" quilted stuff, like Charmin, is impossible to flush if you use even a modest amount, and I prefer to not get poo on my hands when I wipe!

The toilets at my workplace, however, could suck a golf ball through a straw, so I'm somewhat more liberal with my TP use there.

I don't know how many sheets are in a roll, but I can say this. I usually go through a roll of toilet paper after four hearty shits. So if you have 100 sheets on each roll, then I use an average of 25 sheets per dump. There's no way I could just wipe with two or three sheets. My fingers would poke through way too easily, and I'm there to clean my ass, not penetrate it. If I'm going to shit like a man, I'm going to wipe like one too. I deserve the comfort of wiping with a bedsheet, that's why I need a fistfull of TP after going to war with the toilet.

c~ 16 squares per wipe, 4 wipes per flush.

i grab like eight squares, and wipe as many times as i can realistically fold.

Three-ply?! That's some high-class shit!

I use 10-20 squares every time, depending on how messy it is back there. It'll be 10 if its a nice, clean two-swiper. But if its nasty, I use two sets of 10 squares, flush, repeat as needed.

I have IBS so It is always liquid. I use 2 flushes I for poop and wipes 1 and 2. And a second flush for wipes 3-5

Sorry,

Total Squares 30-50 per poop

I'm a scruncher, I'd say about 4-6 sheets of Cottenelle (God's own toilet paper) for normal heathly poos, and for the messy ones (after hard drinking) I have to go through 3-5 rounds of wiping, which will usually include a courtesy flush after two or three rounds of wiping.

Please develop a toilet that can be flushed repeatedly with minimum wait time! Nothing worse then having to loiter in the can so you can flush the rest of your shit paper down the loo.

And let us know the results! I want to hear how your tests go.

3-4 squares per wipe and wipe till clean, usually about 4 or 5 passes. If it's been a beer and pizza night make it about 3-4 squares per and about 12 wipes. And if tis a true FAWNEW double that to 24..

Well, I'm a scrunch/folder/refolder. I like to save money. I grab about 7-8 squares, wad it up, wipe, fold it in half and wipe again, then I repeat. So, 14-16 squares per shit trip.

The exception is when I have a rock solid turd with little to no residue left behind. That's a two wipe with 7 squares: 1 wipe to realize the situation, 1 for safety measures.

Hey, TP is cheaper than replacing painted undies! Hope this helps.

-AP

im a wasteful pooper buti have a system i wrap the tp roll around my hand 3 times take it off whipe fold whipe. usually about 11-13 sheets if its messy i dont know.

To quote Dave Mordal from Last Comic Standing...

Sometimes you drop and wipe and there is no residue on the paper. I call this a 'white glover'. A white glover signifies good luck for the day.

I wipe an average of 3 times.

I would say the first wipe would use at least 10 squares.

The last 2 maybe 8 each.

I try to always shit at work, even though the government agency that I work for buys the CHEAPEST toilet paper. A better use for it would be tracing paper, as one can look right through it. It takes about a quarter of a roll for one of those dumps where the consistency is somewhere between liquid and solid-- a dump where most of the pudding remains between your cheeks. Since I started on my Metamucil kick, to my delight that type of shit is quite rare. Now the logs just seem to hurl THEMSELVES out. Usually, I just wrap a bunch of paper around my hand and go for it. The toilets are so powerful they could probably handle an entire roll. Make mine about 25 squares, and a couple of damp paper towels on my 'off days'.

I'm in agreement with the 'depending on what tissue' it is. I'm a scruncher. If I'm in no hurry I acutally pull apart the plies and double scrunch giving me more tissue to surface to work with. I'm an average of 5 squares per wipe. So about 15 in all. More if I have the muds.

I wipe a lot, since I dread having an unclean and itchy asshole. I wipe until there is no trace of shit on the paper, and then I root around a bit to get all remaining poo. So, in my estimation, probably close to 30 squares per shit session. More if I have the squirts.

5 to 6 squares per wipe. Usually 2 to 4 wipes per dump. So, between 10 and 24 squares, depending on poo consistency and butt adhesion.

a refined answer by doniker. bravo you giggly turkey necker pervatron!

Since my dumps tend to be really sloopy and painful, I've come to the conclusion that I use approx. 10-15% of a role of standard Super Absorbant Northern Quilted per wipe. General rule of thumb is to continue wiping till there is only a slight light-brown tint on the paper.

