can you poop if your butt's asleep?

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j 1000+ pointsk 500+ pointsl 100+ pointsm 1+ points - Newb
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The Shit Volcano asks:

Here's one for the "ridiculous questions" section: If your butt's asleep, can you still poop?





Thanks for asking!

Actually, I have had personal experience with this situation.

About two years ago, I ruptured a disc in my spine, and had numbness in my ass (and legs). I was able to poop quite nicely.

Please be advised that I am only a Poonurse. I am NOT a medical doctor. Any advice I give should be taken moderate skepticism. Please consult a REAL medical doctor if you feel you have a serious medical condition.

-- Poonurse

Poonurse is an RN with 25 years experience in labor and delivery. Her qualifications include seeing a lot of poop, and owning a computer. Also, she works in Michigan, which she calls the asshole of the universe, so that's another bit of credibility.

Got a question for her?












26 Comments on "can you poop if your butt's asleep?"

The Shit Volcano's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points
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Damn! What was I drinking that night?!?

I found Jesus! He was behind the sofa the whole time!

pooparoo's picture
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I have a hard time pooping on Thursday's. I can't figure out if it has to do with my diet, or if it's because on Wedensday nights for the last 8 years, I partake in anal sex. What do you think?

The Shit Volcano's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points
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I'm fascinated with your sex habits, pooparoo. Really. I am.

I found Jesus! He was behind the sofa the whole time!

Anonymous Coward's picture
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What is the record time to take a poop ..mine is two seconds :) ;)

GOOO POOOPINGGGGGGGG!!!1

Anonymous Coward's picture
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What is the world record for the longest poop in inches?

GottaGoGirl's picture
i 2000+ points
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TSV, we call that "T.B." (Tired Butt). It happens after a long drive or sitting at a desk for a long time. I never considered the implications of pooping while in that condition, but I would think the numbness would allow one to relax and let 'er rip!

PartyBoy123's picture
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hi im 18 years old and i have no leakeage problems, it is just sweat no odor or nothing just sweat. My ass starts sweating after i walk or run or do anything and when i sit down the butt sweat leaves a mark in my pants which is really embarrising and it feels really uncomfortable this just started happening like 3 months ago before that there was no problem. Is there anything i can do about this problem.

Double Flush's picture
k 500+ points
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This might disturb some of you.

I have a fat hairy butt, and mine sweats too. I've noticed that trimming the hair with electric clippers helps to allow some cooling. Also, in the summer, I typically don't wear underwear, and that's proven very helpful as well.

_______
So... uhh... erm.... POOP!!!

[Insert witty banter here]

healthy 1's picture
j 1000+ points
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Thanks for sharing that with us (eek).

I think that the concesus is a yes. You can poop if your butt is asleep.

The poop comes out of the colon, not the butt.
_______
"-55F, a new record low? Nope, thermometer went bad. Looks like -50F still stands"

"Two percent of the population think; three percent of the population think they think, and 95 percent of the population would rather die than think."

Cosby Kids's picture
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i have a particularly difficult time pooping in August.

i think it's because it was when Gwyneth died.

oh- oh Gyneth, however am i going to make bears without thy sweet lips to guide me?

anyhow- i suppose my question is if my mom calls me a mistake but she calls her poop bundles of joy, am I a piece of shi$?

Farts In The TUB's picture
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I have a question about GAS, thats poop related right? This is strange but.. I enjoy smelling my own farts! is that normal? I'm guessing no lol. But I cannot stand the smell of other peoples farts hahaha! If I have to fart and Im getting close to my car I will wait until I get in so it will not escape my nostrils! I also like to fart in the tub because those are staggering.

Anonymous Coward's picture
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I also like the smell of my own farts, I dont know why

Samantha nicole's picture
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hi I'm a 16 year old healthy young lady who only poops a maximum of 2 times a week. my boyfriend insists everyone should poop atleast 1 time a day. am I abnormal? I feel if I have no urge to poop then I have no problem... am I correct?

Anonymous Coward's picture
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You are ok. Just do whatever feels comfortable.

spattacus's picture
l 100+ points
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I'm not sure my arse has ever been asleep while I'm awake, but I think I've heard it snore a few times.

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points
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I agree with Spattacus, After sitting on a hard wooden chair or bench my ass will frequently go to sleep. I have never tried pooping under those conditions but I have heard it snore many times.
_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

Mrs. Mad Crapper's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points
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What about if your snatch falls asleep? Can you still piss? Fellas what about the ole bait and tackle? Does it ever fall asleep on you?
_______
Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

Alex Woodro's picture
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I also like the smell of my own farts, I dont know why

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points
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Mrs MC.....In answer to your question....yes, thanks to diabetes my junk has been sleeping for a couple of years. It is a dreadful situation when you outlive your pecker.


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points
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If my butt's asleep then that means the rest of me is also. Not a good time for pooping.

Chief, sorry to hear you've outlived your pecker. It could be worse if it was the other way around. The wake would be a nightmare for any young ladies paying their respects.

Shy Shitter's picture
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Yes it is possible to shit whilst asleep. I woke up the other night with a large skid mark on the corner of my bedsheet. My friend also had the same problem the other night with a case of the sleepy bowels. It was a big skiddy.

I also like the smell of my own farts especially sharts (shower farts). Let the steam enhance the experience.

IBS NO MORE's picture
k 500+ points
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Some chick going all "World According to Garp" on Chief's junk while he's laying in the casket would certainly be one of those things that make you go hmmmmm.

_______
How I beat IBS

When you say the word “poop,” your mouth makes the same motion your butthole does when pooping…
The same can be said for the phrase “explosive diarrhea.”

Anonymous Coward's picture
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I like to stick my finger in my butt right when I fart I throughly enjoy the vibration upon my fingertip and then I also like to sniff it does this make me abnormal?

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points
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I have a friend who spent a little time in jail and was placed in a cell with a well endowed Bubba, he said his butt didn't get a wink of sleep.


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

IBS NO MORE's picture
k 500+ points
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Chief, I know how to reawaken your pecker. With food. Seriously.

(and however long it's been asleep, it will only take 1/5 to 1/4 that amount of time to revitalize it!)

Be on the lookout for my next Poop Report. Dr. Hay's work with food combining was way more amazing than any present-day food combining site tauts.

You will do yourself a great favor, even this late in the game, to read this book in its entirety.

It's not an easy read, but I'm certain it will open your eyes and change your life.

_______
How I beat IBS

When you say the word “poop,” your mouth makes the same motion your butthole does when pooping…
The same can be said for the phrase “explosive diarrhea.”

Anonymous's picture
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i don't know how i got on such a f-d up website.