I'd rather have flat poop.

Ribbon poo...can you tie it into a little fecal bow? Seriously though, something like that needs to be checked out.

Well, sometimes I get a turd that is somewhat flat.
However, it is usually because it hits the back end of the crapper with great force.

SPLAT! Ha ha ha!!!

Flat pooper get to a DOCTOR. This was my Dad's first symptom of colon cancer. He ignored it until it got down to pencil poop ... and then finally bloody pencil poop. He then went to the doctor and three months later we buried him. So yeah, you could ignore your flat poop ... you could say that it will take care of itself one way or another.

That sucks, dude. But I'd still rather have flat poop than have someone looking up my ass.

I recently had a similar experience, except it eventually involved pain and swelling around the outside of the poop chute. I ultimately couldn't take the pain anymore and went to doctor ( luckily i was refered by a friend to a surgeon). Doc said it was a Perirectal Abcess and drained me out right then and there. The surgery wasn't painfull, but the recovery required some pain medicine; in actuality the recovery pain was no where near the pain I felt before i went to the doctor. Flat poop is no good, go see a doctor. Oh, and BTW my experience at the doctor involved no "wrong way" entry.

What is wierd to me, is that it can be flat then go normal again. I myself had flat poop once, but it returned to normal within about a week.

I have flat poop, it has been that way about a year. I read this comment form poonurse and freaked out. I went and got checked with a 5 foot snake rod with a camera on the end. It was not painful as I was asleep at the time anyway I checked out Great. Nothing wrong the Dr. told me 90% of the time it is the anus muscle that does the poop end. Oh well that is my experice hope this helps someone.

what does it mean if my poop comes out in several one inch balls? it looks kind of like rabbit turds. usually there are 5 or more balls at a time. it has been happening on and off for about a year, but lately its all i get!

Pour some maple syrup on it and serve it fer breakfast to your cheating wife

my poop is BIG ok i cant fit all my poop in my toliet

I'm sure, Joey.

I have been having semi-flat poops lately and it is because they have been very soft. Your anal hole is more ovlongular in shape and when your poop is very soft, it doesn't open your bottom all the way and it creates a more flatened shape. However if you wait an extra day between bowel movements, then you will have a normal shaped poop, i certianly do.

P.S. I like to have almost diarrhea soft poop because:
a. its bigger
and
b. it feels better when i poop my pants(i do that allot, but on intention) or my diaper (im a diaper lover)

--May all your poops be soft and suqishi

I happen to poop in shapes that look like animals...sometimes letters...once a smiley face! I just think it is so funny, I laugh like crazy - all to myself! I wondered if this EVER happened to anyone else anywhere in the world? ... I just had to find a website that I could ask someone! Please let me know if this ever happens to anyone. It sure makes going to the bathroom a little more fun!

As mentioned above, softer poop will be shaped by your anal muscles, which aren't perfectly round. Still, I'd get it checked out, meaning there is a chance for a colonoscopy. I have never had one, but hopefully I'll be knocked out first if I ever have to have one. I hear it's fun after the colonoscpy because you are actually told to fart a lot (air gets pushed in). I had a friend who had a colonoscopy and she talked about the farts and stuff. Just don't shart yourself!

_______
Practicing the ancient Chinese art of double flushing... because sometimes, a single flush just isn't enough.

Did we know what it means when u get the rabbit poo? Just I had it a few times recently and i was wondering if it was causing this bad back I have been having for the past 4-5 months. Are my innards to blame?

Hello Everyone...Guys and Girls...I'm 25 years old. I suffer from constipation. I've been constipated ever since year 2000. I've seen the doctor...many, many doctors. They can't find anything wrong with me. My problem is...I'm constipated with a very soft and sticky stool that doesn't want to come out. It take me forever in the bathroom. The stool comes out sticky and stinky like a mother-fucker. I can't just wipe it off with toilet paper -I have to wash my ass with soap or else it will leave a after smell if you get my drift...I'm tried of seeing the doctor...All they ever think about is having their nurse finger me in the ass or refer me to a gastro-doctor to shove his 4 inch camera up my ass...AND NO!!! IT'S NOT ENJOYABLE. If anyone with the same symptom please reply back. I'm sure in a hurry to get out of this shit hole. Thanks=)

Start eating more fiber. Metamucil, whatever. You are in need of more fiber.

What is your diet like?

_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

In England, "flat poop" is when some one shits in your apartment. Or was that "flat scat"?
_______
Sir SamDamnit!
The Emir of Crapistan
Join The Poop Reporter's Lounge

Ok, AC (9/27/06). I had the constipation with sticky poo, when I was under alot of stress. I recommend that you look into a colon cleanser. My prefferances are Dr.Natura, or Sonne #7. It will take a few weeks after the end of the treatment, before the sticky poo goes away.

Flat poo. Maybee your colon is part steamroller.

Seriously, if the flat poo problem persists, I would absolutley see a doctor. It can be a precurser to a more serious condition. Good luck, I wish you the best.
_______
Jammin' lo'flo's since 1977.

I'm also having soft, sticky poo that stinks really bad. :( help!

Poop is supposed to stink, dear.

The soft and sticky is better than hard and rocky.

I suggest more fiber, like fresh veggies and whole grains.

I'm usually a normal dookie taker with no problems. Lately I've been having all kinds of problems. Reoccuring UTI infections, hemmeroids, and pencil like poops. I feel bloated and like I have to go but nothing wants to come out besides these thin dookies. What is going on, someone have any information for me please?

I started LMAO when I first found this site. Poonurse, can u give me an objective opinion. I have been having problems with my poop, flat, black, extreme cramping sometimes (don't go often enough). But I also have autoimmune symptoms (feel worse than ever), suspected lupus and fibromyalgia but not definitive. I'm 47 female with history of stroke (19), precancerous cells, and polyps. I feel like something is seriously wrong as I felt before the stoke at 19 but doctors can be idiots-which I know you understand as a nurse. I'm a mental health case manager and know it's so much more than depression but that comes with the territory when u feel like shit! What specific tests do u recommend for possible colonrectal cancer? Can typical blood tests, i.e. CBC show signs of cancer? Thanks so much for your input!!

