weeks without a poop

// // 225 Comments
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ pointsk 500+ pointsl 100+ pointsm 1+ points - Newb
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Shitaholic asks:

I haven't pooped in a few weeks. I was wondering how long can your poop stay inside of you without causing you health problems.

(Editor's note: actually, Shitaholic asked: "hi i havent pooped in a few weeks i was wonderin how long can ya poop stay in side of ya with out cousein u health problems tankz shitaholic." Kids these days!)


Dear Shitaholic.

Poop is meant to be expelled from the body on a somewhat regular basis. Normal can range from 1-3 times per week to 1-3 times per day. Everybody is different to some degree, but regardless of what is considered "normal" for you, nobody can hold poop in the body for more than a week without developing potentially serious health problems.

The simple fact that you say you have not pooped in a couple of weeks indicates that you are already experiencing health problems, or have no concept of time. It is unhealthy to not poop.

If there is a blockage preventing the poop from exiting via the normal route, then there is a good chance that you could experience abdominal cramping, bloating, perforation of the bowel and fecal vomiting in the near future. There is more room out than in, and poop is destined to come out eventually.

Without knowing anything about your diet, I can only suggest that you make sure that you are getting plenty of fiber and drinking at least eight glasses of water each day. And you might consider getting a calendar so that you can keep track of how many days have actually passed.

I hope this information has been of some help to you, but if this problem persists you should definitely see a real doctor.

Motherload is Certified Nurse Assistant as well as an IBS sufferer, which means she knows a lot about poop. Got a question for her? Ask it here.












225 Comments on "weeks without a poop"

Double Flush's picture
k 500+ points
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As it stays there, it's only going to fester and get larger and cause problems. You will start feeling very full, then it starts hurting. In extreme cases, as Motherload said, it can come back up and you essentially shit out your mouth; it's not a pretty picture. I recommend you get to a doctor NOW. This is a very serious problem.

If you absolutely insist on trying it yourself, try an enema or a suppository, though a week old poop might have you too bunged up for that to work.

_______
"Double the flush, double the fun" --The Amazing Anus

[Insert witty banter here]

Dave's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content Moderatora 10000+ points - Super Pooper
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"Nobody can hold poop in the body for more than a week without developing potentially serious health problems."

I agree. But another fair statement to say is this: if you are holding in your poop for that long, it means you've already developed some serious health problems.

Laxative abuse can cause this. The slower poop moves through your system, the more it dries out. So you turn to laxatives to, and it becomes a vicious circle: the more you use laxatives, the more your body relies on them and the weaker the peristaltic muscles (the muscles that push the poop through your colon) muscles, and the weaker those muscles become, the more you find yourself relying on laxatives. Eventually your peristaltic muscles will atrophy, and then you're screwed.

sharty mcfly's picture
l 100+ points
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dave, that sounds terrible. and why would you not poop for a week anyhow?

yours in time,

Sharty Mcfly

jaw's picture
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hi please go to the doctor get help you are risking your life by not taking care of it
poop has to come out and dont play games with it
look people can die from this and have
thanks
mkg

Northy's picture
l 100+ points
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Jesus Christ, if it has actually festered inside your gut for that long, can you imagine the size of it?

Bilgepump's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points
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I can't go without for more than three days before I start freaking out...I'm so regular I set my watch by bowel movements...maybe I'm a little anal....JEEZ, thats funnu, I crack me up...oh see there, I said crack, did it again...damn..I'm funnier than shit..uh oh...hehe, there I go again...ooops..."go" get it???

"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

Bilgepump's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points
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My apologies for thta last comment, I was being a turd....oh hell, it just doesn't stop!!!

"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

the log of hazzard's picture
l 100+ points
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First of all, you must have some really bad health problems right now if you haven't shit for a few weeks. See a doctor dude. It is possible you might pass out from the pain of the cramps.

Acually, I was planning to do an experiment to see how long I can hold my poop in. After what you put in, there is np point.

Oh, and I'll kill you if you don't give us a picture of it when it comes out.

