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Dirty Dining

Posted 10.27.2004 by The Big Wiper (2244)
Since getting involved with PoopReport in early 2003, I've become a pretty dedicated poop story detective. I've tracked down latrine-related leads ranging from the anal aftermath of competitive eating to men being forced to check out toilet paper for the bathroom at the public library in Decatur, Alabama. Sometimes, however, a poop story lies hidden just beneath the surface of seemingly unrelated statistics and other well-collated data and--with a little digging and extrapolating--one discovers it just waiting to explode onto the scene like a severe case of the trots.

On an October 3 broadcast of Dateline NBC, I watched in disgust and dismay as Consumer Correspondent Lea Thompson filed an extensive report chronicling the total number of critical health violations committed by America's Top Ten family-style restaurants. In her piece, a critical violation was defined as one that could make you sick -- anything from letting food sit out too long, to not washing one's hands after going to the bathroom and then serving or handling customers' food.

As someone who travels five states for a living and has patronized IHOP, TGIF, Applebee's, Outback and Chili's from time to time, I was horrified by these statistics (gathered from a survey of a hundred restaurants in each of these chains in all fifty states). One particularly horrific incident--the acute salmonella poisoning of twenty-seven year old Jen Lussow, of Vernon Hillls, Illinois, at a Chicago-area Chili's -- was so unsettling to me that it induced real paranoia about ever having the reasonable confidence to eat out in public again. That particular
Total critical violations
Waffle House594
Ruby Tuesday514
IHOP513
TGIF490
Applebee's446
Outback418
Chili's402
Red Lobster350
Bob Evans315
Denny's296
Note: Based on a survey of 1,000 restaurants, 100 from each of the 10 largest casual restaurant chains in the nation, from Jan. 1, 2003 to March 1, 2004. Source: Dateline NBC
Chili's, it turns out, had its hot water heater break down, which meant there was no hot water to wash the dishes, clean the tables, or even wash hands; but the manager kept the restaurant open anyway. As a result, Lussow was curled up in bed for days with nausea and diarrhea; through some extensive detective work, the health department later determined that the salmonella had been caused by an employee who had failed to wash his or her hands after a bowel movement. This hardly made me want to rush out and dine at any of the chains on that list.

On a recent business trip to New Orleans, a customer of mine (whom I'll call Carolyn) triggered the whole subject again. She told me about a recent trip she and her friend Patricia had taken to Texas, where they'd eaten at the #1 offender, Waffle House. Ordinarily, she explained, they do not patronize such truck stop-type cuisine, but they were starving and found themselves driving by one at the right time -- or, as it turned out, the wrong time. Within hours of eating the breakfast food there, both Carolyn and Patricia had severe food poisoning. Patricia's lasted days longer than her friend's did, but both of them spent a great deal of time traipsing back and forth to the bathroom until the tide had rolled out.

"I suspect the salmonella may have been from the eggs, because they tasted funny at the time," Carolyn revealed to me. "But we were so hungry, we ate them anyway."

I shuddered every bit as forcefully as I did when I had seen the Dirty Dining report, because I have to rely upon restaurants to feed me as I travel around on business. Although I've never been a Waffle House/Denny's-type guy, the violations cited nationally for the Top Ten chains don't inspire me to continue to patronize any of the others I've tried. Instead, I plan to do more light supermarket shopping and bring preparable food back to the hotel room, as well as frequent more upscale establishments that aren't a part of franchise chains where apparently great lapses in sanitary conditions occur.

Serious food for thought, especially when critical violations could result in such calamities as kidney failure and even death. On the sunny side (up), Ms. Thompson's report was careful to say that some of the restaurants in each chain had no violations cited at all -- but I find that really of little comfort, since it is impossible to tell by walking in what any given restaurant's track record is. And, of course, I doubt you could get a straight answer out of the average waiter or waitress with the question, "Did you wash your hands after your last bowel movement?"

According to the National Restaurant Association, it is possible to request the health inspection records from local officials for all the restaurants in your hometown. So at least you can have the facts when you're eating out in your own town.

Still -- I must resist paranoia, and be fair enough to admit that I have never had any bowel problems as a result of dining in any of the restaurant chains on that list. Perhaps I've lucked out so far. But it's very clear, both from the Dateline report and from my friend's testimony, that some of these nationally-franchised outlets could turn out to be a serious gastrointestinal disaster waiting to happen -- and, dedicated PoopReporter though I may be, that's the sort of story I'd rather not get the inside poop on.