Flat Poop expert, here. I started having flat poop about 7 years ago... The doctor didn't seem alarmed about it even though he found colon cancer. I had a resection (removal of the right side) This is the side that is up stream from the bung hole. No spreading of the cancer was detected and I received no further treatment for it. My poop is still flat most of the time and I attribute it to a change in the poop muscle as well. Oh, on the constipation guy/gal.... dring an extra quart of water in the afternoon...each day.

Cheers

Love this site. I've recently had surgery for a bowel obstruction and I'm now experiencing flat poop, bloating and constipation. I was at at the dr.'s office last week ... Glycolax was prescribed. Did not help.

anyone ever think it might just be an internal hemorrhoid.

I have to dig out my shit,sometimes hard, often soft and sticky, with my fingers. rarely I have an almost normal bm except it is not complete, and I have to remove fecal matter of all kinds of consistencies with my fingers. I feel like a freak. had a colonoscopy, told colon in normal, except for a bit weak anal muscles and lack of neural sensitivity in rectum. My social life is zero. I am gassy and mucus comes out of my anus, sometimes with soft fecal matter. It is never normal- years since I had a normal bm. I can't even remember. I am 46. any ideas?

My poop has been flat for the last 3 months. Also about 2 months ago I was getting temedous amounts of wind (unusually smelly) and stomach cramps which caused me to go to the docs. The doc didn't seem concerned about the flat poop but put me on some tablets (Mebeverine) for the stomach cramps and wind treating it as irritable bowel syndrome. The pain and wind has now pretty much gone but the flat poop is still there (even when I went for the first time in 3 days). When I am 'well' constipation has always been pretty normal for me. I think if the flat poop carries on for another couple of months I go back to the doc again.

my poop went flat, love your website, i'm goin' to the doctor's...galen

some reason my poop looks like its been manufactured flat poop, not really dark, and i don't know how bright poop can get but it sure isn't yellow. it looks like a normal one just flat, and perfectly cut.

I think we should all pray to God about our sitations and for each other. He is the healer of anything and there is nothing that he can't do...even poop problems. Try calling out to him for healing. Father God, I just pray for everyone on this website looking for answers Lord God. I pray that we may be healed in Jesus name. I pray that these doctors find what our problems are and that you are awesome God and can heal us. We praise you and ask this in Jesus name we pray, AMEN! God bless you all! :)

I had an attack of Diverticulitus last September. I have most of my life dealt with constipation. My poop until recently was flat and sometimes regular colored and sometimes more on the yellow side. Lately I have been using Colon Cleanse with 100% pure psyllium husk and I love it. Sometimes the stool is very round and very long and then oddly enough, the second one of the morning is back to being skimpy and flat....I don't have insurance and heard that the colonoscopy can be very expensive...Am I on the right track here?

hi,

i have a question i have two rabbits and they poop like carzy but it gets stuck to there fur how do i get it off?

Ashley, that shouldn't be a problem; when Bilgepump pops them into the boiling water in the stockpot, the poop will wash right off.
_______
Hey! Don't touch my wenis!

So here's my deal. I went on zoloft a few years back this was only for seven or eight months. When I went on my poop got weird. When I came off it got weird again.

Now for the last year it has been very soft. It makes streaks on the toilet. Lately it has been very stinky at times as has been my gas. And let me tell you I have been having an insane amount of gas. I feel that the consumption of tomato products and spices don't help the gas. I almost never have a stool that doesn't stain the toilet on the way down.

My muscles have ached a bit lately too but I have been walking three miles a day.

I'm frightened of the doc.

HELP.

__To Thomas, currently on zoloft. When I first started it, had the same thing happen,- a monsterous amount of gas and changing poop consistency, finally went away. Personally, after eating "fat free" potato chips or doritos (with olean no fat cooking oil?), the toilet is stained from the poop I had - just plain discusting! Drinking too much alcohol can cause poops that streak. "Crystal light sugar free hard candies" and "sugar free" icebreaker sours cause me monster gas and VERY INSANE poops. I switched back to regular chips and real candy with all the sugar. Metamucil works great for me. Hope this helps and don't be afraid of the docs! _____
A fart is the lonely cry of an imprisoned turd.

since my partial hys. my poop has been flat,six months later,got the runs BAD,with pain in my left side, had colonoscopy,dr. told me [GOD MUST HAVE MADE YOU THAT WAY]right, you bet, dont have the runs to much anymore,although i still have bouts still,i still have that pain an getting worse,an pushing on nerves on my back,dont really want to go back to dr. with this problem,they may tell me again that god must have made you that way,sometimes i dont think drs. really listen,it really hurts,help, problems poopin,

Just wanted to contribute my flat poop experience. For the past week or so I have been having flat poop. There was alot of pain (felt like passing glass) and sometimes it had streaks of blood on it and when I cleaned myself there was ALOT of blood on the toilet tissue! Kinda freaked me out, so I finally went to the doctor. He put on a glove and felt around in my poop chute and said I have a bad case of internal hemorrhoids. He told me to use Anusol suppositories, to use medicated wipes after each bowel movement, and also put me on a prescription laxative called Glycolax to make the poop softer & cause less pain when it's coming out. It's been a coupld of days now and the pain is a little better, but my poop is still flat and I still have some blood. After reading some of the stories on here I'm thinking I should have also asked for a colonoscopy just to be safe. I am almost 38 years old.

I've had cuboidal shits before (long dirt snakes with 90 degree angles, much like a squooshed piece of modeling clay). Is this normal?

poop is gross like totally that is why i hold it in.

