The next great poop medium: ringtones?

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The next great poop medium: ringtones?

Posted 05.12.2006 by Dave

This recently arrived in my inbox from Harry Plopper.

Hi Dave,
I know it's a long time since we heard from each other. I have a gift for you, which I have no objection to you making available to PoopReporters for free. However, you might need to check copyright with the popular mobile phone provider, although the tune itself (Grand Vals) is so old that copyright should have expired many centuries ago.
What I can say is that the attached recording is entirely original, made with samples of Harry Plopper's bottom sounds. Yes, every sound you hear is sphincter-originated. Load this into your phone and you'll never have another miserable phone call. It is the first of a series of short tunes for telephones.

Here is the ringtone.

Harry, I haven't been this impressed since I first heard Flatulina. That big bass rumble at the end… it's poetic as it is foreboding. I don't recognize the tune, but some cursory research suggests it was written around the turn of the 20th Century, so I don't think the copyright is an issue.

Thanks for putting this together! I have no idea how to download a custom ringtone to my phone, but I'm going to figure it out. What's your next ringtone project? I think the Imperial March from Star Wars lends itself nicely to your orchestrations.

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Show some poop support, or make a poop retort.

Fart Poopie (1257) -- 05.12.2006

This is one ring tone I wouldn't mind hearing in public bathroom...

so long as they let the damn thing roll over to their voice mail, instead of answering.

GottaGoGirl (2616) -- 05.12.2006

I love that! My husband would absolutely cut off my cell account if he heard that on my phone, though. Butt it would almost be worth it! Hee.

AssBlaster2000 (1116) -- 05.12.2006

Mr. Blaster recorded a fart (not a real one, but an mp3) and put it onto his phone. He whips it out in public every so often and has fun with it. (No, not THAT, the fart ringtone!) I'm putting this one on MY phone.

Because I know someone will ask, here's how I got the damned thing onto my phone. I have yet to see if the site I used to upload it will put a virus on my phone or corrupt the software or something (yes, mobile viruses are possible, I've seen 'em) so use at your own risk. To do this you must have a WAP or Internet enabled phone and half a brain. (If you have a full brain, you'll just have your phone synced to your computer.)

On your phone, go to MobileUp.org. When it asks you for the ID code, enter 486792. Then press "download" to download the file. It takes a really long time, so you can probably download something of your own while you're waiting.

Oh, and I think that's a common Nokia ring tone from England. But I'm not sure. As for copyright laws, I don't think it counts if you add farts.

Double Flush (604) -- 05.13.2006

Copyright is off once you modify something enough. This is modified enough, and it's GREAT! Awesome work! I gotta know, did you use Audacity or Cool Edit Pro or something else? I use Cool Edit Pro myself.

_______
Practicing the ancient Chinese art of double flushing... because sometimes, a single flush just isn't enough.

harry_plopper (6) -- 05.13.2006

Hi poop appreciators.

So glad you like it... I have it on my phone and I feel compelled to let it ring for the full cycle. I begin most calls with a smile!

This piece was arranged on Sonar 5 (producer edition)s/w; Where tuning was required it was done with Roland Vari-phart technology;

The farts were collected over several days, being recorded on my phone... The music is an excerpt from Francisco Tarrega's Grand Vals, and the last 4 bars are the standard Nokia ring tone, at least here in Europe.

I'm thinking of setting up a fart bank to get a greater range of raw material. Anyone interested in making donations?

I'm also keen to improve the quality of the original audio recordings - investing in a proper condensor mic (with a poop shield) etc etc.

Harry Plopper and the Chamber Pot of Horrors

KeepOnCrappin (551) -- 05.13.2006

That's amazing.When I get a phone, I will have this be my ringtone.

_______
"KOC -- the Cool Crapper" - Rat Droppings

Cyanocobalamin (57) -- 05.13.2006

The Nokia ditty! I KNEW there was something vaguely familiar about this ringtone! Spectacular that all the sounds came from a human ass.

poo_poo_poodio (121) -- 05.15.2006

That's just great! now everytime my phone rings it leaves a skid mark in my ear.

poo_poo_poodio (121) -- 05.15.2006

Harry P, one last thing, remind me not to borrow your phone.

sharty mcfly (211) -- 05.15.2006

my favorite part of this... is that harry wants a condenser mic with a poop shield. it takes a brilliant man to note his limitations, especially concerning the almighty power the shart has to level the playing field.

GottaGoGirl (2616) -- 05.15.2006

"...That's just great! now everytime my phone rings it leaves a skid mark in my ear...."

I can't believe no one thought of that one sooner, poo poo poodio!

harry_plopper (6) -- 05.15.2006

"SHART" - Absolutely Brilliant word!

The positive feedback has got me raring to go on new tunes, under band pseudonyms like "The Above Average Shite Band" ("Pick up the Pieces"); or maybe the "Electric Shite Orhestra" ("Mr Poo Sky") etc etc.

These ideas were spurred along by today's discovery of a musician called "The Caca Man" (http://www.soundclick.com/thecacaman).

That guy is something else... A feature, perhaps, Dave?

Double Flush (604) -- 05.15.2006

Let's start our own PoopReport band! I have a synthesizer.

_______
Practicing the ancient Chinese art of double flushing... because sometimes, a single flush just isn't enough.

Lame comment! -1 point

Poopgirl (78) -- 06.25.2006

That ringtone made me poo!
Poop on!

-Poopgirl

The Shit Volcano (3740) -- 10.19.2006

Now that's taking a fart recording to a different level. I have always wanted a farting or burping sound for my ringtone. Thanks Plopper!

_______
I was a category five! Category five, I tell you! Get it right or I'll be back to PROVE IT!!!!- Katrina

healthy 1 (1427) -- 10.19.2006

Very interesting, With this feature, I won't forget to turn off my cell phone in meetings. Thanks Plopper.
_______
It's not nice to fool mother nature.