poop won't go all the way out

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j 1000+ pointsk 500+ pointsl 100+ pointsm 1+ points - Newb
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Problmaticer asks:

When I poop, I can't go all the way. I usually end up with poop stuck on my anus; and I really don't want to strain. This leads to endless wiping. I've fought this matter for while now... it's getting tiring, and I realy urge for a solution.





Dear Problmaticer,

Sigh.

You'll have to provide more details. What do you eat on a typical day? How much fiber are you getting? How much water do you drink?

Just offhand, I would suggest some heaping helpings of Metamucil, mixed with PLENTY of water, taken several times a day for a while. See if it helps.

Also-try leaning forward as far as you can while "going." Sometimes for reasons only known to the universe, this helps.

But do try the Metamucil. I am becoming quite enamored of it -- somewhat like a crack whore, but jonesing for the fiber...

Please be advised that I am only a Poonurse. I am NOT a medical doctor. Any advice I give should be taken moderate skepticism. Please consult a REAL medical doctor if you feel you have a serious medical condition.

-- Poonurse

Poonurse is an RN with 25 years experience in labor and delivery. Her qualifications include seeing a lot of poop, and owning a computer. Also, she works in Michigan, which she calls the asshole of the universe, so that's another bit of credibility.

Got a question for her?












232 Comments on "poop won't go all the way out"

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points

Pops, if it hurt like hell coming out the first time, why the fuck would you put it back for a second round? And, believe me, no one here wants to know how you put it back.

Well ok, I do.

pop goes the poop's picture

i have had trouble with my poop coming out TWICE before and im in the middel of the second now i dont want it to come out cause it will hurt somee of it came out today but it still kinda hurt whats wrong with me :( ???

Anonymous1's picture

Try this. I did it and it works.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CLZCoOwn0Jo&feature=channel_page

IBS NO MORE's picture
k 500+ points

Laughing, coughing, sneezing... any of those can help you blow the gasket.

But what if you don't need to, and faking it doesn't do the trick?

You could try the Retention Prevention stretch.

I hope it works for others like it did for me :)

When you say the word “poop,” your mouth makes the same motion your butthole does when pooping…
The same can be said for the phrase “explosive diarrhea.”

POO-FREE's picture

I totally just google'd this on the toilet while having the same problem

i laughed so much it just.. flushed right out!

sittingpretty's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points

Anorexic Barbie, get help for your anorexia or you will be dead before you know it.
_______
...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

Bobster's picture

Wear buttplug for 2-3 days, so crap will be pouring out of you on its own.

Anorexic Barbie's picture

I'm anorexic and it is alot harder because when you starve and not drink it's harder to make stool. What I've learned is to drink lots of fluids approximately 8 glasses a day, eat alot of fruits and vegetables. Also don't forget alot of fiber. If those don't work. Go to the nearest restaurant that will make you go :)

Anonymous Man's picture

I can have a poop but i feel there is still in my colon. If i really push, then small bits come out. The thing that is really bothering me is that i smell like poop most the time.

Anonymous Coward's picture

You just gotta hook it out

Anonymous Coward's picture

I have the same problem. You get about 3/4 out and thats it. Then you have to wipe all day and don't smell that great. It's gross and i won't leave the house because of it. I have even missed weddings and other events because of it. I had a poor diet and now im eating better and started working out. The problem seems to be getting a little better. But i still have this problem now and then.

Anonymous Redneck's picture

This is for "stank poo"---
I dunno if your around anyone who might wanna hurt you but I would ask for blood tests to check for poisons. Yes, I am dead serious. Doctors don't generally think to check things like that they often do not look for zebra's on a horse farm which makes diagnosis very difficult. Please get that checked.
To the rest of you, good grief halarious most of you, all I can do to maintain with cut-ups like you all, oh, wait a minute, guess that's a different subject.

chickdoc's picture

for the poop nurse:
the reason why its easier to defecate while leaning forward is because it is mimicking the stance of squatting, which is the natural stance for us humans to poop in. toilets are very recent in our evolution, sitting up is not how we are designed to eliminate waste. so if anyone ever seems to have problems going all the way, it can usually be helped by finding something to use to squat over the toilet bowl on, like a small footstool on either side of it.

ShittyShit's picture

Sometimes when I poop, It flies out of my butt onto the walls, ceiling, and other peoples faces

sittingpretty's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points

Apply pressure. If it goes unconscience start CPR. Maintain airway, breathing and circulation. Its like a worm though can't tell which end is which. You've got problems. You better make funeral arrangements.
_______
...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

Bilgepump's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points

Dear TSV,
Thank you for you query...apply a butterfly bandage, or, in serious bleeding, wrap tightly with gauze and tape over with adhesive tape. Keep the turd immobile, raising the injury above the heart. Cold compresses can help slow the bleeding as well. For extreme, arterial shit bleeding, apply a tourniquet and call 911. For your benefit, and that of the dook, it is imperative that you remain calm, decreasing the chances of the turd going into shock.


