Marblehead And The Deep Sink

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l 100+ pointsm 1+ points - Newb
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I've been crapping in the corner crapper for a few years now. The lock's been fixed, and Knothead has quit bursting in on people unannounced.

Our company has taken hits like everyone else’s in this economy, so we've shrunk quite a bit, employee-wise. We used to pay someone to come in early and clean the restrooms and offices, but we lost that luxury when that someone was unfortunately laid off. The crew and I still needed a clean place to crap, however, so we were assigned cleaning duties on a rotating basis. Of course, the cleaning duties were not assigned to the office folks; they couldn't possibly be expected to clean their own short and curlies in their own crapper. We had to do it for them.

I'm still a Sailor at heart. Cleaning a shitter is no big deal to me, so I gathered my cleaning supplies together and went to work when it was my turn. Truth be told, the shitter was cleaner when we rotated the duties than when one person was paid extra to do it.

The deep sink is located right outside my favorite crapper, which is near the coffee pot. A couple of the office folks have a bad habit of putting their cups and dishes in that sink and waiting for the Dish fairy to take care of them. This sink is the same one into which I pour the wash bucket water after I've scrubbed toilets. Being a reasonably considerate person, I explained to an office dude, one who often left his dishes in the sink, that the odds that someone, after scrubbing the toilets, would remove the dishes from that sink before pouring the shit shine juice down the drain were slim to none. Maybe, I remarked, he ought to store his dishes and cutlery elsewhere, and maybe, I suggested, he should pass the information on to his office mates. As I relayed this to him, he looked at me in the same manner as a cow does at a passing train. The concept of cleaning a shitter was out of his scope of comprehension, along with how the cleaning fluids would be disposed of afterwards; obviously, he’d never had to clean a thing in his life.

Well, too bad. I poured the shit shine juice in the deep sink after I cleaned toilets with a clear conscience. I tried to warn him. I even explained the issue to Knothead; but I did so to no avail.

Four months later, we suffered another round of layoffs, which left even fewer people to clean the shitters. During this time, the office folks were assigned their own crappers to clean. I saw the dude I’d first warned come out to prepare some cleaning supplies. He was lost – didn’t seem to have a clue what to do. The swab he’d grabbed in one hand was nasty and rotten, and the flimsy plastic bucket he held in the other was half full of pure pine oil. I just couldn't let him go off like that, so I stopped the well-dressed Marblehead and demonstrated how to prepare a mop bucket with the right cleanser. I then demonstrated how to clean a shitter by cleaning my favorite one as he watched. After I was done, I demonstrated what to do with the waste water by dumping it in the deep sink.

He put two and two together. The look on Marblehead’s face was worth the price of admission; it finally hit him why I had been so emphatic that the officer workers not leave their cups in the deep sink. He turned pale, surely with the realization that not only had he been drinking out of a shit water-bathed cup for four months, but also that there was nothing he could do about it. He'd been amply warned.

Mysteriously, cups aren't left in the sink anymore.

16 Comments on "Marblehead And The Deep Sink"

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points
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I thoroughly enjoyed posting this disgusting story. How many times during your life have you warned someone to do or not do something for a good reason, only to be blown off and ignored? Of those times, how many of them involved trying to explain something to a know-it-all who couldn't be bothered with what you were saying?


_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

C Everett Poop's picture
j 1000+ points
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Excellent story. This validates my guiding principle of trying to never piss off a sailor in my 21 years of being an officer. They will always find a way to even the score.

Thunderbox's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points
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Great stuff, plop. I think you can safely say, "My work here is done!"

I don`t own a suit, or even a tie, and yet I have to, occasionally, meet with these kind of folk for work.

Not many, but a few seem to consider that their fancy suit gives them a few more IQ points. And the more expensively dressed they are, the higher that imaginary IQ soars!

The voice of sanity

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points
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Wise decision CEP ... An Air Force Major, who was actually an ass kissing weasel, once pissed me off so badly that I crept into his office in the dead of night and gave the underside of his desk a thorough rubdown with limberger cheese. No amount of floor mopping would rid the room of smell and he was too stupid to look anywhere other than "inside" the drawers. It took weeks for the smell to finally dissipate.

He is the one I mentioned in another thread that washed a staff car to impress a general officer who was visiting from Omaha. It was the dead of winter and all the doors of the car froze shut. When the general arrived he had to be picked up and stuffed through the vehicle's window. I don't think he was highly impressed.

Oh ... I almost forgot plop cop, great story.


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

Dr Scully's picture
l 100+ points
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Awesome story! Just out of curiosity, where there coffee cups still in the sink when you were dumping out the water after showing him how to clean? If so, was his particular coffee cup in there?
You should really consider bringing a pinhole camera with you to work. Watching his face while you dumped a bucket of piss on his "Life's a Beach" coffee cup would certainly have been a priceless site.

