Sounds sort of like a food allergy. I have this problem all over the place because I am allergic to coconut and they put it in everything. Sure, not everything has foul tasting white flakes in it. Sometimes it's just coconut oil, which is cheap. Poonurse has a good idea on the record keeping. It'll track down whatever the hell it is.

That, or the place you are eating uses olestra. That goes through anyone's system like a shot. Nasty, nasty stuff!!!!

I used to have exactly this same reaction whenever I ate shrimp. Now I just break out in hives and stop breathing.

Same thing happens when I eat the aforementioned coconut.

KFC will cause me to do that. It seems if I eat really greasy food it gives me a case of the instant squirts.

My feces had white flakes in it today..What's up with that?

Sounds like butt snot, Nutty Hev. It happens sometimes.

The same thing hapened a couple of years ago at a BBQ I was hosting. I ate some Caesar salad and BLAM! 15 minutes later I had undigested romain lettuce spackling my toilet bowl. Ever since then I have had problems with romain lettuce.

I have something similar to that. I can't eat yogurt, regardless of what kind it is. If I have some yogurt, My normal feses will turn into liquid chocolate posicles.

One day, my girlfriend offered me something to eat, because I have an ulcer, so I have to eat every two hours, she offered yogurt to me, and my response was 'Why don't you eat a box of prunes, or drink a whole bottle of Ex lax first, then we'll see." She caught on quickly.

Carrots come out of my ass really quickly, I've recently discovered. I think I have developed an allergy to the things, which is okay by me because I HATE carrots and always have.

Ugh-I can't eat carrots either. They cause me severe intestinal pain for about two hours (the next day) followed by a butt explosion which is completely full of little orange pieces of carrots. Funny thing, I can eat all the cooked carrots I want, but more than one or two raw little sticks causes this EVERY time.

I also go to the restroom quite quickly after eating(sometimes chunks + liquid, and seeds like its undigested). At first i thought i was allergic to lactose but i ate a friends Greek lasagna and although coming out 15 minutes later it was huge solid, nicely evenly brown, and an astounding but common 1 1/2ft X 2inch crap. I stopped eating greasy food, maybe ill be fine. Hopefully my loud intestinal noises will cease now(it was quite bad when lying down and i never had this problem before a few months ago) I'm a body builder, maybe thats why i crap so quickly. Good luck man. I know i probably need it.

Dear Pooh Nurse,
Every time I eat cooked onions I have torrents of liquid brown pooh. Raw onions are not a problem though. Both of my sisters are aflicted with this, but not my brother. Is this do to an allergy, or have ass gnomes crawled up our collective poopers and run amuck?
Also my girl freind thinks allien space craft have taken up residence in my colan and can be removed with a "magnetic probe". Is this even posible? In the interest of humering her should I let her "probe" me?
Wet and wondering in New Jersey

This has been one of my pet peeves regarding PR posts for almost as long as I've been visiting. In reality, it takes HOURS for ingested material to make the 25 foot-long passage through the alimentary system. Coincidentally timed eruptions have got to be some kind of "direct-line" connection between the front and back ends, but I CAN'T imagine that anything you eat could possibly race through the whole length of plumbing in 15 minutes. No way...

I've noticed lately that if I drink wine or cocktails at a dinner party, I often wind up with bits of undigested lettuce and other particles of vegetables in my poop. I don't recall this happening when I was younger. What's going on? Am I developing some sort of gastric intolerance to alcohol or am I just getting old (39)? Gallbladder problems do run in the family, but I kind of don't think that's it.

Fudge - got to support you again here, old boy!! Absolutely, and well put. Maybe there is an exception where a person is actually ill, like gastro-enteritis, when the process is accelerated, but normally, no, 15 minutes is absurd.

Actually its called mass peristalsis which can be triggered I would imagine not only by drinking cold water but by eating as well. Your food does NOT just PASS thru you in 15min BUT anything you have eaten prior to that could be forced out to make room for the new stuff coming in. Does that also sound about right oh great Poo Nurse?
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The Thunderous Crapper 63 Enjoying home toilet advantage since 2004!

i have to poop about every 15 minutes but its sort of like diarrhea but ive heard people call it “the runs ” even if i dont i have to poop about every 15 mins. could you please help me

I think what you're experiencing in relation to the restaurant food has something to do with the gastrocolic reflex. This reflex, in a normal person, is enacted after ingesting a meal. It basically means that once food hits your stomach, your colon has a reflex to poop (which is good, in order to even out the amount of food/feces in your body). It may just be that certain foods will illicit a stronger gastrocolic reflex for you. I would guess that this isn't a problem unless it's very hard for you to control yourself. In that case, don't eat that food, or see a doctor if it's very bad!

