Alcohol And Squirts?

l 100+ pointsm 1+ points - Newb


Dear Poopreport,

Why is crap so watery and fluid-like after a night of drinking? Bud mud or beer shit. Southern Comfort will really twist up your guts -- sometimes I use almost an entire roll of paper. Should I stop drinking or eat more fiber?

-- Insane Wayne

The answer is relatively straightforward: Alcohol is a toxin, and is toxic to the human body in even moderate amounts.

While we may have a few drinks and not feel anything, our body certainly takes notice of the alcohol. Alcohol is toxic to any area of the body that it touches -- from the point where it comes in contact with the oral cavity and is swallowed, down the esophagus, and into the stomach, alcohol is poisonous to cells and tissues of these parts of the digestive system.

The absorption of alcohol begins in the stomach and continues in the small intestine, where the bulk of the alcohol is absorbed. As the intestinal cells absorb the alcohol, the toxicity causes these cells to lose their ability to absorb water, and some cells even die. The cell injury and death leads to an outpouring of fluid from the intestinal lining, which is in turn poorly absorbed.

The end result is large volume secretory diarrhea. The diarrhea usually lasts for several hours until the alcohol is detoxified and removed from the digestive system.

Diarrhea after the consumption of alcohol is not a universal side effect. Many of us who drink do not have episodes of diarrhea afterwards. Why this occurs in some and not others is most likely related to the sensitivity of our individual digestive systems to alcohol, along with the amount of alcohol consumed. Furthermore, other kinds of food and drink can certainly cause and/or worsen diarrhea that was already caused by alcohol.

Does this mean we should never drink alcohol? No. Alcohol has been shown to have many beneficial effects throughout our bodies. However, I want to emphasize that alcohol is toxic -- it kills millions of people in the world every year, and should be consumed in small amounts with responsibility, moderation, and respect. Even by PoopReporters.

Best wishes,

Dr. Adams

Dr. Adams is a resident in the Department of Internal Medicine at North Shore University Hopsital in Manhasset, NY. Got a question for him?

259 Comments on "Alcohol And Squirts?"

Anonymous Coward's picture

Anyone else have horrible smelling poop after drinking? I'm 30 & it just started happening in the past year or two. Seems to happen after heavy drinking, or even after just 3 drinks, no matter the type of alcohol (spirits, wine, etc)- what causes it?

GottaGoGirl's picture
i 2000+ points

(*sing-song voice*) Ohhhhhh.....Poo...di...a...TRIiiiii...ciaaaaaan.....!

Rum does it!'s picture

This is so weird. I started having this problem about 1 month ago. I'm 31, and I have gone out with my friends for a long time, and just now I started feeling this way. I guess I"m just too old to party like I used to. Mojitos, or anything with rum (my favorite liquor) wil make me feel this way... It sucks! I guess it is time to retire from partying...'s picture

haii.. im 15 and i drink like most teenagers do at thu weekend soO.. my fav drink is vodka but thu morning after i find my self having diarrhea!! i thought i just had a bug at first but then when i drank more vodka the same happend again looking from thu above im not thu only one out there huh x

AssBlaster2000's picture
PoopReport of the Year Awardj 1000+ points

We know the parents have failed when 15 year olds are drinking vodka.

We know the school systems have failed when 15 year olds can't spell the.

Anonymous Coward's picture

Drink more, eat less fiber, shit yourself to death.

Big Pizzle's picture

well every time i have over like 15 beers the next day i will have the shitty squirts for exactly a 24 hour period from around the time i wake up. i just now recovered from it and at the end i shit every 20 minutes for about 4 hours i thought i was going to pass out, LMAO....ok have a nice day.

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points

Are you going to do it again young man? Have you learned your lesson?

Sorry. I just had to ask someone the same shit my parents would have asked me.

.....hugging bunnies since 1969

.....hugging bunnies since 1969

Anonymous Coward's picture

I'm 32, I've been drinking fairly heavily for the past 7 yrs. This shit stuff only occured in the past 3. After a binge, I shit yellowy,watery, mucus type shit. And it burns my asshole. Goes away after two days of abstaining from alcohol.

Anonymous Coward's picture

"Drink more, eat less fiber, shit yourself to death."

ok, it seems like most of you have IBS, and thats not a laughing matter at all. I used to drink a lot and never had a problem. Then one fateful day I took a small dose of antibiotics and then went out and downed a few tequilas and beers. The next day I had the worst diarrea ever! 3 years later and I am still not ok.

My advice to all you boozers out there. STOP DRINKING ITS NOT WORTH IT!

and if you do. do it in moderation!

sparkles's picture

hey, nice site doc!
every time i drink jim beam and coke i have the worst shits the next day.. even worse its black from all the coke.. its fucked cos i cant even eat.. but thanks again i understand why I shit alot after drinking!

Anonymous Shitter's picture

I went to a place that had all the liquor you can drink for $10.00. Well after they closed I went back to my hotel and started puking my brains out which in turn led to me shitting all over the hotel room floor and my pants. Lying there in puke and shit. Was I poisoned by alcohol?

