try soakind down or using a spray bottle with peroxide to saturate anus and teticle area as well as pubic hairs (it actually foams...so you know there must be a lot or residual bacteria there...it foams even after soaping and rinsing) then rinse thouroughly..havent tried the clear gel doedorant but sounts like a good idea..have been using shower to shower...i sometimes soap up anus and genital area and then pur and mix peroxide with lather for better dispersment, dispersion(spread-around-ness)(splchk?)..have acutally (embarrassing) been using thin panty liners to cover sphinctor area in undergarments (drawers tidey whiteys)...will try thye witch hazel wipes too.

have heard "what stinks?" "whats that smell?" "did you fart,poot,bust one?" "who shit theie pants" and the ever popular "ewwww" for much of my adult life...going to try the green stuff too. also i figured out i had a bad sinus infection and thats where the fart smell was coming from (i use nasal spray with oxymetazoline chloride 0.05%). i drool in my sleep and it causes bacteria-germ-fungal-whatever build-up in my sheets, bed and pillow which in turns enters my sinus cavities and causes them to slam shut in response which in turn causes the sinus fluids to turn rancid and the bacteria to proliferate (make more and more bacteria as it grows and replicates). nasal douching (ha ha..i said douching) with warm saltwater helps too.

good luck and my prayers go out to all those suffering with this as well. its not easy...and family members and friends dont tell you because they dont want to hurt your feelings (for those of us really suffering from it...others may just be paranoid).

those mispelled words are typos..can spell deodorant testicles sounds and other words...i just type real crappy (no pun intended)

This IS one of the best boards I've seen yet. I agree that a "rank" odor of "doo" is really a turn off, but the natural smell of a lover's anus can be quite stimulating to put it nicely.

Good anal hygiene is a must. In europe and many Asian countries they use bidets (bih-days) which are like a second toilet that washes your ass after using the toilet. We should have them here in the USA. Granted not every household abroad has them, but they seem more common there.

For some good anal maintenence I use Gold Bond Med Powder in my crack. Simple, cheap and effective. It keeps you nice and dry where the sun don't shine. That helps keep down smelly bacteria! It also gives my hole a nice tingly feeling to start the day!

Is it just me, or do you find that your poop stinks WAY more when you are sick? Mine does. It smells so bad even I can't stand it!

There is a term, yet unknown to this forum, that captures the very essence of these tales of woe. The poop/sweat combination can be more succinctly referred to as "pweat" (pwet). This deadly combination of butt-mud and human fluid excretion in the taint area is often accompanied by smells of tacos, roast beef, or salt & vinegar potato chips. It can also have the unfortunate side-effect of "skid marks" if not controlled quickly.

wipe your ars wid baby wipes 4 a fresher smell

Go to google, type in: ass smell

and then click 'I'm feelin' Lucky' and follow the instructions

I have to wash my ass with moisture every time I shit or I get the itchy ass. Its not the hair, its not the sweat.. Its the shit. The anus is not a perfect shit valve. Its almost like breaking a seal, you almost have to clean past the rim inside a bit and get that skin to skin seal back...Spraying deodarant in your ass crack is just silly...And who the hell is smelling the seat cushions?? If someone is leaving behind a shitty smell on the seats through their underwear and pants they are just unclean and taken out back and shot. One more good tip, how about spreading your cheeks when you sit down so you dont get a full slide on the actually cheeks?
Bahahaha...Now to eat a whole bran muffin and drink a cup of coffee.

Like a golden ticket in a bar of chocolate ~ that heady realisation is the day-maker of them all... when the virgin wipe comes up clean. Innit : )

ass leakage due to ANAL INCONTINENCE.I'm over 40 and just now found out about this after a lenghthy Google search.Some people's ass leaks, like urine incontinence.Except this si shit, instead of pee.Apparently, a lot of folks on this post may be suffering from this.Look up anal incontinence.

ok heres the deal: this is all a matter of science, as is every thing. Your ass is going to have an odor, period. Theres nothing you can do thats what nature intended. You body has evolved to support the bacteria that cause odor because our ancestors found it pleasing and sexually arousing. This odor led to further exploration of other humans genitals and lead to sex. This is y ur no no parts are hairy, hair provides a breeding ground for bacteria that produce these odors, wether u find them offending or not.(To the genleman who shaved his ass and it smelled worse due to a greasy residue, u simply didnot clean properly) It was the egyptians who first linked body oder with body hair and subsequently saved their underarms as even tody this "cumin-y" smell is more universaly identified as being offensive over odors from "down there". Napoleon Boneparte, conqueror of europe was documented in a letter to his notoriously unfathful wife Josephene as follows : My love, i shall return home in six days.DO NOT BATHE. One of the greatest men to walk the earth liked himself some stank.That is our nature. In inda male elephants,when in heat,release a foul smelling liquid from a gland behind their heads. Indians refer to this as must.When a person is described as being "musty must" they r a person who has a lust 4 life and r usually considered sexy.And any1 who watches hbo's Deadwood knows a lonely miner would pay gold for "a wiff o' cunt" in post civil war usa. I peronaly am somewhat of a olfactophiliac(some one who becomes aroused by a smell, usually the genetals and anus)I absolutely crave the scent of a girls ,sweaty not shitty, ass. I personally do not care 4 a fishy pussy but i love the musk between a womans thighs. i love ass : lickit ,smack it, smell it suck it, fuck it , u name it. but only when an ass is clean (no shitting between the shower snd my face) but she can feel free to do an hour on a treadmill b4 hand. but thats just me, some people like shit smell, im not one to judge. Our recent distain for indecent odors is two fold #1 we are taught to dislike it and find it gross and #2 as we evolve more sophistocated means of mating and courtship we become less reliant on sexual smells and smell becomes an sense that A)attracts us to food and B)repels us from harmful bacteria. When we were beasts smelling an ass was like a handshake many forms of modern primate greet each other with a "how do you do" consisting of bending over in from of the face of another. Smelling ass and shit,if the nose is refined enough can tell an animals aproximate age, gender, species, health, diet,domain,preaditory tendencies, pregnancy and willingness to mate. your dogs and cats do it every day. ...Now back to the harmful bacteria , if your ass or genetals smell excessevly (like if you can smell an odor within a foot of there area thru clothes and underwear and u shower once a day) it is probably a good idea to refrain from sexual contact until the area is washed as u can become ill. As for body odor in general.BO ,downstairs or not, has many contributing factors. it is your body chemestry. change the soap u use, clothes u wear remember cotton breathes, diet , deoderant,colonges,medications, food additives, may make u in particular ,smell worse than you actually do . ANAL HYGENE is a must but ill get into that a different time as it is 4 am and i have consumed two botlles of sauvignon blanc (which is described as having a cat piss aroma)and am quite drunk until then any questions? next week: doc's tips for anal hygene complete with scientific basis

peronally = personaly please forgive my drunken spelling

saved=shaved i cant believe i wrote this last nite

wash your butt everytime you crap, even taking a shower in the morning you will not clean the but after pooping. That is a rule. Also shower before having sex, no matter if you showered in the morning, that needs to be a shower fresh deal. Stinky guys are not a turn on... I had a boyfriend who also didnt brush his teeth before sex, you could actually see a paste of plaque on his teeth.

Just before you go pick up your woman, let out half a crappa from your ass and leave it there. The missile head should be reekin plenty by the time you are goin down for clam chowder.

At least your ass smells and not your breath. It could always be worse.