A.C from 8/7/2007...your comment was like gross totally and I wish you had held it in.

I've notice a groove about an 1/8" in my stool. It's ben happening for about 8 months now and the groove is always there....I've also noticed that my stool is a lot thinner these days. I've been having mild stomach cramps every day as well! I know I should go to the doctors but I'm afraid he's going to give me bad news. As time goes by I am more and more afraid of what can be causing this...has anyone else had symptoms like mine?

First off my father died of colon cancer and my
mother has diverticulitis. Second I had the
colonoscopy 5 yrs ago and had a polyp removed.
Third my next test was normal 2 yrs later. I
am not scheduled for another test until next yr
and I called about my FLAT POOP and was told
it could be normal but to come in and see the
GI doc and maybe have the test sooner. Fourth,
I have a long history of IB. Also, a long
history of a herniated disk in my low back,
anterior. Since I quit all pain meds, the
constipation has ceased and my poop has been
like after every meal. I also had my gallbladder out yrs ago. My anal muscles
have trouble in that I have to strain to go
unless I drink a quart of SUPER strong
coffee and then bingo out it comes. BUT,
lately, my non-diarrhea poop is flat. I
also have explosions. But usually just flat
poop after every meal that takes forever to
clean - like peanutbutter. I sometimes go
10 times a day.

Guys, does the flat poop comes out with every poop? Or does the flat ones come out occassionally?

Why are turds pointed at the ends?
So your asshole doesn't slam shut and wake the neighbors!

_______
You have the right to remain Silent but Deadly....

well, I have had all sorts of poop for the last two years. but to answer your question AC, I have a "normal" poo and then a flat poo. they are soft so I guess it is because of the anal muscle. I was really freaked out until I found this site. so thanks to all you folks that dont mind talking about the unmentionable. haha.
Last year I went on a raw vegan diet and pooped like 10 times a day! it was awful, who has that kind of time? it was thin and I was scared. then nothing. constipated.
so I started to take digestive enzymes and acidopholous with every meal and things normalized, but the flat poop scared me a little. I thought I might have a blockage or parasites or some other disgusting thing.

"MusicalFruit" is also an excellent moniker!

My condolences on the vegan thing.

GGG,(4.22.2007 post) I thought it was cats Bilgey used? I see he uses other furry animals too.
Producing waste since 1967

Hey, anyone here experience parasites? just wondering what that might be like.. symptoms and such. (I know, what a rude thing to ask!)

MusicalFruit,
You're on a site called "Poop Report", where people talk about the size, shape, colour, scent, consistency, and effects of their Fecal Movements, Flatulence, and Urination.
We have discussions on Monkeys that throw feces as an anti-personnel weapon. We talk about the best leaves to wipe with in an emergency. We educate on how to prevent AND cause the dreaded "Tijuana Two-Step".
If the subject of parasites is considered offensive, then you are worthy of our awe and homage!
Welcome to PoopReport, mate!

_______
You have the right to remain Silent but Deadly....

My mate was complaing of flat poops just a few says before he died of some horrndous ares related diseas! Be concerned, be deeply concerned.

Ive always wanted to go to Paris. Then I could see all the Paris sites!
_______
The Thunderous Crapper 63 Enjoying home toilet advantage since 2004!

last april, i saw a red string of blood mixed with a "normal" poop. it was on occasional basis and i'm happy that i don't have that blood since august. lately, my poop is semi-flat too just like the others. i don't know if i should worry a lot since i told my friend intern about it.

i poop EVERY DAY and she told me not to worry since i poop regularly. i was never constipated but there are times (maybe once every two weeks) that my thin and flat poop comes with liquid poop. i'm really really worried about my health. sometimes(maybe once a month) i experience stomach cramps and sometimes, after eating my meal, my stomach aches bigtime. it would last for about 30 mins.
btw, i'm 22 years old. my body is quite lean to average and i work out in the gym 3x a week.

my shit often looks like a hot air balloon. is this normal???? it always hurts on the balloon end if you know what im saying, sometimes my ass hole bleeds and i get hemerage!!!! whats the deal????
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Hello I'm 20 years old and I have some of these problems too... For about 2 years now I have had on and off blood in my stool some times and pain when I poop, I always thought it was a hemroid or something torn, but lately this month my stool is flat? and even time I use the bathroom its narrow or flat not round anymore? but at my age is this anything to be concerned about?

My symptoms have been happening for years. A tremendous urge to poop in the morning with a super soft, sticky, peanut-buttery, play-doh, like long drippy poo that will streak the toilet. It's usually 30 minutes to 2 hours after I wake up, so no real time do do anything active because I end up having to wipe my ass for 20 minutes.
I think I eat healthy, but no matter what I change in my diet, it's usually the same. I've been trying to hold my urges, to get the poo to clump together until the next urge. But still when I go, I have some left inside that won't come out no matter how hard I squeeze, but I know it's in there. Eventually, about 3 hours later, I'll get a few tiny turdlets to pop out. But between then, if I'm active, like playing softball or something, I have to be cautious of the slimy residuals making their way out.
I'm 30, male and 160lbs.
I'd never consider digging around for the leftover poo, but my doctor said that soft is normal and not to worry about as long as it's not diarreah. However, my doctor is retarded, and I don't trust him.

hey, I'm 19 years old and I've been having trouble with my stomach and my poops for about a year now. I wake up every morning with severe cramps and diarreah. I have diarreah about 5 times in the morning before I can even function and go on with my day. At night , I have really flat, green ribbon shaped poop that smells really bad. So, I went to the doc and had a colonoscopy and found out I have mild colitis. He said that the ribbon shapped poop wasn't a big deal, only that there was some stool in the way that was causing it to come out in that form.

So now, I'm having severe heartburn where it hurts to drink water. So today I
had an egd, and come to find out, I have severe esoughogitious, with scarring.