Generally 3 wipes, folded, 6-8 sheets per, two-ply paper, plus a pre-moistened Cottonelle wipe.

Definitely a scruncher. I also recently encountered the "ultra," should-be-called-3-ply variety. I didn't need as much of it. Plus I had to use less because it clogged my toilet.

On the average, using reasonably cushy paper, about 5-6 squares per wipe. I also wipe till it's clean, somewhere between 3 and 7 times depending.

3 sheets. 1 up 1 down 1 to polish.

25-30 squares per wipe? You're joking, right? I'm a scruncher, but only 6-8 squares and one wipe is all it usually takes, regardless of what Skid Marky Mark says. I did say "usually", but yeah, there are exceptions.

Depends on how bad the poop is. For a small poop I only use to 2 squares per wipe, 2 squares folded in half, 3 ply, and wipe from 10-20 times. However a massive poop is a different story. 9 sheets roughly folded over is for the first wipe, then going steadily down in number until I hit the 10th wipe, then for another 15 wipes its back to the normal system (or cistern,if you like)

For a normal dump I use about 3 meters. For a long visit after a curry and lager evening upto 9 meters. Sometimes I need to read the daily paper after a curry and lager night because the visit to the toilet can take upto 1 hour. I have been known to have 4 visits to the toilet for a dump after a curry night out. Andrex toilet paper with aloe vera is appreciated after a curry and lager night because it is kind to your bum.

Damn! What's up with you 3-5 square wipers? You know, I've got news for you: Your friends are too embarrassed to tell you, but...YO ASS IS STANK!!!!

Cripes, I use probably something like 20 squares per wipe (I'm a scruncher), and depending on the poop do anywhere from 1 (rarely) to 5 wipes. I don't know about you, but I like my crack to be clean, fresh, and most importantly POOP FREE. I can tell you, 4 squares at a time is not doing the trick.

I mean, the point isn't just to swish some paper through and flush it. You're supposed to WIPE dammit. Remove all those fickle feces. Be the Starship Enterprise (i.e., circle Uranus and wipe up Klingons).

Some of you folks are just plain nasty.

Well... I prefer to wipe until clean (or bleeding) so I would have to say on average of 5-7 squares per swipe with an average of 3-4 swipes per poo(sometimes as many as 8-9 swipes the morning after chili nite). Leaving us with an average per-poo usage of 21 sheets.

My shits come out anywhere from extra tiny to ass-blasters. As for the TP...well, I use a hell of a whole lot. Usually 7-8 per scrunch..I don't want my hand anywhere near my stinky bum after it's made a statement. If it's a high and dry floater, I make one wipe, other times I gotta pause and flush between wipes because it just won't come clean and I don't want my crap hanging around until it breaks down enough to hear that pleasant sucking sound of the toilet after a big one.

Paper? I use a scrub brush and a brillo pad...Don't stop till ya bleed is what I say

I feel like a jerk after reading all of these comments, but I can use up to half a roll at a sitting, when the poo is tenacious enough (I drink a lot of soda, and the poo is a lot like roofing tar, ew).

Damn my overactive enter key. Anyway, I'm a buncher, and probably use 10 squares a wipe. I probably wipe 10 times on average, and end up having to flush about 3-4 times to avoid cloggage; one for the turds, and a few for the paper.

Okay, I forgot one important fact which might be of interest to Mr. Scientist (or is that Dr. Scientist?). After taking my morning poo, I just realized that because I have an aging 1970s toilet, if I don't flush after 3-4 passes it clogs almost without fail.

The average here seems to be about 3 wipes, with about 6-7 squares per. I fit right in there.

Let's see. I'm a scruncher. 8 squares of two ply. 3 wipes. 24 sheets per shit.

125 grams for 500ml volume would mean that the average poop is a "floater". I cant speak for anyone else but in my case floaters are a minority, not a majority.

about 5 wipes with as much TP my little hand can hold. i don't wanna be any closer to what came out than i have to be. and the crack must be clean. not even a hint of what just occured can be left. i'd say 25-35 sheets per poo. and that's 2 ply.

Buy three ply, seperate into single ply and use both sides. 1 three ply, six wipes...