Pipp Pooper (not verified) -- 10.27.2004

I've experienced this first hand. I have just about all these restaurants within 30 miles of my house. I have 3 Applebees within walking distance. I boycott the local Applebees. Everytime I eat there, I have literally 15 minutes to make it home before I almost shit my pants. I've actually had it so bad that I was vomiting and shitting at the same time. Ever since then, I won't go near an Applebees.

I also agree with ThreePly. There are 2 Denny's pretty close to me and they are in deplorable condition.. Although, I've never gotten sick from Denny's.

The Applebees is in excellent condition, it's only a few years old... I think whenever you eat out, in general, you're rolling the dice with colon... you never know when you're going to catch some high school kid who's back there washing dishes who decided he's not going to wash his hands after a hearty duece... That's the risk you take when someone else makes your dinner. I've never gotten the shits when my mother used to cook for me.

MuddMaker (not verified) -- 10.27.2004

I've eaten at a Waffle House once, I'll never do it again...

First Post Rules!!!

ThreePly (not verified) -- 10.27.2004

What surprises me, is that Denny's came in last of the ten listed restaurant chains. Every Denny's that I've eaten in, with the exception of San Francisco, was dirty as hell.

The Shit Volcano (3741) -- 10.27.2004

Believe it or not I'm not surprised by this report.I have seen some horrible stuff myself.

At one restaurant I was served a baked potato that someone had dropped on the floor. I assume it fell on the floor because I found three lettuce flakes, several unidentified black specks, and a foot long hair in it. I was sick for days after eating just one bite.

Another time I saw this dumb pimply kid blowing on the bottom of the pizza dough at a restaurant to fluff it up because he couldn't figure out how to toss it.

Then there was the woman who picked her butt while making some poor person's chocolate sundae.

Or the waitress whose BO was so nasty that we had to leave.

Lame comment!
anus (not verified) -- 10.27.2004

Futta futta futta futta fweee!!!

Translation: people are so nasty!

Tydirium (516) -- 10.27.2004

A more important question: are the family-oriented chains better or worse than local independents?

I'm guessing worse. A local independent restaurant is probably owned by the people who work there... meaning that the owner has a vested interest in keeping everything top notch. The employees aren't just cogs in a machine, they're important parts of the process.

At a giant chain, the actions of the employees and the management aren't really going to affect the long-term outlook. There is no incentive to do anything other than keep yourself from getting fired. There is no incentive to work hard, or stay clean, or care at all, because all you're doing is lining the pockets of a giant faceless corporation.

This is why giant chains suck -- because there's no incentive for any employee to care. Go to a small restaurant run by the owner, and 9 times out of 10 you will have a much better experience

Slim Jim Junkie (not verified) -- 10.27.2004

Intersesting points Tyridium, however, at the tiny Chinese restaurants I enjoy, I always see something screwed up.

I'm wondering how far down Pizza Slut ranked here.

Grand Master Caca (14) -- 10.27.2004

The following link provides links to Restaurant Health Inspections posted online by local Public Health Departments:

http://www.allfoodbusiness.com/health_inspections.php

My local Chili's didn't fair to well:

http://www.decadeonline.com/insp.phtml?
agency=scc&record_id=PR0303334

The Shit Volcano (3741) -- 10.27.2004

Thanks for the info, CaCa. I've wanted to take a peek for myself.

Shawn St James (not verified) -- 10.27.2004

Its not just RESTAURANTS. The real problem is shitting without washing hands thoroughly.

I notice that people think that flicking on the tap water and running some tepid water over your fingers constitutes washing your hands.

They need to be scrubbed with soap in hot water for one minute.

The Man with the Golden Buns (not verified) -- 10.27.2004

My state, Washington, isn't shown! What are they trying to hide?

still_shitting (not verified) -- 10.27.2004

at at a Denny's in Cancun once...I ordered eggs, my buddy ordered the burittos- big mistake....he was on the pot for the rest of the trip

wonderpance (576) -- 10.27.2004

that's pretty scary. i try not to think too much about what goes on in the kitchens of restaurants i go to. if i believed everything i've ever heard about what some people do to the food, and what actually goes into the food (horse meat, anyone?) and all that crap, i'd probably be too scared to ever eat out. and that would be a shame because taco bell is one of my favorite things in life! and no, i don't want to hear any taco bell horror stories. so save it!

t0x1c B4by Bug (not verified) -- 10.27.2004

*shudder* I wonder why Managers don't enforce the hand washing after shitting rule...