Tydirium ...sometimes tp is not enough no matter how good you wipe ...maybe you should consider getting a bidet or something symilar or if you cant aford one you should totally try some baby wipes at the end? and if it bothers you all that much you could always cary some with you for when your ass needs some refreshing even if you don`t poop.
Do you have hair growing in your crack ? if you do it could be a reason why you are having such a hard time keeping fresh ...maybe you should wax it?...or maybe you should try a change in your diet....it is known that lots of spicy food and meat will make your poop smell worst.Hope this helps!

I got a stinky buttcrack aswell

I think it all started a year ago when I put Old Spice antiperspirant/deodorant on my butthole.
I know I stink because sometimes someone like my bro will say something like, "it kind of smells like ass in here"
I wipe my ass good
Take 2 showers a day
I am not fat (weigh 155 and am 5'11)

Not only does my butt area stink but I sweat ALOT from there aswell.
If you ever look at my boxers when I am done working out, running or doing something that makes me sweat alot you will see.

I think I will go see a doctor soon before doing anything of what you guys are saying.
Oh yeah, I will still stink even after taking a shower. And yes, I do clean EVERYWHERE. Infact, i scrub hard on my butthole but that still wont take the smell away.

By the way,
I am not sure if it was the deodorant that caused me to have the bad smell. It sounds pretty stupid that just putting some Old Spice white Deodorant skin on your crack could cause a bad smell for such a long time even after showering twice a day.

Just go see a doctor.
As a matter of fact, what doctor is suppose to work on asses?

Oh yeah, putting deodorant on your crack is stupid. Most deodorants can make you sweat more and thats a no no for a stinky ass crack.
Its like putting clogne to cover up bad BO

mr. x a proctologist is an 'ass doctor'

If you accidently got some of your shit on your arm or leg you would rushing to the sink to wash it off the stink and yet people find it accptable to have it around their ring pieces.
This also leads to soreness around the whole area (like nappy rash).The problem is made worse if you leave a couple of bum nuts around your crack!!!

Um... ok? /\

Has anyone in here cured this problem themselves without going to see a proctologist?
What did you do?

Help a brother out!
I need it!

Its easy guys.After u take a dump, just use water,soap & paper. Ask any Muslim, they use these giant teapot style watering cans called LOTTAS. Fucking problem solved u dirty bastards!

Why there is nothing like a shit caked hairy rectum that satisfies the perverse more than anything else. When I was a boy in France, we did'nt use Andrex, just leaves of a plant to wipe the fudge away !

Mind you, I,ve never laughed as much for ages after reading some of you guys' comments.It is a funny if very cliched subject.But don't you find it's always the Brits thattalk about smelly arses,cocks & cunts all the time?

Yes, but it's the French that invented it all my friend. Twas the commoners that said the filthier the body is,it provokes a voluptuos reaction within people like myself

Hmmm....So it's just Europeans in general then?

Ok ok. Everyone who smells like shit listen up.

I to suffer from smelling like ass. I didn't know, and noone has ever said it directly. Just smart comments and shit untill i started working with someone who had the smae problem. And after getting a whiff of him, i finally understood. It was like someone put a fresh steamer right under my nose.

So, after getting over the embarrassment and hurt of NOONE telling me, i started to research why it happens. So this is a quick rundown.

You are probably a bit constipated.

Prob. a bit dehydrated.

Your breath smells like a poo.

You might drink coffee, eat high fat foods and generally a diet without a lot of veggies.

You might be lactose intolerant and have reflux.

There are so many more symptoms i can't be bothered listing but you get the idea. So you have to think it through logically.

You need to make sure you are getting your shit the fuck out first of all. So you gotta change your diet. Eat heaps and heaps of veggies, and try to have a good variety. Try to cut back on meat, coffee and high sugar or processed foods. DONT EAT WHEAT. You know they used to use flour and water to put wallpaper up!!?? Imagine what that does in your bowel!! Maybe try and avoid dairy for a while.

For most people that will help a lot.

Cleaning wise, you don't need to go over the top. I would advise against anti bacterial stuff on your skin, cos it kills bad and good bacteria. Make sure you wash with a cloth or something that can exfoliate(not scrub) your skin. A couple of times a week, have a bath in hot water with a litre(or the equivilant to that amount in the living in the 1700's USA) of apple cider vinegar and exfoliate with a cloth or sumthun. Wash the vinegar off with cold water after.

Hope this helps some people.

I'll check back in a couple of days if anyones got any q's.

I'm going to whack my root.

Well, for a nation of dirty bastards what do you expect.Just keep yourselves fucking clean every day. It does'nt cost much and its not rocket science to use water when poss is it?
If you do still suffer from a dirty smelly buttring,then I'm afraid you must be just a lazy scruff or most definitely either a student or a loner (maybe both)

baby wipes, yes that is a great idea. And in between wipes to cut down on the sweat and odor you can use baking soda. Its better than baby powder because it isn't perfumed and won't cause any infections and will still obsorb the odor.
And try talking to your girl about it. Everybody at some point in their life has had a stinking ass. Try making her smell her own crack and maybe she'll let up on yours.

Someone mentioned that garlic and onions makes a bad smell. I have been eating many cloves of raw garlic lately, and even when I am out fishing in the woods and the wind is blowing and it is raining cats and dogs I still get sorrounded by the smell every time I fart. Even when I am bicycling like 30-40 km/hour, it still hits me hard.
I agree with the posters who say wash the ass with water and possibly a gentle soap every time you take a dump. When it comes to shaving the ass, I think that over time, the ass will stop sweating. Just give it time.
To really combat a smelly ass, I would say wash the ass with Head & Shoulders Shampoo, there is a very gentle sensitive skin version of it that has no perfume and is very mild on the skin. The H&S contain Zinc Pyritione, which is a very potent broad spectru bacteria killer. It is like dropping napalm on the jungle of the ass, it kills off the nasty viet congs who are out on patrol and it keeps the rest inside their tiny tunnels for a while.

One more thing, the OBI mentioned that mostly the british are obsessed with humour relating to the digestive system. There is a funny episode of Blackadder wuth Rowan Atkinson in World War 1 that confirms this. Blackadder and Baldrick and Lord Flashheart, who is a british flying ace have been taken prisoners by the germans, and they are visited by the german flying ace, Baron von Richthofen. Richthofen says he admires the british and their jokes about the breaking of the wind. For the germans it is just a daily function, but for the british the foundation of an entire culture.
Here are some very funny sound clips from the edisode, check out the ones with Richthofen esp.

http://www.cs.princeton.edu/~min/black/sounds.html

wow, off topic

You know, you don't have to shave off ALL of your fur...how bout putting a #1 guard on the electric clippers and goin to town around the brown.
Leave it short enough to keep things cleaner and long enough not to itch.

The Shit Volcano -- 03.31.2004
You know that women smell worse then men dont you??? like in the secret commercials it says "strong enough for a woman" thats why i use secret(imaguy)

Wow people are still answering this thread??? its been over 2 years

why should i use a clear deo n sted of stik?

Hey "I stink too"
Did the smell go away?

I have emailed this site and this is the response I got:

-----------------------------
FROM: dave@poopreport.com

"Hi there,

Unfortunately I really don't know what's going on with you. It's a
strange thing. The only thing I can guess is that you have some muscle
problems leading to a looser sphincter or something, and that the old
spice was just kinda coincidental. I doubt the old spice caused the
problem... more likely, you just developed a problem right around the
same
time. I have no idea, though. The best I can do is suggest you go to
the
doctor... that's what they're there for.

