Alcohol And Squirts?

// // 259 Comments
l 100+ pointsm 1+ points - Newb
0
0

-

Dear Poopreport,

Why is crap so watery and fluid-like after a night of drinking? Bud mud or beer shit. Southern Comfort will really twist up your guts -- sometimes I use almost an entire roll of paper. Should I stop drinking or eat more fiber?

-- Insane Wayne



The answer is relatively straightforward: Alcohol is a toxin, and is toxic to the human body in even moderate amounts.

While we may have a few drinks and not feel anything, our body certainly takes notice of the alcohol. Alcohol is toxic to any area of the body that it touches -- from the point where it comes in contact with the oral cavity and is swallowed, down the esophagus, and into the stomach, alcohol is poisonous to cells and tissues of these parts of the digestive system.

The absorption of alcohol begins in the stomach and continues in the small intestine, where the bulk of the alcohol is absorbed. As the intestinal cells absorb the alcohol, the toxicity causes these cells to lose their ability to absorb water, and some cells even die. The cell injury and death leads to an outpouring of fluid from the intestinal lining, which is in turn poorly absorbed.

The end result is large volume secretory diarrhea. The diarrhea usually lasts for several hours until the alcohol is detoxified and removed from the digestive system.

Diarrhea after the consumption of alcohol is not a universal side effect. Many of us who drink do not have episodes of diarrhea afterwards. Why this occurs in some and not others is most likely related to the sensitivity of our individual digestive systems to alcohol, along with the amount of alcohol consumed. Furthermore, other kinds of food and drink can certainly cause and/or worsen diarrhea that was already caused by alcohol.

Does this mean we should never drink alcohol? No. Alcohol has been shown to have many beneficial effects throughout our bodies. However, I want to emphasize that alcohol is toxic -- it kills millions of people in the world every year, and should be consumed in small amounts with responsibility, moderation, and respect. Even by PoopReporters.

Best wishes,

Dr. Adams

Dr. Adams is a resident in the Department of Internal Medicine at North Shore University Hopsital in Manhasset, NY. Got a question for him?

259 Comments on "Alcohol And Squirts?"

Anonymous Coward's picture

The next day after a drink I have experienced more squirts and less urine. Why is the urine getting dehydrated? There is also a swelling observed in my large intestine. Could it be ulcer or cancer?

Prakash Nambiar

IBS NO MORE's picture
k 500+ points

A40C -- The doc is no longer in, but the answer to your question is yes. In fact, if you don't ease up on the drinking, your body will eventually abandon the purge method and replace it with a new and more drastic and/or unpleasant way to send you that signal.

When you say the word “poop,” your mouth makes the same motion your butthole does when pooping…
The same can be said for the phrase “explosive diarrhea.”

Anonymous 40 Coward's picture

Hi Doc,
I just turned 43 and lately everytime I drink whiskey, My system purges then Im fine after. Is this the way your body tells you to stop drinking booze, its had enough? Im a med-heavy drinker.

Anonymous Coward's picture

Google Kashi GoLean Crunch and farts. It's scary

ChiliKahKah's picture
j 1000+ points

For a real treat, washing down metamucil wafers with a six pack of michelob....want to talk about a strange brew....

Dalesaa's picture

Ever since I was a kid (and I'm 37 btw), I've experienced severe stomach pain and diarrhea, though brief (10-20 minutes), immediately after drinking sprite,mountain dew, seven-up, orange juice and apple juice, and as an adult, wine coolers and hard liquor seems to give me the same symptoms. I assumed that it was from the acidity of the drinks. They would all cause weakness and faintness, sweating, and stomache pain to the point of doubling over until it went away. As an adult, I've pretty much kept away from these drinks. Just wondering if the stomache pain is actually liver pain.

Redwoodgirl's picture

I learned MY lesson with the neon yellow squirts! I will never drink again! (till the next time)

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points

dedicated drunk ... I don't think your present squirts has anything to do with the alcohol you consumed two days ago, there is however a very good chance, judging from your writing abilities, that your binge destroyed a majority of your brain cells.