_______

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

The Shit Volcano's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points

Dear Poopreport,

Today I looked in the toilet because I heard something crying and noticed that my shit is bleeding. I'm really scared! Should I take it to a poop doctor? Is it going to die? Please help!

_______
I found Jesus! He was behind the sofa the whole time!

I found Jesus! He was behind the sofa the whole time!

Bilgepump's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points

Amazing, its because your shit isn't bleeding, your ass is.
_______

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

an amazing person's picture

sometimes when i wipe it is red but my poop is not red why is this?

Anonymous Coward's picture

EVERYBODY- lack of hydration in your bodies...drink more water if you want all of your fecal matter to defecate.

Anonymous Coward's picture

I've had a stomach virus and can't seem to go poop. I feel so bloated. Help? :(

stank poo's picture

So my poop smells like nail polish remover/acetone. It doesn't smell like poo & acetone, it literally reeks of chemicals. My gas smells normal and my actual poo is different every time. Sometimes I poo out complete pieces of food from a meal (undigested) and sometimes it's a big normal brown turd. However when I drink wine my poo is ALWAYS black for the next two days. I also have this strange Urachal cyst (which will rupture and bleed thru my belly button). So I'm confused. I have horrible stomach pains that have put me in the ER and on morphine that they assume are rupturing ovarian cysts, but my ultrasounds show that they have only gotten bigger. When the pains happen, my stomach is extremely distended to the point of looking pregnant& my stomach is tender for at least 2 weeks afterwards. I have had a colposcopy and biopsy for abnormal ECC, but no other procedures for it. I have been to several doctors and not one will give me answers. I had given up til this smell started happening again...please any advice will help and don't just tell me to see a doctor...

Bingobastard's picture

When a turd comes out only 3/4 of the way and stalls, you must "pinch" the loaf with your sphincter and prematurely end the crapping process. This always results in extra messy wiping, like half a roll of paper. Come back an hour or so later, and the rest will naturally come out on its own. No need to be bobbing up and down on the toilet or prying it out with your fingers. ("Eat more fiber" is a great tip, but pretty much useless when you are stuck in the heat of the moment.)

Russell's picture
l 100+ points

First of all, what is Metamucil,? And you might try shaking to get some of the poo off.

Russell the shitting queen

idasa South Africa's picture

I had most of these symptoms as described by some of the readers. Bloated, pushing and pushing, blood, constipation, diarrea, gas etc. Everybody gave me advice but it didn't help. I went to a colon specialist, was operated on the 27th Jan 2009 - diagnosed with colon tumor the size of a golf ball which was the obstruction in the colon and cause of most of my problems as discribed above. My rectum and anus were removed, I am wearing a bag for my poo (stoma) on my side (terrible!!) - I have to undergo another two operations - why? I was to shy to discuss my problem and afraid of stupid people laughing at me and making jokes (shame on them) please, if you have colon problems, rather consider it as a life threatening problem than to try all sorts of remedies - consult a colon surgeon!!

Laughing hard's picture

HAHAHA, I just have to say thank you to Fecal Tears. Although that was a very sad story, and I really do feel sorry for you, it was funny as hell.

Blind Mullet's picture
k 500+ points

Thats OK, pd, many young Aussie apprentices have trouble with that (and their butt-cheeks tend to blister quite easily until they're into around their third year), so the easy way to get the hang of it is to squat over a mirror for the first few times.
_______
I don't bite my nails, 'cause I don't like the taste of whats under 'em.

The white zone is for loading and unloading only- FZ.

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points

BM, the only problem I have removing stuck shit with your method (beside the oxy-torch stinging a bit) is that when I have to reach around, I get my clockwise and counter (anti) clockwise confused.

Blind Mullet's picture
k 500+ points

I'm sure I've posted this idea on another thread, but I can't find it. Anyway, for those of us who've ever snapped off a seized bolt in a casting, you know the only way to remove that remaining piece is to drill a hole down the centre of it, and install an ezy-out (a sort of hardened-steel spiral cone thing with a left-hand-thread).
As the Chief said, apply a liberal amount of WD-40, and gently twist the ezy-out anti-clockwise.
Often it helps to heat up the surrounding area with an oxy torch.

The white zone is for loading and unloading only- FZ.

Fecal Tears's picture

I was pooping earlier and my poop got stuck. I tried everything to get it out (straining, leaning, rocking, wiping) and all that came out were a few small pebbles. I thought I was going to die. Finally I had to dig most of it out, and then I prayed and the rest of it came out on its own. I then went into the bedroom and cried, and my husband asked me what was wrong and I told him. He laughed and said that happens to him too. I thought he was just trying to make me feel better until I found this website. I guess I need more fiber.