My advice is, is that it doesn't hurt to get it checked out. You don't even feel the snake go up your butt... The worse part of the test is the prep before. Talk about explosions.

My poop comes out round when it is of normal consistency (smooth and slightly soft), but flatter when it is a bit softer than normal. The normal turd is just hard enough to retain its shape and push the anus open to a round shape, thus the round (cylindrical) turds. But the anus is a sort of slit when at rest, so if the poop is soft enough it makes the anus open enough to let the poop out but nonetheless shapes it upon exit so that it is narrower and flatter.

I have had a colonoscopy a time or two, and the doctor was very careful and considerate, so that there was no pain. It was even interesting as she made a running commentary as the lens progressed through my colon ("teensy polyp there, nothing to worry about"). As others have remarked, the worst part was the prep, drinking all that awful solution, then having major explosive movements, and finally even slight leakage for an hour or so after that; messy. After the colonoscopy it took a couple of days to build up enough stuff in my system for a good b.m.

Nonetheless, in sum: The colonoscopy is not painful, and even the runs beforehand and the lack of (some) privacy during it are not enough reasons not to have it done if symptoms warrant. At my age I'm supposed to have it done every few years anyway.

MSG, thank you for the reminder. I need to schedule a colonoscopy soon. It's not the procedure, rather the prep that scares me. My poop is already the consistancy of cake frosting, and I shudder to think what an enema will do.

After a bout with pain killers 8 years ago and killer constipation (3 days!!), ever since I have had more or less flat stools (more oval-1" x 7/8"). No blood, no cramps, long soft stools (12-16 inches). Every time I pooped for years, occasionally I felt something exit the anus, then suck back in when I finished my crap. But that quit a long while back. He said it was probably internal hemorhoids from the horrible pain killer induced constipation episode.

Anybody else have this symptom or rather experiences. Other than this I feel great, run everyday, exercise a lot, eat right, etc etc.

that sounds messed up! maybe you got worms, most people have worms.

Speak for yourself AC, I know that my poop shoot is as pristine as the nearest drainpipe. Worms? hmmmpf, I tell ya, some people!
_______
like a constipated accountant- I worked it out with a pencil.

Would that drainpipe by any chance be called
the Thames?

Im a 25 year old male and have had supposed IBS for ten years now i can even remember my first attack, painful crampy spasm bowel movment. Ive had flat stools for a long time about half the time then every now and then picture perfect stools with no pain. No blood until a couple of weeks ago, has the most painfull attack/episode yet. Bright red blood (about 1/4 of a cup) all over and shitted out about 10 pounds of somewhat normal looking stool. Extreme sharp stabbing pain in the left abdomen about 4 inches below navel. Crampy gas. Went to ER and got sched. for colonoscopy, nothing noted on x-rays they didnt even say anything about them actually. Doc came in and shoved his fingers up my asshole (painfull, same thing as when fingers jabbed in your ass for a prostate exam) with some kind of blood testing patch and of course came out with blood. Couple days later for colonoscopy took all of the glycolax prep as directed and didnt even have a bowel movment until the afternoon the next day. Still formed but came out like little worms pale brown color lasted for a couple of days with no pain. Now that my stools are forming again flat, but with the sharp stabbing pain returning. Re-scheduled for a colon. next friday, i suspect it has to be some kind of major inflamation or polyp or somthing. My other medical problems: supposed prostatitis as of the past year prescribed levaquin. Depression/suicidal mainly because of pains.

Experienced soft flat poo for about 18 months. I have to drink a lot of water because of stone in lower part of kidney. I understand a stone in this position can cause flattened stools. Also if your 40/45 plus an enlarged prostrate might cause a flat stool. As long as there is no obvious blood discharge or probs with constipation I wouldn't freak out over it.

Hey, im 18!! i consider myself fit surf 2/3 times a week. For the past few months my stomach has been playing up, no cramps or anything just i get anxious and nervous really easily even though i no i shouldnt be and it makes me go to the toilit few times a day and b4 i go to work. Now im really scared coz its like thin pencils or sorta like round balls, wtf could it be? should i see a doc?

What does it mean if my poop comes out in several one inch balls? Sometimes it is all stuck together in one mass when I am constipated. Other times it comes out as several balls. Any ideas??

Take up golf.

When your poop is round it will be able to circumnavigate the bowl. If it clumps together, that constitutes a small fleet like the Nina, the Pinta, and the Santa Maria. When you flush it round poop knows it will discover a new world of poo or maybe China.

If your poop is flat it will be afraid of getting to close to edge of the bowl for fear of falling off. Flat poop believes that if it gets flushed past the known regions of the bowl that it will tumble through space for all eternity.

HB, this is the second time I have found a poster, referring to poop in the third person and therefore giving it a personality. Question: Do you name your poops individually, almost like children?

_______
Did I just fart?.... Oh shit! NO!!

Anthropomorphized poop? I'll give it a shot.

Roy, I remember when you were just a small gurgle passing through in my duodenal bulb. Even then you out shone the others. How quickly you distinguished yourself from your siblings, shoving them out of the way or consuming them in your burning desire for freedom.

I tried to placate you with Spanish rice but you laughed and merely added it to your train. Can I ever forget, when you filled up my cecum, the angst ridden speeches you gave announcing your adolescence. Those fiery announcements of wrath, so loud, so hot, caused me to question the wisdom of asking for extra habanero sauce on my burrito. Why Roy, did you have to be obnoxious?

Your constant brazen threats about how soon you grow too big for me to handle. Promising that you would take unilateral action to gain independence from the confines of my rectum, you scornfully dilated my ani internus demanding immediate release. Then it was my turn to teach you a lesson.