I'm a folder/wrapper. I take 6 sheets per wipe and I wipe until I'm clean as a whistle, then one for good luck. I would say I use 24-36 sheets per poopanoid.

i prefer the skin method. i swipe my ass with my finger then maybe use one sheet or spalsh some soap and water on it. think globally act locally

It Varies From Three Squares For a Dry Turd up To ten squares for Pizza-Beer shit.

Usually it's a three stroke affair and the a damp wascloth to finish.

I don't understand how anyone could use such small amounts of paper as is being described here. An average roll of paper will usually last through about five good dumps. However, extra messy ones take a lot more than that, especially if a get a lot on my cheeks. That's two fist-fulls for each cheek and probably a minimum of three fist-fulls for what's between them. Many times, I do a half-time intermission flush, just to play it safe. Also, I'll need to inspect the underwear... if they're stained, that could lead to a lot of scrubbing and many more wads of paper!

I do the "wrap around the hand" move and use an average 23 squares per wad. This allows use of the "Foldover" tecnique which provides at least one more wipe per wad. I wipe till clean so I use an average of 2 wads per dump. I've used many other tecniques but I think the "wad" method is the best to prevent digital penetration of the wiping paper. Cause you really don't want that stuff anywhere it doesn't have to be.

My poops take about 6-8 squares, i gauge by when the roll gets goin, when it hits the floor. After that i do one really good and slow wipe, that does it for me.

The real scourge of low-flow toilets are those pre-moistened Cotonelle wipes. No sewage system is strong enough to handle those thick suckers! (I'm a folder, 8 sheets, 3-4 wipes, 3-4 flushes = 18-24 sheets total).

Randy, you're friends don't want to tell you this, but every time you get up from a chair, there's a lingering whiff of ass. Six to eight squares is Not Enough.

avg 8 squares per wipe, avg of three wipes = 24 squares.

I would have to say that I am the exception to the rule. I don't feel clean, no matter how much I wipe, and if I wipe too much I chafe my ass until it bleeds. So.... I don't wipe. I only poop if I am at home and can take a shower after. My shower has a "snake" attachment that I can position to blast my ass (not a handheld, but one that you can shape any way you want and it keeps the shape. There is about 3 feet length on it). Then, when I am done blasting, I soap it up and rinse it out. When I am done, I could eat off of my butthole it is so clean.

Certainly, it is the best way to do it. I just wish that everyone else agreed and put those snake style shower heads in every shower so I could travel without that problem.

Finally took a couple of good science-worthy dumps last night, so I counted up my squares and wipes, taking note of turd consistency, wiping action, and other environmental factors.

My first dump was pebbly--more gas than stool. A disappointment, really. I used 8 squares x 2 wipes on that one, as there wasn't much ass-residue to take care of. Forty-five minutes later I was back in the shitter for the second dump, which I'm happy to say made up for the wimpiness of the first in every respect. I used a little more TP on this one: 10 sheets the first wipe, 11 the second. I noticed that the second time I wiped I conserved paper by wiping once, folding, and wiping again on a different, clean part of the TP ball. When I noticed this it seemed like a familiar action, so I concluded that this must be habitual for me: scrunch and wipe once to get the messy stuff, scrunch and wipe twice to finish up, and then wipe a third time on a different part of the TP just to make absolutely sure I've gotten everything.

I should probably also report that I was at school at the time that I took these dumps, so the paper was the superthin institutional variety. If this survey is still going the next time I shit at home (wiping with normal 2-ply TP), I'll follow up this report with another.

it depends if it's my own tp at home or a public one.. i use 10-12 sheets, wipe, fold and wipe again, until i get a clean wipe. If at home, I use 4-5 squares, fold, and wipe again, and repeat until clean.

I like using odd numbers like 5 sometimes cos it gives me a slighly larger wiping area.

I use fiddy dolla bills ya'll. If I only have hundees I rip 'em in half. i use 'bout fo hundy and fody fo yo....