It's disgusting. I always feel confident to eat at Subway. Ever single subway I went to, *and I've been to alot* Each order, the worker turned, used hot water and soap to wash their hands *Or hand sanitizer if it was especially busy* and slapped on a pair of plastic gloves, made my sub, then tossed out the gloves, and repeated for the next customer. Subway is top notch for big corperations....

Turd Burglar (84) -- 10.28.2004

I don't think I've had a terrible experience, but I know that the Denny's around here is TERRIBLE. Last time I went there there were holes in the ceiling with rain water coming through. That place is run-down and dirty. I will never eat there again.

And what's wrong with horse meat? Have you ever had it? It's good. Meat is meat.

daphne (3527) -- 10.28.2004

Golden Buns,

We can check out every restaurant in our wonderful state on the internet!!!

Use Google to find health code results for whatever county you are in. In Thurston, where I am, I found all of them from the Seattle newspaper.

Good luck!

Wiper, I wish that you could do some research before you traveled. Now, I'm going to worry about you. Please be careful.

liquidy_poo (63) -- 10.30.2004

Dave, we need to institute some sort of posting rules for comments, because that last one was just unintelligible. I couldn't understand one word of it.

The Shit Volcano (3741) -- 10.30.2004

It's a nice example of how crappy the American public school system has become.

I Luv boobies (not verified) -- 10.30.2004

poopy stinks Wash your hands in HOT water

Poopula (not verified) -- 11.01.2004

The only restaurant incidents that have occured and I was aware of was this: A chimicheese dessert at Applbees had stragetically placed long blonde hairs in it. It didnt look as if it had just fallen off someone's had, it looked like a ploy of revenge. I dont remember well, as it was a year ago, but I think I took one bite before or started to cut into it before noticing it. I had the waiter take it back immediatly, and got me a fresh, hairless free one instead. If i did take a bite I didnt get sick. I've also come across SEVERAL still dirty forks at various restaurants.
Shit Volacano- How could you eat a potato with all that dirty and stuff on it?

The Shit Volcano (3741) -- 11.01.2004

Those assholes hid it under sour cream. I only ate one bite and spit most of it out.

Poopula (not verified) -- 11.01.2004

So that means that they saw that it was disgusting and dirty and STILL served it to you? what restaurant was this!?

The Shit Volcano (3741) -- 11.01.2004

Carrow's in Gresham, Oregon. They were closed for health violations later. Go figure!

PineconeQueen (not verified) -- 11.02.2004

I got seriously sick after eating at Outback in New Orleans in June. I had steak, cooked well-done. I started to get very bad cramps and liquid shits that morning and ended up in the hospital for 3 days. I had an e.coli-based infection from fecal contamination. I had a yelling match with the manager and all he wanted to do was refund my f'ing meal cost...NOT including my drink, tax, or tip.

Outback should be shut down

Poopoopeedoo (36) -- 11.02.2004

I try to stay away from most of those places mentioned. I dont like CISCO food and most of those places all taste the same because they share a common vendor...CISCO. Sure it's prepared a little differently, but it all tastes basically the same. I would much rather spend a little time trying to find a little mom & pop place; better food and cheaper prices, usually.

poop phd. (not verified) -- 11.02.2004

well, that scared the hell out of me. and i eat in chinese restaurants almost every week. thank god they are cleanly enough that i dont have to spend my happy hour in the bathroom vomiting and shiting in pain.
-plus i think my bro got food poisoning in taiwan.his diarhhea clogged up the hotel toilet. ha!

Anne H. (not verified) -- 01.05.2005

Every single Applebee's I've ever eaten at, in several states, has given me the liqui-shits. Dunno what it is about that chain.

InvisaPoo (not verified) -- 02.05.2005

No resterants ever gave me problems but the though of some of that is..strange.

Lame comment!
Adrian (not verified) -- 05.26.2005

Have you had a good, memorable poo just lately, Anne?

