Dreaming About Poop

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I very rarely have dreams involving poop or pooping, but last night I did. In my dream, I was supposedly at work. I work in a school in real life, and my dream workplace was a school of sorts with long halls; elderly people were sitting at wide intervals, quietly knitting but watching over things, and I could hear the distant sounds of children.

I felt the familiar tug of pressure at my rear, so I went to the nearest toilet, which was right out there in the hall, quite near to where an elderly lady was reading the newspaper. As I walked past her to the toilet, she grimaced a smile at me and turned back to the paper. The toilet was maybe eight feet away from her, across the hall and forward a bit.

Reaching the toilet, I turned around, dropped trousers and undies, and sat down for the task at hand. Quite aware of the lady across the way, I pushed discreetly, and was eventually rewarded with three distinct but discreet plunks. Upon rising from the toilet (I do not remember wiping), I restored my clothes. I nodded to the lady, who simpered for an instant and resumed reading. I turned around to flush.

There in the toilet were three turds (Three Turds in the Toilet — wasn't that a Sixties song?) that were light brown and of decent size and consistency. I hit the flush mechanism and discovered a new meaning for the expression ‘silent but deadly’. The flush was absolutely noiseless, but the water rose menacingly, finally reaching the top of the rim. There was no seat; did I mention that? As the water crested the rim, a smallish, lozenge-shaped turd slowly followed the current over the side and dropped toward the light blue, shagged carpeted floor.

Immediately, I turned and walked away – not hurrying, not saying good-bye to the lady with the paper, and just walking steadily elsewhere. I envisioned my other two turds also breasting the barrier and curling down the rapids, to then land on the carpet. As I reached the hall that led toward my own classroom, I encountered a dead end with three locked doors, each with the picture of one of my turds on it. It was then that I woke up.

Does anyone else have poop or pooping dreams?

17 Comments on "Dreaming About Poop"

Rattle yer Dags's picture
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Rarely, if I haven't cleared out before bed, I will have dreams of an endless poop. I push and push and push until I stop pooping poop and start shitting out my internal organs. Usually I wake up half-way through the liver. I'm afraid that if the dream ever goes on long enough for me to poop out my brain, I'll die "mysteriously" in my sleep.
Thankfully no sheet-destroyers yet.

Deja Poo's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points
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I never dream about poop. I am occasionally awaken from sleep by an ass cramp. Few things are more painful than your bowels trying to tie themselves in a knot.

Anyway, I'm wondering what Freud would have to say about dreaming of turd terrorism. Because of some unresolved conflict involving an old lady during your childhood years, you're stuck in the anal stage of development maybe?
_______
Yo quiero Taco Bell.

Yo quiero Taco Bell.

Ms. Mad Shitter's picture
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Sometimes I dream that I am pooping in bed or the shower. I dream that I am pooping really long logs that are several feet long. I have no desire to poop in bed or in the shower.

StackDump's picture
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I have a recurring dream mostly about peeing, but sometimes involves trying to poo.
It's always the same. I'm in a rather large bathroom like the ones in a school locker room. The stalls you can all see freely into. This bathroom is huge however. And none of the toilettes have TP and they are all disgusting and covered in filth. Floor filthy too.
And there always seem to be women there competing with me for stall space...guys too.

Very freaky dream.

Sigmund Freud's picture
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My friend, MSG, we must meet to discuss this.

There is clearly some guilt that you have. We must talk more, my friend, I can cure you of these problems for a small retainer each month.

You will feel free and open to the world after our sessions.

Bilgepump's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points
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Siggy, you've been dead for so long your accent has dried up and turned to dust! You are far more understandable now.

_______

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

The Anyomous Crapper's picture
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Odd dream.. I usually dont dream about crapping myself until it actully happens. Xd.

ChiliKahKah's picture
j 1000+ points
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Light blue shag carpet in a school hallway ? Perhaps a flashback triggered by previous LSD use ?

MSG's picture
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Yes, light blue (!) shag (!) carpet(!) in a school hallway--odd on every count. I've never seen such a carpet in real life, nor any carpet in a school hallway. The toilet right out in plain view in the hallway is another non-starter, of course, as are old women reading newspapers in such a place. I've also never encountered a silent flush--though, of course, in the dream the flush didn't happen. Perhaps I looked at too much odd art--Dali, de Chirico, Nerdrum, etc.--though that had been months ago. As a dream, it was a bit frightening, but funny as well. As for Sigmund Freudy-toidy, I read about the anal character back in high school, 50 years ago, and hadn't thought much about it since.

Montreal Gal's picture
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I often have dreams about having to use toilets that are clearly visible to other people. I always feel embarrassed. I think these dreams reflect my real-life embarrassment and my status as a (somewhat) shameful shitter.

When you say the word "poop", your mouth makes the same motion as your butt-hole does when pooping.

Toxic Waste's picture
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I have dreamed on two separate occasions about peeing. Never about pooping. On both occasions I woke up with a start because I came very close to actually peeing in the bed. I don't want to try to explain that to my goodwife.

Bran Lover's picture
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Sigmund has also learned to speak English in his old age...
MSG, Deine brust wartzen brennen uber mit fergnugen!

Fershehe?

_______
To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.

To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.

MSG's picture
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Howdy, BL, trying to read your screed with my rusty German. I think it means "Your breast warts are burning up with pleasure" or somesuch (but it's warzen not wartzen, and vergnugen not fergnugen). Not sure about the significance, even if my "translation" is correct. Nice to see German, though!

Bran Lover's picture
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lol. This is what one year of Cherman will get ya! I caint spell in German, but it does mean, "My nipples are tingling with delight." --and it has no relevance what-so-ever.

My apologies. I'm wearing my Freudian slip right now and it's bunching up.
_______
To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.

To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.

MSG's picture
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Yes, indeed--laughing out loud! Ve must try more Cherman, chust to zee vat happens! Ach, Scheisse! Ich habe vergessen die naechste [damned umlauts!] Part!

Anonymous's picture
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I have recurrent dreams of needing to poop and finding there are no toilets nearby, or sometimes there are but they are out in the open. I must poop in a corner into napkins, or cloth of some kind then take it with me to dispose of it somewhere else. I always hate these dreams! I am also terribly embarrassed in them - good word for this - and have to wipe and it never is easy or efficient. People are in the same room, and going about their own business, it is so humiliating. I have these once or twice a month I would guess.

Anonymous's picture
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Will wait for the sequel to the sequel: Eat, Breathe, Poop, Eat Some More. On a related note, I challenge anyone to find a culture where farts are NOT funny.