Dave

-----------------------------
FROM: de_chronic_2k5@yahoo.com
>
> name: Mr. X
>
> publish: yes
>
> words: My ass stinks really bad
>
> For one, I dont smoke weed, dont get confused by my e-mail address.
> Second, I take showers twice a day
> Third, I am being serious about this, please be mature about this
topic.
>
> Ok here is the story
> About a year ago I put some Old Spice antiperspirant/deodorant (the
one
that is white called PureSport) on my "butthole" (dont ask why, I was
a
moron).
> Eversince then, my "butthole" has been sweating like a mofo and
sometimes, someone like my brother might say something like, "kind of
smells like ass in here".
> I Only put OldSpice on my butthole like two times and it managed to
create some type of smell in my butthole. I havent tried doing
anything
else to my butthole since then except cleaning it hard...
>
> When I shower, I scrub hard on my butthole. No it dosent hurt but
even
after showering properly, I still manage to stink like ass.
> I dont smell really bad. Some people dont notice it, some people do.
>
> I wipe my butt well after taking a dump on my toilet.
>
> I heard something about preparation H wipes? I dont know, what do
you
guys suggest I do to get rid of this smell?
>
>
-----------------------------------------

I'm kind of scared to tell a doctor that my ass smells even after taking a good shower.
Anyone got advice on how I should tell a doctor this?
"Hey Doc, I got a bad smell coming from my rectum"?
Should I see a normal doctor or proctologist?

Go to your normal doctor, and if he can't do anything about it he will refer you to a good proctoligist. Some health insurance policies require you to get a referal anyways.

As to how to tell your doctor, trust me, they have heard weirder crap. For example,

http://aprilwinchell.com/multimedia/
Scroll down to special x-rays.

I think saying,"Well, Doctor So-and-So, I've noticed that, lately, a very bad smell has been coming out of my behind, and it won't go away," is a lot less embarrassing than saying,"Well, Doctor So-and-So. I somehow managed to get a jar of Grey Poupon in my rectum..."

Okay,

Here are some very embarrassing questions but I think I found the right place to ask them!!!

1. Wiping Your Butt in the Shower

I don't do this because I never knew what I should be using...seriously! I don't want to use a washcloth, I would have to throw it away afterwards...I can't imagine using it again.

Rubbing a bar of soap all up and down the crack sounds good in theory but then I have the same problem...what the frick do you do with the left over bar of soap? Do you keep it...do you later wash your face or chest with it? Yuch!!!

So...this leaves hands and covering the hand with suds...is THAT the recommended cleaning procedure?

Why the frick don't I know this stuff??? 'Cause no one ever told me is why....

2. Number of wipes until clean? Flushes?

How many wipes and flushes on average does it take for you until the toilet paper comes up clean...no signs of shit? For me it is somewhere around 10 or 13 which comes out to about 5 flushes. People always ask me why I flush so much....low flow toilets is why I tell them but that's only part of the answer.

3. Can you smell your own ass stink?
I mean without resorting to tricks like farting under the sheets...I don't smell anything on myself but I suspect others do and it makes me freakin' paranoid.

Ladies, can you smell your man with an ass-stink problem with his clothes on? Has he ever walked by you and you could smell the debri in his ass crack?

4. The Yellow Stain

Why do we men dribble? After taking a piss...I wiggle it, rotate it, throw it over my shoulder and then shake it twice more just for safety but still my underwear reveals a problem.

I admit to having worn piss-stained underwear...how the heck does that happen? I am not pissing on myself but then again I must be....Ladies, what percentage of men do you think are wearing yellowed underwear right now?

Slowly bring bran into your diet and increase weekly. After a month, you will be having easy wipeless shits. This should fix your problem.

Yes, the answer is a bidet. Americans seem to be totally ignorant of this device that is so common through much of the civilized world - we walk around with unwashed asses and wonder why we stink!

You can order a simple bidet attachment for $80 bucks from TushyClean, I think the name is. For those who don't know anything about bidets, take a look at http://www.mybidets.com/bidet-history.html

Tallman

ASS IS ASS AND WILL SMELL LIKE ASS NO MATTER WHAT!!! NOW DOES IT SMELL LIKE REGULAR ASS OR DIRTY ASS??

Take a toilet bowl brush, a bucket and bottle
of rubbing alcohol and Ram for home! Or you
can take the wimpy way out and insert a baby
lotion bottle and give a few pump then liqued
soap dispenser. Scrub thoruoghly-rinse-repeat.
garden hoses great for rinsing.

Actually I don't know cuz...
My shit don't stink. ... Smells like petunias.

Use A Big Butt Plug .

Hahaha! You stinky arsed fuckwits! Youre asses stink ause you can' be fucked cleaning them! Wipe and shower properly, and then if it still continues, get some medical helpd. But please, for everyone elses sakes, WIPE YOUR ARSE!!!

God, This was better than the sunday papers...and even helpfull! I havent laughed this hard in a while...y'all keep it clean. Peace. From the Florida east coast. I liked the baking soda one...it does work for cats...yadda...

DON'T scrub your ass with a washcloth and soap. And don't spray it with perfume or cologne. If you do this on even a semi-regular basis, you will get an asshole that itches AND smells bad. The asshole is very sensitive. Toilet paper is one thing...terrycloth and soap are another. I use my bare hand with some soap on it to gently cleanse my ass when I take a shower. None of this "scrub it clean" nonsense. I learned the hard way: if you scrub your asshole with soap and water, you are asking for uncomfortable times in chairs. And for the record, I wash my hand thouroghly after I clean my ass with it in the shower. I hope this helps someone; I know this thread is old but I had to get my two cents in.

Instead of scrubbing your butt with your hand, you could put some baby soap (its gentle) on a baby wipe (Huggies wipes are very soft) and gently scrub your bum that way.
The worst that can happen is your farts will smell like baby wash.

I've noticed that stinky butt gets worse when I am stressed. Normally I keep myself clean so it doesn't stink, but when I'm stressed it stinks no matter how I clean, wash, or deodorize it.

well now this is sure a switch in the norm ,,,try a wet washcloth an worm soapy water then pat yourself dry afterwords
may want to change your diet as well

an to the dude munchin diet stuff that may be that cause of your problem but see a dr first

I havent laughed so freakin hard in a long time this is the funniest shit ever.

My ass stinks too. The reason is because I wear my underwear for two days. On the second day, I turn the underwear inside out and wear it a second day. this way I save water on the cleaning bill. If it gets too rank, I drop my pants and throw my underwear out.

Shaving your ass makes it stink less, I've discovered.

Ive had this damn problem for a good year and a half to two years now, and it is really getting to me. I feel like i have no real friends. Im doing horrible in school because i cant concentrate on anything but that f*cking smell (I HATE THAT F*CKING SMELL, JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE). Please dont tell me to "wipe my ass untill the paper comes back completely white", because I do. Every morning before school, i shit, then i get in the shower. I use soap and a washcloth, and i clean EVERYTHING for a good 5 minutes. When I get out of the shower I usually feel clean, but after first or second period I f*cking reek of this shit/body odor smell. Should I shave my ass? Use deoderant? Im f*cking desperate here....because of all of this f*cking sh*t ive become very depressed, and im seeing a counsler. Sometimes I feel like life isnt worth living and this will never end. THIS SUCKS HELP PLEASE.