Some are born crappy, some achieve crappiness, and some have crapiness thrusted upon them. (Do NOT be the last one)

Delusional's picture
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My uncle jack died from not shitting for a long time; he was old and in a home. The docs said he died because he was impacted. Death by shit, a laughing matter, as long as it happens to someone else. I thought he actually wanted to die, so I guess it was a shitty suicide.

doniker's picture
j 1000+ points
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Fecal vomiting....I never heard of it but I found this:

"Fecal Vomiting is a special kind of vomiting in which fecal matter is expelled from the colon into the stomach, usually due to a blockage in the large intestine, and then subsequently forcefully expelled from the stomach up into the esophagus and out through the mouth and sometimes nasal passages. It is quite an unpleasant experience, as one might imagine, and is sometimes referred to as misere."

Good Lord....the human body is a crazy thing.

Poopaloopas's picture
m 1+ points - Newb
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Glad to hear that three times a day can be considered normal. Knowing my girlfriend only goes a few times a week, I thought my hat tricks were unhealthy.
When I hear "fecal vomiting", I think of that South Park episode where they eat through their anuses and poop out the other hole. Does fecal vomiting comes out as a log? If so, that's a choking hazard... and I can only imagine my mom trying to explain my death by poop-suffocation.

Double Flush's picture
k 500+ points
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I would expect your stomach acid would break it up, making it into shit soup or puke diarrhea--again, not a pretty picture. South Park is a really good show in my opinion, but some things that they portray are obviously fake.

_______
"Double the flush, double the fun" --The Amazing Anus

[Insert witty banter here]

GottaGoGirl's picture
i 2000+ points
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Um, Dufya, it's animation. It's like the definition of fake.

AssBlaster2000's picture
PoopReport of the Year Awardj 1000+ points
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What fun would South Park be if all the things it portrayed were real?

Durrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

videoCWK - Too lazy to join's picture
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You haven't shat in weeks? Damn, make sure you post a picture when it finally comes out. This thing's gonna be huge! Also, try taking a laxative.

Fart Poopie's picture
j 1000+ points
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Call me skeptical, but I think this person wasn't really having any problems taking a dump, but they were curious as to what would happen if a person didn't poop in a while.

charming's picture
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you have to go to the doctor like today and find out whats going on please do it no one can go on weeks with out pooping food comes out for resson and you can get very sick or die get more fiber
thanks
good luck

GottaGoGirl's picture
i 2000+ points
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Great, thanks. A website for charming.

Double Flush's picture
k 500+ points
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[Lame Comment!]
I can think of a few more people who could use that site, GGG. You know who they are.

_______
"Double the flush, double the fun" --The Amazing Anus

[Insert witty banter here]

Fart Poopie's picture
j 1000+ points
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Good for you, Charming. Don't let a silly thing like punctuation hinder you from getting your point across quickly, and efficiently.

GottaGoGirl's picture
i 2000+ points
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Denis Leary is my hero. I have all his albums.

NeedToKnow's picture
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I've heard of people who do not poop for months at a time, maybe even 3 months. I cant understand it cant be possible can anyone tell me for sure and show me real proof that there is no way someone can go months without taking a poop, it would really help me sleep better at night thank you.

Poopzilla's picture
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I've actually gone a week and 6 days without a poop. In '96 I had a bad car accident and ended up in hospital with a broken femur and pelvis. After the operation they started feeding me stool softeners and inserting suppositories. Nothing seemed to work. I ate a ton of dates and figs for 3 or 4 days and still nothing. At about the 13th day the supervising nurse came in my room and checked my chart. She winked at me and said "I'll fix you right up. Be right back" 5 minutes later shes back with a pint glass of the this clear liquid she called "Cleanser" I drank it down and she turned with a huge smile on her face and walked out of the room saying "when you need us be sure to ring". Well 10 or 15 minutes passed and I was sure this stuff wasn't going to work and then all of a sudden I felt this huge pressure build up in my abdomen. Seconds later the loudest most disgusting sounding wet fart escaped my buttocks and I hammered the call button. She must have been waiting in the hallway because it wasn't more that 30 seconds before she was beside my bed with the poop chair. She grappled me out of bed and threw me in the chair and before I knew it i was in the bathroom hovering over the shitter. By this time my abdomen was alive with wild gurgling and loud roars. I felt quite a bit of pressure down below so I gave a slight and tentative push and WHAMOOO! Houston we have Ejection! Man it felt like I had just shit my entire innards out. Nothing was solid. It was like my ass was puking. Just when I thought I was done another wave of liquid poop hit and it went on for what seemed an eternity. After a while I was just down to drips and weak farts and she knocked on the door and asked if I was done. I weakly reached around and flushed and she came in and went about cleaning me up before I was put back in bed satiated and satisfied.