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

dedicated drunk's picture

i got drunk the other night, boy was it crazzzzy! today, two days later, i got the damn squirts. DAMN MY SHIT MACHINE! ;)

Assistotle's picture

Hey, HP. Your stomach will not get stronger if you drink more. You will not avoid your panties turning into skid row the next morning.

Here's what will happen if you drink more: you read some of the comments, these people talking about black/bloody shit? That means that their drinking has most likely caused a stomach ulcer - ie a burned hole in their stomach lining that is now dumping blood into their stomach. This is very hyper extremely bad and they should probably be in hospital. These people more often than not have fucked up, crippling stomach pains, too. This will, eventually, happen if you keep increasing the alcohol dosage.

Heard of 'pacing yourself'? This is the only way to do it. I usually find that when you close your eyes and the room is turning a little, it's the optimum level of drunkedness to maintain. You'll avoid shitting the bed that way, in most cases, and still be tanked enough to make an ass of yourself without caring. ;D

Found this article whilst curious as to how many other people get the proverbial ass-cannon of doom after a night of drinking. After not drinking for months I knocked back maybe 7 standard drinks over the course of a few hours last night, woke up, shat everywhere, puked szechuan chicken and am still shitting the styx 24 hours later. Nothing to worry about, though. You only really need to worry if you get black shit. (Or white shit. Not just pale, but white. That means your liver or gall bladder is fucked because it's not producing any bile salts).

To the rest of you that seem to have ongoing explosive shit - you guys might want to try taking some probiotics - decimating your rectal bacteria is a surefire way to sell yourself down the creek (shit creek, in fact) without a paddle.

Help Please!!! 18 y-old's picture

Everytime I drink alcohol and get drunk, I end up shittting myself no matter what i got dumped by my EX just because of that. On one side i like drinking and the peer pressure is big coming from my friends and encouraging me to drink on the other hand is the poop as a result from drinking. Now is there anyway in which I can make my stomach stronger, and be able to drink and get drunk?

Drunkensquirts's picture

I usually drink scotch or rum and don't have that problem. Now, when I drink wine forget it,large volume secretory diarrhea fo'sure! I don't think my cells like wine. Damn you cells! Great post Doc, thanks!

Anonymous Coward's picture

I, like a few others posting earlier, have diarrhea within 1-2 hours of having even just one drink. I used to drink a lot when I was in my 20s and never had this issue. I'm now in my 30's and I don't drink very much anymore (partly because of this) and it has only been happening for the past few years. I've wondered about a connection with IBS and am not surprised to see it mentioned here by some folks. I don't have any solutions except stop drinking, and maybe reducing stress, but I do feel better knowing that others share my pain, discomfort, and frustration... Thanks all.

ChiliKahKah's picture
j 1000+ points

Ok, I admit it....I am powerless over poop report.

Niseko's picture

The super soft toilet paper the wifey buys is startin' to feel like sandpaper. Our Japanese booty washer also needs a pressure setting, it's like pointing a fire hose straight up your ass. Recently put a whipping on my intestines. Feel like the victims from those "Alien" movies, except the little guy doesn't jump out my chest, he jumps out of my ass, hourly for days on end. Like a green inverted Old Faithful, slowly gnawing away at my sphincter meat. Thanks for the informative comments, shit myself laughing, not that I needed assistance.

Calvin's picture

Someone mentioned about Vodka shits, yeah, my friend had a free bottle of absolute vodka, and we have been sharing it the past 2 days. Gosh!! Next day after drinking, i have bad diarrhoea, very hot stomachaches and even yesterday, i had vodka, with whisky too, and there were bloody poops (looks bloody or was it reddish brown, can't tell). Now i know why!! I don't get so hot diarrhoeas with beer, beer normally just gives a lot of gas, but the vodka ones seem horrible. I'm not a regular vodka drinker, mostly i'm a beer drinker. And i drink in moderate (2 500ml cans a day, 3 days a week). It was only the event of the free bottle that i drank a lot.

