TO: Dave
FROM: Teresa
DATE: 1.13.02004
SUBJECT: pictures
==============================
I seem to recall that you'd like to have pictures of people wearing poop report shirts at famous landmarks. I bought my 11-month-old granddaughter several poop report clothing items for Christmas, and we took her around and made her picture. The best I could do for a famous landmark was Churchill Downs in Louisville, KY.
You may recall an unfortunate pacifier incident that allowed her to be Poop of the Week back in October. I printed out that page from your website, and we are saving it to show her date on prom night.
TO: Dave
FROM: chris jankoz
DATE: 1.8.02004
SUBJECT: for the blog
==============================
8====D <---here's your poopdick for today.
i got a good story for you
one day i was walking around the house and i had to take a shit really bad so as i was headed inside my house, my dad told me to come into his bedroom so he could show me something. So i said ok i walked into his room and then he began taking my pants off and rubbing my asshole so he rubbed his weiner on my butthole he shoved his 14 inch dick straight into my poopshoot. i got poop all over his dick and on his bed but he told me that i got to lick it all off or i have to take a big ass ramming again until he got tired. thats the story of poopdick thanks for listening to my true story
TO: Dave
FROM: ac froyd
DATE: 1.12.02004
SUBJECT: intellectual poo
==============================
I think that Elvis tried to sneak in some references to poop in song, like in "Hound Dog"- I always thought he sang "You ain't nothin' but a hound dog, crappin' all the time". My parents told me he sang "cryin' all the time", but I think they were wrong. Likewise, in "Suspicious Minds", I always thought Elvis sang "I'm caught in a crap, I can't walk out, because I love you too much baby" as an ode to a toilet. Can anyone else find secret poop references in songs?
TO: Dave
FROM: PublicEnema#2
DATE: 1.11.02004
SUBJECT: eternal debates
==============================
if you were stranded on a desert island,and you could only have 1 type of turd,would it be a corny turd,or a nutty turd?
TO: Dave
FROM: steve
DATE: 1.13.02004
SUBJECT: poop in the office
==============================
Where to begin.. My tale starts with the CFO or the man that creates toilet fried rice in and about our porcelain wok(mens toilet) on a daily basis. On the rim on the back on the seat on the floor for gods sake.. To make it worse Sometimes I think hes part yeti because of all the pubes on the seat.. Last count 9 on the seat. LOL. thank god for clorox wipes.....
TO: Dave
FROM: Aaron
DATE: 1.13.02004
SUBJECT: poop story
==============================
I walked into a public rest stop somwere outside of portland oregon. Obveously i was there to "releive" myself. I was standing and the toilet when lo and behold there was a pile of $h!t on the floor, so i peek into the stall next to me, boy that was a mistake, there was $h!t EVERYWERE! like someones @$$ exploded! it was so fricken gross yet a good story to tel my grand childeren (if i ever have grandchildren)
TO: Dave
FROM: Poop master poopy
DATE: 1.4.02004
SUBJECT: poop story
==============================
Ok i was sitting there and the bathroom was so small you can hear what goes on outside so just when a bunch of snotty brat girls walk by i yell awesome two floaters ( Floater-a poop thet floats when it in the water) so they heard and i still to this day am mocked for it. but i sit behind one of them in lunch so when i had a peanut butter sandwhich for lunch i took some toilet paper with me put some of the peanut butter on it and squished it to her foot HA sweet revenge (and some detention but never the less revenge
TO: Dave
FROM: todd ward
DATE: 1.15.02004
SUBJECT: Ya can't crap wid out rap!!!!!
==============================
Pooptastic! It's da bomb!
Blow up yo car set off d alarm!
Pooptastic! It's da bomb!
Pieces of corn stuck 2 yr dong!
Interesting? There is a whole song. Email a snailmail address.
Flush once 4 da bulk n 1 4 da remainder,
Big Daddy Doo Doo aka. Count Poopula
TO: Dave
FROM: Poop master Poopy
DATE: 1.15.02004
SUBJECT: poop story
==============================
Ok so i run cross country and every saturday we have a meet somewhere far away and the only place to crap is port-o-potties and trees normally i use trees but that just works for peeing unless there is no other way to go. so im walkin around with my friends and eating and so on after my race and dont youknow i had to crap. the por-o-potty was about a half a mile away and i had to poop so thats pretty far with a poop on the verge of coming. But i make the long trecherous hike and my friend runs in right before me. so i wait like a good friend and then i go in i pinch offf a HUGE loaf and it was a WET one i mean 50 wipes only i look over to find one piece of toilet paper just one i wipe what i can and miserably walk around the rest of the 6 hours i was there getting strange looks from all the people cuz im walking like a turtle a wet butt-hole turtle
TO: Dave
FROM: anonymous
DATE: 1.17.02004
SUBJECT: for the blog
==============================
When I was in 1st grade, I pooped my pants. i didnt want to tell my teacher, so i didnt. Then ,at lunch, the lunch lady said "Oops, did someone poop?" I said yes, and she took me to my teacher, who called my mom and made her come and bring me a pair of underware. When i put them on and went back to lunch, I realized that people had followed me to the classroom and i was branded for life!