Moral of the story. if you have a bad bout of constipation find the oldest most expierienced nurse you can find. I'm sure if you ask her nicely she'll hook you up with some "Cleanser"

POOPADOOP's picture
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the whole fecal vomit thing would be enough for anyone to go see a doctor...ive heard of talking shit, but the literal meaning is much more disturbing

john C.'s picture
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Poopzilla? do you know the name of the "Cleanser" that you were given and can it be found over the conter, or do you need a scrip from a Doc?

Anonymous Coward's picture
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Hey all, i too couldn't go for over a week, and went and got an x-ray and was way blocked. my docotor sent me home with an over the counter Oral Saline Laxative, by fleet. it is a 3 oz bottle of clear liquid and pharmacist said that is what he took before he got his colonostopy. Anyway, that and warmed prunes and prune juice, and citrucel are my best friends now. Don't recomend you use that saline all the time, just if it has been a week. well...

Anonymous Coward's picture
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i have gone now for about 13 days without going poop, and only gone maybe once a week for the last month- constipated due to my medication. today i took a liquid saline laxitive drink about 2 hours ago... still nothing, i havent had much cramping or bloating..... so weird. my only goal for today is to poop.. its so sad. i would much rather be at the beach, this is so ridiculous :(

Anonymous Coward's picture
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Okay, I was wondering. It has been the 4th day now that I have not pooped. I am wondering what is wrong, and if I should go see a doctor. I have been eating lost of fiber, and drink water lately and yet still nothing. This has never happened to me before. =[ What should I do!?

Anonymous Coward's picture
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I haven't pooped in about four days but I'm lactose tolerant so I'm just going to drink some milk and that should fix me right up

Anonymous Coward's picture
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I currently have not pooped at all for about 11 or 12 days. I tried laxatives, nothing. Stool softeners, high fiber diets, smooth move tea, drinking lots of water- nothing. I went to the doctor today and they took xrays of my abdomen and my intestines are entirely full of shit all the way up past my ribcage. They sent me home with the aforementioned "clear liquid" mentioned in some of the above posts which I drank a couple minutes ago. Hopefully I'll be shitting very seriously in a little bit, if I don't, I will probably have to go to the hospital and have it manually removed.

I'll update in a minute on whether it works or not

Anonymous Coward's picture
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he never updated os is he still alive

jimmy d's picture
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i havent pooped in three weeks and its killin me,im so bloted.what will make you poop for real

The Thunderous Crapper 63's picture
k 500+ points
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jimmy try drinking some nice BIG GLASSES of ICE COLD water. I do that first thing in the morning and I am good to go, literally. Try that first before you try the hard stuff like milk of magnesia or Ex Lax. Then of course if that doesnt work there is always the DREADED apparatus (enema).
_______
The Thunderous Crapper 63 Enjoying home toilet advantage since 2004!

AHHHHHEMMMMMMMMMM JUST CLEARING MY THROAT!! ;)

RoboCrap13's picture
l 100+ points
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Anybody need to call "Roto Rooter"???
_______
You have the right to remain Silent but Deadly....

You have the right to remain Silent but Deadly....

Anonymous Coward's picture
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That poop must be 10 or maybe even 11 Curics

Anonymous Coward's picture
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I went for 23 days without crapping once.
It was very painful, and my only goal was to take a poop.

As for the guys that can go for months, its mainly monks in and around china, was well as Asia minor specifically India;

they eat close to nothing, so not much comes out; consequently they don't have to shit for long periods of time:)

king crapper's picture
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hi i havent crapped in over six weeks, i have a bad habit if keeping it in for long periods of time i need sugestions

wonderpance's picture
Comment Quality Moderatork 500+ points
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you need to go to a doctor.

and quit holding it in for long periods of time.
_______
i love poop.

i love poop.

Bilgepump's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points
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My suggestion is don't do that anymore. Pick your nose instead, its a much better bad habit, and far more pro active.