GottaGoGirl's picture
i 2000+ points

Ya think?

JustAsking's picture

Do any of you who get these alcohol related diarrhea, also get it with A LOT of stomach pain???

JustAnswering's picture

JustAsking: i do. today is the worst I've experienced "alcohol shits" and all I drank was cap't and coke all night. My stomach is in knots and i'm finding myself having explosive shitting episodes.

I typically have mild shits after drinking, but looking at a previous post, i was on antibiotics recently and i'm wondering if that's causing this.

Anonymous Coward's picture

Liquor in moderation is good for my bowels... it seems to stimulate it and everything is much fuller in the morning. An excess or light alcohol (wine,beer) is not good.

Anonymous Coward's picture

Dear Doc,
I was just wondering if you knew what alcoholic drink has the least side affects when it come to diarrhea and vomiting?

Thanks :)

Ms. X's picture

i drink vodka pretty regularly but i usually stick to gordon's , so like two days ago i try a shot of smirnoff and i've felt like i'm constipated but have diahrrea at the same time and it sucks balls. didn't sleep at all last night. wtf? i didn't know my body could tell the difference but apparently...

Anonymous Shitter #2's picture

man some of these made me laugh out loud. Just recently I've been peeing out of my ass almost constantly. It stopped after a couple days once, with a little medication for diarrhea, but a little more alcohol quickly saw that my pee came out of my ass again. . not really stomach pains, but some churning in there. Dunoo if I should take it serious or not, nothing on the web seems to point to something life threatening, but still I'm wary of the ass peeing.

Dysentary's picture

I used to drink all the time. Ever since I turned 29 I get the runny shits everytime I drink. It is so bad that I think I have to fart and I shit in my pants if I'm not carefult. anyone? Is my liver dying? HELP

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points

After looking back over this particular comment thread, I've decided that drinking also cripples the pinkies, thus resulting in an inability to hit the caps buttons on a computer.

.....hugging bunnies since 1969

.....hugging bunnies since 1969

Anomalous Coward's picture
k 500+ points

This is why I don't drink. I just drive others to drink. At least this is what my wife says...

Grogan's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

Dysentary: Having the squirts for a prolonged period of time can cause dehydradion. I would stop drinking, make an appointment with the doc and get everything checked out. Better safe than sorry.

I recently cut way the heck back on drinking, and now more often than not have solid turds again. Whiskey gives me the morning shits then by the evening everything is a-ok in that department.

GottaGoGirl's picture
i 2000+ points

Daphne, the booze may explain the pinky problem, BUT WHAT ABOUT WHEN THEY CAN'T TAKE THE CAPS OFF?

What causes that?

klsjdfkfldkgdhkgjdfh's picture

this has REALLY helped! i get this shits everytime i drink, i guess i do toooo much. eggh but i love it.

JJL's picture

So it's not just me who has this problem then. Good to know. I had been just fine drinking - even bingeing now and then with the boys; however, ever since I turned 29 or so, I'm seriously unwell after drinking, even only a modest three beers or one glass of wine on a healthy, full stomach. I have serious evacuation issues. My stomach doesn't like the booze but my brain sure does. I've had to reconcile the two recently. I'm no longer a drinker for health reasons. To those who can still imbibe, all I can say is count your lucky stars.

8 yrs. of this is enough's picture

I have had this problem for more than 8 years. Two or more drinks of any thing and there is trouble. I'm 43 and just quit drinking for health reasons. I swear I've almost died from alot to drink and very hot spicy food. Live to learn and learn to live.

The Thunderous Crapper 63's picture
k 500+ points

I went to college in Milwaukee. There is a place there called Real Chili. When I tell you if you get their chili to go it literally leaks thru the styrofoam container its NO LIE this stuff is LETHAL. Combine THAT with a night of drinking. Let me tell you if you are too drunk to order be careful,some people think its funny to order for you and they always get the chili of the FIVE alarm variety. This not only produces shits of biblical proportions, it also produces DAYS worth of LASER farts that burn holes in your sheets and in your shorts. It was and probably still is quite the place!
The Thunderous Crapper 63 Enjoying home toilet advantage since 2004!


GottaGoGirl's picture
i 2000+ points

That sounds delicious! Could I get a splash of Tabasco on top of that, please? Yum.

gottagetmynutsback's picture

yeah the whole shit thing really bothered me too! until i found the CURE, well atleast for me. good ole 1800 tequila! !!!GODSEND!!!
found something that gives me no hangover or squirts!

captain diarrhea's picture

I used to drink an assload...every day for weeks at a the bud-mud from drinking excessively. Now I have IBS, and shit all the time...Can binge drinking all the time for several years cause this? I'm only 25...
However, i like to throw my farts at my girlfriend.......hahahaha

Anonymous Nitwit's picture

I'm wondering why having a few belts the day after seems to "cure" the wateriness (until the next morning)

Looking for help to Hold it in's picture

Hi Doc,
31 yo, I admit I drink about 6-8 glasses of wine per night. I constantly have the runs. I take metamucil but it doesn't help. I'm worried about bowel cancer. do you think it may just be the wine?