You may have had your way with my G.I. tract but the last ring, my anus - MY anus - is made of solid iron forged by the Cyclopes of Tartarus. Now here you are wallowing in the bowl. Good riddance Roy, you bastard child, it is off to the great brown kingdom in the ground for you. My ass might be on fire but relief is just a wet-wipe away.

Blimey! Anthropomorphized poop.

_______
Did I just fart?.... Oh shit! NO!!

I also worry about my poo. Sometimes peanut buttery as described. Sometimes little rabbit poo balls Sometimes what I believe a normal poo to be. But my problem is gas..... They are so smelly and frequent. Had that test too outrule cancer colon and negative result. eat well 75% of time. Drink wine most nights. love veg and fruit what is within normal limits

I have a 1/8inch groove in my stools too, should I worry, my partner felt inside and said there was a lump there.....

ive always had constipation trouble but lately (about a month) my poo has come out looking like it came out of a pastry tip....all the way around it looks like it had grooves in it like a star shape. Ive had a colonoscopy years ago bc of constipation. im 43 years old, 141 lbs. female and don't exercise. don't eat that great but not sure if like everyone says when the poo is hard enough to keep its shape it does come out normal but i have had several star shaped poos too. lately bloated not any more gas than normal

thanks for everyone's comments. I have an appointment today at 2:00 to have my flat poop problem addressed. I'm 52 and have avoided having the colonoscopy for two years. Now that I've been having flat poop for a long time, and reading all the comments, I'm finally making my appointment for the colonoscopy too. I'm not as scared to go to the doctor today....so thanks everyone who contribuited to this forum.

My son is going on 4. He has been constipated since birth, and has always struggled with bowl movements. He gets so backed up that I need to give him regular saline enemas (ususally about once a month)to help him get it out. I have taken him to the doctor multiple times, and his doctor keeps telling me to give him Miralax and more water. We had an incident a few weeks ago where I ended up taking him into the ER. He was so backed up that he was 'messing' his pants constantly...(kind of like skid marks, but a little more). He also was having bad stomach pains, and had diarhea. The ER doctor did an x-ray that showed he was really backed up, and let me know that the reason for the 'messing' was that there was backed up stool, blocking all but the soft/diarhea(sp?) mess that came out in his underpants. They recommended magnesium citrate, which I think cleaned him out pretty good. He hasn't beem having the accidents since. I have now started to give him fiber tablets as well as the Miralax daily, which has been helping to make the poop softer. Even though it's soft, he still struggles soooo hard to get it out, to the point where his poor little face turns red and he starts crying. I don't quite understand why it could be so hard to push out soft poop? Lately the softer poop has been very thin and kind of flat. He has an appointment with a GI doctor in a few weeks... but in the mean time, I am VERY worried about this "pencil thin" poop. I've been reading up on colon cancer and such. It's kind of scary. I was just hoping for some advice.

Stay on top of thins, obviously, Mommy, but if all the kid has known as far as pooping goes is excruciating pain, he associates with that, and struggles not to poop, because it has ALWAYS caused pain in the past. He'll get over it eventually, is my guess, but as I stated at the beginning, keep an eye on him.
_______

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

Goddamit! Bilge, what a brilliant bit of detective work. I would have banged on about water intake etc. but really its about association - move over poo nurse, theres a new shit in town.

_______
Did I just fart?.... Oh shit! NO!!

To Hum Bunger:
I just have to say, "Anthropomorphized poop?", ... GENIUS!! You are truly an artisan. Thank you for that epic poem. And I would love to see your poo- a work of art, I am sure. Maybe a gallary showing some day???

Worried Mommy, my daughter was that backed up once. The poop was in ribbons becuse it was formed in her intestines. Don't worry just yet.

He also might be having trouble pushing the poop out because he's got a little case of mega colon from all the distension or stretching his colon out. He could also have a sensation problem - too much and he freaks out or not enough and he has to poop.

Prune juice snuck into his food and juice a bit at a time will help, too. Use positive reinforcement for pooping and most likely this will pass.

_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

Dammit! Daphne steals the crown from Bilge, and heads out west at a rate of knots.....

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Did I just fart?.... Oh shit! NO!!

Just a few comments...I have had every shape and size there is, but most of the time it is of the flat variety, but it has been that way for as long as I can remember(32 y.o), and rarely have problems going.
For all of the posters who mention their various issues, I haven't seen anyone suggest the possiblity of food allergy/intolerance causing your issues? Wheat and diary intolerance are very common, making it rougher on your digestive track to deal with. Your body will have a progressively tougher time dealing with foods it is not equiped to handle the further you age away from your phyical prime.

I've had a crazy month and a half. It started when I woke up vomiting and had hives on 85% of my body. Then the next week I was vomiting and had extreme diareah (spelling). I actually lost three pounds. I stayed in the bathroom for an hour at a time. At one point I believed I was vomiting fecal matter, but I'm not sure. I thought I was going to die. I started vomiting while in the bath tub and thought I was going to suffocate. I couldn't sit up. Then within the next week I was so constipated that I was having labor-like pains. I woke up about 1:00 am, in extreme pain. I had almost regular "contractions" for about 8 hours. By the time my parents came to pick me up, I was in tears. Most of the night I was considering waking my roommate up to bring me to the hospital. I was amazed, however, to discover that the body really does know how to give birth naturally. With every contraction, I naturally brought my knees to my chest and felt the urge to "push" (poop). Of course, I never did get to poop. Anyway, my mom, a doctor, bought me some suppositories and I did feel better after a couple of hours. I fought my mom on using the suppositories because the anus is "out only", but it was the difference between feeling better in hours or days. But most recently, when I have the urge to have a bm, it HURTS! It hurts just as bad as my contractions did when I was constipated! It's been HOURS since my last bm and my butt still hurts. I know that the matter is so "fat" that it is having trouble going through the anus opening. How do I fix this? I know that I have identified my mother as a doctor, but I actually don't go to her if at all possible. I was at my last resort when I was in tears because of my stomach. I also can't get an idea of how big the matter is because when I am able to push hard enough, the matter is pushed well into the toilet. Any suggestions would be much appreciated. This is much less embarrassing than talking to my mother.
Thank you

You don't mention your diet. If you're not doing it already, try more high-fiber foods, and drink a lot of water; these make the poop softer and easier to push out. Ask your mom the doc about Metamucil or similar products that bulk up the poop and make it smoother to pass. On my high-water diet, I have smooth, easy poops and only occasionally need to supplement the diet with extra fiber (I get enough in the fruits and vegetables I normally eat).