"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

MattDedo12168703219's picture
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My Name is Matt Dedo i haven't taken a poop in 1 month 1 week 2 days and i am scared.. the doctor says if i cant force one out they will have to do surgery and give me a collostamy bag. Forgive my spelling. i would like to know if there is anything that i can eat, do, sleep with, touch, read, etc. to make my butthole drop a load.

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points
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Read some more of this site! There are "nuggets" of wisdom everywhere. And thanks for reviving this thread - it gave me a chance to re-read it and to remember that there's a thin line between a well-intended comment or warning about grammar and being just plain condescending.

_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

MSG's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points
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One big problem people have these days is time--not enough time to sit on the pot and let something happen. I think the value of the daily habit is not as well known as it used to be, and schedules are so tight that some people just don't set aside a period of time to poop. Regularity has to do with more than peristalsis, and regular pooping deserves its own time of day. With such a regular time, people might not get into these bad situations.

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points
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You are absolutely correct. Times have changed. I am sure Ward and June Cleaver took many a relaxing dump. Possibly together, chatting in the bathroom. Those were the days!

my friend's picture
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I love holding it for about a week, and then using about 3-4 enemas. It feels great. Or sometimes, after holding it for 3-4 days, I lube up a couple of fingers and stick them in there and break it up and then pull it out. If feels sooo good.

Anonymous Coward's picture
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Awww....poop.
All ya need to do if you're a guy, 16+ is go out on a date. Go to a movie. Get the big bucket of corn. I mean the *big* bucket. Eat it all. Next, take the date out to a "Chinese restaurant". Ya know, the kind with live chickens in the back and the unisex "washroom/mopcloset". You'll know it because it won't have a door lock. The stool knows what to do. If you're a gal, just get dressed up, go to a club with real crowded bathrooms. Fuggetabout the liquids, x-rays, you don't need all that. Just take master Da Poo's advice.

sittingpretty's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points
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I don't understand how holding poop in can feel sooo good to some yet feel so painful to others. In the past when I had to hold it in, it sucked back up so high it didn't come back for weeks. Not a good habit people. You will live to regret it. Trust me, I know. All that holding in crap that I've done all of my life has caught up with me early. Do you want to be told the only thing that can be done for you is to cut the whole large intestine out? NO? Then get on the pot and let your bowels move!

...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points
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There is a saying "ignore your teeth and they will go away". This doesn't apply to poop.

jaws420's picture
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i have not went poop in a few days and my stomach is starting to become bloated and full and i have been thorwing up here and there and i was wanting to know if i should be worryed and get doctors help?

Holly's picture
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When I was 16, I once went 3 weeks without going. I was diagnosed with IBS with constipation later. Not very fun at all.

nonpoopergirl's picture
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i havent pooped in over 10 days and ive tried everything...laxitives, enema, the supository things...EVERYTHING! i just need to drop a shit please help =( i look like a freakin fat cow from all the crap i have just sittin in my stomach and its all just pillin up and i dont wanna have crap vomit cuz that just sounds sick HELP!

Squat-n-leaveit's picture
Comment Quality Moderatork 500+ points
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2 spoons of salt in a quart of warm water. Drink quickly first thing in the morning. You will poop!

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points
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Fecal vomiting leaves a shitty taste in your mouth.

_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

Postman's picture
k 500+ points
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How can you go that long without shitting? I go more than two days I feel like I'm gonna explode.

Powersoak's picture
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Excuse me for asking, but if someone had a fractured femur and pelvis, how could a nurse yank them off the bed and have them hover over the toilet? And if the patient was not screaming in agonizing pain, he or she had enough pain killer to certainly stop up the works.

jim donny's picture
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hi im almost 15 and i havent been able to go for a little longer than a week, im begining to worry because i dont wanna experience fecal vomiting or anything like that.whenever i feel like i have to go its just gas, and whenever i try to go its just a tiny bit and only can do it like once or twice a day. please someone help me

Schmelm I. Phartz's picture
m 1+ points - Newb
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I used to have MAJOR issues with constipation. I would literally only go once a month, and for that day I would be completely incapacitated. My Dr. just said that "everyone is different - some people don't go as often as others." What a jerk. I did my own research and completely changed my diet. I can set my watch to my BM's now.