The "big ten wiper" comes to mind. 10wipes x 10papers per wipe x 3flushes= 1000wp x 3f= 3000wpf. The building I live in recently put in the 1.5 gallon flush system, down from 5 g.f.s. I asked my housing specialist, well, what about people like me who poop out huge amounts, what are we supposed to do when it gets stuck in the potty?' "Always keep a cutting instrument by the toity bowl, and you should be fine." she said. Yes, but what about all that paper! It's no wonder why the Duluth Sanitary Districts poopy pollution gets accidently emptied into Lake Superior, something like 6,000,000 gallons this last time! It's about time somebody got down to business about poop standards and waste quantities. Thank you Poop Report. Ktt

I'm a scruncher...uhhh I'd say about 5 square thingys per scrunch...depending on the consistency I'd say 15 squares (I waste so much... I just realized this :S)

I use scott TP, and I just wack the roll till a bunch comes down, don't know how much really....then I scrunch and then repeat....it's always a good time wiping the poop from my little bum.

well...in the morning poop deposit, I don't use TP as I usually just go to the shower and clean my butt with water. But when I make my deposit at work or whatever, it really depends how messy it is. But I like wrap I say about 6 times (never counted the squars) wipe, fold, wipe, fold till all is used and maybe have to reload up to 3 times.

crappercritic (anonymous coward) -- 9.9.2003

a refined answer by doniker. bravo you giggly turkey necker pervatron!

sorry I couldn't say something to harden your dick...I was tired that night.

Are you ever going to get your own life or are you going to feed off of me forever?

I don't count the amount of squares, not enough time. I enjoy a clean efficient visit if possible, dump and run, you get the picture. It seems I use approximately 3 complete spins of the roll and get it good, double up and wipe until no more is visible on the paper. One spin may contain a certain number of squares, so I would estimate more or less. I've found that metamucil and other psyllium-husk type roughage suppliments will make quite a neat stack that takes one 3-spin wipe-n-wad. Those are the pre-shower ones. I will wipe before shower, because if I miss something en route from commode to shower, I don't want anything winding up on the floor. At work you must use more paper because you are going back to work and hopefully not carry that just-crapped aura with you. Someone told me of this lady taking a great big shiite after lunch every day and from then on I was unable to talk to her without thinking I smelled it, she standing there smiling pleasantly trying to carry on a conversation and all I could think of was if I imagined or did she really that freshly-pooped glow.

It varies. I mean you wouldn't wipe once for the runs and you wouldn't wipe 5 times for one of the magic poops where there is nothing to wipe right? (man i love those)

I am a folder and a scruncher depending on the mess. Also, I am an incredibly uptight person about being clean so I wipe till I am dry, then "wash" with those cotonelle wet wipes you guys debate so much about. I may dry wipe 3 times then "wash" twice.

So at random, for a normal poo see above, for a really messy i may wipe 5-6 times plus "wash" 2+ to make sure I am not carrying any baggage.

I'm a folder and use 3 or 4 squares per wipe and about 5 or 6 wipes, it varies doesnt it and u gotta be clean. Oh and one at the end just to wipe the seat clean, :-)

i normally dont poop for 4 days at a time so when i go its atleast a 3 flusher i normally have to wipe 2 times persitting and im a folder with scruncher tendioncys but normally 5-6 squares per wipe

I'm a scruncher AND a folder. I scrunch about five or six squares, wipe, fold, and repeat until the poo density on the paper is low enough to satisfy me. If I need to keep up the fight, I grab another two or three sheets, scrunch and you get the drill.

2 squares per wipe & I wipe 4-6 times, so on average between 8-12 squares per poop, total.... unless I have diarrhea then maybe up to 16 or 18 total.

I use 3 folds@2 per fold so 6 squares but if im drunk i may use 10 squares and i wipe my backside 3 or 4 times cause i have a vary keen sense of smell so a roll in our house lasts maybe 1 day .

I'm a heavy drinker, and I am also on a low carb diet, so I usaully have a chicken nugget holding back niagra falls, I usaully use about 20-30 sheetes of 2 ply, 20 for low pressure release, 30 for high pressure release where I have to wipe my ass cheeks, if I dont drink and eat normally, I only use about 8-12 sheetes, fold and reuse, that usually does the trick, unless it is hot outside, that seems to make my my poo turn into tomato paste, and that usaully takes a 1/4 roll of 2 ply with a babywipe and follow up wipe with another 4-5 pieces!

I also have had some poo that could stain glass, it is so enriched with black poopy pigment, I could paint a whole house with one of these monsters, that definitly needs a shower after, or a tampon in my ass from all the schaffing from wiping, cause you wipe up and its clean, then you wipe down and it still comes, you almost got to shove toilet paper in your cornhole to dig out the hideaways that will release later and stain your underwear!

