do hemmorhoids smell?

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Hubby asks:

My wife is twenty-five and has had two children now. It's been about fifteen months since the last child and she
still has hemorrhoids. She doesn't mind the hemorrhoids as much as the smell. We're pretty sure that it's the hemorrhoids that smell.

I guess the question is this: can hemorrhoids produce a foul odor? And if so, what causes it and what can be done to get rid of it?


Dear Hubby

Your wife has hemorrhoids. These are swollen veins in the ass -- not rosebuds, dear. They are gonna be somewhat stinky simply due to their location. Hemmies can actually keep the anus from closing completely which can allow some anal leakage; the can even just let the odor from the walls of the rectum seep out. There is shit in there on a regular basis you know, so it's gonna smell like shit.

Sitz baths might be beneficial to her. If not for the smell, they at least should be soothing to the 'roids and allow for some shrinkage. Witch-hazel ointments, medicated pads, Preparation-H cream and other over-the-counter medications can also be used to try to get rid of the hemorrhoids.

In the meantime, just simply wiping with a fresh-scented moist towelette and applying absorbent talcum powder or feminine deodorant spray might cut down the foulness.

Thanks for asking Motherload!

Motherload is a Certified Nurse Assistant as well as an IBS sufferer, which means she knows a lot about poop. Got a question for her? Ask it here.












24 Comments on "do hemmorhoids smell?"

phatmanxxl's picture
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Good ol Roids.

prarie doggin's picture
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Ah, marriage. Did you ever think when dating that hot 19 year old, that this was in your near future? Seriously, put some witch hazel on a cloth, stick it back there and clamp your buns tighter than a prisoner taking his first shower. Try for about 5 minutes three times a day.

Anonymous Coward's picture
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mannn this is what makes me think about adopting instead of ruining the body of my hot future wife..hahha

Hieronymous Bowels's picture
l 100+ points
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This is one of those things that is outrageously painful at first but then results in tremendous relief:Rubbing alcohol, if you can handle the five minutes or so of intense pain and burning the after-effect is God-blessed relief.

prarie doggin's picture
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HB, you forgot to mention roughing it up with sandpaper first.

HowleyKook's picture
l 100+ points
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If rubbing alcohol seems a little harsh try something a little milder, maybe Softscrub with Bleach. It'll leave a nice clean smell!
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Happy Crappin'
Homegrown Media Network

Happy Crappin'
Homegrown Media Network

Turdsmith's picture
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If there's blood or mucus coming out, it makes great food for all those bacteria coming out of her butt. They help poop stink, so hemorrhoidal superfood can give a super stink.

She should her crack clean as well by washing it at the sink, to avoid getting an infection.

I had hemmies a few years ago and smelled like a tramp - even after a shower! Plugging the blood flow with a bit of toilet roll helped, although it was absolutely putrid by the time I changed it (every 4 hours). Thank poop it cleared up.

In the meantime, best use the front door!

Anonymous Coward's picture
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I'm a guy, and I got these annoying roids. I thought theid go away. Kept thinking ill be fine. Now im notecing,, that people around me are picking up the smell, and sucks.. Take frequient showers. Mine though, external and internal roids. I find there is no cure for this $@#$, best is surgery. Does any one know any of best healler for things? Prep H just makes it all greasy there, does help, not much though.

El Scumbag's picture
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Try different ointments. Anusol works for me. And wet wipes with aloe vera such as Huggies Natural Care. Very soothing.

Or you could just burn them off with a blowtorch.

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
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Anonymous coward who posted early this morning, El Scumbag is correct, throw away your Preparation H, it's practically useless, and try some Anusol. You can put a dab of hydrocortisone on the Anusol before inserting it. Was your butt hole well with soap and water several times a day, particularly after taking a dump. Surgery should be a last resort, it is seldom successful in the long run.
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Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

Anonymous Coward's picture
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My boyfriend and I had sex last night and while preforming a trick....he smelled like rotten fish, I dont want to think he is cheating, but could this be due to roids? He is a frequent pooper like 5 times a day! So I ask the same question but in a diffrent form, can MEN smell like rotten va-jay-jay with roids?

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
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After pondering the question a little more (can hemorrhoids smell) I have arrived at the following conclusion. When one has a painful hemorrhoid not only the act of pooping but also the act of wiping hurts. When something causes pain we are less inclined to do it. Perhaps a hemorrhoid rimmed butthole does not get the attention it really deserves post poop, thereby leaving it with a foul aroma. This is, I might add, merely conjecture on my part and no balloon knots were actually sniffed.
_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

Squat-n-leaveit's picture
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AC, the answer to your question is no. If your desire is for fidelity, best find another boyfriend. Remember, the difference between love and herpes, is herpes is forever.

worry wart's picture
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Ok, so I just noticed that I have a bump on mah bootyhole....it hurts i think its a hemmie BUTT when I touched it, it oozed out clear stuff....like not watery stuff pretty much gooey stuff....can the roids do this?? ALSO it stunk, bad...

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
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wart ... It sounds more like you have a cyst than a hemorrhoid, let a doc take a peek up your ass.


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

Squat-n-leaveit's picture
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Hemorrhoids can not smell, because they do not have noses.

An older joke might exist somewhere... "A caveman, a T-Rex and a Triceratops walk into a bar..."

Anonymous Coward's picture
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I have an odd problem, I use Tucks to wipe. However, the tucks embeds the smell of poop on my hands. No amount of soap will take away the smell! Is there something that can be done. Strangely, I know the smell of AD ointment trumps all, but can't I just get rid of the smell with something else?

prarie doggin's picture
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There is a solution AC, but it may sting a bit.
Just cut off your hands.

Squat-n-leaveit's picture
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Sorry PD, it won't work. He could use a skill saw to cut off the first one. how could he hold it to cut off the other?

Anonymous Coward's picture
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Try using only one side of the Tucks. That'll keep the crap off your hands.

Anonymous Coward's picture
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Hi, I have hemorrhoids and I ooze stinking oily stuff after I put Anusol up my arse. Advice for anyone with hemorrhoids; eat tons of fiber, drink at least 2 liters of water a day, and don't sit too long. Walk or stand after every hour and take sitz baths, they sooth and help the smell. Once hemorrhoids are gone the smell will be gone too.

Anonymous Coward's picture
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Has anyone tried using tea tree oil on hemmies? It removes warts, why wouldn't it work on hemorrhoids?

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
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There is quite a bit of difference in a wart and a hemorrhoid. A hemorrhoid is swelling and inflammation of veins in the rectum and anus while warts are growths of the skin and mucous membranes (the mouth or genitals) that are caused by over 100 types of the human papillomavirus (HPV). The virus causes thickening of the top skin layer.

You don't want to remove a hemorrhoid like you would a wart, you just want to shrink it.

If you really want to snip it off I would suggest pruning shears and an object to bite down on!


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How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

the thin brown line's picture
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Roidal Blankets
Rub a dab of aloe vera gel on affected roid mounds.
Coat with powdered sugar.
Stick butt in freezer until a light, cool frost develops.
You gonna need a mirror.___
Somethin' mysterious made an exit from the gift shop.

Somethin' mysterious made an exit from the gift shop.