Kevin:

Boy this new wine-swillin' nurse is really somethin', huh? She gets real personal real quick!

I mean all you wanted to know was if a couple of specific supplemental products could change the color of your shit, and all of a sudden this lady is talkin' trash about your dick!

She probably doesn't have any idea what us stud pups have to go through during our testonsterone-charged younger years ... what with having to tuck our rock-hard wangers down under the rim of the toilet seat to keep from pissin' a geyser while we're dumpin' a load of crap in the bowl, huh? And havin' to somehow pull our pendulous ball sack up outta the cold, rapidly rising flush water.

All this dick abuse can have its toll on the old wanger over the years, huh, Kevin? I know Ol' Boner ain't what he used to be many long years ago.

So, what's up with this Nurse Poo? Why is she gettin' so personal about erectile disfunction? Is there a skeleton in her closet, per chance? A middle-aged, wine-sottened, limp-dick significant other? Really ... who cares.

Listen, Kev. You wanna have some real fun with Poop Colors, try this:

Take your vitamins first, then eat a large salad. Follow the salad with your regular meal and the saw palmetto. Now, for desert eat about a quart of pickled beets. Voila! Black, Tan, and Blood Red Turd Logs!

Lemme tell ya, shittin' a tri-color log is almost as exciting for us old farts as that mornin' pisshard used to be so many years ago.

Ah ... the memories.

Chill, man---we both share the same rich heritage of Detroit city.

love all around,

poonurse

Uh, poonurse, saw palmetto is recommended for male urinary health in general. Promotes stronger stream flow and can reduce the size of the prostate, which gets larger in almost all men as they age. I've been taking it for at least ten years now. Like TH, I think your characterization of it as some kind of desperate measure is somewhat extreme.

But I enjoy your responses in general and the effort you put into your work here on PR. Just have a slight difference of opinion with you on this one.

TBW--
I stand by my statement that most men in general have no interest in taking supplements unless troubled by mid life issues, or their wankers.

But, not having a wanker, I never really thought about it. Just seems like you can't get men to do anything about their health unless it involves their penis.

I believe I wrote that reply whilst sleep deprived and possibly intoxicated, so no offense taken.

love ya both.

pn

Well, poonurse, I've been health-conscious for a number of years now. I watch my nutrition closely and, as I have noted on these boards and in the Chat Room many times, eat mainly fresh cuts of fish, some grilled chicken, lots of steamed and grilled veggies, salads and juices. I take a number of supplements such as coral calcium, E, folic acid and others for immune-system and circulatory enhancement, and I walk quite a bit for my exercise. I'm not a bodybuilder or anything like that, but I am aware that what I eat will have a short-range and long-range effect on my body.

I do think there are men like myself who eat and shit healthy without regard to their peckers. BTW, I'm enjoying this lively exchange witcha.

Well, as I remain pecker-less, I am going to have to defer to your greater knowledge and wisdom.

Hey, I just put Mr. Poonurse on a plane to GERMANY!!! Party at my place!!!!

I'll go start up the hot tub. He'll be gone for a week.

He also takes supplements "just because he is concerned for his health". Hmmm. I know differently!

love
pn

PS===

You sound HOT.

Turd knows all and sees all:

From my previous message: "So, what's up with this Nurse Poo? Why is she gettin' so personal about erectile disfunction? Is there a skeleton in her closet, perchance? A middle-aged, wine-sottened, limp-dick significant other?"

From her last message: "Hey, I just put Mr. Poonurse on a plane to Germany!!! Party at my place!!! I'll go start up the hot tub. He'll be gone for a week. He also takes supplements "just because he is concerned with his health". Hmmm. I know differently!"

Re: "Take a Chill Pill"

Oh, BTW, Nurse Poo, I'm just messin' witcha. See, I'm the old fart, asshole uncle who sits in the most comfortable chair in the house at the family reunions and scowls. It's my role in the Poo Friends. Think of me as one rung up the ladder of assholedom from Doniker.

And oh, BTW, it was Doniker and I alone who from the get recognized Dr. Adams for the fraud he is. Check out past messages if they haven't been burned by the boss. But that's unimportant now anyway. I think you'll find that both Doniker and I as well as the rest of the gang are glad to have you aboard, lady! You seem genuine.

Peace in the Poopchute.

yes, I like the poonurse.

life here for me

I hate it when morons post.