Usually it takes about 10 - 15 sheets per wipe, and about three wipes per poop. Ocasionally there is the ten wipe poop, but that is only after Mexican food(oximoron).

My hubby and I got into a "heated" discussion about this last night. So today I counted when I went and the magic number is: between 8 & 9 pieces of 2 ply per wipe, sometimes 2 wipes per "sitting" (depending on the action).

i suppose i;m a folder. i don;t normally count the amount, since my dumps are usually not messy, i can clean adequetly. i only use 2-ply though. Another reason why i love to take shits at home.

I just put a big beehive on my hand and wipe. I've never counted the sheets.

I'm a 12-incher...that is, I use about a foot or so of TP per duke, although I've been know to go the extra mile, in cases of premature pinch, etc. The Wife, however, is a different story. *A ROLL A DAY*. No poop. She clogs the toilet regularly and, if she forgets to flush (must get pretty winded after unwinding a whole roll of TP) there is dry TP that sticks above the bowl.

humm i kinda wing it! i tend to wrap it around my had a few times... but i also kinda to that folding thing, so i use my tp wisely... and theres always those few that get stuck to my shoes so i would have to say 18-20 squares. i have been told i am cheep but i guess they havent seen my in the bath room, cause when it comes to washing away all that fun in your crack you cant afford to be cheap...
ohh and dont do drugs... they clog the whole system up!

Firstly, I am glad I dont keep any of you blokes with your toilet paper consumption. Secondly, American toilets are SO Whoosy. When I was in the US, I would do a turd every other day, give or take. Religiously, the toilet wood clog, I learned to snap em off in half shots, and then paper separatly. In AUstralia, I have NEVER clogged a toilet. am definately a scruncher. 5 squares 1st wipe as a determination of what else is needed. then 8 sheets scrunched, wipe, fold em over, wipe. 3rd swipe 4 sheets to ensure absolutely no-residue. REpeat as requireed. Usually 15-18 sheets per poo (every other day).

I went to thailand recently, and I got to say, crapping there is awesome. They have some things us Americans need to learn. They have this spray thing, like you have on a sink to wash dishes, but to spray your ass. Then you need to wipe only once and your ass is like it just came out of the shower. It is so sanitary and smart. Why doesnt american toilets have this installed. I want to start a movement, everyone should buy these hoses and attach them to your toilet and start spraying to a better and cleaner tomorrow!!!

Maybe I was never taught the right way to wipe my ass, but some of these folks really seem to have it down to a science. Personally, the amount of paper that I use depends on the turd itself. Since I am no longer obsessive compulsive I have no idea how much paper I use. Being a scruncher I just grab a few squares (probably 6-8) wad it up and wipe, check, fold, and wipe again. How some of these folks can get a way with wiping 3 times with only 2 squares is a mystery to me. Are they clean after 3 wipes, permanent skid marks in their underwear, or are they just constipated? I always have to wipe 3 or 4 times too, but keep in mind I’m a scruncher, and I fold the 6-8 squares at least 3 – 4 times each after the first wipe. Therefore, I would say that I use 25 – 32 squares after a dump of normal texture.

well ill do a live experiment, i need a shit now so i thought lets try a shitty website (pun intended) and i came here. well im off now for a nice big relaxing shit results soon

well, i cant call that a fair test bcoz it was 1 of those shits that doesnt happen very often, after the initial wipe more decided it wanted freeedom so i wiped again and the same happened 3 times so a total of 57 sheets was used, and many tears were shed

My ass is so hairy that I have to use way too much toilet paper. I usually use almost the whole roll and wipe 15-20 times. It's so bad that I usually just take a shower after so I can save money on toilet paper.

I just had a toilet paper dingleberry. It was very annoying because I actually had to untwist the asshairs around it to remove it. I think I'll clip my asshairs.

I think i use well above the average number of wipes and therefore paper. I use three pices of paper folded once for each wipe. I think i do somewhere in the region of six wipes plus the odd bit of shoving it up in to get really clean so around 24 sheets. A factor not to overlook it the anti-splash paper put in the toilet by many before pooing. I use about ten sheets for this making about 34 sheets plus poo going through the pipe at a time. Nowonder i often have to flush twice.

I was once a "scruncher", but became a "folder" because we were constently running out of toilet paper. What I do is tear off 3 sheets and fold one sheet over the other. I usually buy 2 ply, so we are talking about 6 ply of thickness per wipe. First I do an up wipe, fold it, and then a down wipe. I usually do a total of 4 wipes which only ends up using 6 sheets.