For about 3 months now I havent been able to goto the bathroom without putting a ton of pressure on my bowels.
I either have to actually stick my hand inside my butt and get the poo out that way and its always very sticky (it actually sticks to my insides) and GROSS!
I've had an enema and that fixed things for 3 days but thats it.
What could be wrong?

Sounds like a fiber problem. Try Metamucil and double your water intake - fiber only works when you drink enough water to make it swell. Otherwise, you clog yourself up more.

Do you eat alot of fast food/processed food/meat products/cheese? If so, that might be the problem.

Try to eat fruit for breakfast every day this week and see if it helps. Oranges, apples, etc. It works wonders for me, and the energy boost is amazing. Better than coffee!

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.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

Hmmmm pain with poooing, swelling, shape, bleeding, fissures (cracks in skin that bleed and hurt) Guess what people who are sensitive to night shade (plants that grow at night , tomatoes, potatoes, egg plant, peppers are night shade, Corn is a partial night shade) these can cause all those symptoms. cut them out for a few days at least 3 and see what happens .. then see what happens when you add them back in if you dare. Oh Corn is in everything basically now our diets are loaded with it. corn syrup, citric acid (corn made), corn oil, corn starch. yougurt has it, most sweet things, citric acid is added to preserve foods no it is not oranges, lemons or limes most citric acid used now a days is made from corn . Gift from china .. along with some of their other not so nice food stuffs. corn syrup tested in mice produced delayed male testicle development, livers like alcoholics, exploding hearts, death to fetus before birth.

for sure, cashews cause light stools, almost white with some people

Lately my poops all come out with about a 90º bend in them, whether they're skinny little softies or big strapping logs. Does this indicate some problem in there – a growth or blockage of some sort?

Stick your finger up your ass. If it is bent when you pull it out, you could be in high demand. I, for one, would hire you to get check ups from a few doctors who have been particularly rough with me during anal exams. There'd also be a huge potential clientele among revenge-seeking former prison inmates.

LJ, the finger is very flexible and may not be that accurate. He needs to stick a piece of
3/4 inch rebar up his ass. If that comes back out with a 90 degree bend, I would be impressed.

... and Uri Geller and his spoons would be out to pasture.

Ha ha haaaaa 3/4" rebar!
Now thats funny!
I'd be impressed if it came out with a 90 degree bend, but I'd be even more impressed if it came out flat.

A suggestion for the original bloke who pumps out flat turds:
Try spreading your cheeks...

bent ones, actually your poops having an angle to them might indicate a colon problem. I've read that poop with a tiny hook at the end is indicative of a severe colon deformity.

If you have trouble pooping, I sincerely recommend getting a doctor's appointment. If not, then, well, maybe you just like math?

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.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

Has anyone else tried going low carb? I did and it made a big difference in my bowel movements. Very little to no fiber is best too since we do not digest it but bacteria do and bacteria are what cause most of these problems. Carbs are pathogenic. Try low carb for 2 weeks and see the difference. Conventional doctors cannot solve these problems.

so i have flat poo too and i just cannot deal with going to the dr. again, just had hip surgery and i think i have decided that my flat poo is some kink in the system, am going to try fiber as another dr. on a website suggested, cuz there is like no healty food in my diet... have spazms in my system, but just cannot deal with the possibility of cancer so going to try other stuff first. thank you, lmao as some of these posts, and YAY to the person who prayed for everyone, there should be more people like you...

Here's the deal. I have been in pain for about 3 days. I started off being able to poop. It came out soft. I feel like I have a big one stuck up there that just wont come out. It hurts for me to fart. It feels like the fart has to try and get between a big terd and my rectal wall(I guess that'w what you call it) I don't know what is going on in there. If it is something in there I want it to come out. I should mention that I have a problem w/ internal hemorrhoids. I don't know maybe they are swelled up in there and got me feeling like I need to go. I just want to fix it.

Re flat feces: Try this. Eliminate all probiotics from diet, including yogurt which should only be used when there's diarrhea. Take a sizeable portion of green veggies with plenty of fiber at each meal. 1/2 hr. after meal, enjoy a naturally sun-dried fig. See how it goes in 2-4 weeks' time.

Oh wow, i see flat crap is common. but ive had it for a looong time. sometimes i feel as if my dung is tied to something in my upper gut. I feel a pulling when i deficate but the pencil thin poops dont pull out the rest of my "full feeling". so pooping 6 times before noon isnt normal? should i get a butt camera to check things out????

Agree with Anonymous Coward (not verified) -- 01.23.2009...

Low carb should help somewhat. Bread is hard for the digestive tract to digest. You might also consider cutting out dairy for a while and see if that helps. Probiotics may help, but a previous person mentioned eliminating them for flat stools. Perhaps he is on to something. I had them for quite a while then something happened and they were fine. Unfortunately the last several months my digestion is poor again. I became lactose intolerant, have alternating flat stools, and the stools dont always seem adequately digested. I'll try eating more stuff like figs, cutting out more junk, and replacing some probiotics (for the lactose intolerance).

Well, when i poop flames come out. And im not even sticking a lighter anywhere near my ASS. Other times its just an explosion, like a hand grenade going off between my anus and the toilet bowl, followed by a machine gun fire of pellets. Can anyone explain this activity, other than some kind of post tramatic stress disorder?