A few things you need to ask yourself - #1. Are you drinking enough water? And I'm talking WATER, not soda, beer, etc. My rule is that we should be drinking half our weight in oz. per day. SO. If you're 120lbs, you should be drinking 60oz of water. #2. are you getting enough insoluable fiber in your diet? Look at the labels on things. Women need 25g of fiber daily, men need even more. #3 - consider taking a probiotic supplement for digestive health.

Lastly - what's your daily ritual like? Do you not have TIME to take a crap? If you don't, make time.

Since I've made these changes I no longer am challenged by constipation. Just pay attention to your body a bit more and you'll take a crap.

If you REALLY want to go, though... my recipe for a super poo cocktail flush is about 15 prunes, a GALLON of water and a cup of VERY strong coffee. WATCH OUT!

chick's picture
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I was born with constapation problems, they once called it withholding sydrome, have anybody ever hear of it? I have been prescribed every thing on the market for constapation, senacot,Milk of Magneia, miralax is what i am currently taking, and it is only supposse to be a low term medication, but i have been taking it for years, does anybody know of any long term negative side effects of it. Nowdays, i can go weeks and weeks without having a bowel movement, sometimes, i go so long i dont even remember when the last time i did was. I feel it is causing issues inside, if i can hold my movements for that long without much pain, i dont really think about it, until it gets so bad, that i start having pain, i think i have stressed my intestines out so bad, that, that is how i can hold so much in without any problem.
I need to know if any dr. could correct any of it

Squat-n-leaveit's picture
Comment Quality Moderatork 500+ points
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Hello chick. At the risk of sounding new age. Do yoga. Hatha yoga, Bikram's yoga if you can find it. (and afford it!) Now. at the risk of sounding Nike. Just do it!

Anonymous Coward's picture
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Hey all, I'm a 19yr old male, and I am just getting over an external hemorrhoid. Since the riod appeared a week ago, I had not pooped since maybe a day or two before then and when the riod appeared I didn't go because of the pain of the roid. today is day 2 since I started taking metamucil tablets, to help loosen things up. I do eat alot of cheese and I like to drink milk daily. Sometimes I have good habits and sometimes I go a few days without one. I'm not hurting but I KNOW I need to poop. What else can I do to get things moving along and as painless as possible for my still sensitive bottom? Also a question about the metamucil...Will it soften the crap already in my bowels or just the crap after the fact? Thanks.

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points
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If you can stomach it, switch to soy milk, too. The calcium is more readily resorbed into your body, and it will not stop your works up so much.

If you want Metamucil to work, you MUST DRINK LOTS OF WATER. The fiber needs water to gel, and this is what causes your bowels to move along better.

I hope you get some relief.


_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

Anonymous Coward's picture
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Same 19yr old guy here...I FINALLY pooped. Not much but its a start for the week of not being able to. Seems I probably could have, I just had to push like a mofo. I had felt like going for a few days now but when I'd get on the crapper It just felt like a blockade in my anus, and now I see why...The two big hard turd balls were a bigger than golf balls! It was quite a struggle to get em out. All puns aside when I got off the toilet and checked I was shocked to see bright red blood in the toilet along with the poop. Now like I said I had an external hemorrhoid, that had bled some when it got really painful. Anyway after I got cleaned off I wet a washrag with warm water and cleaned myself up real good(no baby wipes on hand). There was no more blood after cleanup, and I have not had any rectal bleeding since I got my roid under control 4 days ago nor do I have any history of ever bleeding from the butt. Hopefully the next bm won't be as much of a task since I've started increasing the fiber, and since I started back drinking water again alot(used to drink only water about 3yrs ago). My main question now is should I visit a docter about the blood with my crap, or should I only worry if it becomes a common thing? Sorry but just one more question...I love my cheese and milk but it appears they are helping to stop me up, so what can I do to help counter the cheese intake? Thanks all, and thank you daphne for a quick response to my other comment. Peace Out.

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points
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Well, I'm glad that you broke the damn, but ouch!!!

You and I share a love - we both love cheese. If I ever feel like I might eat myself into a blocked tunnel, though, I eat my cheese with Triscuits (or the WalMart generic "double cross") crackers. It's impossible to eat cheese on these things and not poop.

