laxative in brownies

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j 1000+ pointsk 500+ pointsl 100+ pointsm 1+ points - Newb
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Tina asks:

Can you tell me how much laxative to put in brownies?





Dear Tina,

Thanks for the question!

I imagine it would depend on what you are trying to accomplish, how many brownies you expect the person to eat, or how many people you are trying to make have diarrhea.

I'm going to have to wuss out here and not answer your question. Just experiment around with it, the same way we "old folks" did when we were young.

Please be advised that I am only a Poonurse. I am NOT a medical doctor. Any advice I give should be taken moderate skepticism. Please consult a REAL medical doctor if you feel you have a serious medical condition.

-- Poonurse

Poonurse is an RN with 25 years experience in labor and delivery. Her qualifications include seeing a lot of poop, and owning a computer. Also, she works in Michigan, which she calls the asshole of the universe, so that's another bit of credibility.

Got a question for her?












51 Comments on "laxative in brownies"

he haw's picture
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for a chick(15-20 years) - 2 pieces (ex-lax) per brownie

The Shit Volcano's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points
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Are you going to serve them at the White House?

I found Jesus! He was behind the sofa the whole time!

shyman's picture
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Why do you want to know? Are you gonna be like Donna on That 70's show or something? I believe she did that once, don't remember when though. I had the thought of doing that once, but I suddenly thought to myself, if I did that to a girl I liked, or someone did it to me, I wouldn't be happy with myself. If it's revenge you want, why not take a horse's head and stick it in their bed or something? However, if someone has done something awful to you, I'd say embarrass them further, like putting lax in the brownie, and playing it over a School PA or something?

The Shit Volcano's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points
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Hell, with the new improved taste of Ex-Lax no one will notice the difference. Those bars taste like brownies instead of like the metallic chocolate they used to.

I found Jesus! He was behind the sofa the whole time!

healthy 1's picture
j 1000+ points
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I can tell you how much to put in. NONE!!!

What are you trying to do? Is this a sick joke that you want to try on someone?
_______
"-55F, a new record low? Nope, thermometer went bad. Looks like -50F still stands"

"Two percent of the population think; three percent of the population think they think, and 95 percent of the population would rather die than think."

Asshole liberator's picture
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Follow the recipe on the box, but substitute mineral oil for vegtable oil, mash up two nine piece bars of laxative chocolates for "chocolate chips" and bake

Anonymous Coward's picture
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I did three pills in my old bosses brownies and he ate them all and was he in the port-a-pot all day.....all worth it...he asked me to make him more.

MSG's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points
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In essence, that's medication without a license and can be dangerous. I heard of this being done a time or two during my youth, and a couple of the kids who ate it (in this case chocolate cake) had to see a doctor afterwards for dehydration or the like. Also, think about this: Doing the Ex-Lax trick to someone you don't like gives, at first, the impression of trying to kiss and make up, perhaps even getting that person to trust you, only to dash that trust even worse than it was and perhaps damaging your own reputation.

The Thunderous Crapper 63's picture
k 500+ points
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Hmmmm makes you wonder what she is going to do with those brownies. I for one do NOT like a question like that for the plain simple reason that she has NOT explained herself or her motives. This form of turd terrorism should be justified AND explained.
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The Thunderous Crapper 63 Enjoying home toilet advantage since 2004!

AHHHHHEMMMMMMMMMM JUST CLEARING MY THROAT!! ;)

LOL's picture
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Um hey i was thinking of doing this to ALL my teachers at end of year 12 and was just wondering how well super lax in liquid form would work?

MSG's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points
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Dear LOL: In a word, don't. It's stupid, mean-spirited, and disregards all the work they TRIED to do for you (and would have, had you paid attention).

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points
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Not to mention that if you're caught, you might not graduate.


_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

Mrs. Mad Crapper's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points
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Maybe she should do a taste test to find out if she put enough in.
_______
Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

brizz's picture
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mmk..so me and my roomate tried this tonite..
we used magniesium citrate =) not exlax..
its abt 5 am..and i just heard the person who ate the brownies goin to the shitter ((ohh which i took the toilet paper out of)) haha..annnnddd i also made orange koolaid..and popsicles mixed with magneisium citrate..haha poor bastard ate the whole pan of brownies..and now he's drinkin the koolaid =)

MSG's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points
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While I normally do not wish for bad things to happen to anyone, in this case I think it would be a good lesson for "brizz" to have to take a strong dose of his own medicine and see how it feels. How long does he think it will take for his victim to figure out the source of his trouble?

Anonymous Coward's picture
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what about people who TAKE the food without it being offered? girls on my daughter sports team are always taking her snacks that she has even though she has told them several times not to. now i think they are purposely doing it to piss her off. i hope they enjoy whatever they steal tomorrow

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
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I must agree with all the posts made by MSG. Revenge is childish and accomplishes nothing.
Giving someone to much of a laxative can be very dangerous.


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

Bilgepump's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points
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Yep, Chief's right....way better, and much more fun, to slip them some LSD, or psilocybin.


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The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
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A little pot in their brownies would be OK also, as a matter of fact a little pot in my brownies would be OK!

