Zimbabwe citizens asked to synchronise toilet flushes

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Berkeley Breathed's Bloom County character Binkley thought of it first: Flush all the toilets at once! Of course, he was talking about all the toilets in the Pentagon, and his goal was to "create mass higgelty-piggelty," not to unblock a clogged and failing city sewer system.

In the city of Bulawayo, which is the second largest city in Zimbabwe, the sewer system is fairly, um, shitty. According a BBC report, the city's inhabitants can go without water for sometimes up to three days. These dry spells created clogs that have proved to be quite stubborn, so city officials have asked the residents to all flush their toilets at 7:30 p.m. during multiple days this week in an attempt to move some of the poop along. Well, not really asked, more like ordered; those who were found to not participate in the synchronized flushing were threatened with fines in possibly PoopReport's first ever report of reverse toilet Naziism.

While the synchronized flushing was successful in one area of the city, others are skeptical of the success of such flushing activities. "Our city leaders are a joke," one citizen stated. He felt that new sewer pipes paid for by increased city donations would be more appropriate than such toilet hijinks.

Water rations will hopefully cease to be ordered once the rainy season starts in November.

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3 Comments on "Zimbabwe citizens asked to synchronise toilet flushes"

MSG's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points

We certainly hope there is no fire that needs to be extinguished around flush time--or does Bulawayo have a city fire department? I guess this rule also means to save up the contents of the toilets--poop and all--until 7:30, so it's possible to have multiple homes with clogged toilets if several people have used them prior to flush time. That would boost plumbers' business. The possibilities are endless.

Deja Poo's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points

It makes you wonder whether the authorities at the water/waste commission had considered the effects if the mass flush doesn't clear the stoppage. I certainly wouldn't want to be one of those upstreams homes closest to the stoppage.

Yo quiero Taco Bell.

the thin brown line's picture
j 1000+ points

I love the name of the association dude's name:
Winos Dube.....cool!

Somethin' mysterious made an exit from the gift shop.