Zizek you naughty girl. That's an instance of turd terrorism if ever I heard one.

Even my own Shamefullness never stops me from being conshiterate of the other facility users in my office. Of course, I don't fill myself with so much fiber that I can't flush successfully either.

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What do you mean you didn't see it? It was right next to the toilet!

If we where playing softball,that would have been a perfect shit and run play.In The Court Of Pooplic Opinion,I have to to find you guilty of second degree Turd Terrorism.

First:

Their are differences between male Shameful Shitters and female Shameful Shitters. When it comes to public restrooms, 9 times out of 10 if a man is entering a stall when a urinal is free, he is entering the stall to drop a bomb. If someone else is in the bathroom that person knows what he is entering the stall for, so that's where the shamefulness is applied.
Their are only stalls in a women's restroom, so other than the risk of smell and noise nobody knows if you are entering the stall to piss or shit.

Most public bathroom have an unpleasant odor anyway so who cares if you smell.

I feel the idea of the female Shameful Shitter is more strong in the area of "women are too dainty to ever shit".

Second:

Apparently you must be a rather large, homely woman that is rather masculine because you seem to resent girly girls.

Third:

I didn't understand the phrase:

"Outside of my home and close friends and family, I am a Shameful Shitter. I was doing well with this until I switched jobs and took one look at my female co-workers. I would not be sharing any fun poop stories with these chicks."

This makes no sense to me.

doniker, Are you on the manrag? You usually are nicer than this.Since rehab anyway.
Producing waste since 1967

Let's examine the office relations at work, here:

I wonder if someone downstairs went around saying "Alright, who plugged up the toilet?". And I wonder if downstairs people ever wander upstairs to the better flushing-toilets.

And I wonder, too, why some men think that just because one isn't a "girly-girl", then one must be "large, homely, and masculine" by default. This simply isn't true.

I agree GGG. I don't consider myself a girly girl even though I do look somewhat like Stone Cold Steve Austin...if he were blonde, shorter, and looked nothing like myself.

P.S. I also agree with Simone. Take a Midol and don't be such a grinch doniker.

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What do you mean you didn't see it? It was right next to the toilet!

Hey I dig large, homely, non-girly girls.

I have probably dated more of that type than the girly girls.

I'm not saying that all non girly girls are large, homely and masculine by default, it's just that between her monster logs, resentment of girly girls and her actions in the story like "bursting through the door" Zizek sounds like a big tough gal.

Zizek - you seem to have copped unfair stick on this one! I for one enjoyed your story.

First, I don't go with the turd terrorism bit. If the toilet isn't good enough to get rid of legitimately deposited crap - tough! Whatever your diet!

Second, I once had a girl friend who could share her poop stories and goings with me, and her close friend. But no-one else. Like you, if she went into the toilet and someone else was in, she'd come out again. She just didn't want anyone else to know - by noise or smell - that she was having a shit. I remember sometimes when we went out for a drink or meal being on toilet watch for her to see who went in and went out, so she could go when no-one was in.

Third, the girly thing is a real perception. Pretty, femine young ladies just don't fart or do big smelly shits, do they? But of course they do!! But a lot just wouldn't want anyone to know, and would clench their cheeks and walk back out again just like you did!

Finally, sorry to disagree with you as a respected luminary on this site, Doniker, but your second comment is irrelevant and out of order.

Why not just sit on the crapper on your floor and wait the other person out? No matter what their business is, they've already started and should finish soon. Next time, just sit your butt on the toilet and way for the previous patron to vacate.

And if the other person doesn't get the hint, try farting. If that doesn't work, try mumbling to yourself or humming a tune, especially a show tune from a musical. Or you could try praying out loud (make sure there are lots of audible "beseech thee" and "forgiveness" and "guidance and wisdom" included; make sure to strain through the "amen"). And if that doesn't work, you can always cackle like a hyena while sitting there with your pantyhose around your ankles. That will drive anybody out of the crapper. Well, it's always worked for me anyway.
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Deja Poo - Because this shit's so strange, it couldn't ever have happened before.

Public toilets that feature only 2 stalls should be outlawed in this country. Without the buffer commode you are force to do battle with an opponent merely inches away. Mixing the public and private domain in such close quarters can really take the fun out of a monster poop. If the bathroom is small, just put one commode in and a lock on the door. Where I work, they changed the configuration of the bathroom to 3 stalls (very nice) to 2 but one stall is very large to accommodate handicapped access. I understand why they did it but since then, nobody uses it. The shameful among us simply found restrooms on other floors for their daily download.

Some people really torture themselves with holding their crap and optimizing their toilet situation. It's just not worth it.

What you experienced is what I commonly call "sphincter lock" due to your being a "private pooper."

