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High-tech Japanese toilets are on the way!

Posted 08.14.2003 by Big Sphincter
Soon, Americans can have their very own brainy bathrooms. Toto, Japan's largest toilet maker, plans to aggressively market its products here over the next few months.

"American toilet hygiene is very archaic," said Lenora Campos, Toto's U.S. public relations manager. "But people are savvier now. Bringing computer technology into the bathroom is an emerging trend. All that's needed is education and exposure to leading-edge products for Americans to see the benefits of really cutting-edge hygiene."

Several Toto toilets feature separate warm-water sprays mounted at the perfect angle for front-and-back cleanups, as well as an oscillating spray option and a warm air dryer to perk up one's posterior.

Toilets are available with automatic lid openers. And, once the lid opens, if one continues to linger hopefully in front of the toilet, the seat -- which can be set to warm and massage modes -- automatically rises also.

When the individual leaves, the toilet automatically flushes, the seat lowers, and the lid closes. And then the power catalytic deodorizer kicks in to eliminate any unpleasant odors.

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Anonymous Coward -- 08.14.2003

Meh. I prefer the old fashined way of shitting. I dont need some $1500 quantum wormhole water closet. Regular shitters work for me.

Anonymous Coward -- 08.14.2003

Meh. I prefer the old fashined way of shitting. I dont need some $1500 quantum wormhole water closet. Regular shitters work for me.

Anonymous Coward -- 08.16.2003

I think it sounds pretty cool. Mind you, I wouldn't pay a shitload (Yes, REALLY bad pun. I know. Bite me.) of cash for one in my house, but it's still a cool idea.

Anonymous Coward -- 08.16.2003

I think it sounds pretty cool. Mind you, I wouldn't pay a shitload (Yes, REALLY bad pun. I know. Bite me.) of cash for one in my house, but it's still a cool idea.

healthy 1 (1426) -- 11.22.2006

Very innovative, but ridiculous if you ask me.

I prefer the current toilets. I'm not too lazy to flush, I don't need my ass massaged, and I don't want to pay $1,500.00 + for something to piss and shit in, when my $300.00 toilet accomplishes basically the same thing.

Shit goes in toilet, toilet flushes and sucks everything down. Shit gets washed into whatever system the individual has. Why pay $1,500.00 when

Anomalous Coward (690) -- 11.22.2006

If they automated the damn thing any more, it would eat and shit for you.
No thanks, I'll stick with my very archaic American toilet hygiene.

GottaGoGirl (2616) -- 11.22.2006

OMG. The $300 toilet MUST work well. It sucked Healthy1 right down the drain before he finished his post! Help!

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