I had some friends who were in Jamaica at Montego Bay back in the early 70s. There was a restaurant called Mr. Brown's that served a soup made from magic schrooms. My friends had just polished off a couple of bowls and gone outside when a tour bus pulled up to a gift shop next door. A middle aged couple asked my buddies if there was a special attraction at the restaurant since there seemed to be quite a crowd there. "Mushroom soup", they shouted in unison.

The couple decided they had enough time to give it a try since their bus was going to be at the gift shop for a while and they were hungry. They are probably still in an insane asylum somewhere in Jamaica.


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

Jandy's picture
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We put 6 peices of ex lax chocolate bars melted on one brownie as an icing. Then we put mineral oil in 2 cups of water in the fridge for revenge on our roommate. We shall see what happens tonight...stay tuned! LMFAO!

Bilgepump's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points
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You'll be lucky if your roomate doesn't sue you, or have you arrested...provided he or she is still alive.

Where do these fucking geniuses come from?


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The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
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Dear Jandy (not verified)....Will you still be in LMFAO mode after your roommate dies and you are sharing a cell with Bubba who weighs 400 lbs and has a penis like a telephone pole?


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

Anonymous Coward's picture
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You pussies - if someone wants to steal your food from the breakroom fridge they deserve what happens!

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
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AC ... There are other ways to take care of a thief that are not as dangerous. Having a degree of maturity, which you obviously lack, does not make one a pussy.


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

Poonanza's picture
l 100+ points
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Yeah that's pretty poor. Just make the bait taste like shit, and they might quit stealing it. Don't poison people.

Anonymous Coward's picture
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While putting laxative in food can be harmful to the prankee's health, methylene blue will be unnoticed in the brownie, and will not be broken down when pissed out.

That's right. you can make them piss blue. You can do this with certain red dye's too, but that's going a little too far imho. Most people will know they're being screwed with if they piss blue, but making someone think they're pissing blood is too much.

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
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As young boy scouts on a camping trip I, and several friends, drank grape flavor Kool-Aid
which the scout master, a fun loving prankster, had doctored with some substance that made us all piss blue. After the original shock we all enjoyed the spectacle of colorful urine flowing from our little dongs. If that were done today all the parents would probably sue.


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

babygurl's picture
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I am wanting to make a cake with laxatives in it how much should I put in it I don't wanna put enough to kill the poor bastered just keep him on the toilet for a while... the reason being is I keep making things like cakes and such to take to special events and he eats them all before I can take them I even put a note on it saying DO NOT TOUCH but he does it anyway so I have already asked his parents if he is allergic to anything and if he has any medical conditions and he doesn't and I will do this cake like all the others and put a sign on it saying do not touch which then releases me from liability if anything does happen ... so can anyone please tell me how much to use

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
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babygurl, How would you like to star in a news release like this one;

"NEW YORK, June 18 (UPI) -- New York City police say they arrested three teenagers who allegedly served cake laced with laxatives to the faculty at their Brooklyn high school.

The three seniors face possible assault charges after the prank sickened five unwitting staff members, two of whom were hospitalized.

The cake was served at a party last week at the Brooklyn School for Global Studies. The New York Daily News said no one was suspicious because the alleged pranksters included a straight-A cheerleader.

Some of the teachers told the Daily News they were saddened by the incident because they had felt close to the students this year."

Perhaps you will be placed in a cell with Buffalo Bertha who showers once a month whether she needs it or not and has a penchant for sitting in young gurl's faces.


_______
Dirty old men need love too!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

prarie doggin's picture
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Why not bake a cake in the shape of a penis and frost it pink with blue veins. He'll probably stay away from that one. You'll just have some explaining to do when you deliver it to your church social.

babygurl's picture
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Hey chef read what I said its clearly posted with a sign that says DO NOT TOUCH which is a clear warning duh that's why we have signs like that so u don't get in trouble like no trespassing and beware of dog and stuff like that so he has plenty of warning telling him do not touch... so its his own fault if he does

babygurl's picture
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Lol prarie... the sad thing is he would still eat it he does it out of spite and its so annoying

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
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Dear babygurl, First thank you for giving me acknowledgement as a chef (I do cook pretty damn good) and second let me tell you that if your dog does tear someone limb from limb you will not be exonerated from all guilt just because you had a "beware of the dog" sign posted.

You asked for advice and I am offering it. Your idea amounts to a somewhat sophomoric prank which could have serious consequences for both you and your intended victim. Grow up and forget this juvenile idea of revenge.


_______
Dirty old men need love too!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

babygurl's picture
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Idk what state you are from chief but in mine it does exonerate you from all liability ... and no I wont forget it ... I don't need your advise and to anyone else that reads these if you don't have a good prank or know how much laxatives to put in a cake don't bother commenting on my posts.. thank you

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
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Dear and sweet babygurl, If I have to approve your comments I reserve the right to offer advice, that is the way the comment thread works. I don't know you but you exhibit a total lack of knowledge about legal matters.

The problem is, if a person has a digestive disorder or problem, such as colitis or IBS, a laxative could, potentially, cause them profound embarrassment, if not actual health problems. Please reconsider this terrible, possibly harmful act.