TO: Dave
FROM: emma lacie
DATE: 1.18.02004
SUBJECT: poop story
==============================
i weed on te seat which is not alot 2 wot u lot can doo!!!!!
TO: Dave
FROM: Mark Williams
DATE: 1.18.02004
SUBJECT: ask doctor adams
==============================
My poop tastes sweet, is this an indication a problem?
TO: Dave
FROM: Anthony Baronna
DATE: 1.18.02004
SUBJECT: no subject
==============================
Hey, I just saw you on Tech TV, Your site is funny as hell, thanks for the giggles (I needed it because of my cough lol) anyways keep the stories comeing, thanks,
TO: Dave
FROM: Carolyn
DATE: 1.21.02004
SUBJECT: re: ask poourse
==============================
----- Original Message -----
From: "Dave from PoopReport"
Sent: Wednesday, January 21, 2004 5:55 AM
Subject: ask a poop doctor
> Good news: your question has been answered!
> http://www.poopreport.com/Doctor/Content/diarrhea.html
>
> I altered the spelling of your name so no one knows it's you.
>
> Hope it helps,
>
> Dave
> PoopReport
I am sorry you find my problem amusing, maybe I am not as experienced as you seem to be.I was just trying to find a solution for a very serious problem and happened upon your site. I did not know it was a joke or I would not have put my name, thank you for removing it. Please do not contact me again, I know some people get a kick out of other peoples suffering, I am happy to say I am not one of them.
TO: Dave
FROM: John Miller
DATE: 1.23.02004
SUBJECT: poop story
==============================
One morning, I woke up with a bad smotach and I had to do my business. I went up stair to used the bathroom and it was preoccuiped with my brother. He was taking a shower to get ready to school, and I couldn't hold it anymore. I went to get some spare tissue and headed out the door to take a crap. Realizing it was raining, I went to take my raincoat and suddenly it was coming down heavily than the rainy. I couldn't stop it and I was embarrsment. Lucky, nobody saw me and my pant with full of shit. I went downstair and wait for my brother to get out, so I can take a shower. As soon, as he left for school, I went to the bathroom to clean up this shit. This was this embarrsement moment in my life. I had to tell somebody like I had to let it out. lol
TO: Dave
FROM: Ricky
DATE: 1.23.02004
SUBJECT: poop story
==============================
A story about Robert, one day my friends and I took a trip to Big Bear in CA, and my friend robert decides he needs to let loose in a bar bathroom, so as he is getting ready to unload, someone walks in the public bathroom, and him not wanting anyone to hear it, he stopped mid-drop, waiting there a good 3 minutes or so...in pain, the person leaves, he starts again..and another person comes in..and he stops gain...i guess he finally got feed up, cause he came out with a sad face..and said, "I didn't get to finish"..to this day he swears, he didn't Poop right for the next 2 days.
TO: Dave
FROM: Katie
DATE: 1.25.02004
SUBJECT: ask poopreport
==============================
For some reason poop makes me really horny. I can read this website and masturbate for hours. I look through stalls at school for unflushed poop and then I get aroused. Is this normal?
TO: Dave
FROM: Benalito
DATE: 1.28.02004
SUBJECT: shitting story
==============================
Hi Dave-
I stumbled on your site - laughed my butt off -
Here is a shitting story: I am married and lived overseas and but was having a long, hot and steamy affair- yes sorry- We went to Paris together for the weekend staying in a typical Parisian hotel- I can tell you that I saw and experienced more of this woman than any doctor ever, but there was no way I could shit in front of her or even with her in the same room. I think she felt the same way as she never did anything on the toilet the whole time. We were at the Louvre and the urge over took me. I went mens room and took care of business- when I FINNALLY came out I made up a lame story about a huge line and only one stall- Not sure if she bought it, but I felt better on both counts. Funny to me that I will always rember that fantastic museum, not for its art, but was finnally able to take a shit.
Thats it - enjoy
TO: Dave
FROM: Tommy Udo
DATE: 1.30.02004
SUBJECT: Poop for the national defense
==============================
Dave,
This week I visited the new Udvar-Hazy Center, a part of the Smithsonian Air and Space Museum. Attached is a photo of one of the most interesting exhibits.
Regards,
Tommy Udo
TO: Dave
FROM: Gruntbig
DATE: 1.30.02004
SUBJECT: poop story
==============================
Many years ago, my infant daughter of approximately 2 months of age was getting her temperature taken rectally. No sooner did the physican get the thing inserted than my daughter's face began to take on a straining expression and become beet-red. There was a tremendous "BLAT" and she shat the thermometer, along with a trailing stream of loose feces at least three feet away onto the examining table. At first we were all surprised, than general hysteria set in as we observed my daughter's look of complete satisfaction!
TO: Dave
FROM: D..................L...................T.
DATE: 1.31.02004
SUBJECT: ask poonurse
==============================
I EAT
POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP.