Anonymous Coward's picture
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Why didn't you pour it out in the toilets? This is just gross, why pour dirty piss water into a sink? O_o

plop cop's picture
l 100+ pointsm 1+ points - Newb
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AC, you obviously never cleaned a shitter in your life. You don't pour nasty washwater in a crapper. What's the point of cleaning a crapper if your just going to funk it up? You are also unaware and not in tune to the tools of cleaning and procedures therein. A deepsink is specifically made and constructed to provide washwater at a temperature and rate sufficient to fill a mop bucket. The sink is shaped and drain in said sink is designed to properly dispose of wastewater. Just as a toilet is designed to shit in, a deep sink is designed to get washwater from and dispose of into when through. Folks who perform actual labor understand these terms and limitations..... I'll take my lame point now thank you.

_______
Now that's what a men's room is supposed to smell like!

Now that's what a men's room is supposed to smell like!

Bilgepump's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points
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Not so fast, copper, I greated that, just because you managed to stay calm in explaining something I take for granted, therefore, something I consider common knowledge. When I try to explain that kind of thing to the ignorant, I get pretty fucking mean...way to go, buddy.

_______
"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points
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Well plop cop ... I had to give you a great also, the comment deserved it plus Bilge threatened me.

I must admit that when I lived in the barracks at Yokota AB, Japan, I quite often placed a 1,800 ml bottle of sake in the deep sink and ran warm water over it until it was at the correct temperature for drinking, then I would proceed to get "shit faced".


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

C Everett Poop's picture
j 1000+ points
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Back in the day, some officers would sit on their sorry asses and bark at some enlisted guy to bring them a cup of coffee. They always got their coffee but I have talked to enough senior and retired enlisted to know that they also got cups with the rim dicked, nut hair in the cup and piss in the coffee. Don't fuck with guys like that.

Thunderbox's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points
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I remember seeing similar stuff, CEP, when I first started out in construction.

As a trainee engineer/surveyor I had to go around our construction sites to measure up the work that had been done by our company employees for bonus and the self employed tradesmen.

Generally in our site agents hut there were several mugs used for guys` coffee or tea. But I was always warned not to take a certain mug, as it was for the sole purpose of the council`s Clerk of Works (the client`s/local council`s supervisor)

It was the "knob cup". The mug that the guy who hated that man the most in the past week had taken and rubbed his unwashed member`s head around the rim a few times for badness and had replaced it where it should have been.

The voice of sanity

ChiliKahKah's picture
j 1000+ points
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Guess Marblehead will learn to listen from now on!

plop cop's picture
l 100+ pointsm 1+ points - Newb
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CEP, you brought back a flashback. Ever play "Odd or Even?" That's when you reach in your skivvies and pull a few curlies, then put them in the cup and ask "Odd or Even". "Rimming" the cup (or "dirty dicking" if in the Western Pacific) was optional. Can't say I ever did that but I've witnessed it and never once felt the urge to forwarn the recipient. The facial expression of a flame spraying lunatic putz coughing/hacking back a short-n-curly is not an experience to pass up.

_______
Now that's what a men's room is supposed to smell like!

Now that's what a men's room is supposed to smell like!

kentuckykin's picture
m 1+ points - Newb
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It is amazing how many people think there is a toilet fairy that waves a wand and ta-da, clean and sparkling!!

Dumps Like a Truck's picture
m 1+ points - Newb
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Great story. Comeuppance is so, so sweet!

I too worked at a place like this. Where the 'staff' (aka lower caste) had a rotating schedule of cleaning. While the 'professionals' (upper caste), had an ongoing schedule of leaving dirty dishes in sinks, leaving exploded seafood lunches in the microwave, and rotten leftovers in the fridge.

I think, if you're not going to employ professional cleaning staff to clean an office, then EVERYONE should pitch in. Including the C-freaking-EO. (Granted, most of these 'professionals' employed housekeepers at their homes too. I think that's why they always left such a mess. They thought the cleaning fairy just made it disappear.

I was always very passive aggressive when it was my week to clean. I'd do the shittiest job possible. All the while glaring at any of the professionals who dared to step into the room and try to leave a cup in the sink.

Some people disagreed with my technique. Since I was leaving a mess for the next staff person to clean. But, if they'd employed my technique too, soon the place would get so grimy, that maybe the doofuses in charge would get a clue.

OP, I salute you. You are clearly of better moral character, and made of tougher stuff than I!

The Ultimate Toilet of DOOM!'s picture
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That whole "shitty water down the sink" theory doesn't convince me, either.

Yeah, the toilet has just been cleaned and you wouldn't crap in it again, but the cleaning fluids will have dissolved whatever nastiness was picked up by the mop etc. so it would not be much different than flushing muddy water with some pee. More flowing liquid than sticky solid stuff, if you catch my drift.

Plus, if you simply aim the bucket down the hole without chocolate-shotgunning everything, a toilet will usually have much better flushing capacity than any sink, unless we're talking about a particularly capable sink and an easily cloggable and narrow toilet.

Still...given the choice I'd rather not flush anything shitty into something that is at hand-washing and water-drinking height.

Just my 2c from having cleaned a fair amount of shitters in my time :-p