Perhaps if you put a note on the cake which said not to eat it because it contained laxative substances that could be harmful if eaten you would have a legal leg to stand on but I doubt it.

Just switch to another, more adult prank, like picking your nose and putting it in their ear, or, one of my personal favorites, fart in a thermos and offer it to them to smell and give their opinion as to whether the contents are spoiled or not.


_______
Dirty old men need love too!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

John Wayne Gacy's picture
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I always used two pounds of Ex-lax to one Betty Crocker cake mix. I still had to finish them off with an ax though.

babygurl's picture
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No I don't have a lack of legal knowledge I know the rights in my state and I have already covered it with a lawyer so maybe you should stick to the laws in your state insted of acting like you know all the laws everywhere ... and he doesn't have any medical problems or allergies I've already checked so the only problem he would have is his a** hole burning ...

Albert Einstein's picture
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babygurl, Calculate the body mass of your victim then with M being the mass and O representing the tautness of their butthole and L the laxative the simple formula;

E=MO + √
_________
√ - MC - 15√ = (your answer)

prarie doggin's picture
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You need to listen to him babygurl. He belongs to the legal firm of Doggin, Thunderbutt and Chitterlings of Tennessee. They are well versed in these matters and as a matter of fact, Mr. Thunderbutt esq. has done extensive research in the use of laxatives and the dreaded goomba shits. He may just have to issue an order of Don't do that Shit against you if you persist.

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
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The Right Honorable (about some things) P. Doggin esq. has spoken. He is one of the firms most esteemed shyster....uh....barristers and his advice should always..uh...most of the time, be heeded.

From the desk of C. Thunderbutt, also an esq.


_______
Dirty old men need love too!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

babygurl :-)'s picture
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LMAO a legal firm of shit that's just to funny ...and john that's funny :-D

Butt of the Joke's picture
l 100+ points
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babygurl,first off,if there is one type of person I cannot stand,it's somebody who asks for advice and then argues with it.Secondly,it ppears as if you have too much free time if you bake so many cakes and don't allow anyone to have any.Last,if you want to know something,try researching it first,like testing the laxatives on yourself,instead of being a lazy bum who is just looking for the easy way out.Or,quit baking cakes that nobody can touch and do something constructive that is actually detrimental to life necessities.
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More people flush than they do wash their hands.

More people flush than they do wash their hands.

babygurl :-)'s picture
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Hey butt read all my post dumb ass I bake them for special events so they would be eaten he eats them before I can take them second of all that advise had nothing to do with what I asked for and third get a life ur talking on a shit web site talk about to much free time... I work 2 jobs and help with special events in my town

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
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babygurl, We are proud of you for working so much and helping out with special events. Now if we can just persuade you to give up your penchant for poisoning people...


_______
Dirty old men need love too!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

prarie doggin's picture
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babygurl, it appears you are intent on doing this and we cannot seem to come up with an alternative for you. In the interest of safety, Hey-butt and I will bake a cake tonight. I will melt several bars of ExLax, maybe add a little cream or butter and frost the cake ganache style. We will consume prodigious amounts of it and report our results. Would this be fair? You up to this butt?

Hey Butt's picture
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I'm game Mr. Doggin. I just helped my hound dog roll on a roadkill possum and I am VERY game. I plan on washing down my half the cake with some fermented prune juice. Rather than calling it moonshine I call it "where the sun don't shine shine." Maybe that should be hiney shine (?)

Butt of the Joke's picture
l 100+ points
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Ok,I read every single one of your "post" and yes,I am mistaken.I apoligize for that.

PD,I thought you would never ask.Depending on how well this goes,we should start our own business and have our own special events featuring our special cakes.However, a certain psychopath concerned with poisoning someone isn't allowed to have any.I will even make a "do not touch" sign so she knows.
_______
More people flush than they do wash their hands.

More people flush than they do wash their hands.

Doctor Rusty Starfish's picture
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Babygurl, Don't do it. You might KILL him! Drop this idiotic idea at once. Ranging from Ex-lax to suppositories, Metamucil, etc, laxatives are commonly used to relieve irritating bowel symptoms, such as constipation. Some, however, are using laxatives for the wrong reasons, abusing it to the point of death. Doctors often recommend that patients try other ways of causing a bowel movemen,including a change in eating habits, drinking lots of water, eating enough fiber, and exercising regularly. But using laxatives as a "prank" is moronic; you have no right to mess with someone's body like that and you could get into very serious trouble with the law.
Source(s):
Stanford Medical School site

victum of lunch theif's picture
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Every night at work someone is stealing my lunch... would exlax brownies be a good way to prank them or to find out who is doing it?

whatjusthappened's picture
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This is a shitty conversation! haha lame...... I was thinking about doing this too, that's how I found this website, I read most the posts and I'm still all for it, it'd be funny and satisfying to hear foot steps and flushing, and to ensure I don't kill anyone, I'll make it so ppl only get twice the recommended dose. Then I should be in the clear.

Anonymous's picture
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In most states the "Beware of Dog" sign makes you MORE liable. It proves that you KNEW the dog was dangerous beforehand!