Yalls stories are great. But my story is even greater cuz it's about the one and only MY BUTT!!! Anwayz i was taking a shit the other day and when i was forcing the shit out and i realized that i felt a burning sensation coming out of my asshole. You know how you eat very hot spicy spicy chili and it burns your mouth?? Yea well imagine that coming out of you asshole 20x worse... It is not the greatest feeling in the world i can tell you that much. I usually tell my friends to EAT DA BUTT!!!! And one time i walked around school with a spoon out of my ass crack out of my pants telling everybody in the hallwayz to eat my butt... And i went on the morning announcements on TV and said eat da butt with a spoon hangin out of my ass... EAT DA BUTT!!!! It was great.. only i was suspended for 10 dayz and charged.. haha.. eat da butt

My Husband says his butt smells like a gyro sandwhich. Like lamb. Sounds pretty disturbing. I never smelled it. Though, I'm curious. Honestly after reading this site on smelly butts, I never thought men's butt stink. I'll tell you this. I'll never eat another gyro as long as I live.

Go on a diet of Bud and egg salad for two weeks. Eat nothing else. After you realize how bad it CAN BE, maybe you (and whoever is around you) will be happy with your "normal" odor.;]
BTW.....don't fart around open flame sources during this diet...!)

Love the comment Mott the Poople. Brilliant!!!!

One thing I've learned over the years is that you can unintentionally contribute to the "ass stink" even AFTER you shower by the actual way you clean your ass with soap while you're IN the shower. I Have a shower head with an extension and in the morn. when I shower, I squat down to rinse my ass after I soaped it up, so the shit doesn't run down my thighs. Hair on my legs (I've found) retains smells really well. Also I wash my ass right after I wash my hair and face, then I soap my legs and ass again to remove any trace of smell. I also make an effort to shit in the morn. THEN shower, not the other way around, in order to be fresh and clean all day. I found this to be good. I have to be really anal about smell because I never wear underwear (overratted).

Hey it's Da Butt Man comin at ya with "DA BUTT NEWS"...Today on "DA BUTT", i got hair in the atmosphere and very hairy, sweaty pimples. I also have hemroid fever. Anwayz, moving on to the story, a few days ago i was on the toilet taking a mondo monster ass shit. Must of been the whole bucket of spicy shrimp i had eatin. Anywayz with my asshole burning once again, i noticed that all of a sudden the shit had stopped coming out. I felt that i had to shit a whole lot more and i kept pushing and pushing, but nothing came out. So, i figured i was done. I pulled up my pants , flushed, washed my hands and went on about my business. Well i say bout a couple of hours later i was in the living room teasing my little annoying sister. Trust me, she's annoying. Anywayz she pissed me off to the point where i was about to explode. So i decided to give her a stink face rikishi style , you know the guy off of wrestling with the huge stank ass. Well, come to find out i did explode. I had the sudden urge to fart, and when i did, shit exploded all over her face. It was great. She was crying with shit all over her face, smelling like rotten ass shrimp. I was on the floor laughing my ass off with my pants down to my knees lol. Well that concludes my story and thankyou for tuning in to "DA BUTT NEWS" and this is "DA BUTT NEWS" signing off saying EAT DA BUTT!!!!!!!!!

Ya'll could be suffering from Trimethylaminuria.
It's a metabolic disorder caused the certain foods we eat.

A quick "Google" search should yield lots of info.

Basically foods containg CHOLINE, LECITHIN, AND SOY should
be avoided, as these ingredients/properties whatever are
unable to be metabolized properly due to the liver lacking
a certain enzyme.

As for day-today hygiene use an exfoliating LIQUID soap.
"Dial Renew" is a good brand. Fuck a washcloth; all you need is your
hand.
I would take at least two showers after a bowel movement, 'bout 30
min. apart.

1) Try to have a bowel movement once a day.
2) Try to reserve your bowel movements for nighttime, before bedtime (to avoid a day of self-conscious social interaction.)

I will be here.

Hi shitsters

Had the same problem for a few years. Try this product:Herbal Fibreblend, by a company called Aim. Best suppplement I ever took. Cures constipation and makes your stools solid if they're messy and u gotta wipe alot.I don't eat any fibre, I just take this shit once a day and my stools are formed really well.I'm pretty sure that it improves the stench, from peoples reactions. It works straight away too.I noticed with other forms of fibre,they take a while to be effective and alot of them make you fart more.This stuff is awesome, and doesn't give you gas.It's all herbs. Type it into google and read some testimonies. I know I'll be on it for life. Try it and tell us what you think

This is Da Butt Man comin' at ya once again with.. "Da Butt News". Today on Da Butt, we have a hemroid popping up in the upcoming week. We also have some major swamp ass so be prepared for the worst. It's gonna be a hot, sweaty, humid ass so be sure you have air conditioning. Anywayz moving on to my story.. It started back in the 3rd grade. I was known as "The Fart Master 2000". My farts were known to drive the whole crowd in the cafeteria away. My farts were stinky, wet, loud, and very entertaining. Anywayz i was in math class acting really retarded at age 8. I had this huge fart building up, o my god it was so big it was rupturing my stomach. Take in mind earlier that morning before school i wasnt feeling that well. So i pushed the fart out and it was loud and very very very wet. I mean it was really wet i felt hot shit coming out of my ass. So i went to the bathroom, pulled my pants and my underwear down and found this huge pile of shit about the size of cow dung in my underwear. Take in mind these were still my whitey tidey days. So i took my underwear off and threw it on the bathroom floor, i took a shit, wiped my ass, cleaned myself off and went about my day. The next class everyone was talking about the shitty underwear in the bathroom. It was so great. I became a legend in that school to this day, only nobody knew that it was me..... But people are still saying to this day... "I wonder who's Shitty underwear that was....." That concludes this story and if you excuse me, i got to go hose off my ass cuz it needs cleaning. Thanx for tuning in into another exciting edition of "Da Butt News".. This is Da Butt News signing off saying EAT DA BUTT!!!!!!!

i smell like shit. i think sometimes worse than others. i used to have dreads so i thought it might have been them. it wasnt. i get theses things sometimes called tonsil stones that come outta the back of my throat. when you crush them they smell like shit. i dont know whether it's my ass or nasal cavity that smells. but for the past year and a half i've been getting the whole "something smells like shit", "someone shit themselves", "something smells like a rotten shit and garbage buttshake". etc :(

I just eat a bunch of bananas and green apples and cereal. After about 10 farnts, it stops smelling no matter how hard u try. The bowels also stop smelling!

One word folks, WASHLET

Happy trails,
L. Wrong
Chairman & CEO, PPK Industries

To those of you who have the "stink" going on, often, it is not your fault. Many of you have offered some great advice. Along with other measures, try cleaning the area lightly with hydrogen peroxide.

I once had a hair that infected my belly button, the stink was horrid! My mother, who is also a nurse, had me clean it with hydrogen peroxide. It cleaned out the infection. I have never had the problem since (33 years and still no problem). I use it for my mouth (mixed with water)and other parts of my body. The stuff works, period. But use it wisely.

Good luck!

i know my ass stinks when i pull the ole shorts down to jack off the smell of my ass will give me a headache

Necrotizing bowel could be the problem. Let me know if you're dead in 12 hours.