Anonymous Coward's picture

i am sufering bad from constipation. my mother says its because i dont eat correct foods but i do i just cant go to the loo. i am in such agony feelin bloated and sick all the time. i went 2 the doctors and he put me on duclocax but they make me worse the pains r unreal and just give you the shits. think i should go back to the doctors.

Anonymous Coward's picture

i feel bloated in the morning and feel the need to go but then end up feeling constipated. Then through the whole day feeling constipated until about 3 when i can actually do my business. And when i do, it comes out small and pebble-like. HELP

Anonymous Coward's picture

Can't go? Try dysentery. That should clean you out nicely.

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points

If only I could go..., it appears from your first word that you're a pirate. Do you have a hook? A peg leg? If so you are in luck.

loaf pincher's picture
l 100+ points

Diet my friend diet. It sure sounds like you should change yours soon. Or as bilgepump said maybe david orek can help you out or how about a Bissel "little green clean machine" they work well on cleaning practially anything.Maybe you should opt for the old trusty standby known as a "dig out"

If only I could go...'s picture

AAAARRRGGHH!!!! I feel like I have to crap really really bad, the proessure it just horrible, and the gas and bloating, but alas, I can push and push and push and nothing will come out!!!!

Debbie's picture

I have the same problem! I took 2 enema's today, and nothing came back out! My question is this. If you don't poop for 4 or 5 days, and then when you do feel the urge, it's only a small little pebble..Where is all that food at??? My poop gets half way out, and then it gets stuck, and I have to force it out with tissue! This is so disgusting! I've tried everything, you name it, I've tried it!
Help!!!

Kira Bule's picture

My poops have been regular and wonderful until I hit sixteen. I'm 18 now and I have irregular poops, sometimes I see mucous in my poop and sometimes they are sooo hard to get out. Went to the doctor about it and they told me it was constipation and gave me softeners, fiber presrip, and told me to drink lots of water. but it really hasn't helped. when I stick my finger in my vag I can feel balls of poo when I press down. how do I get all the poo out of me! I have been having pain on my right side, but its gone away. I've been drinking water, but goodness I'm pissing up a storm! help me out please :(

Hurt to push's picture

I had a kidney/UTI infection and ever since I have been treated for this with antibotics-It hurt to take a dump-can a UTI effect the way you dump your load-by that making it hurt to POOP,could my bladder be inflammed?

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points

PD......If acetone feels like
turpintine I might break the sound barrier anyway.

_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points

Chief, you might want to remove that WD-40 with some acetone before going naked bannister sliding or you could break the sound barrier.

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points

To facilitate the extrusion of shit from your anus, spray that hole quite liberally with WD-40. Conservative application of WD-40 is not effective and will leave you full of shit.


Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

Anonymous Coward's picture

I have had the same problems with my BM over the past 2 years. If i can give anyone any advice it would be, do not use laxatives! I could not get myself regulated and I used laxitives and aloe vera juice on a regular basis... BIG MISTAKE! About a year ago while I was having a BM I felt my colon come out of me! I went to a surgeon who diagnosed me with rectal prolapse. This is something very rare in someone my age, I am 25... I had surgery 3 wks ago and they had to take out a foot and a half of my colon. So painful :(

robmusey's picture

for the past week i have been really consipated and feel like needing a poo alot of the time and when i go it is very broken up, small and hard to get out. it is a challenege to even get tiny bits out of my system. this may seem odd but it smells funny too (kinda very pure) as in its came out too early or something i don't know. how cna i sort this problem out of not feeling to need a poo most of the day. apart from drink water and eat fibre.

Silly pooty's picture

..... If you excuse me now i will go take a puke.. okai anyway either eat more fiber and drink lots of water or.... get out the vaccum cleaner ((Ones with the hose)) and stick that hose up your ass XD

Love to Poop's picture
m 1+ points - Newb


Ummmmm I haven't even read the story yet, butt the comments are already grossing me out. Holy Cow!
______________________________________
Kimmy!!! Get your thumb out of there! I'm about to blow!

______________________________________
Kimmy!!! Get your thumb out of there! I'm about to blow!

Lorrie's picture

Hi, i have always had trouble with my digestion. I take colace on a regular basis or fiber substitute...
Still takes me a week sometimes two for a bowel movement.
lately its soft and smells almost like deisel or old gasoline. very overwhelming smell enough to knock me out.
help!

bushra's picture

iam having same problem when i feel like i want to poo i find it hard to go out,im in antibiotic at the moment cos i have vaginal infection,and this i helpin me at this time cos antibiotic it cause diarrhea :D
well,i went to doctor and he said all i have to do is to relax and not to get nervous when its time to go to bathroom.

Bilgepump's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points

A Kirby using the crevice tool would suck that bitch right out of ya.
_______

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points

A fall from the third floor and landing on your ass will usually dislodge the fucker.

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