Poop Traumatic Stress disorder?

I have an update: still doing the pro-biotic, but I cut out bananas. I've been eating at least 2-3 per day and I read that it can interrupt your digestion and cause an imbalance of calcium. After 24 hrs of not eating any I already noticed a difference. These last 3 days I've had regular healthy feeling BM's (does a little tap dance).

Hey guys, I have some problems.. since last few years, my poo has been soft , sticky and it floats. In last 6 months, on 3 occassions , I found bright red blood on my toilet paper. I am getting a colonoscopy done on 12th May 09. ...Hope it works fine...

If the poodiatrist could answer a hijackers question:
if it's the flat turds only appear on and off in amongst "pebbles" and "sausages", is it still something to worry about?

Try this for an instant clean-out...(be at home when you do this)put 2 tablespoons of sea salt (Celtic or Baleine) in 32oz. of warm filtered water and drink it all up in one sitting. It is hard to take, so you can add real lemon juice to better the flavor. You will likely have many movements (unless you are seriously impacted) and after a few movements you will pass mostly water. Do not use reg salt as it does not have the minerals or sea salt. You do not absorb the salt, so no need to worry about bloat.

For a long time now, when i crap, it never comes out in 1 long sausage type piece, it is usually 3 or 4 pieces, some long, some short. no nlood or anything. ive been dealing with internal hemroids for a long time, which have been banded. i had a colonopsy but were not able to finish it because of the pain. the doctor said they went 77 inches, which is just past the sigmoid area..should i be worried???

Anonymous Coward.....My colonoscopy was not comfortable but it also was not painful, perhaps you could be more heavily sedated to eliminate absolutely all pain from the procedure. I am a little confused by the depth you say the doctor went to, 77 inches. The colonoscopes used by most clinics are 170cm in length which is 66.9 inches. I would trust the doctor and not worry unless I was told there was something to worry about.

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Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

AC, it is centimeters. He was 77cm inside. It makes sense. You need to go get another doctor for a second opinion. Ask for anesthesia assisted colonoscopy of your second opinion. 77cm is not very far and there is no reason why you should be not pain free during the procedure. YOU STILL HAVE TO FIND OUT WHAT IS BEYOND THE 77CM. of your colon. I'm not saying to worry. I'm just saying be wise. You still don't know if you HAVE anything to worry about. Besides, your question about the pain at 77cm of colon should have been asked of your physician. He is the one that was up in there. How would we know?
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...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

- 40 yrs old male, Severe IBS (irritable Bowel Syndrome) since I was 14 yrs old.
- I have been experiencing flat poops on and off for the last few months - it happens while straining to pass constipated poops... I suspect I have enlarged internal hemmorhoids again, and they are the cause of flat poops - Nevertheless, I recently found an article in a peer reviewed report saying that this could be a much more serious issue than hemmorhoids - I am taking this seriously, especially considering my very long term symptoms of IBS.
-I had a similar problem with the doctor during my last sigmoidoscopy with the scope getting to a point where it would go no further, and his pushing of it to move it past the constriction was considerably painful.
-I have since had an appendix removed.
-I have conducted further research I am in no way convinced that the Sigmoidoscopy is a sufficient proceedure for IBS. (Especially since it was through Kaiser.)
-I am now planning on pressing the issue with the doctor until he arranges for a complete colonoscopy [with full anesthesia] into the lower half of the small intestine.

-In my opinion (based on observation and personal experience), many doctors (especially HMO) seem to want to go for the most common diagnosis to avoid commiting to anything they don't fully understand (and the insurance doesn't want to cover.)
-As a patient in a health care world where the #1 priority is to cover ones ass, we can give our thanks to charlatans, lawyers and malpractice lawsuits; for it has unfortunatly become our responsibity, as paying patients and clients of money driven-coverage stingy insurance companies, to harass our doctors to be comprehensive and thorough in their work.

___________________________
In search of better living through healthy elimination

Just a thought...
Is it such a big deal if the poop is not tonally correct?
I'd prefer my poop to be flat, rather than sharp.
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The white zone is for loading and unloading only- FZ.

I've had flat poop; at times I've had shart poop (at least it felt so, and occasionally I had little spots of blood on the paper); but what I really like is C Major poop--all natural.

Round poop, flat poop. I'm tired of these boring shapes.

Does anybody know where I can get a flat strip of dies for my asshole like the ones on a Play-Doh pump?

Some star shapes might be nice for a change. I read about one up there somewhere.
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Every poop is not to be told to every body.

Poot, you beet me to the play doh reference. You might also try the Mattel Vacuform.

anyone get pieces of veggies in ur poop? suddenly i cant eat lettuce it shows up in my poop undigested?never had this before oh yeah ate an eggroll and non of the vegie crap in it digested could see it in my poop otherwise it is like crunchy peanut butter what the hell i used to take huge monster logs few years ago oh well i just turned 40 so....

I keep an eye on lettuce poop because the size of the bits indicates how well I have been chewing.
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Every poop is not to be told to every body.

Poothagoras.....Your problem has been solved. Somewhere in the Poop Report archives there is an answer to every poop related question. So you're tired of the traditional round poos that extrude from your butt? Our intrepid and much admired leader Dave, tested a device several years ago that is exactly what you need to make the shape of your butt mud more pleasing to the eye. Yes, you are looking for the "Turd Twister"

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Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

LOL! Thanks, Chief, that is great! Sadly, no testimonials on the website or comments on Dave's report refer to testing. This is so amusing that a trial of my own may override my OCD and germophobe inclinations.

To Dave and authors of similar Reports: Your dedication continues to inspire and impress me.

To ChiliKahKah: I laughed that you already visited that report!
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Every poop is not to be told to every body.