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points

This question would be best handled in the hands of a professional wino. Me.

Your answer is yes. The wine is definitely giving you the runs.
.....hugging bunnies since 1969

.....hugging bunnies since 1969

banrigh's picture

Okay, I thought I was the only one with this problem. But it isnt the next day for me, as soon as I drink a sip of wine I have to run to a bathrooom and the poop explodes out of me. I drink every other day, about a bottle of wine. Is it time to give up the booze?

Miss Simone Scat's picture
k 500+ points

banrigh, Nope keep boozing. This too shall pass. Then normal poops.
Producing waste since 1967

Producing waste since 1967

Anonymous Coward's picture

man oh man...i sure am drunk...however, the mad fecal matter that will go down down down like a burning ring of fire has more to do with the half bottle of tapatio i put on my chicken enchilada. so good man. im sure the 6 heinis amd the 3 vodka tonics dont help though. The moral of the story: of your sttill reading this your are simple, or as drunk as i am. And I would like to be your dear lonley...

Ass Disaster !'s picture

I have just spent 15 mins reading all the comments (and been for an ass blast twice in that time..) I'm not sure that I have cured anything but i laughed so hard i nearly shit myself! Ive suffered with this for about 8years and boy is it getting wearing. I keep saying ill give up the beer for a bit to see if it is that which causes it but i cant seem to manage more than 1/2 day without a pint. Maybe the squirts isnt my only issue..... haha keep smiling.

i google poop's picture

I drank a few drinks that were made with some Midori and blue Curacao last night. It stained my poop green! But that's way better than when I drink vodka and my shit smells so bad. I don't know why, but vodka makes it so stinky. Nothing else does it to me.

phatmanxxl's picture
Comment Quality Moderatork 500+ points

I'm a pothead so I don't drink, but I might just go out and get a bottle of vodka to experience the infamous beer shits. Sounds better than a bum rush from a mc d's sausage egg and cheese!

Eight years of this is enough's picture

I slowed down from 4 or 5 times a week of drinkin heavey. To once or twice and often have two beers instead of 12 and guess what? Shits be gone! Suddenly fiber and eating right and exercise are not so uncool. As long as I moderate to the extream I think I can have a few good Ice cold brews we so love & admire. What do you think?

smith's picture

I've always wondered why alcohol affects the smell of my output so much. Whether it's a beer or a couple of glasses of wine the next day I tend to make rather stink when the time comes to have a #2. drug rehab in california

Anonymous Coward's picture

I also suffer from this problem, are there any cures????

Monkey Squirt's picture

This never used to be a problem for me, but it has become one. I stopped drinking while pregnant and breastfeeding (duh), but now even one drink will leave me with horrible cramps, foul gas and diarrhea for the next 24 hours. More than one drink and you can add vomiting to the list. It really sucks... I'm not a heavy drinker and I would like to be able to go out a couple times/year and not ruin the next day or two for myself.

bleh.'s picture

so i have read all of these and realized that only onne pperson has posted a CURE for the diharrea problem. for me, Jose Cuervo (tequila) gives me NO hang over or diharrea. and thats saying a lot, considering that i get the squirts from most all types of alcohol. the one night that i had Jose Cuervo, i was expecting to have some narly shits the next morning, but even though i had a TON of it that night, i had no sort of stomach pains the next morning.. so give that a try. PATRONE on the other hand.. did give me the shits. i only trust good old Jose Cuervo.


TidalSpiral's picture

Oh man does this topic touch home (and cotton). I've been having the Hell Squirts off and on for some time, but I had already figured out it was related to my drinking. I'm only 21 and other forms of liquor don't seem to do too bad, plus if I eat a good amount of real food (non-gas station or McDonald's level garbage) it stifles the effect. However on my normal diet and not eating a ton most days, the vodka gets my guts twisted like a copper wire in a hurricane. Unfortunately it's the alcohol I love most too. Grey Goose always lets me have it but I just got some Stoli Elit - may God help my culo.

Boomerang's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

TidalSpiral - What?

Shitler - The Real Poop Nazi. I also have a joke about him hating Pews (Poo + Jew) but that's a little too offensive....

Shitler - Poop Nazi. I also have a joke about him hating Pews (that's Jews + Poo) but maybe that's a little offensive...

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points

TidalSpiral, you might have a problem with grain alcohol. Try a good Polish potato vodka, and report back with the results.

Rum-bum's picture

If anything has come out of reading this discussion board it is that I must endevour to try new varietals of alcohol. I too am one of those 30+ year olds who has always consumed large quantites of alcohol without a drama... up until recently. At first I thought it was rum-bum... so I kissed goodbye to the rum. But then champagne, port... you name it. Its great to hear Im not alone and that my liver's not packing up on me.

shitwit's picture
k 500+ points

I'm glad I've cut way back on the booze too. With my angry bowels and the lactose intolerance in full swing, any kind of liquor just adds fuel to the fire. It may take people many years and lots of stained shorts to come to this conclusion, but sooner or later we all poop ourselves.

Rock-n-roll! Poopy-poo!

Rock-n-roll! Poopy-poo!

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