The Bottom Buddy: Helping You Wipe

// // 41 Comments
m 1+ points - Newb
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0

I have a congenital disease that has caused some of the joints in my shoulders, back and hips to fuse and become immobile. I walk funny; but apart from not being able to dance the hula or do a decent sit-up, I'm generally able-bodied. In recent years, however, as things have progressed, I've had a harder and harder time wiping my ass.

Fact is, I can no longer wipe myself from behind, as I'm not flexible enough to reach my asshole from that direction. Over the past several years, I've only been able to wipe by bending over and reaching between my legs.

A while back I started looking for something I might use that could extend my reach.












Open, insert paper, wipe, release. What could be simpler?





I found several devices on the Internet that were supposedly designed for that sort of thing, but they all looked like complicated mechanical arms with hinges and swivels and such. To me, a) they didn't look like they would work, and b) they seemed destined to get covered with shit in the process.

Then I found the Bottom Buddy.

The Bottom Buddy consists of a curved plastic handle with a golf-ball sized head at one end. The head features flexible plastic pieces that resemble the closed bud of a flower. Pry the petals apart, insert a wad of toilet paper or a moist wipe, and it's as if your arm has just grown a foot longer. Reach back (from in front or behind), wipe, and then press the release button on the handle to drop the soiled paper into the toilet.

I've been using the Bottom Buddy for about six months, and it's comfortable, clean, and does what it's supposed to do. Because it's low-tech, it's also simple -- no plumbing, no batteries, no fuss or muss. I keep it in a drawer in the bathroom and it's always handy.

I believe it's made in Korea, and can be found through a number of web-based providers of home health supplies. The price is just under $40, although it may vary by a buck or two, depending on whom you buy it from. That's not exactly cheap, but the thing is well made and won't fall apart after a couple of weeks.

I have no interest in the manufacturer or sellers of this device -- I'm just a satisfied user and thought there might be others here who could benefit. And, no, I don't know if the manufacturer is aware of the alternate meaning of the product's name.

-- Jimmy TenEyes



Editor's note: For comparison, I tracked down a few other types of assisted wiping devices. Jimmy TenEyes wasn't kidding!













41 Comments on "The Bottom Buddy: Helping You Wipe"

Tydirium's picture
k 500+ points
0
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It seems like so many of these products were designed without really thinking. Those tongs, for instance -- did they forget that people might not get a straight shot to the anus? A kink in the apeture is certainly necessary. And aren't the grasping bits of the tongs on the OUTSIDE of the paper -- and thus subject to contamination?

And I have no idea how the "short dwarf" one is supposed to work.

Judging from pictures alone, I need to get me a bottom buddy. Uh... yeah, they definetly need to change the name of this product.

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points
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The above comment reminds me of a Kids in the Hall skit where Bruce says, "What is the sound of one had clapping?"
"What is the sound of one butt cheek flapping?"

Anyway, I am a reacher-in-between-the-leg-wiper. Were I to be a stand and reach behind wiper, then this would have really helped when I hurt my back this spring.
Jimmy, thanks for the interesting product information, and I hope that you have many more years of comfort down the road. Best of luck to you.

.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

Caca Doodle's picture
m 1+ points - Newb
0
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Cool! I'm a rehab therapist, and I'll have to remember this for some of my clients! Happy wiping with your little buddy!

The Shit Volcano's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points
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Damn! That would help some of these overweight people I know who can't reach their asscracks very well. Not a crack on overweight people, just an observation. It's very difficult for this one guy I know to wipe down there and he weighs about 400 pounds or more.

I found Jesus! He was behind the sofa the whole time!

The Big Wiper's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points
0
0

Fascinating, the things you learn from being a reg on Poop Report. I would never have guessed there was a cottage industry for wiping-assist devices. Very informative report, Jimmy and Dave-O!

Pulling My Pants Down For Peace, Plop and Posterity!

anus's picture
0
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Pwah pwah pwah!

anus applause

Slim Jim Junkie's picture
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Hmm.. One hand clapping, one cheek flapping...
I remember at one website there was a contest to see who could go the longest with masturbation. Some people were literally losing their mind, so I said
"You have forgotten the sound of one hand fapping."

Tydirium's picture
k 500+ points
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Was that website called Seinfeld?

ThreePly's picture
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That thing looks more like a luxury item that I'd buy. Why should I risk puncturing the toilet paper with my hand when I can leave the dirty work up to the Butt Wand?