I use 1 sheet for 3 wipes.

I DO NOT USE TOILET PAPER I WIPE BARE HANDED

I'M OFTEN ASKED FOR ADVICE SO I'M GIVING SOME.

I RECOMMEND WASHING THE ASS THOROUGHLY. ESPECIALLY AFTER TAKING A SHIT AND I MEAN IMMEDIATELY AFTER. IT SEEMS TO ME THAT LESS THAN 1 OF EVERY 1000 PEOPLE DO. I'VE SEEN THOUSANDS ANNOUNCE THAT THEY ARE GOING TO TAKE A DUMP AND THEY RETURN IN 90 SECONDS AND IN THAT TIME WE HEAR TOILET FLUSHING BUT NO SINK OR SHOWER WATER RUNNING.

I'VE DISCUSSED THIS WITH OVER 100 PEOPLE AND ONLY ONE PERSON HAS AGREED WITH ME. THE REST SEEM TO CONSIDER ME OVERLY FASTIDIOUS. I DON'T CARE. ON THIS SUBJECT I CAN CONFIDENTLY DECLARE THAT I KNOW I AM RIGHT.

WITH ALL THE SEX THAT GOES ON I HAVE TO WONDER HOW PEOPLE CAN BE PHYSICALLY INTIMATE WITH PEOPLE THAT LEAVE SHIT STUCK IN THEIR ASSCRACKS FOR MANY HOURS. ESPECIALLY THOSE THAT SPEND APPALLING SUMS OF MONEY ON CLOTHES AND THINGS TO ENHANCE THEIR APPEARANCE AND SMELL AND THEN THEY WILL TAKE A SHIT AND GIVE IT THE QUICKEST DRY WIPE AND SLIP EXPENSIVE UNDERWEAR BACK OVER AN ASS CAKED WITH SHIT AND WALK AROUND ALL DAY AND NIGHT LIKE THAT.

I DON'T SEE HOW ANYONE CAN REASONABLY ARGUE THIS POINT WITH ME AND NO ONE EVER ACTUALLY HAS. ONE PERSON RECENTLY TRIED BUT THE BEST HE COULD DO WAS TO SAY THAT I HAVE A "SHIT PHOBIA". RIGHT. I WOULD RATHER NOT SMELL OR TASTE OR HANDLE SHIT SO THERE MUST BE SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME.

SURE.

Man, I have been poo-ing like 3-4 times daily....this isn't normal is it? I used to only poo like once every other day. (Im a scruncher) so i have been using a ton of paper

For me, its a minimum of 8 squares per wipe, depending on the paper, minimum of two wipes, so an minimum average of 16 squares per incident.

Tha is, unless I'm using waxed paper, in which case, one sheet, one wipe, and no one close to me for the next several hours.

princess, it's perfectly normal to poop 3-4 times a day. i do, too. different people poop different amounts, and, as far as i know, there's no right or wrong amount. unless you absolutely never go, or go so much you live in the bathroom. that would be wrong.

however, if you used to poop less often, there could be various reasons for this. if your eating habits have changed, that could be one reason. or maybe you started drinking coffee when you didn't used to. but i don't think you need to worry about it unless it becomes a problem.

and if i'm wrong, someone feel free to correct me!

On average I use 1 baby wipe and 4 squares folded over (1-2 times).
So...
1 baby wipe
4-8 squares.

By the way, I use two-ply.

what do you do if your poop gets stuck in the tube?

Ahh. Anything in the name of science.

I'm a folder, refolder. I tend to use 4 squares of the luxuriously fluffy, cottony 2-ply I splurge on at home. The number of wipes will always vary with consistency but I would say I average 4 wipes with 2 refolds and 1 reload. Total of 8 squares.

Outside of my home sanctuary, tp standards are much lower. I just keep unfurling the roll until I have sufficient mass to keep fingers and pucker from kissing.

Just wondering, is the focus only on fecal wipes? Guys may only have to give a carefree flick after a piss but girls have tp needs beyond the bowel. I use 3 squares for a #1.

Darkling

There is no universal answer to the question 'How Much Paper per Poop?' It can vary from person to person, and also depends on what you have eaten.