I think I got this ass smelling problem but I don't know...EVERY SINGLE time when I'm around people, they kind of sniff, fake cough and they have this face like "ughh you smell". I guess they're trying to fan away the smell comming out of me or something...But anyways, and I take a shower at least once a day, every single day. After I take a dump, I use toilet paper and wipe my ass but after that, I put lotion on toilet paper then wipe my ass a few more times. It gets rid of the shit really good but people still act weird around me like I smell bad but I don't smell anything...I've tried everything including taking a shower every day and washing my ass crack, buy new clothes, use febreeze, etc...This shit has been haunting me for 6 years now man...

Shave your ass and improve your diet. That should doo it.

SamDamnit!
Rectum Rector
of
The Church of Poop
http://groups.myspace.com/THECHURCHOFPOOP

Why does my shit smell not like shit? It smeels....well, I can't even say what? Just not like shit? It's been going on a while and nothing else seems wrong. Just smells weird.

Baby wipes (or wet wipes) are good for in between showers. I'm a chick so I put deodorant (not up there) but on the sides of my private. Inside of my legs. So you won't get as sweaty. And if you feel gross down there try NOXZEMA on your crack. And then use a baby wipe to take off.

This is the single most disturbing forum topic I have come across in the history of my reading shit (pun intended) on the web.

Yeah, liquid is the way to go. Either baby wipes or bidet.

My ass used to smell to hell until i began using baby wipes. I was mad fun of all the time it was terrible.

Smelly Ass is due to everyone taking showers and rubbing their shitter, the arse is not used to this, so goes into overdrive to get the germs back, they are supposed to be there. do dnot rubb them off

In my experience, there are at least three kinds of butt stink.

The first is the obvious one, the one smells like shit itself. I rarely smell this from anyone--if so, it probably means they didn't wipe well.

The second is a more diffuse odor that is a little bit like bad breath. I smell this one fairly often, and unfortunately it's the one I have, unless I take care to use some type of wet wipe (baby wipe or tp moistened with rubbing alcohol) after every time I poop.

The third (the worst, IMO) adds bad breath plus a strong overtone of something cloying that I still can't ID. It may be a combination of anal fluid and something else; I don't know what that overtone is but this is by far the worst. And this is the one that gets transferred to upholstery, GAG.

I just applied three doses of Simple Solution (buy this at pet supply stores) to try to get the stink out from where an in-law sat on a chair. He drove for two days, probably without taking a shower during that time, and apparently didn't bring a change of jeans or (ugh) even undies. I don't want to say anything to him, but JEEZ MAN, CHANGE YOUR UNDIES AND JEANS EVERY DAY!

When my husband asked what I had done to that chair and why, he got a funny look on his face and said, "He has had that problem before" but became terse and defensive when I tried to find out what he meant by that.

The real problem is that the guy also sat in my husband's car (the seat where I normally sit), and I know he won't bother to de-stink it. He's gonna get a REALLY strange look on his face when I start putting layers of paper towels on it before I sit there...

Hey me shitty mateys! I have the usual bad smell emanating from my butt hole, just like the rest of the cats on this thread. Upon reading all you guys (and girls) I came to the conclusion as to why I have that horrid rancid onion smell from my nether regions; when I take a shit I DON'T expell all of the fecal matter that is in my bowel. I have taken up to THREE shits a day and there is still a residual stool/smeary poop in my passage. I CAN'T get rid of this! Barring risking a serious case of piles. I then bath/shower and use a full role of TP. For a couple of hours I smell fine, but, having sat on a heat retaining surfaces (seats etc) or a run of the mill movement (ie walking etc) I can even FEEL the anus compressing the shit and then the smell is transfered to my pants etc. I sum up; the ONLY way to have a fully clean ass is to get rid of ALL the shit in your butt. Otherwise you are pissing in the wind. I would then summarise that a heathy diet is the way to go. But even with this in place I STILL CAN'T GET RID OF ALL THE SHIT! WE are all doomed to a shit smelling existance.

Clean Pee-Pee, you are nuts!
Who in the world would be stupid enough to put noxema in their ass?! That would burn your poor, stinky anus.

Just go with the shea butter and/or aloe Huggies baby wipes. They smell good and clean effectively.

This is too funny..do yo people have jobs..my ass doesnt stink and my coochie doesnt have cheese on it around it or in it.. how about them apples?? :)

About that stink type #3: I strongly suspect the nauseating overtone comes from too much yeast (specifically, beer). The guy I described drinks a lot of beer, and now that I think about it, the overtone does have a yeasty touch, yeasty-gone-really-nasty. Not gyros. Not onions. (Though I know those butt smells, too--they happen when I actually eat strongly spiced foods. Then again, my skin also exudes onion and garlic if I eat those.)

I hate butt stink, mine or anybody else's. That's all there is to it.

I'm totally stoned and this message board is making me ROFL but I'm actually learning a lot too. I've read nearly all of the posts and I took diligent notes. I'm particularly intrigued with the Brazilian bikini wax. Regarding the original question about persistent ass stink, I think all of the above comments hold some validity. I would emphasize that pheromes as someone mentioned is a significant part of human stink, especially in the groinal area. If you still believe that your shit is what is causing your ass to stink, then I reccommend drinking at least two cups of green tea every day. Some researchers claim green tea neutralizes the smell in our feces. There is also a product called Sphincterine Minty Ass http://www.mintyass.com/ .
It is designed to make your ass smell minty fresh. Give it a try!

It's your diet. You shouldn't even have to wipe if you are eating correctly. If you find it difficult to eat right, then take a daily supplement of laxative. This will make your shit come out the way it is supposed to, smooth and clean. I only have to wipe for assurance purposes, but even with just one swipe there is nothing there, whether I wipe front to back or vice versa. My ass is showroom new even after a large dump. You could eat out of it!

Try a kotex between your cheeks to absorb sweat. Or some Toilet Water perfume. P.S.

Are you cut or uncut? Maybe it's your penis that stinks. Lots of guys who are uncut don't clean inside the foreskin well. It can smell pretty nasty when left uncleaned.

Step one: Your colon must be completly empty or orders will emenate from your backside.
2.You must remove ALL body hair for proper hygiene-legs,underarm,perianal,ALL BODYHAIR!
3.(1.)SHIT,SHOWER,SHAVE IN THAT ORDER.
You can not shave after you shit even if it's been a while as you run the risk of infection and you contaminate the shaving device as well.
4.You can shower again after you have completed the process however.
5.Purchase soap containing witchhazel or teatree oil. Or purchase these items outright in oil form. wash yourself without the use of a washcloth as they just transfer orders back on to you after being used once, even after being washed smell a washcloth and you will still notice it contains a least a faint smell, when wetted the smell becomes stronger.
This also applies to your bathroom towel.
Change it out every second shower.
-Shave your nose hairs as well and clean inside your nose daily.
4.diet-no wheat,fast- food, meat, spicy, pungent, ect. Read Dr.perricone's book, the perricone promise.
5.Apply lotion to your body after showering. I recommend Lubriderm, curel or lotion containing oatmeal.
6.Make sure your feet are perticured.
7.Drink 2 litres of water a day. 30 before or after any meal, not while consuming. Drinking while consumming a meal prevents good digestion. Yogurt creates the types of mucus that promotes healthy digestion. Fruits and veggies are also a must.
8.keep washndry packets in your pocket and use the after deffecating. wipe using toilet paper first, then use a small amount of liquid soap applied to some toilet paper and wipe. Then wipe dry, after this apply the washndry towelet. Pat dry whithout wiping to prevent breaking skin. Apply a small amount of lotion to the same area, enough to be obsorbed without leaving a moist residue or this will cause you to sweat from your backside.
9.Overeating keeps the colon from ever being completely empty so keep this in mind as waste will otherwise back up and remain in the colon causing oders to eminate. Space four hours minimum from last meal.
10.Excersise three times a week.
11.Also try shower before bed.
12.Try appling a small amount of body oil.
13.I can't imagine that anyone could have a problem after following these guidelines.

