Do you drink a lot of purple gator-aid?

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Number One . . . I order you to take a number two.

Ugh, sorry for short posts, I am donating blood at the moment

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Number One . . . I order you to take a number two.

No purple Gatorade. No dietary changes. No trips outside the country or drinking from streams, lakes, gutters, porta-johns, etc.

No pain, excess gas or anything other than green, runny shit.

What you're describing isn't unheard of - but what I've read about in the past, these have been fatty and white if you squish them. I'm afraid I don't have any more information for you, but if you do a google search ("Bean shaped things in feces" "White faty deposit in poop"), you'll see that you aren't alone. In fact, some of the links you'll turn up will bring you back here.

As for the colour... can't help you. Bile is green, and sometimes my snakes have green poops, but that's as much as I know.

Before my IBS diagnosis, I also had to ladle the bean soup into three jars. I believe it is necessary for performing seperate tests. I can agree it's not a pleasant task. I also suspect food coloring. As for the lump, you should inform the lab/doctor. Good luck. I guess "going green" is not good in this case.

you're commenting on green runny shit while donating blood?.....very interesting. I bet the round thing in your shit was the tracking device that the aliens implanted in you and you managed to shit it out.
But seriously I don't think you will need the object you shit out back. Do you have any other symptoms other than the green shits?
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Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

maybe its just a gall stone, did it hurt? pooping a stone though,,hmmmm. Did you take any identification photos? good luck.

no other symptoms besides green, RUNNY (sometimes watery) shits.

and the alien implant had occurred to me. I though it might also be an egg from some alien species, although I don't recall being raped by an alien.

Runny, do you take medication? It could be the casing of your medication or it could be a bead. Have you ingested any Mardi gras beads lately?
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...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

Bless you, child. The aliens from the third moon of Jupiter have selected you as the incubator for their Human-Titanian hybrid experiments. That green shit is the amniotic fluid, and the little green turdlet is the alien's post-incubation spore.

So, when and where did you see Elvis?
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Yo quiero Taco Bell.

All hail Runny Greenshit! All hail Runny Greenshit!

He is the father of the new race. He should be revered and venerated for all the ages.

(Hey, I have no medical stuff to contribute, so....well...)
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To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.

Technologist, not technician. Say it to a tech and they'll have your head.

A technologist would one who studies technology, a technician, executes technology. Lab techs are technicians.

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The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

Now I am confuzzled....I was a Tech sergeant in the Air Force but neither studied nor executed technology.

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Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

Chief, in your case, you'll have to consult that oxymoron, Army Intelligence.

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The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

Does this mean that I, singlehandedly, lost the Vietnam war ???

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Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

Well, I didn't want to point the finger, buddy, but...now that Mcnamara is dead, there is no one else to blame.

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The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

Bilge, are you saying that the Army is a bunch of morons or actually intelligent? ...Or is the Army cleaned of any intelligence with the power of oxygen?

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To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.

You might want to check the Hot Guy's pit bull poop. It may give you a clue.

Runny Green Shit, how long have you been pooping green? Have you noticed any lumps before? Personally, I doubt you are sick (or that anything major is wrong with you) but I am glad you are being safe / smart by going to a doctor. Do you take any multi-vitamens, supplaments, herbs? Can you give us an examle of your daily diet? I would suggest keeping a food and poop journal for a week. You would be surprised what those things can reveal. Please keep us posted as the doctor gives results.

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Number One . . . I order you to take a number two.

MMC, yes. I was commenting on green runny shit while donating blood. I primarily read poop report on my blackberry while walking to / from work and while in the bathroom (which may explain most of the typos). I was walking to work and noticed a red cross blood drive van parked on the side of the road. Figured what the hell and decided to donate. It takes about an hour (including all the paperwork) to donate and I had a lot of waiting time. The comment was posted while the needle was in my arm. Gotta do something to pass the time.

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Number One . . . I order you to take a number two.

how did it end? most definitively it wasn't a gall stone, since they are produced in KIDNEYS and in the gallbladder, neither of which connect to the black eye.

Man, I'd kill to crap like that. My turds are like small rocks and require 30 minutes+ of pushing to remove.

Kind of reminds me of the time I had to help my boy-friend at the time with his stool samples. It wasn't quite as exciting as shitting green fluid with little bean shaped things in it, but I'll tell you when both of you can't see the prospect of digging around in the shitter is quite interesting not to mention trying to get it all into those little jars they give you. If they could just figure out an easier way to get it in.
"I'll shit when I please, not when you tell me to." Nelson Mandela

I had a particulary watery movement this morning and found a few of the little nuggest floating on top. Summoning the necessary courage, I managed to pull one out with a wad of TP (it helped a little, but still got one stinky finger).