But my Granddad tried to lay down the law for my Dad. My Dad was born early in World War II, and he never knew his own Dad until he came out of the Forces, when he was aged 6. He was a stranger and an intruder to him. On the first morning when he came home, my Dad went out of the room. My Granddad said 'Where are you going?' He said 'To the lavatory'. He had learnt from my Gran to look upon his morning dump as a private activity, and did his own wiping from age 4. He was getting fed up with his Dad already, although he had only been home for 12 hours, and was looking forward to a few minutes of peace. Settled on the throne, he pushed his penis inside for a number 1, to stop him wetting the floor. That done, he started to squeeze. Nobody would disturb him now He was wrong! Footsteps got louder up the yard, the door was opened, and in burst Granddad. 'I've just come to see that you are doing it properly', he said. My Dad wanted to cry - he didn't like this stranger staring at him while his shorts were round his ankles. He had done this in private for 2 years now. When he had finished his dump, he leaned towards the toilet roll, but his Dad pulled him partly off the toilet to look down inside, to see how much he had done.

He stayed to watch him wipe, and then said he had used too much paper. He said ‘I only use 3 sheets, you have used 7’. Then he sent my Dad back into the house, and used the toilet himself. Dad tried using fewer sheets, but then his mother, my Gran, started complaining about the soiled state of his underpants. Granddad then agreed that there should be no restriction on the number of squares used, ‘but don’t waste it’. This, and several other bossy attitudes, made my Dad rather nervous and withdrawn for a time. When he went to stay overnight at a school friend’s, he knew he would be sitting on the toilet in the morning, he asked how many squares of paper he was allowed to use.

My Dad made sure with me and my sister that there would be no such nonsense. We could use as much as we needed., and this is the attitude we have shown to our children. Actually my older teenage daughter monopolises the bathroom after breakfast, when the boy would prefer to be sitting on the bog (as he calls it). We only have one toilet, inside the only bathroom. My son has altered his routine so that he can ‘go’ at school when he gets there. He cleans his teeth in the kitchen, and gets on his bike, with some paper and soap in his rucksack, in case there isn’t any at school. When he has locked his bike, he asks the duty prefect for permission to use the toilets. In he goes, and does his first business of the school day, followed by an enjoyable wipe. We all learn to our cost that a skimped wipe can give a very sore bum.

I go with the finest crapper paper I can buy, do to borderline roids. If you can't afford the best, something is wrong. About two feet/wipe, and as many wipes as it takes to come up clean, approx 6, for about 12 feet per dump, assuming a non-liquid crap.

I try and use as little paper as possible as I am a scrooge. At the moment I have found a really decent way of completely wiping using just 3 squares of paper. The rolls last ages!

Personally, (with 2-ply by choice) I fold/scrunch and wipe as much as it takes to get the poo-doodles or shmear off (Depending on how hard or juicy the poop is). Then, I top it off with a wet wipe, fold over and wipe once more! So fresh and so clean, clean! You could eat a toss salad out of this poop-hole!

Wipe-As-Much-As-You-Like's comment (18 months ago) highlights a little-realissed aspect of World War II, when some fathers didn't see their children in their early years, and tried to make up for it by being bossy - especially if that child was a boy. Girls they were more likely to dote over.

WW2? This STILL happens! I can't tell you how many times I've heard a military spouse bemoan what it's like to have someone come back from war in Iraq or
Bosnia or Kosovo and have to put up with some soldier who's decided that they're going to take over the family, even though the mom has been doing just fine for the past 15 months.

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.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

What Daphne describes is well-known. GottaMan served in Saudi Arabia for a year during Desert Shield/Storm. We didn't have kids yet, so that wasn't an issue, but our relationship was never the same after that separation.

When our guys (and a few gals) were rotated back, there were all kinds of public service announcements, flyers, classes, etc... about "How To Cope Now That Your Spouse Is Back".

One of the main points they talked about was how the returning parent deals with the kids. I bet toileting is one of the issues!

I am shocked, SHOCKED that in all these comments only one person has mentioned baby wipes!!!! There is no other way for a fully clean and non-chafing wipe (except the shower that some of you mentioned which is jut not always practical). Ever since I figured out they are not just for babies, my life has improved by 100%! (But you need to limit them to 2 per flush or they clog the toilet, so I follow up with a scrunch of dry paper to finish the job.) Trust me folks--you'll never go back!!!