Also, I like jalapeno peppers. If you like them, too, the pickled slices on the cheese are a great mover and shaker.

Good for you for upping the water intake. One of the body's biggest advocates is water. It helps you flush dead and useless body material like old blood cells, to aid in your liver and kidney's plight to keep you toxin-free. Sure, water helps you poop, but all in all, it's important in many ways.

As to your butt, keep on drinking water and have oatmeal for breakfast the next week while avoiding orange juice and acidy-spicy foods; and if your butt is still bleeding/sore, see your doctor.

With your butt, the old addage that prevention is the best cure reigns supreme. Drink that water, have your fiber, don't strain, and don't be afraid to indulge in a daily coffee or caffeine aid if needed to get the plumbing fit.

Listen, if you really can't stop the cow's milk, then maybe you should balance the scales. Try one glass of diluted Metamucil for every glass of milk? Look at it this way... if your bowels adjust to this, you can write a poopreport of how it affected you and send it to dave. (dave@poopreport.com).

P.S. I just realized you're way young enough to be my son. Dude, I'm so freaking old.


_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

Anonymous Coward's picture
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im take prescription drugs and have hemmorhoids on my butthole and am constipated i tried stool softener and it works but it is slowly not working anymore i havent pooped in 10 days because it hurts my roids to squeeze what should i do

Anonymous Coward's picture
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Hello all,

I cannot stress enough the importance of taking an ENEMA (yes, enema!) if you have gone more than a few days without a poop. Really, you shouldn't wait more than a couple days.

Yes, I know people think of enemas as "embarrassing", and perhaps even old fashioned. I myself prefer to use the dreaded enema "bag", as opposed to the small disposable Fleet enemas I suspect that those who have said an enema didnt't work had used.

EVERYONE should have an enema bag, young or old, and not be embarrassed to have one or use it when it's needed. I have used mine many times over the years... It's not unpleasant or painful, if you are at least sort of used to them. If you've never had an enema, you should try it before you do get bound up... So you will at least be prepared. (If you are otherwise healthy it shouldn't hurt you taking an enema without being constipated. In fact, most likely you will be surprised at how much you had to "go", when you didn't think that you needed to go!)

I actually enjoy taking my enemas. My enema bag hangs on the bathroom door on a clothes hanger and I'm not embarrassed to have it out. Yes, I've even been asked about it. Hey, everyone poops... Owning (and using) an enema bag shouldn't be any more embarrassing than owning & using a toilet!

stop-and-stare's picture
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I have had a problem all my life, I'm 18 now and its only just stopped. I have gone 2 months without a bowel movement before, and I had to go to casualty, I don't know how I managed to do it but lets just say I was in a very bad way!

Anonymous Coward's picture
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I haven't poo'd in 4 days and i don't feel like i need to... though at times i can feel it poking out a little, i go to the toilet and push but nothing happens. im scared, and im going partying this weekend... maybe that will do it... a whole lot of alcohol

Anonymous Coward's picture
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I havent had a poop in over 2 weeks and ive just started getting little stinging pains on the right side of my belly,now i dont feel really bloated nor full,i dont know what is wrong but i just want to stick my fingers up my butthole and pull out the shit,i jus came back from holiday and over their i was shitting every single day and it was like runny shit aswell,back in england i cant shit at all,i want the runny shit to come back and haunt me forever because i want to shit and i want shit now,it feels like theirs a massive ball of hard dry poo blocking and when i try to squeeze it out it feels like something is going to pop inside of me and my stomach just blows up and i cant feel the shit move or anything!! i just want poo out now or ill leave it and LET IT KILL ME BECAUSE I CANT BE FUCKING ARSED WITH THIS SHIT ANYMORE

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points
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Ac, your problem is that England is so full of shit, there isn't any room for yours. Take a train over to France. They're full of shit too, but will probably make room for yours.

Anonymous Coward's picture
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HELP ME!
I haven't gone for ages! about 2 to 3 weeks!!
The pain is killing me. I can feel it blocking up inside of me and I may start to experience encopresis soon. What changes in diet or things that i could do myself do you suggest? PLEASE HELP!

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points
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AC, at your point I would suggest ingesting some small explosive charges.