*Adds to Christmas List*

The Shit Volcano's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points
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ThreePly, I think Butt Wand is a much better name for this product. I might buy it if it was called the Butt Wand.

I found Jesus! He was behind the sofa the whole time!

ontheshitter's picture
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What a testimonial!

Man, I broke my right arm once, and my left ribs another time and I NEVER considered what grief and aggro would be involved in wiping ones ass.

In the rib case, the twisting brought excruciating pain; in the arm case, a right-handed guy CANNOT wipe his ass with the left! (I presume the same is true with southpaws, only reversed).

This device could be a lifesaver for someone with a chronic illness as opposed to a temporary disability.

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points
0
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Slim Jim, that's a trick question!

The sound of one hand fapping is "fap fap fap".

Wait a minute, you're a guy, you wouldn't know this!!!! Hehehe.

.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

The Shit Volcano's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points
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Unless it's low on grease. Then you hear squeak-fap, squeak-fap, squeak-fap, "my dick hurts".

I found Jesus! He was behind the sofa the whole time!

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points
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Hehehehe.

Good one.

Get that Wanker Lube out.

.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

t0x1c b4by Bug's picture
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A friend of mine was living with this guy, who was so huge that he couldn't *or wouldn't* wipe his own ass after taking a shit. He liked to leave little dingleberries on the floor for her to pick up. Glad they weren't dating....just roomies...but still...he could use that, I sent her the link to get him that for Christmas.

Cacanana's picture
0
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It's about time someone came up with a good toilet-side device for "wiping impaired" individuals...

whataboutbob's picture
0
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Is there an electric or gas powered bottom buddy available ?

Anonymous Coward's picture
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Why is it so expensive?

Anonymous Coward's picture
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I use (and love) the bottom buddy, but wish they had a smaller one that I could fit in my purse...the "Little Buddy"!

healthy 1's picture
j 1000+ points
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The Bottom Buddy looks like the best design. The bottm pictures however, don't look like very efficient products to wipe ones self with.

The price needs to come down alot, if this product is going to sell. $40.00 is outrageous.
_______
A man who farts in church, sits in his own pew.

"Two percent of the population think; three percent of the population think they think, and 95 percent of the population would rather die than think."

George Rilla's picture
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I've been using the Bottom Buddy for about 9 months and Jimmy is certainly right with his comments .The device does work very well but they do BREAK. I am on my third device. There is a weak point in the radius were the release button is located. The first two devices I had developed cracks at the top of the button depression. I think the material is too thin in that area for the amount of presure that can be developed.The manufacture only warrants the device for 30 days. How convenient.

<my name>'s picture
0
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I weigh about 400 pounds, and I could only reach my a** to wipe it (without any assistive devices) would be if my arms were as long as a gorilla's!

At the moment, I take a shower brush, turn it sideways, cover it with a baby-wipe (the large ones stay on the brush butter), and use that to reach between my legs from the front.

This works fine when I'm at home, but I can't walk around carrying a shower brush (I've never found a collapsible one to put in my briefcase), so this leads to some embarrassing "skid marks" (as my wife calls them) in my boxers!

I'm going to try the bottom buddy. I'll let everyone know how it works out.

Anonymous Coward's picture
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My Bottom Buddy just broke in half, but I love it none the less and will be buying another when I get the money. Just remember it is plastic (two halves) and it can be weakened from use.

toomuch2handle's picture
m 1+ points - Newb
0
0

I Have also used the Bottom Buddy and had it break. In looking for a new one I stumbled across The Freedom Wand. This product has worked extremely well for me. Not only is it a good toilet aid, but it holds a loofah, and a shaver. So far it has been great, and I have an extra extension so I can reach everything, if you know what I mean. Anyway just thought I would share.

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points
0
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I have found the best ass wiping device ever, I call it The "Understanding Neighbor."
_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

El Scumbag's picture
k 500+ points
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The best solution for wiping difficulties is simply to train one's dog very well. They love eating poop anyway, it's a gesture of affection, it cleans perfectly and feels rather splendid.

So I'm told.

darren knott's picture
0
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The bottom buddy seems great but could it possibly be made shorter? Please e-mail me back and let me know if at all possible.

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points
0
0

darren knott......That is a question you should ask of the manufacturer of the Bottom Buddy, not Poop Report.


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

Farking genius's picture
0
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Why doesn't someone just invent a capsule that holds a wad of toilet paper. You would take it like a regular capsule half an hour after eating. The capsule would be designed so that it breaks down just before it hits the asshole, and wipes from the inside out. Or maybe it could just explode (gently) in the rectum and shoot the shit out.