Squishing them revealed that they are, in fact, white and cheese-like inside. So maybe they are fatty. I didn't have the courage to taste them.

So, is this normal?

Runny, sounds to me as though you have a case of clostridium difficile bacteria running amok in your gut. This can be caused by you having taken antibiotics for something recently or from having been exposed to someone else that is symptomatic of c-diff.

There are different strains of toxins used in identifying the bacteria which is why more than one sample is requested for testing. You could test negative for one strain but then find out after another more in-depth test that c-diff is definitely the culprit.

Your slimy grape turds are most likely mucus balls caused by overproduction of mucus due to irritation of the intestinal lining by the bacterial overgrowth.

While you wait for your lab results, it wouldn't hurt to run out and get some probiotics. You could try Activia yogurt, or some acidophilus tablets that you can find in the vitamin section at your local pharmacy or grocery store.

If you do test positive for c-diff, you will most likely be prescribed a strong antibiotic. It is VERY IMPORTANT that you take the medicine exactly as your doctor prescribes and completely finish it even if the symptoms clear up. Not completing the course could result in the bacteria building an immunity and becoming resistant to future treatment. Left untreated, c-diff can be fatal, especially in the elderly or immunocompromised individuals. Good Luck.

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Always looking out for number two!

Do what she says, Runny, she is our Poo Nurse.
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The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

Years ago, I was given a big (2 pounds or more) plastic jar of those brightly colored after-dinner mints. I kept the jar between the front seats of my van, and munched voraciously (3 or 4 at a time--I love mints!) on them while I drove as long as I didn't have anything else to eat, until they were gone. It's a wonder I'm not fat, but I noticed within a day or so that my poop took on a distinctly green tint, rather than its usual brown. It also went from the typical firm logs to a very soft-serve consistency. I quickly attributed this to the mints, although they were white on the inside and had no green or yellow to mix with blue to make green. I wasn't worried about it, and found it rather novel to be making green poops, which ceased shortly after I had devoured the last of the mints. I suspect this is all coincidence, but the description of the lumps in Runny's shit bear a strong resemblance to the size, shape and inner color of those mints. I would not forgo proper medical attention, nor would I dismiss the possibility of a large source of irresistibly yummy mints!

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Keep up the crappy work!

I still say the lumpy thingies are pills.
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...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

I say its cheese! Rennet schmennet, this dude's his own creamery. What will you call it runny?

Squeeze it cheese.

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To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.

Smellveeta

He could call it The REUSE GREEN CHEESE. I still say its pills.
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...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

Update:

I finally got in to see a gastrointerologist (sp?) for a full colonoscopy.

They tell me that I have ulcerative colitis, which is probably related to my ankylosing spondylitis (arthritis of the spine).

After observing closely, I think the grape-shaped objects are metformin pills that I take at night. But they are probably 4-5 times their original size. And what is the white, cheesy substance inside of them?

BTW, the color changed from green to very, very dark brown and is now a light brown/green mix.

The doc has me on 1 gram of sulfasalazine 3x daily. Hopefully this will help clear things up.

The stuff inside the pill is what is left after the medication as been removed from the pill, like a filler of some sort.
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...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

Runny, good luck with all that. Honestly. None of that can feel very good.
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To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.

Update: The sulfasalazine didn't do much. My movements got to the point of being almost pure liquid. It was like pouring muddy water into the toilet.

The gastroenterologist put me on samples of something called Asacol. It is supposed to be similar to sulfasalazine, but more effective. I was on it for a week and it seemed to help a little. The consistency became less liquid and more like gravy or maybe even pudding. Even after I ran out of samples, it stayed that way for 2-3 days, but then it was back to the screaming squirts.

The rheumatologist gave me an injection of two steroids (can't remember the names right now) and put me on oral prednisone. Gradually, my stools started to become semi-solid again. For a few days, my poop, although not what I would call "normal", at least resembled turds.

Now, for the last couple of days (after decreasing the predisone dose as prescribed), I've got diarrhea again. And it's green again. Not pure liquid, but about like it was when I first posted my story.

So, I'll called the rheumatologist on Monday. I'm encouraged by the temporary improvement though and hope that I just ate something that disagreed with me.

Thanks for all the help. I'll post updates when I have more to tell.

Perhaps a St Patrick's Day prank by a buddy !