PooHD's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

Max (and anyone else)
The tolerance thing isn't from the destruction of cells in your gut, it's from changes that happen in your brain. The 'buzz' you get when you drink is because alcohol messes with levels of neurotransmitters (which are like chemical messengers) and the processes that manage the neurotransmitters in your brain.

Alcohol, by the way, is quite small as a chemical structure, small enough to mess with heaps of different bits of your brain. So much so that all of its effects aren't known yet.

But we know that it DOES slow down how fast your brain and the rest of your nervous system works. This is why your reaction times get slow. And the happy laughy risk taking stuff is because the bits of your brain that are responsible for saying "hey, I don't know that this is that much of a good idea, you might regret calling your boss a shit head in the morning" have been slowed down and aren't functioning right.

So... back to tolerance. Over time, if you drink enough for long enough the effect of the alcohol on the neurotransmitters start to wear off. Basically, your brain is quite a clever little critter and wants to keep functioning at the level it's used to. So when you keep putting alcohol in and slowing everything down, it says "hey, I'll just release more of this neurotransmitter and start those processes to speed everything up again". SO YOUR BRAIN CHANGES and you start needing more alcohol to get over the brain's attempt to speed things back up.

This is why drinking when you are young is a bad idea because your brain is still developing (it's still growing and developing until mid 20's as we currently understand it). So basically you have a vulnerable, already changing/developing brain, and you pour in a heap of stuff that we know changes how it works.

And here's the kicker. If you drink enough for long enough, the changes your brain makes to cope with the alcohol you keep pouring in end up meaning that IT CAN'T FUNCTION WITHOUT ALCOHOL. You are now dependent on alcohol. You are addicted and you need to detox. Detox from alcohol is NOT FUN. It can actually be very dangerous. High levels of alcohol consumption is also not fabulous for your health and can start killing of your brain cells resulting in alcoholic dementia, among other things, like damage to your liver.

Once the changes have been made, if you stop drinking for a while your brain will change back and you lose the tolerance(this is what happens in detox as well, just much more unpleasant). BUT if you start drinking again, the changes come back again more quickly. It's like your brain learns "Ah, here's that alcohol stuff again, but it's ok, I remember what I did last time". This is why having just that one drink when you've detoxed from dependence can be so hard to do.

Just thought I should provide an answer to that question.

_______
Just working on my faeces

Just working on my faeces

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points

Dear AC.....You have made a marvelous discovery, there is a correlation between eating and pooping. Drinking is certainly fun and does provide some nutrients but it is really not a good substitute for food. If you eat food more often you may produce more and more solid dooks.


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

Anonymous Coward's picture

been having squirts for prob months now, drank a bottle of wine last night over the course of two hours and within an hour blasted out a noxious black half liter into the bowl. I drink Icehouse beer every day and the farts are godawful, the squirts much worse. sometimes if i eat something, stools are more solid.

IBS NO MORE's picture
k 500+ points

AC -- As a matter of fact, YES you can prevent/cure this issue.

The first and most obvious solution would be for you to STOP DRINKING.

If that's not what you had in mind, then you can somewhat counter-balance the poisonous effects of alcohol by eating lots more fresh fruits and non-starchy veggies (and a lot less of all other foods) every day.

Read the book linked below for more information.
_______
Open your eyes AND your mind to the power of food!
Health via Food (scroll down to read by chapter)

When you say the word “poop,” your mouth makes the same motion your butthole does when pooping…
The same can be said for the phrase “explosive diarrhea.”

Anonymous Coward's picture

So I don't suppose anyone has any idea how to prevent/cure this particular issue?

IBS NO MORE's picture
k 500+ points

Shitmeister -- the answer is simple: don't eat anymore Indians.
_______
Open your eyes AND your mind to the power of food!
Health via Food (scroll down to read by chapter)

When you say the word “poop,” your mouth makes the same motion your butthole does when pooping…
The same can be said for the phrase “explosive diarrhea.”

shitmeister's picture

Wow this site really does put my mind at rest.Sunday ate heaps of cabbage,leeks and beetroot then went to pub.10 dark rums later and an indian my spinctre exploded shitting in my pants
rendering my whole person soggy and soiled.even filled my shoes with shit.is this normal or a tummy bug.Whatever happens i wont eat leeks again.

the horror the horror's picture

i cant go on like this, the acid squirts this morning were so bad i was actually crying on the toilet 8 hours later my ring piece is still burning and i cant sit properly i think ive got 3rd degree acid burns on my arse
ive gotta stop drinking and eating macdonalds

IBS NO MORE's picture
k 500+ points

Sounds like a fairly astute and accurate observation on your part, Duude.