I understand completely.

I'm semi-girly but I have a co-worker and fart buddy at work. We go outside to the far side of the parking lot to presumably have a private conversation when in actuality -- we're farting. Then we rate each others farts. She's VERY girly. Thus far I've won Fart Fest with my "cherry-bombs." Cherries make your farts a bio-hazard. Heh. She's the only one I can fart in front of at work and swap stories with.

I hope you find a fart buddy.

If the turd is too big for the toilet, and you try to flush it, to no avail, you are not a turd terrorist.

If you pulled it out, and flung it at the wall, you would be.
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SamDamnit!
The Emir of Crapistan

WOW Zizek! This is what IM talkin about here. A woman after my own heart. It is a shame that you are shameful though but its understandable. I just love a woman that enjoys a good crap as much as I do. I only hope one day to meet my soulmate and that she is a Thunderous Crapper like myself. Zizek be LOUD and PROUD!
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The Thunderous Crapper 63 Enjoying home toilet advantage since 2004!

Just to clarify: when I say girly-girl, I mean intellectually. I don't have the same interests as your typical chick (clothes, shopping, jewelry, torturing their boyfriend). I'm tall, but I wouldn't say big and burly. I take Taekwon-do, but I'm not masculine.

Also, I don't resent girly-girls, I just don't relate to them well. The thing I hate the most is the whole men bashing thing that most chicks love to do. Especially when it involves the person they claim to love. I have chick friends, but we usually don't have much in common (even though I love to knit and crochet, most of them don't - go figure).

I'm working on not being so shameful, but there are only about a dozen chicks in my office and I work closely with most of them. If they were strangers, I'd let fly without trouble, but I just can't do it when I know I'll probably be making small talk with that person fifteen minutes later.

Thanks everyone for your nice, hilarious comments! I feel very welcome after my first post.

Doniker, wow! You must not know girly girls very well (and self-admit to not have dated many). They are the reason there are Shameful Shitters! They giggly gossip, scoff at, regard with disgust and not-so-subtly deride any other female dropping a major stink bomb. The more there are in a group, the more caustic it becomes. They are pointing out others' perceived faults in order to deflect attention from their own and to make themselves appear superior. They are the reason that many people, (mostly ones with penises), believe that hot chicks don't shit. I am not a bull-dyke, waaaaaaay far from it-- like I always say: I'm not "girly" at all, but very, very feminine.
Fart buddies between cute and otherwise shamefuls-around-strangers chicks is an intense, intimate bond. Guys who love to publicly rip (god love'em) to an audience just wouldn't understand....

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'Hey that sounds pretty nasty, how about a courtesy flush over there?' (AP1)

People, people. Please just IGNORE doniker, hes just makin an ass out of himself. Hes doine that here before, and I guess hes up to it again...

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(insert ziggy boogy doog here)

Oh and I forgot, Zizek, great story!

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(insert ziggy boogy doog here)

hey Zizek, being a knitter and crocheter doesn't make for a girly girl.

I'm an absolute yarn addict, but about 90% of my friends are male ...

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And it burns, burns, burns -
The ring of fire.

So Zizek, your definition of a girly girl is actually a feminist who abhors everything commonly associated with the female gender. Or am I reading that wrong?

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What do you mean you didn't see it? It was right next to the toilet!

ahh, thanx zizek, and all the posters for giving me a few good morning laughs. now, as far as the charge or turd terrorism, i would have to say guilty. think of the poor janitor that has to deal with your nasty little mess all because you were too ashamed to be heard plunging. tisk tisk. did u ever consider the fact that a good chunk or the toilet cloggage that happens in america is due to too much paper being flushed? there, automatic excuse. yes it was a great story but you will get no pity from me, as i have frequently been seen walkin through offices, warehouses and dept stores alike, plunger in hand, head held high. any co-worker that looked my way i just gave them 'the nod'. nature cannot be controlled but consideration must be considered. you owe that janitor at least a 12 pack.

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oh man, i feel soo much better. i think i lost a few pounds... dont even think about going in there for at least 20-30 minutes. dont worry, i left the fan on.

I think Doniker is a girly girl.
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SamDamnit!
The Emir of Crapistan

*FF returns from a fun vacation, starts to catch up on PR, finds above comment from Sam*

OMG ROFL !!!!!!111 the mental image of Doniker as a girly-girl is funnier than anything I saw at the mystery dinner theater my friend took me to!

Does this include Doniker pooping out little puffs of cotton candy? *snerk*

*FF wanders off to do post-vacation laundry, laughing until she farts* Oooooppppsssss ....

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And it burns, burns, burns -
The ring of fire.

I think a more appropriate thing to say as you fled the rest room would have been, "Abandon Shit! Abandon Shit!"