You need to clean your arse hole with water//////////////////////// you idiot

Hey Change you life, nice to see someone put so much thought into the subject matter unfortunately you lost all credibility by spelling odor (or for us Canadian folk odour), order. Let that be a lesson to you kids out there, poor spelling and grammar will get you nowhere...ok, 1600 Pennsylvania Ave notwithstanding.

Hi

I have a serious problem, I smell like shit after 2 hours out of the shower, I Have used atleast 20 different types of soaps and i still stink, What do i do????????

Please someone tell me what soap to use or Tell me how 2 clean it, My girlfriend gives me head but Can barely stand the smell of my ass

SOME1 HELP PLEASE

All moslems wash their ass, so does the French
thats how you keep you Anus clean, wet the toilet paper after you wiped it with dry paper and keep on cleaning even a quarter of an inch into the anus, don't eat pork, jesus Christ did not eat pork because the Pig eats its own and other pigs Poo, Anal sex is also the cause of poo smelling it stretches the anus rectum and the Rectum will not absorb some of the toxic poo, Yes eat non meat will also stop the smell You know meat and chicken and pork does not digest in your stomach like vegetables its stays there and rots to help to remove the meat you have to eat brown fibre bread.

sometimes when i do a sloppy poo the poo water bounces up and hits my bum and sometimes back up into my anal cavity, do you think it was jsut a big poo or that my bum is thirsty?

I had the same problem. The way to fix it is to change ur diet and use baby wipes. Also, a little deoderant around ur ass, not in it, will help keep sweat out of the area and keep u cleaner and smelling better. Also clense in shower, there is nothin else to it. I had this problem for a year, but now i have fixed it with these steps, try it yall, it works.

Detach your ass and put it in the washing machine. Gain gets odors out of anything, or so they claim.

i have a question.. say if you need to take a shit at bad times and you had to go bad but then not anymore.. well what if you force it out when its at the edge.. is it bad for your system? will you damage anything while forcing it out numerous of times?
-thank you

TSV wrote (over two years ago):

"Okay, girls. Here's a question for you. I do not normally have a crotch that smells fishy as I do tend to bathe and practice good hygiene habits. However, every time I go to a seafood restaurant I end up with a fishy-smelling bum. It doesn't matter if I scrub it with wet wipes, shower, soak in a tub, change my pants, or wash my crabby hands before wiping. It still stinks for about a day afterward. Anyone else have this problem? If so, what do you do about it? I've tried all my usual techniques and nothing works. It's really nasty, man!"

For once, Dr. Dumpster can offer some help, in the very simple form of lemon juice. Use some on the fish when you are eating the seafood (notice how it gets the smell off your hands?), and if your cooter smells bad afterward, put some lemon juice in your douche!

This works the same way tomato juice does to neutralize skunk odor.

And, since this is in response to my dear, dear friend TSV, I will have to conclude with a somewhat misogynistic joke:

God meets Adam in the Garden of Eden. "Adam, where's Eve?" asks God.

"Oh, I left her skinny-dipping in the lake," says Adam.

"Damn," says God. "Now I will NEVER get the smell out of all those fish!"

I sympathize with each of you and the problems you are facing, but I don't think that each of you are experiencing the same distinct problem. I agree that a shower and washing that poop-smear away every so often could do some of you some good; but I think others of you are suffering from some sort of bacterial infection - especially if you feel an itching and burning sensation down there. Infections oftentimes product a stink. My advise is to consult your physician. Even others may have the anal leakage.

use talcom powder it works very well use it.

I know this guy who was practicing for an alternative circus and so once shoved a candle up his ass whilst doing a hand-stand. No one was around at the time and he fell, bumped his head knocking him unconcious, but the candle was still burning! Anyway, eventually, he woke up (probably cozza the pain) and the wax had melted, dripping right up his ass and into his bowel.

No one believed him when he told us when one day, just right out the blue, he doubled-over in pain like his stomach was being ripped apart from within. Next thing we know he's dropping his trousers IN THE STREET - bursting for a shit. His face looks like its gonna explode, all red roar with strain - then suddenly something drops out of his ass, and I shit you not...

...it's a candle, still alight, and it has a real face and a huge dick - and it just looks at us all like we're pieces of shit and says, "Sure is dark in there." Then he falls over, dead.

It was fuckin' weird, man.

Has this ever happened to anyone else?

Ive got the answer after going to the bathroom Immediately get a shower use soap and water. that is what I do and I never have a problem.

i smell like ass and everybody around smells it to.im not sure were its coming from. whether its my gooch ormy ass crack. What can i do to stop the smell.

Body odors are nature's pheromones. Underarm odor, groin odor, yes even ass odor are all love potions. When I come home from the gym still unshowered my girl can't wait to go down on my root. Girls still need to wash though, guys can't take the stink.

This page is hilarious. It's really late right now and I have to stifle my laughter in an effort not to wake up my housemates.
I especially enjoyed "Da Butt Man"s tales of debauchery.
I too am familiar with the stinking of the rectum. Many factors can contribute to the increase or decrease of this affliction.

I find that pork products stink more, ice cream tends to stink less. Eat your vegetables. Eat some fiber, bitch!

Personal hygine is a must. Shower, shave, do whatever you have to do. If you used to stick your thumb in your ass when you jacked off as a 17 year old loser, you'll probably have to do it again. You are most likely known as a "dragon storm kid" and people laugh at you behind your back because you are secretly gay. Don't ask about it, just do it. Foreign objects can be a big problem as well. Get yerself a steel toe dildo. Better fill that puppy in. Keep the moving parts clean. Use vaseline. And for the ultimate luxury, clean it up and later on, after you're clean and smiling, use some "man glue".

Astringent is useful for the pimpley areas on yo' ass crack. Wash yo' stinkin' ass.

I like the way my ass smells when I hike up my balls... it smells awesome, like straight balls, dude. Ain't nothing like it.

Ever hear of using ashes? This is risky.... better to use 'em on a distended pooper, but don't lose your head.

If all esle fails, you can always move to Las Vegas and play in a shitty rock band, or become an actor. Go on Letterman. Shine ass, baby!!!

Root Guy, I can't stand smelly guys. You're fooling yourself if you think we girls ENJOY your body odor. Blech!

_______
Broccoli!

[B]ody odors are nature's pheromones. Underarm odor, groin odor, yes even ass odor are all love potions.

I suppose you and two million neanderthals can't be wrong. Love Potion Number Nein! Soon coming to you in your favorite department store...

Brilliant comment Bunghole, this is the kind of guy that thinks Davidoff makes a cologne called "Stoolwater", the preeminent eau de toilette. Possibly he's confused that Adidas cologne is short for "All Day I Dream About Stankass". Either way, not one of the more popular guys on the dating circuit.

TSV writes: "[F]or once, Dr. Dumpster can offer some help, in the very simple form of lemon juice. Use some on the fish when you are eating the seafood (notice how it gets the smell off your hands?), and if your cooter smells bad afterward, put some lemon juice in your douche!"

I've got a better solution--Dig out those stainless steel Ben Wa's, baby!