Johnnie's picture
0
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Do you know who the manufacturer of this product is? Thanks!

Lifesolutionsplus's picture
0
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The black metal device in the lower left corner is a "Tiolet Tissue Aid". The link is malformed, but if it worked would point to http://www.lifesolutionsplus.com/toilet-tissue-aid-p-139.html . We also sell the Bathroom Buddy - http://www.lifesolutionsplus.com/bottom-buddy-p-430.html and Self Wipe Tiolet Aid - http://www.lifesolutionsplus.com/selfwipe-toilet-aid-p-285.html .

Reviews are welcome! :)

BTW -- the writer does technical support for this website, not sales. I would appreciate an update on the link above, and offer the additional links for the edification of poop fans everywhere in the hopes that it will be considered adequate compensation for the expenditure of the webmasters time. Having been a nurse in a previous career, this writer has no further interest in poop, per se........

Fat Chick's picture
0
0

I have a much cheaper solution than the bottom buddy that I use. Wrap a good sized piece of toilet paper (maybe 30 inches) around a toothbrush (mostly on the end opposite the bristles). Wrap the last bit around the handle of the brush to keep it secure. Grab the brush by the bristles (securing the last bit of TP with your hand to keep it on the brush) and wipe away. If you wrap it right you won't get any poop on the brush and it works just great. You can keep a portable one in your purse or pocket for poops away from home. The only downside is using more TP than normal and therefore sometimes wasting water on a double flush, but it's a small price to pay for a clean butt. And no, I don't use the same toothbrush I clean my teeth with, and it's very discreet because no one thinks twice about an extra toothbrush in your bathroom.

broke back asshole's picture
0
0

I have to have surgery to remove the two lowest vertebrae disc in my back that herniated. my vertebrae are going to be fused together. I am looking for a extension wiper because I will have to wear a back brace for 6 weeks plus I am going to loose flexibility. There's another use for this.

Anonymous Coward's picture
0
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Due to fused spine, I've used a Bottom Buddy for years. Right now I'm on my 5th or 6th one. There is a design flaw. Eventually, the glue fails and the two halves are no longer one. When that starts to happen, a crack will appear near the slot where the release mechanism is. This has happened to every one I've had. There needs to be a better glue and wee rebars or something inside the plastic.

Anonymous Coward's picture
0
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a right-handed guy CANNOT wipe his ass with the left!
Interesting observation BUTT I am right handed yet have always wiped left handed. I think it may be a subconcious clean hand dirty hand practice.

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points
0
0

I tried it with both hands and still can't reach my ass. Damn these fucking small arms. No wonder I'm extinct.

T-Rex

Butt of the Joke's picture
l 100+ points
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You think you have it bad?Try having my massive arms,but no fucking fingers to grab the toilet paper.I have to wipe my fat ass with a tree(and get laughed at when the tree gets stuck in my crack.)

Elephant
_______
More people flush than they do wash their hands.

More people flush than they do wash their hands.

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points
0
0

I have the cleanest asshole on the planet, which is a good thing since it is right next to my mouth.

Orville octopus


_______
Dirty old men need love too!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

Anonymous Coward's picture
0
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As I googled my problem I thought I'd have no luck. I was glad to find this. Your whole site, this page, the writing, it's all so hysterical. Thanks for shitzen giggles.

Anonymous Coward's picture
0
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Oh. My. God. This is too hilarious. As someone with bad low spine arthritis the bottom buddy is probably in my future. But before then, thanks for the laughs and realization I'm not alone.

Anonymous's picture
0
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Seriously.....I do have a better solution. I wouldn't spend $40 on something that will fall apart and I like what I have better anyway. When I had back surgery, this was given to me at the hospital by either PT or OT. I have found them online at PattersonMedical.com for $12.99, plus $9.99 shipping, regardless of quantity ordered. So I'd order an extra to carry with you. These seem to last forever....mine is 9 years old now. It is a Toilet Tissue Tongs. Mine is about 9 inches long. The one I saw online is available in 12-inch and longer. I'm actually using a pair of regular kitchen tongs for a spare right now. I do prefer the ones given to me at the hospital, though, because the end that holds the tissue is bent down, as opposed to the entire thing being straight. It also has the tissue end and the handles coated in vinyl. The metal kitchen ones are a bit cold on the ass....and you can hurt yourself with them...heeheehee (only if you get carried away with the wiping and the tissue slips) Anyway, the tongs work, they last, AND they are much cheaper.