poopreport : BMnewswire :

oxypowder

California schoolkids have buckets of fun

Posted 04.17.2006 by PooperGal
Boy, the news these days is full of stories about kids, schools, and toilets. PoopReporters will recall a water main break in Texas last week that forced a school to bus its pupils to other schools' toilets. This week we get a schoolyard tale of bathroom angst from Inglewood, California, where the principal of the Worthington Elementary School forced kids to use buckets in the classroom when they had to go tinkle or poopie.

Yup, you read it right. Buckets. As in unzip and whiz, or squat and deliver -- with all of your little buddies (not to mention the class bully) within earshot.

Turns out, according to school officials, it was all due to a misunderstanding.

To prevent the children from leaving school to participate in the immigration rallies taking place that day, Principal Angie Marquez enacted what she thought was the correct procedure for locking down the school. Apparently she didn't study the very confidential, tippy-top secret manual that only principals, superintendents and teachers get to see too closely -- because Ms. Marquez inadvertently read the directions for lockdown in the event of nuclear attack. This form of lockdown dictates that no one may leave the classroom for any reason, which means buckets must be used in the classroom to ensure that that no child gets nuked by terrorists while walking down the corridor to the little boys' or girls' room.

It should be comforting to know that, in the event of nuclear holocaust, our nation's schools have a potty plan. But in the meantime, Inglewood needs to come up with a less extreme version for the apparently more commonplace immigration-protest-rally-prevention lockdown.

Show some poop support, or make a poop retort.
Fart Poopie (1257) -- 04.17.2006

I can imagine many parents were upset about that... because people get upset about everything these days.

KeepOnCrappin (551) -- 04.17.2006

Yes, parents get upset about many things. BUt seeing as how we fire bus drivers for taking a dump on the job, we oughta fire the principal for not reading carefully.

But we could aslo get angry with the school district. Becuase I would think that a hallway (or a bathroom) would be more safe to be in instead of a classroom. No windows, more inside the building, right? But I don't think any part of the school would survive a nuke, so why don't we just let them home to their families?

_______
"KOC -- the Cool Crapper" - Rat Droppings

The Big Wiper (2245) -- 04.17.2006

This reminds me of those drills we had to participate in as schoolchildren in the 'Fifties. Not shitting you here. We actually had 'hide under your desks in case of an atomic bomb' drills. Like that would keep us from being nuked.

PooperGal (527) -- 04.17.2006

I wasn't around for the 50s "duck and cover," but we still had Civil Defense sirens in the 1960s when I was a little kid. It was like that joke about "in the event of an emergency, stick your head between your legs and kiss your ass goodbye." We had to put our heads on our desks and cover them with our arms.

But we didn't have to poop in buckets.

_______
PooperGal
"Searching for the Origin of the Feces"

Lame comment! -1 point
KeepOnCrappin (551) -- 04.17.2006

Ya know, if a nuke did hit while you were hiding under a desk and you died, I bet parents would complain that the school was not prepared for the attack.

While on that subject, a school in my area build in 1952 is rumored to have a bomb shelter and 50's rations are supposed to still be there. How 3000 students and teachers fit into a bomb shelter is beyond me, but... Of course that rumor also goes with the one about the school I usually work at- "There's a pool on the fifth floor" and it has only 3 floors.

_______
"KOC -- the Cool Crapper" - Rat Droppings

The Dumpster (2506) -- 04.17.2006

You have got to think, though--someone had already gone out and bought the buckets, which were evidently stored somewhere on the premises--or do they keep them in each classroom? And what about toilet paper? Do they have a secret supply of anthrax vaccine on hand, as well?

Another example of why the government has no business running the education system.

GottaGoGirl (2616) -- 04.18.2006

Angie, honey? Repeat after me: Eye M Sofa King We Todd Did. Now say it faster.

One would think that the principal of a school would have spent a modicom of time familiarizing his/her self with the proper procedures in a variety of situations.

When you read the words "nuclear" and "bucket" and "radiation" and "fallout" and "disaster", wasn't that a CLUE?

Now, please, repeat the line again.

The Dumpster (2506) -- 04.18.2006

Angie, you are hereby inducted into the Royal Order of Siam. Chant with me slowly the mystical incantation: "Hoewaa... Teguu... Siam"!

PooperGal (527) -- 04.18.2006

I thought the incantation was "Hoewaa...Tafoo...Liam"?


_______
PooperGal
"Searching for the Origin of the Feces"

ganja fairy (11) -- 04.19.2006

(the incantation is "owa tana siam")

the 'buckets of fun' title on this one reminded me of the supercolon that i saw at the mutter museum in philly.

some poor person had apparantly not shat for most of their short life, and their belly just grew and grew until they died.

seven pails full of shit was discovered inside of the intestines, (i didnt know that 'pails' were a standard unit of measurement!) and the colon is now a freakshow in the city of brotherly love.

PooperGal (527) -- 04.19.2006

Odd that you mentioned the Mutter Museum. I just saw a reference to it in a story in today's paper. I'd heard about it years back - a museum dedicated to cadavers and post-mortem oddities such as what you mentioned.


_______
PooperGal
"Searching for the Origin of the Feces"

Lame comment! -1 point
KeepOnCrappin (551) -- 04.19.2006

I think I saw that on a TV show about the wirdes things removed from people's bodies. (Some of the weirder were ice axes, glass, and a not fully deveoped person [in a non-transsexual male, if you can belive that!])

WE had some immigration demonstraion issues around DC a couple weeks ago. A kid got stabbed, and many kids left school.

GGG, I hope the principal is al least smart enoght to figure out what theat means. On second thought, since she can't read, she probably wont.

Hey wait. Since the principal can't read, can the parents say the school board sucks because they stuck in a retarded principal ?

_______
"KOC -- the Cool Crapper" - Rat Droppings

Lame comment! -1 point
Poopgirl (78) -- 06.25.2006


The kid have to use buckets, because the principal forgot to read the manual?! They should be fired!
Poop on!

-Poopgirl

The Shit Volcano (3740) -- 04.17.2008

Am I mistaken, or aren't principals supposed to be able to read to get the job? Reading all these articles makes me less and less comfortable about sending little Gordon to a public school in the future.

_______
Born right the first time.

Post new comment



Prove you're not a spambot: what bodily function is this site about? Four letters, begins with p...

The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly.

*

  • Allowed HTML tags: <a> <em> <strong> <cite> <code> <ul> <ol> <li> <dl> <dt> <dd> <br>
  • Lines and paragraphs break automatically.
20,000 character limit / Flood control: 60 seconds between comments and no more than 10 comments per hour

make it a brown christmas

 


About PoopReport | Advertise! | The PoopReport Press Room | Report Your Poop | Contact Dave | Copyright 2000-2008 PoopReport.com