_______
How I beat IBS

When you say the word “poop,” your mouth makes the same motion your butthole does when pooping…
The same can be said for the phrase “explosive diarrhea.”

Duude's picture

Up to about 6 years ago I rarely drank at all, but over the last 6 I've increased my alcohol consumption to up to a pint of 100 proof alcohol maybe 5 days a week. I'd noticed a change in color of my feces where it got lighter overall with some additional discoloration within the stool. I figured enough is enough and ended my alcohol run this past new year's eve. In the 3 weeks that have gone by I've noted the darker coloration return. Is it likely the change in coloration is directly related to my alcohol consumption or is reading my feces in this way just a crock of shit?

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points

I think you mean "are you just generalizing".

Dr. Kenneth Mukamal, a doctor affiliated with Harvard Medical School, completed a twelve-year study recently that shows older men who drink alcohol have reduced risks of heart disease. The main attributions to this centered around the lower percentages of heart attacks, and this was attributed to a moderate drinker's arteries being clearer than those of a non-drinker's of the same demographic. This may be because HDL cholesterol numbers are higher in drinkers.

There have also been studies done in Australia as of late that suggest moderate drinkers have better cognitive functions than non-drinkers and heavy drinkers.

_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

eatbamboo's picture

"No. Alcohol has been shown to have many beneficial effects throughout our bodies."

So... what beneficial effects does it have? Any credited sources? Or are you just being generalized.

toolazytoregister's picture

I get the runs after drinking brandy,ugh.

Currently in the middle of a marathon shit and sulfur burp session.

Stay away from alcohol you might be allergic to and don't drink so much of it

Anonymous Coward's picture

I am 32. I have just had 2 glasses of wine and within an hour I have to rush to the loo. I used to drink a lot every weekend for about 8 years before this problem started occuring.

Sometimes I can drink and all is fine but not very often!

Doesn't seem to matter what I try to drink either, all does the same thing.

I tend to attempt a drink about once a month to see if I can handle it, lol!

The answer is no.

I get other allergies that block my nose and make me itch. These seem to be worse when drinking so I have been taking anti-histamines and these seem to clear up the nose and itching but if anything my stomach is worse now when drinking. My stomach is fine normally apart from a bit of acid here and there.

Anyone else with similar problems?

Anonymous Coward's picture

I have been drinking pretty heavily for a few years now. I had a night with lots of alcohol last night. Needless to say I have been feeling pretty sick on my stomach today. When i went to the bathroom i had runny poop with a fair amount of medium colored blood with clots in it in the toliet. Could my drinking be the cause of this?

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points

I'm glad you feel better. We all have our crosses to bear and things we can't do. For me, it's prescription pain medication. I cannot have it. The only medication that I can tolerate and not try to eat like candy is Flex-r-all (cyclobenzaprine). Otherwise, I'm pretty much a narcotics addict, and I know my role.

I don't think I'll ever stop drinking, because it doesn't cause a problem in my life. There could be a house full of booze, and if I don't want to drink, I don't. If that day ever did come, though, that drinking no longer was fun and I was beginning to miss work, etc., I'd pick up the book you suggested in a heartbeat.

I'm also happy you have real poop again. Accept no substitutes.

_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

clarktheshark's picture

To all the drinkers with rectal issues....wake up. Alcohol is poisoning you. Read Allen Carr's:The Easy Way to Stop Drinking. I just stumbled on to this book last week and it is awesome. No more alcohol for me and I am loving it! No hangovers, no runs, no depression and shame. Just sweet freedom from alcohol addiction, a clear mind and solid bowel movements!!!!!!!!!!!!