_______
"Odor in the court! The judge is eating beans--his wife is in the bathtub counting submarines." Author Unknown

Holy cow Bunghole, I saw those things in my ex's closet and thought they were deep sea fishing weights, excuse me while I make a phone call.

Bunga, those may come in handy on your next fishing trip. You know the adage, 'Fish of a Feather....' Well, you get the idea

_______
"Odor in the court! The judge is eating beans--his wife is in the bathtub counting submarines." Author Unknown

This is embarrassing but how do I get the brown stain out from around my anus? I've tried scrubbing hard (ouch) When I am "fooling around" with my boyfriend, i get all embarrassed. How come girls in porno's dont have it? HELP!

Dear Anonymous Coward (not verified): A soft-bristled toothbrush with a little warm water and mild soap shouldtake care of your problem. You query: "[Ho}w come girls in porno's dont have it?" Answer: They have make-up artists that really clean up.

_______
"Odor in the court! The judge is eating beans--his wife is in the bathtub counting submarines." Author Unknown

The brown ring around the anus is your natural skin color. Some are darker than others. Porn stars have them bleached. Just keep it clean and live with the color.

_______
"Rectum hell, killed em' both." Author Unknown

RD: Missed you the last coupla. Regarding your post: a little information can be a dangerous thing--(cite your bleaching reference above). You need to counter with caveat about not "trying this at home with household liquid bleach". A quip and 'keep it clean' is always a safe bet.

Where I come from we don't worry about cleaning our assholes. We just elect them to Congress.

_______
"Say, has anybody seen my sweet Gypsy Rose Volcano?"

damn yo ass is fucked up dude

anal incontinence-who has it? i sure do, had it for 10 years now. its real fun, drove me to a cocaine addiction i cant quit cuz if i do whats left? go get a job where everyones rubbing their nose and giving me dirty looks and talkin about me behind my back?truth is the only thing i have is family but i dont talk about my problem, i think it may be a 10 or 11, on a scale 1 to 10. i found out how i got it today tho. car accident 10 years ago, i broke vertabra and pelvis bone. now my ass leaks and so does my johnson sometimes. whoopy what a wonderful life, well i have a little up left so ill go do it before i lie down, think for hours about why i smell worse than the bum on 3rd ave. and do the same tomorrow. later

I agree with all who state the obvious: Your diet controls what your ass smells like. This may be true for some, but not for all. For as long as I can remember, my farts have smelled worse than anyone elses. There is a line you cross with your friends, when your bros stop laughing. I don't even get this line. I get the serious look when they inform me "you're really fucking sick, you know that" and chicks tell their boyfriends they don't want to come to my apartment because it smells like diapers. I don't beleive my apartment smells like butt, I use febreeze all the time, but the driver side seat cushion in my truck has a fierce odor you can detect when you open the door. When the A/C comes on, your face gets ass-blasted by the vents. Its really embarassing some times because that kind of shit is just going too far. Sometimes when I wake up after a night of drinking, my whole room smells foul. The aura just leaks out at night. Tell me thats not fucked up. Working out at the gym is also difficult. I do my best to remain anonymous and pass off the blame, but people just start to recognize you. Especially on the treadmill, you can't escape that shit no matter how fast you run. I really don't fart alot, its just such a warm, concentrated dose. I've tried alot of things, even no red meat/fish for a week, but nothing really helped. I guess I just needed to "vent". Do me a favor and be thankful the next time your friend laughs when you rip one. Its nice when you can laugh without stinging your nostrils.

AC of 04.04.2006: They make adult incontinence diapers. Also, it wouldn't hurt you to ease up on the hooch, although I can see why a person would drink if they were leaking out of both bottom holes.

Cosby Curdle: You need to look into "Under Ease" charcoal-filtered underwear. Designed specifically to "remove ass gas before someone walks into it and either stops their heart, ignites the sheets or both," this product sells for only $24.95 a pair, and replacement filters are only $9.95 (doesn't say how often you have to replace). Do this for the ones you love!

Dumpster-- Do they make those for people's mouths? There's a few folks at work that I'd like to have fitted for them.....

I learnt this when I was posted in Saudi Arabia during the 1991 Gulf War. Wash your ass with water (soap is not necessary, but may be used) instead of using TP. It'll save trees, and your ass will not smell anymore.

Hilarious stuff.Try not eating and then weld your spider permanently.Alternatively, ram a plastic tube up your Tonto, attach the other end to a convenient pocket sized bottle,(plastic to be on the safe side, don't want glass shredding your serpent!) fill the bottle with baking soda and water, fit a valve half way along the tube and fit a rubber bulb. Then you can give yourslf an enema at any time of day.The only drawback to this is that your shoes will be filled with anal water and your feet will smell like ass! So,....best find another solution,...sorry!

I dont believe that other people had the same problem as me.I am not english.i was really surprised.It was really torturing for me because i was embarassed to go to the university lessons coz i knew someone would say ,someone stinks..it got a phobia to me for along time..Now i dont have it anymore, but i havent done anything.I think it must have been an infection and the only one to trust to tell yu what to do would be a proctologist and not silly tips for how to wash..

I had quite a few of the problems posted above.

But then found out that it was my computer chair! Since I play computer quite a bit (1-2 hours a day) I fart a lot in the single chair I have. When I sit down, it gathers all the smelly particles into my pants, and I start to stink. My suggestion is to just change your pants regularly, boxers/underwear aswell, keep your chair clean and your ass crack healthy! There is no need for those coverups, such as deoderant, cologne/perfume (the mix is disgusting) or even homebrand dishwashing liquid (We had a discussion about it and how it can harm you, but leaves you smelling good, in physical education the other week). Keep your butt clean with soap, wipe regularly (would suggest after a shower, or before and once or twice during a 6 hour period), and of course, show no mercy!

Guys - be proud of your crack, 'root' and nads. If your lady doesn't like it, she ain't worth it. Try what I have said beforehand, though. ;)

As far as ass stink goes. I do one thing every single time I poop. I mini wash in the shower. I use soap or shampoo. I rinse very well first then apply the soap/shampoo and work it really well to a good lather then rinse and repeat. Works for me and I never have to do anything else. Now if I'm not home then I use wet wipes until there is no skid marks at all (usually 3 to 4 wipes)then dry completely. It's a decent temp fix until you can get to a shower. That's for guys. As far a gals go. I gotta agree with alot of the others. The natural scent of a womans clean ass hole is super hot. I like to sniff a chicks ass hole after she has showered well, also her pussy. But more so her ass hole. The natural scent of it when cleaned is just right. Not to strong and not too weak. There is nothing quite like that special spicy smell, odor, scent. I wish I could bottle it.

You are absolutely right-I also like the smell of a nice lady´s ass-especially teens-it reminds me of the smell when somebody is sitting next to you and chewing a Big red cinnamon gum-I think this comes very close to what a teenies ass smells like-i find it great-it really turns me on-my much younger gf has a wonderful ass-and it smells like cinnamon-i´m so lucky

To "cinnamon bun". I'm "Womens clean ass hole lover" but now i'm verified so I'm "742ing". I never thought of it like that but your right, it does smell cinnamon-ee! More power to chicks cinnamon ass holes. And If you really have a gf like that. YOUR THE MAN!!