So I guess I'll admit that I have erectile dysfunction and it probably is due to all the saw palmetto I've been taking, also my poop is grey. . . what does that mean? I think I'm gettin my grey poupon. Also I'm considering a colonic from a lady that has been asking me to come into the clinic for some time, but I don't know if its safe or what. Any tips? Also I do a lot of back country hiking and I've got this long standing debate I think should be posted here, I'm a scruncher and there are a lot of folders out there that swear they use less t.p. than I do but I don't think that's so, I want to know what the big wide world of poopreport thinks.

Sooo when will you ppl get off the limp dick thing and start getting serious about all these ppls shit problems(Kevin)...well i have a new shit problem for ya Mrs.PooNurse...I am a diabetic and took one multi-vitamin(performance)2 days ago.i am pooping light tan crap and some dark brown liquid is going with it too. Tell me my problem please...im scared:P

I SHALL STRIKETH YOU DOWN FOR DELETING MY WONDERFUL POST!!!! DIE FRENCH WHORE, DIE A MILLION TIMES!!!! YOU, ME AND A SPOON, AND A PIT OF DEATH!!! YOUR MINE CHICKEN FUCKER, YOUR MINE!!!!

poonurse I have a legitimate poo question.I am a recovering heroin addict who is on methadone maintenance.I take a daily regimin of 200 mg d-tabs. I know that opiates have a tendecy to constipate.However,since starting the meth sometimes I don't poo for a day or two when I do it's gigantic. It is getting to the point where it is almost scary.I think I have an idea of what women experience in child bearing.The turd is very stiff and the diameter 2.5 inches guess. It can be painfull but it passes so fast I cant believe it happens that fast. Some of these whoppers are18-24". Is this dangerous, sometimes it feels as if wy scpincter is ripping.Shed some of your poo light on this predicament. Has mr.poo returned from germany.

thanks for all this interesting info

Poop is usually brown because it contains bile. Bile is produced by the liver. Your poop being tan indicates that you're not getting any bile, and there may be something wrong with your liver. For the simple fact that one man studied had liver damage from taking this stuff, says to me, you should stop taking it because it's doing something bad to your liver.

My mother has this problem because she has never produced enough bile. Her problem is due to chronic vomitting when she was a child. Her liver has been tested repeatedly and is in working order (she is taking medication that may affect it) so I don't think this is the cause for all tan poop.

Tan pants, Yeah I like tan pants but hate those commercials ... Doh wrong board , tan poops man.

Welp .. like the noissee said .. no bile no brown poo . Livva damage .. I've read you can have 70% livva damage and not know about it cause things work pretty good till then, by that time it's curtains.

Bile duct blockage.. theres a very good point. Cholesterollic (sp?) food collects in the livva and the livva zaps em to make lil green and yellow soft stones. Dose stones donna come out on thier own usually and yep .. they are floaters.

If'n yur bile ducts R blocked and specially blockage in yous'a gallbladda then unblocking em will give ya brown missiles again and ya can go watch your favorite sitcom.

Sometimes dem tan poos relate to a pain in the right side undda ya's ribcage, yeah. Thasa where ya's gallbladda lives.

If ya don't unblock ya's livva and gallbladda ya get tannuns like the noisse said.

Check out my post in the floaters and sinkers section of this board.

When I flushed them greenies from my livva my longstanding tan poos turned brown again . Voilla! Now I can poo any coilla I wanna, and believe me .. Norton is much happier about that. Mr. Gleason don't care.

I too take lots of vitamins. I do this to prevent nutritional deficiencies later in life, and prevent colds and inluenza.

If I am picturing the pale tan correctly, I recommend that you go see a gastroetenologist.

If it is nothing more than a golden brown, you're fine. Vitamins can alter poop color. one example is Iron. Iron can cause bowel movements to become black.
_______
Born to clog your bog, with a giant log.

my poop has recently been very grey in color,
i mean grey , no black or brown in it at all ?
i am generally a healthy person, i do not take
vitamins or supplements ?

Dear Poonurse,
I am thirteen years old i have had for 1 day a whitesh colored poop but then after (2nd Day) i ate some oranges hoping i would feel better my poop became tan and hard to pass and i have abdominal pain when i go to poop.i've been sipping on water but it seems to make the pain in my tummy worse.

I am a doctor in Canada. Previous comments on here, while sometimes shocking, are mostly incorrect.

"Tan" feces are normal. They can be caused by eating too much fat in a meal, or just from a sedentary lifestyle. If they are yellow, then I would go see a doctor right away, as this is a tell tale sign of a serious infection.

Thank you.

Yeah, like we'd believe a government employee, especially one from a damn near communist country, hell, your flag just drips red.

I'm just messin' with ya!!!
_______

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.