MR. E (not verified) -- 08.22.2005

One word on runny turds....McDonalds

Chad (not verified) -- 09.14.2005

Mr. E
I find quite the opposite from McD's, it backs me up! (except the mcchicken that turns on the ass faucet full blast)

poops (6) -- 10.28.2005

When I worked with food i would wash my hand after everything, a ciggarette, fixing my hair, cleaning off the tables, and we wore gloves when handling the food. But another thing to think about: what about the food in supermarkets? people handle that too, we really aren't safe from anything.

Bunghole In the... (432) -- 03.30.2006

And here's yet one more argument for cooking and eating at home a lot more often.

I'd be interested in seeing an updated top ten restaurant chains report citing those with most health violations/reported incidents.

Hyacinth (not verified) -- 07.10.2006

We all talking about eating in dirty restaurants, such as oh, the counter top is dirty, but, you ever think about what is worse. Hiring every Tom, Dick and Harry that came off the streets. The health system should have a Food Handlers Permit. What this means is, if you are going to work in the food industry, such as fast foods or proper restaurants they should have who ever they are hiring to get blood and chest x-ray test done. I observed a lot of things with food servers. They cough in their hands, play with their face, handle money and used that same hands to hold your food without washing their hands. A lot of times people get sick and don't know that it's the food that they eat out-side that are not clean. I am afraid of the hands. With some food handlers even if they wash their hands, they don't wash it properly. Is not that I am being too fussy. I have to look out for my health. For me, eating salad outside of my house is a no, no. Foods that are boiled or fried is okay. The heat kills the germs. But please, when you are serving, please don't touch with your bare hands.

The Dumpster (2506) -- 07.10.2006

It is even worse than you think. Check this out.

_______
Send all your money to Bilgepump, or to Dave!

GottaGoGirl (2615) -- 07.10.2006

Tydirium-- I've found that the company-owned stores are usually cleaner and better run than the individual franchises.

Dumpster-- Taco Bell, KFC, and Pizza Hut are all the same folks, right? Ick. I've had bad experiences at Pizza Hut (haven't been in 17 years) and KFC (3 years). Even knowing what I know, though, we still frequent Taco Bell.

It's probably only a matter of time.

Anonymous Coward (not verified) -- 08.01.2006

I just got bad food poisoning from Applebees!!! Bastards!!! I had gotten sort of sick from there once before but wasnt sure if it was them... this time... wow did I get sick!!! That was the last chain I ate at too, all mom and pop places now.

shitman (not verified) -- 04.27.2007

i am doing a report on health food inspections. some of the shit in washington state is soo gross i wont eat Ihop anywhere anymore. that or Happy Terryaki...way too gross. yall should check it out.

Pam (not verified) -- 06.09.2007

Oh my goodness, I also wasn't a big fan of Applebees, however I was waiting for my friends flight which was delayed, so I decided to treat my kid to fancy dinner. I rarely eat out. We went to applebees, and she wanted a steak, but couldn't deceide on what kind. We only had 1 hour to the delayed flight was due in, so I went ahead and ordered her chicken tenders and fries. Boy am I glad I did!!!! I went ahead and ordered steak and shrimp for myself. We got done in about 35 minutes. We got in the car headed to the st loius airport about 4 minutes away. I literrally broke out in chill bumps, sweating, stomach cramps, and nasuea. I almost didn't make it. I had to go in a parking garage, and find a spot to park. I sent my daughter ahead to locate a bathroom, before I went all over myself. Once I walked in I saw my friend, and yelled at her to hang on I need to go ............. I made it just in time.... That Applebees food came out of every hole I have. I never really liked Aplpebees anyway, I should've followed my feelings from the beginning. NEVER EAT AT Applebees.......please

Ambie (not verified) -- 06.14.2007

My fiance' got severe food poisoning from the Applebees in Charleston WV on 06-09-07. He had severe cramps and diarrhea. This is not the first time it has happened. It happened to his whole family a few years ago too. I will never eat there again

Anonymous Coward (not verified) -- 08.07.2007

I remember one time when I was younger my family and I went out to eat. I think it was a steak place. Just a small mom and pop operation. But anyways my mom found a plastic fingernail in her ice cream from one of the employees.

The Big Wiper (2244) -- 08.07.2007

Yum! Press-On Ripple!

Pulling My Pants Down For Peace, Plop and Posterity!

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