Turd Polisher Pro

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PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ pointsf 5000+ pointsg 4000+ pointsh 3000+ pointsi 2000+ pointsj 1000+ pointsk 500+ pointsl 100+ pointsm 1+ points - Newb
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Just when we think we've seen it all, someone comes along, and with tongue in cheek, puts forth a product that can only let the web viewer sit back and say, "Huh."

The Turd Polisher leaves us wondering if we can truly believe our eyes and ears. Is it possible to render beautiful music from crap? Can you really make something out of this shit? Is the the Jonas Brothers' secret?

I'm not really sure, but I sure as heck love the website. Check it out for yourself. This product is right up our alley. We all know what alley that is.

You can contact The Sound Guy here for further information.

7 Comments on "Turd Polisher Pro"

pnuttycorn's picture
k 500+ points
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Whew! I was thinking how the hell, WHY the hell? It's an awsome name for that thing there.

Bilgepump's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points
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Mythbusters did a show on polishing turds. Jaimie's lion shit (if I remember rightly) came out quite nicely. Turd polishing


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"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

sittingpretty's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points
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One needs a turd to polish. Can't polish soft crap piles.
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...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

Deja Poo's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points
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Wait. Is it shit or shinola? Or is it shinola for shit???

It's bad enough that we have to wipe our asses and wash our hands. Now they want us to polish our poop as well??? Will these silly crap-related fads ever end???
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Yo quiero Taco Bell.

Yo quiero Taco Bell.

Blind Mullet's picture
k 500+ points
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I remember the line from the classic movie "Christine", where the junkyard owner was talking to one of his buddies about young Arnold Cunningham rebuilding the Plymouth Fury:
The old guy says something like "The boy does have good hands..."
The junk yard owner nods solemnly, and says something like "Good hands. Bad taste in cars. Y'know, ya can't polish a turd".

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The white zone is for loading and unloading only- FZ.

The white zone is for loading and unloading only- FZ.

flushette's picture
l 100+ points
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Wait, that really does explain the Jonas Brothers!!


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Remember, even hot chicks poop and fart.

When you've got nowhere to go, and you feel it start to flow, diarrhea... diarrhea.

Anonymous Coward's picture
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Poop is great!!!!