Hi chaps! calling from Dubai! this site made ma laugh as I like toilet jokes! anyway Im 45 and have always had odd bowel habits, often constipate in cycles but get there in the end. Also have a splash of IBS and a dash of flat stools! and thin one's but never all the time! its just a glorious mix, like a mixed nut bowl, only its crap and sometimes a little curved at the end!. Can I ask that if there is a problem ref obstruction would this flat stuff happen all the time and just get worse as fibre tends to sort it out for me, however its turns me into a deadly fart person! almost immediately as my system fast tracks it out! A problem like flat ones should be ongoing as mine are not, yes or no do you think! Bless you all from sunny Dubai

Expatcrapchap....You are in an excellent location to enjoy lots and lots of falafal, if anything is capable of keeping one regular it would have to be fried cakes made from ground pulses.

I am certainly not a doctor, I am a hillbilly,
but I think if the flat poops are not consistent that would be a good indication that there is no internal blockage. If fiber sorts it out for you then it is certainly recommended
you consume lots of fiber. Falafel, by the way, is one of my favorite foods, next to roast possum.

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Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

What the heck is falafel Chief and does grilled possum taste like chicken? I have only ever had possums for pets and we never ate them.
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Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

Habibi you are most welcome ref the falafel which as a chickpea based food item is butthole bicep fantastic. I will continue to monitor the situation as it slides out and will most probably create a crapflow chart in order to track, best vertical turd market day. I yearn for the good old days where crapping took hours and sometimes needed a heavy spoon for assistance however as one gets older the luxury of floating out a warship becomes less and less. Bless you from the land of camel toes and sand.

Dear Mrs. MC As our "Habibi" ExpatCrapChap points out falafel is a fried chickpea (garbanzo) patty or ball that has been fried. They are very popular all over the Middle East and as far as fried foods go they are healthful, also delicious. If you want to add these little jewels to your cooking repertoire here is a recipe.

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Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

I eat hummus eventhough chickpeas make my bladder hurt. I don't eat it as often as I would like.
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...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

A question:
Do you lot (Americans) eat kebabs?
Over here, and in Pommyland too, they're the food of choice for shift-workers and alcoholically-affected club patrons in the early hours of the morning.
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The white zone is for loading and unloading only- FZ.

BM.....I can't speak for all Americans but one of my favorite foods is the Japanese version of the kebab, yakitori, I have them on the menu for tomorrow and can hardly wait.

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Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

Ahaaa... Very tasty-looking!
No, sorry, I was referring to the doner kebab, which is a few slices of beef/chicken/mystery meat, with lettuce, cheese and onion (plus any extras as requested) all wrapped up in a Lebo bread.
The meat is stacked on a vertical barbie spit arrangement, cooked with electric heaters and sliced off as required.
My fave is chicken with hummus and chili sauce.
There are some good pictures on Google Images, I just need to learn how to do that link thing.
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The white zone is for loading and unloading only- FZ.

I really should muster up the courage to try hummus. Looks good enough, not sure how my gallbladderless system would handle it though. Thanks for the tasty recipe Chief, you know I love me some fried foods!
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Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

BM......Is this what your talking about, it sure looks good to me.

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Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

ummm.... no, not quite, but if you turn that picture sideways, it looks like a girl I once knew.
Have a look at this one for a better idea...www.sydneykebab.com.au . The photos on their front page depict what drunk Aussies love after closing time.
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The white zone is for loading and unloading only- FZ.

Wow, BM, they look super yummy. I don't remember ever seeing anything like that anywhere I have been in the US. Maybe Chief knows where to get that kind of stuff here.
It sure would be fun to eat my way around the world. I have never been out of North America before.
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Every poop is not to be told to every body.

Hello.

I want to ask if I should be worrying about pencil thin poop. It started a couple of days ago after 2 nights of eating steamboat. I think I got a tummy upset, and on the first night I went 3 times, and had softish poop. The third time I went, hardly anything came out except a short strand of pencil thin poop.

Today when I went again, my poop while coming out felt like it came out in pieces, and it sank pretty fast so I didn't get a good look at it :( But the bit I could see was another short strand of pencil thin poop, at the top of the rest of the poop (last thing that came out I guess). But I could see the poop these couple of days have been slightly thinner than usual.

I'm 22 years old, and extremely hypochondriac if that's any help.

It`s the same here, BM. Brits love a post session kebab after closing time. A pitta bread full of grease and mystery meat eaten just after barfing up 15 pints of lager over the pavement outside the kebab shop. The other drunk`s favourite is chips (fries) with curry sauce.

BM, T-Box & Poothagoras...I just spent a few minutes doing research on kebabs and have come to the conclusion that they are about the same thing as a "gyro" that we get in a Greek restaurant here in America, meat that has been formed into a cylinder and grilled while turning slowly in an upright position then shaved off and stuffed in pita bread with a variety of other things. My favorite by far is spicy ground lamb treated in this manner.

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Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

Anonymous, the trick here is to back track and verify your previous few days diet, if this has just happened then keep an eye on it. May I suggest a lovely few days of bran flakes with raisins! this should help, if not bran supplements and others are available. If like me this helps then doubtful you have any blockage. Also I dont drink enough water so maybe for you to. Give it a go and report back in a few days with your crap flow chart. REF HUMOUS this is wonderful and a great binder! if not tried it guys get stuck in! DONT FORGET THE LEMON! There is another with a chickpea base and chillies and lemon and garlic! forget its name but it is quite extrodinary! Phoot! My release last nightwas firm and normal! Thanks to the god like bran!

Oh man drunk or not I love the lamb gyros we have here. DROOL...you owe me a keyboard Chief.
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Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

Chief, I have had those before somewhere. Lamb is the BEST, but I don't know where to get any around me. All of the local diners (even those owned by Greeks) have chintzed out and only make them with beef or chicken. Fu**ing Pikers.
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Every poop is not to be told to every body.