For me large meals can be the catalyst for an emergency, unstoppable ass explosion. The body's way of making room. Throw in a milkshake or ice cream after eating, and the countdown begins. It runs (ha!) in the family. We all nod sympathetically and knowingly, if one gets suddenly pale and quiet, during a long drive home from a restaurant.
Can food get from the front to the back in 15 minutes? To trigger yes. To get there, no. Not without some serious cramping. If the body wants it out that fast, the front door is easier. But an hour - without ill effects. Yes. Just remember to drink some water to replace the loss. Also, get some Acidophilus from the drug store or Walmart to restock your stomach's little helpers that got rudely ejected. Otherwise, it could continue for days. (esp. if you are taking antibiotics). My two cents.

Good point, Rocket Man.

You can buy acidophilus in pill form, and it's not that expensive. You can also buy it in paste form, but it tastes kind of funny.

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.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

i poo at least 5 times a day.. especially after a meal.. lil brown squirts.. can't seem to keep anything in me? am i lactose? cancer? i need help!!

I used to have the exact problem in this question. I would go to this one chinese restaurant and if I ate the General Tso's, within 15 minutes it was emergency run for bathroom time. It only happened when I ate the General Tso's, and only the General Tso's from that one restaraunt. AND it hasnt happened since.

I will sometimes, however, need to go right after having an iced mocha latte. Not when it's hot, just cold. And not with other dairy. I just chocked it up to an odd digestive system and went with it.

I get the squirts right after Pizza Hut, or any pizza for that matter. Maybe it's because for the last 10 years I have eaten 3-4 pizzas per week. Help me poonurse!

The firat time I ate octopus was in Rhodes, Greece, some 20 years ago. It was pickled, I think, and not exactly pleasant, as it was so rubbery. I swear to God, it came out less than two hours later, because when I expelled a bit burst of frothy shite into the bowl, it seemed to have little bits of tentacle in it.

It's possible that I might simply have shat out worms, but I doubt it very much.

But I agree that 15 minutes seems a trifle fast to travel through nearly 30 feet of digestive tract. Certainly, if the gut doesn't like what's going in, it'll do everything it can to get rid of it as quickly as it can, so I can well believe that 15 minutes after eating, Stash's arse rebelled and tried to excrete as much as it could as quickly as possible, which could very well include some of the rotten undigested fecal matter that everyone has in their colon.

Yeah, it can be quick. My wife used to get panic attacks and bad headaches, especially if we were going out for a meal with a group. The doctor gave her equagesic tablets, which were a muscle relaxant and pain-killer. Problem was, unknown to us they were relaxing the wrong muscle! She'd take 2 when she got stressed, eat a meal and then spend the rest of the time in the restaurant crapper, shitting out what she'd just eaten. It was ages before we made the link.
It seemed unfair to have to pay for food that didn't leave the premises!

Ah, ha ha, I had to laugh. Yup, I can be spewing an anal fountain in 15 minutes **every time** right after certain Thai food, regardless of restaurant. It's awesome - and unstoppable: If I can't get to a relief station like RIGHT NOW, there's gonna be a mess. It's amazing how violent the cramps are, and the exit speed is also truly remarkable, not to mention the paint-peeling aroma.

The best part: I love Thai food, so I do it on a regular basis. Hey, it keeps the intestinal parasites down to a minimum, ya know?

Since it can be such a wonderfully splatteriffic time, maybe I should take pictures next time and post them over at . Just for educational purposes, of course.

... or maybe not, since we are not that interested.

I have been going poop every time **and I mean every time** I go pee since yesterday. AND I've been peeing about every 15 minutes. The poop's not entirely solid but not runny either. My bum is sore from wiping so often and I've grown rather tired of pooping. Does this sound like it might be some sort of virus that I should go to a doctor for or do you think that it will eventually stop once I've gotten all of the poop out of me?

Thanks.

I've been dieting and I noticed that if I occasionally treat myself to something a little greasy I end up having to go to the bathroom within 15-60 minutes later. What I was wandering is...does your body take in all of those calories/fat if you go to the bathroom that quickly afterwards?

Sorry to have to tell you Diet Girl but the fat suckers in your body work overtime when you eat fast traveling greasy food. They work quickly to vacuum every precious calorie from the greasy goodies as they speed by on their way to your asshole. You will eventually be as plump as a hippo.

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Eat chilies and feel the burn!!