9coiler's picture

shit happens

Poothagoras's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

That dump in the bathtub three posts up has the makings of a good story.
_______
Every poop is not to be told to every body.

Every poop is not to be told to every body.

ChiliKahKah's picture
j 1000+ points

It is not the beer alone....it is everything else that goes with it including but not limited to taco bell, white castles, hot winges, nasty chili, nastier nacho cheese treats, etc.

Anonymous Coward's picture

I am post-scotch shitting right now, and I do not think that a handful of Instant Energy drinks is going to make things any better.

Nomobaths's picture

After my friend's 21st birthday, she spent the night lying next to the toilet in my bathroom. Upon waking up in the morning we all found out she got her porcelains confused... there was a dump in my bathtub! DAMN i can't even explain how stinky that pile of poo was!

sittingpretty's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points

I've never heard of jelly mixture. You must mean Jello.
_______
...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

Anonymous Coward's picture

Wow i experience the most explosive watery stinky black shits that sting my ass so bad that it feels like shitting razor blades. I now drink a jelly mixture when the horrid booze shits start. Mix up a packet of jelly crystals as you usually would for making jelly and take a glass full of the mixute (before it sets) and sip. Works a treat! voila no more beer squirts. and you also get to have some jelly for dessert too.

sittingpretty's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points

When your pancreas has been insulted enough, you will get the shits, Dungdaaddy. It is not always the liver that get beat up.
_______
...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

Thunderbox's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points

AC, your guts are probably just trying to get used to that crappy Singha beer they have in Thailand.

The voice of sanity

Anonymous Coward's picture

I recently moved to Thailand and have been experiencing the watering and porcelain-cracking. I have thought it was spicy food so I cut it out, but it did not help. I cut out different foods and even blamed it on thai beer. I even had a colonoscopy done. The only possibility I can see is that alcoholism is the reason. I drink heavily everyday and I guess it has caught up with me. At 46 I would say I've been drinking for about 30 years but only in the last year have I had this problem. So the only answer is is to quit drinking. Got to go, it's 2:30pm and no beer in the house!

DungDaddy's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points

Wow. It took me 30 minutes to read the thread. Some engaging stuff here. I have NEVER got the shits from drinking, even after some impressive binges. It proves I am tougher than the reast of you.

Anonymous Coward's picture

i'm a bit of a hypochondriac, and i'm obsessive about trying not to have diarrhoea. i'm just wondering whether it's better to drink spirits (which are stronger) or pints of beer/cider (which would be in larger volumes but weaker)?

i really enjoying going out with friends having the occasional night out, but i really don't want to end up either having diarrhoea the next day (which i think was part vol. of alcohol, part caffeine in the drinks) or staying up all night with the squirts (which happened after binging on beer).

Anonymous Coward's picture

that same thing happened to me except i actually shit ma pants...i came home let it all out then put a water bottle on ma stomach. i ended up staying home the next day to be sure and by the time i went back to work ma stomach was much better.super embarressin.

sittingpretty's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points

Now, in English< Bulgpimp?
_______
...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

Bilgepump's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points

so, y'all is lik rebel grekes den? thet thar iz sum scaree vizhuallz. splainz thet movy delibrants.

_______

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points

Bilge....Don't forget that Nashville is the Atthins of the south and Tenneessee is the eidjewkashun state! We spent almost as much on schools this year as we did fireworks!!


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

Bilgepump's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points

Its got to be really humiliating when a Tennessee Hillbilly corrects your spelling and puncuation. Tenk gewdnez i haz a edjikashun.

_______

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

Post new comment

  • Allowed HTML tags: s:62:"<em> <strong> <cite> <code> <ul> <ol> <li> <dl> <dt> <dd> <br>";
  • Lines and paragraphs break automatically.

More information about formatting options

CAPTCHA
This question is for testing whether you are a human visitor and to prevent automated spam submissions.
Image CAPTCHA
Enter the characters shown in the image.
To prevent automated spam submissions leave this field empty.