I leak all the time. Soon after I shower that sticky feeling starts to turn slippery. The smell. It peels the paint off of a wall. Any chair I sit in need to be reapolstered. A plane trip is particularly nasty. Let's put it this way, little kids never lie and they scream it all over the place. By the time I reach LA from NY the seat has a racing stripe. God help the next middle seater. Ahh, then I found a solution, virtually by accident. I was taking a healthy dump and I saw an unopened tampon on the toilet top. Sure enough, it worked. Takes a little getting used to, you know, the string and full feeling. The nice part about it is that I don't leak any more. The really wonderful part about it is that I don't even have to mess with the tampon. When I take my next shit, wouldn't you know, pop goes the weasel, it's down and out. On those occasions when I peeked into the commode to see the situation, I noticed that the tampon is poop-soaked only halfway down. What a miracle. The perfect cure to a very stinky problem.
Cheers.

try letting your girlfriend lick it(joking).
use some hand wash and mix with water gentally wipe it with the toilet paper.
or go see a doctor.

To all those with devastatingly stinky bums: I stumbled across this page and began reading. Though laughing hysterically, I did have a plethora of helpful ideas that I wanted to post. I am a woman and am no stranger to funky days (we all have 'em). To the men who have a problem with smelling bad, even after a shower-several have stated diet being an important component. This is so very true. Y'are whatcha eat. Ingest healthy foods, beverages (tons of water), don't smoke, and alcohol should be limited. Good hygiene is a must. Baby wipes are wonderful for use at the toilet. As far as showering goes, I suggest using something gentle, yet effective in the killing of bad bacteria, while retaining the good...feminine wash, baby. Yep, Summer's Eve as a body wash, or a generic version. This will cleanse and kill odor causing bacteria without upsetting the PH of your skin. Something else to try is to bathe in hot water, but allow the last five minutes to be as cold as you possibly can take. This closes pores and would allow for freshness to last. Pat dry. Do not wipe hard with a towel, as that only stimulates the oil glands to produce, which in turn will eventually become malodorous. This rule applies in the shower as well-too much scrubbing is NOT good. Use your hand, but be thorough. Use a light body lotion, always, after a shower. Alfalfa tablets found at your local health food supply are highly effective in ridding the body of odor. If recommended dosage is taken, your secretions aren't as "powerful". This takes a few weeks to kick in, but is cheap. You must also continue use, however. To the guy who discovered tampons-good idea, but over time, you will lose the capacity to hold that sucker in there. Might I suggest kegel exercises to all those that have leakage problems? Good for incontinence issues. If the particular smell of your own fecal matter is bothersome, well, that's not unusual. After defecating, in addition to just simply washing, there are numerous enemas for tub use sold at a drugstore. There are also the same type with a douche involved. Nifty contraptions. I would use this as a last resort, and most definitely, read the instructions. If all the above fail, then a doctor is truly the way to go because prescriptions will more than likely be required, and his/her scrutiny of your health is imperative. I truly hope this helps. As an afterthought, I thought I'd share that I absolutely love my man's armpits. The lingering of worn-off-almost-completely deodorant and the faint smell of his natural body odor mixed with his cologne, OMG! That is a sexy smell. Some smells truly aren't as offensive as you might perceive them to be.

Not eating certain foods is probably the best solution, but if all else fails there is a Budhist quote: "The key to enlightenment is knowing that everything is an illusion." and the second quote from me, "make everyone smell your ass until they evolve into someone who likes it, and wants their ass to smell the same as yours, however long that may take" make the bastards smell your ass, use it as an effective weapon.

try seeing a doctor..it may be a rectal prolapse(when ur rectum is stickin out of ur asshole)it will stink every tym u sweat or even if ur not sweatin in ur asscrkz when you hav that problem.

"...Anonymous Coward (not verified) -- 07.30.2006 'try seeing a doctor..it may be a rectal prolapse(when ur rectum is stickin out of ur asshole)it will stink every tym u sweat or even if ur not sweatin in ur asscrkz when you hav that problem...'"

OMG!OMG! EYE M SOFA KING WEE TODD DID!

As a woman, I have to say, my man does well with keeping his privates clean. You guys don't realize that sometimes the nether regions gather smell all the way from anus to balls when there is hair involved! Sometimes the smell clings on a bit more than you know. If my guy expects me to do duty further on down (and I don't mind going on down a bit) he shaves the path for me. Less hair makes for less smell, believe me, guys.

Criminy! I LOVE that word! It was the only "expletive" my grandma ever used. That's going to be my word of the month!

And re: your comment, may I add that my hubby is super-fastidious in that regard, too, without shaving anything. Tho' he isn't on the baboon end of the hairy spectrum, so that may prevent some of the problem you mentioned.
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Fecal Matters.

i have a problem about a yar ago my pooh started to become slightly "loose"
resulting in having to wipe my butt with loads of paper .
but over the last month or so my pooh really has started to stink badly that bad i cant stand to smell it when on the loo

it seems to smell distinctively like cat pooh

and its still slightly loose

i cant really disguss this with my wife i feel embarrased
my doctor always puts things down to a virus so forget that approach

i do eat alot of fast foods but thats been the norm for years .im not overweight 13 stone 6 foot tall.
any ideas anyone ??

oh lads as for the groin smell when sweating wash your groin in a morning then just spray it with a good quality antipersirant.
no sweat no smell problem solved

thanks

This brainy discourse has missed the key point: what matters as to effectively preventing or remediating ass smell is toilet paper technique; schools should teach this starting in maybe the third grade; how many sheets, how to fold it, how to apply (clockwide, counterclockwise, up or down, in or out) - ignorance about TP technique is the root problem; it just makes good scents.

Ok, first of all, what if you don't want to carry baby wipes around all day, or don't have a bag/purse? Public washrooms are sketchy. You don't want to get caught trying to wash your ass out at the sinks, but if you can dip into a stall, sneak out with a wad, and wet it beforehand, then head back in for the duty, it works.
But usually I'm thinking, fuck that noise, too much work, and I just write the day off as a shit-stained waste.

I like to use lots of toilet paper. None of this 1 piece business. Anything getting on my hands would be an abomination. So I do the following:

When I piss i use about 2 feet minimum for a wipe. (I'm a chick) I ALWAYS piss when I shit, can't help it, it's a goddamn mess. So for a shit, I sit down and immediately make a preliminary piss-wad. I like to fold it up all tight for the finger side, and fluffy for the wipe side, to avoid getting any on me. For shits, I make a second, longer wad, maybe 2, plus the piss wad. I never wipe less than twice for a shit, cause if I do the first wipe and it's clean.. I really don't believe or trust in that. So a second one is necessary. If it's only 2 then it's a great day. But usually it's like 3 ass wipes an one flush for a normal shit, or up to 15 wipes an 3 flushes for an abomination dump - you know - the watery kind that sprays out with tons of farts and little squares of red pepper (why is there always peppers and tomatoes in those shits?!?) and a mushroom cloud stink.

Anyway, that's how I do things. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. I don't really know why. Always shower, always wipe. Don't have bidets in North America so I let it rot sometimes.

Happy trails.

"An ass by any other name still probably smells like shit." - Shakespeare.

"Duh." - Everyone else.

WIPE YOUR ASS AN TAKE A BATH DEE DEE DEE is it THAT hard???? Did mommy not teach you proper?? i say just shove a stick of dynomite in there and light it see what happens i bet it no stink no mo

Try showering more than once a week, and try wiping more than once after shitting! Your poor hygeine is precisely why your ass stinks, dumbass.
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"Uugggghh...nnnrrrrAAaaaaarrrgg...*splash*...aaaahh."

Your ass stinks because shit comes out of it. How the hell did you expect it to smell?