Vancouver-based shit rock assemble Tard is known for its bizarre performances. But when the band played at the Underground, a Calgary nightclub on September 5, the shit got literally out of hand. Singer Jessley Willis, who strutted about the stage wearing a diaper, dug his hand into his soiled hiney, extracted a lump of crap, and flung doo into the mosh pit, instantly converting an adoring fan into a dunged-dappled victim.

An onstage brawl ensued during which the shit-faced fan and his sidekick pummeled more dookey out of Willis until his band mates succeeded in pushing the attackers off stage, where they were promptly extracted from the club. So much for shit for shat justice. The club's startled audience continued to enjoy the remainder of Tard's set at a safe distance from the stage.

A search of the Internet turned up no additional information regarding Tard, their discography, or upcoming tour dates, so your humble PoopReporter assumes demand for the scatologically oriented band is about as low as their shitty onstage antics.