PoopReport has a no-photo policy? Am I the only one who wants to see the digital picture of this green, twisted Frankenturd?

This story was pretty boring... Not much to it. You BF had a BM. I'm not impressed.

yep, definetly wierd how the toilet paper ball was away from the poo...very convenient if you ask me.

#2 Fan, yes you are.

The statement in this story that Asians are lactose intolerant made me suspicious. I thought, hmmmm, Asia covers a lot of territory, and a lot of the peoples within Asia seem to include milk products like Yak milk, yogurt, etc., in their regular diets. So, I looked it up.

Much to my surprise, I found out that Dr. Dennis Savaiano of Purdue University says, "Nearly all Asians and about half of Hispanics are lactose intolerant... about 70% of African Americans are lactose intolerant.”

Now that is some startling data. But, of course, being a Hoosier who’s into civil engineering, I believe 100% of everything that comes out of Purdue regardless of its percentage of bullshit content.

Dr. Savaiano goes on to suggested that individuals with lactose intolerance need not completely avoid dairy products, which are the primary source of calcium. "Yogurt tends to be well tolerated. So is cheese," he said. A glass of milk with food may also be tolerable, he added.

So, I’m left with the question whether the minimal amount of cheese one might expect on a cheeseburger would have anything to do with gargantuan turds. Personally, I think it had much more to do with the pork, chicken (if the greasy skin were left on), and the gross overeating that most like occurred at the various grub stations Shatty Cake and her BF noshed at.

But there you have it. And, Shatty Cake, if you were more descriptive in your reporting of the intricate details regarding the size, color, composition, character, smell, and sheer friggin' wonderment of that magnificent buttloaf, we wouldn't be left wondering whether a snapshot of the shit were necessary at all.

Regards, His Turdship.

Your Turdship,
Thank you for the enlightening statistics. Really, I thought the BF was just using the Asian thing as an excuse for the frequency and odor of his BMs. Note that he also consumed a milkshake --we split it, but it pretty damn big -- in addition to the cheese. I will examine once again the photo, and report back with more details.

post the photo on some other site and post the link here

I have a mental image of a log that looks like your BF swallowed a giant green pipe cleaner

Ive got to get it out of my head

ya, lets see the pic!!! How come the no-photo policy doesn't apply to the pictures of real poop on the PoopReport holiday gift guide page...why can't we post the picture here?

That's not real poop on the holiday gift guide. It's plastic. Buy one and you'll see. Heck, buy two, just to be sure!

How come there is a no-photo policy? I saw plenty of descriptive images in an article about "Pooping In Egypt", located at http://www.poopreport.com/Travel/Content/
Egypt/egypt.html

Photos are allowed, obviously. the rule is no pictures of poop. www.poopreport.com/about.html

The rule is no pictures of REAL poop. Real pictures of FAKE poop are okay. And pictures of pictures of real poop are okay (see, the dog doo calendar on the PoopReport holiday gift guide page). Although, that might be okay because it's a picture of a picture of dog poop. I'm not sure if a picture of a picture of real human poop is okay or not. Real pictures of real poop is indecent. But fake poop (or illustrated poop) is different because it's funny.

Actually, that's exactly how it works. Well said!

Ok, so I'm looking at the photo again. The buttloaf is of a dark green color, reminiscent of a fir tree. The main body of the creation lurks down on the bottom of the bowl, near what I guess you'd call the drain. The upper part reaches out toward the waterline and tapers off, making the whole thing roughly Christmas-tree shaped. However, it is not one solid turd but an amalgamation of long, intertwining segments. There are couple of lone, sausage-shaped elements floating freely.

The BF reports that the smell was your standard poo smell, nothing special there. Everything came out with more than usual urgency, but there was no cramping. "All I know is that my ass felt a lot lighter after I went," he commented.

I get green poop if I eat to much cake iceing. ok that was my 2 cents. by

TH, how would you explain Purdue basketball coach Gene Keady's hairdo? As wind-resistant engineering masterpiece or antiquated tribute to shellac?

Chuck:

That hairdo is the epitome of a greasy, car mechanic comb-over, aint it. I cant stand it when the game includes a lot of shots of Keady's reaction to the game because it is so distracting to see that rediculous, pasted-down whatever it is.

Can you imagine what kinda toupe Keady will wear when the last of his hair finally falls out and he has none to comb over?

He'll probably just have a car repair shop airbrush a facimile of his quauf onto his skull.

A naked, hairy guys ass is not indecent.
A realistic photo of fake poo (that looks identical to real poo) is not indecent.
A story about how crazy a digital photograph of shit is cannot be backed up with a real picture because that IS indecent. That's a fucked up policy.

Shatty, you mean you STILL have that picture? What, are you going to put it in your family photo album to share with your grandkids some day?? (lol)

Your boyfriend took a dump and (supposedly) showed you a picture of it. Yawn.

The only funny part of this thread was:

"...Michael Powell (Chairman of the FCC) (not verified) -- 12.02.2004
The rule is no pictures of REAL poop. Real pictures of FAKE poop are okay. And pictures of pictures of real poop are okay (see, the dog doo calendar on the PoopReport holiday gift guide page). Although, that might be okay because it's a picture of a picture of dog poop. I'm not sure if a picture of a picture of real human poop is okay or not. Real pictures of real poop is indecent. But fake poop (or illustrated poop) is different because it's funny..."

_______
"You polished up my low-flow, and I dirtied up your bowl!"

Michel Powel. Could you re-itterate what you are trying to say.

I didn't think this was a half bad story.

Granted, it is a bit short, but I still enjoyed it. I could alomst picture that green poo sitting there. As for the TP ball, some people throw the TP away from the poo, instead of on top of it.
_______
Watch out for the deadly F4, though he's been gone since '53, he will be back.

i am beaming with pride here that sounds like a true holiday dump. Proud o ya there fella.

What is with all this puritanical crap from America!? Its okay to show online FAKE or rendered poop, but no pics of the real thing? What kind of crap is this? What difference does it make? Fake or real. ITS POOP! The States has got to get out of this backward puritanical culture and join up with the rest of humanity on planet earth! It seems that there is this B I G time warp from America and planet earth and the rest of the 6 200 000 000 human inhabitants!

If you would take the time to peruse this website and forums, you'd see that we are hit with shit fetish freaks and people obsessed with poop on a practical daily basis. To even consider publishing pictures of poop, real poop, on poopreport.com would encourage people who aren't concerned with contributing anything to this website but just that - pictures of poop.

This is a site dedicated to humor that is intellectually-based. We also hope to help people afraid to talk about certain things with their doctor, certain health issues that might include how badly one's butt stinks or why one's underwear looks as if someone has been sitting on a Hershey's Mini every day. And all the while we try to do this, we must sift through literally thousands of comments from non-registered knuckleheads like yourself that are either poorly-written, mean-spirited, or fetish-oriented to find ones that are honest and well-intended, written by people who just want to either share in the fun or get help.

Therefore, this is not a puritanical censoring, but one intended to keep the focus where it should be - on poop humor and medical knowledge.

I hope this calms you down. Since you might want to give your legs a break after jumping to all the above-mentioned conclusions, I suggest you go have a margarita and chillax. Look at some poop while you sip if it sooths you. Real poop. Not the fake poop. Whatever takes your mind off all the witch burning and censorship happening here at poop nazi central.

Peace out, oh judgemental and fecally unbridled one.

_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com