Poop For Peace Day: April 17, 2009

0
0


(New to Poop For Peace? Get lots more info here.)

Today, humanity stands on the brink. Iraq, Afghanistan, Darfur, Congo, Somalia, Mexico... across the world, violence and anger overwhelm any progress towards peace and liberty. We are a divided species, basing our hatreds on even the most arbitrary classifications, unable to move past our quarrels to embrace common humanity. Since difference is all we can see, suffering is all we can expect.

That's why you should go poop right now.

Because today, April 17, is Poop For Peace Day.

Poop For Peace Day is not about protest or partisanship or politics. Poop For Peace Day is about acknowledging the fundamental basis of shared humanity: black or white, liberal or conservative, Christian or Muslim or Jew, we are all united in struggle against the tyranny of the bowel.

So print out your Poop For Peace guide sheet, drink some coffee to get things moving, and head off to the bathroom. As you grunt out your morning constitutional, think of the billions of people all across the world who are undergoing the exact same struggle. Think of the children of Iraq and the children of America. Think of Obama and Sarkozy and Kim Jong Il and bin Laden, and think about the fact the twelve hours following Taco Bell are going to unfold for each of them in the exact same way. Think about how our differences are irrelevant -- we're all human beings. Our poop proves it.

Empathy through excrement. Brotherhood through bowel movement. Utopia through undulating butt pythons. Today, April 17, 2009, war is over -- if you grunt it.

So go to the bathroom and drop a grumper for your fellow man. And then come back here and proclaim it to the world.




poop for peace

Get ready for 2010's push.


For six years we have pooped for peace, and for six years the evildoers among us have feigned constipation and thus prolonged humanity’s suffering. Which means the brown-splattered dove still sadly circles, an olive branch in its beak and a bit of toilet paper trailing from its foot, waiting for a nice, solid log on which to alight and end our strife.

So we'll be pooping for peace again in 2010. Submit your email address to get news and updates as this year's Poop For Peace Day approaches, as well as to get an email reminder on the day of the glorious event.







subscribe to PoopNews (our witty monthly newsletter) as well

just Poop For Peace, thanks












Put up posters!

Post a banner on your site!

Send out a press release!





Join the Facebook group to spread the word!




Number Two Guide

The Diary of Li'l Crohnsie

Zymetrical

Stinks N Things

Frankenstein's Funhouse


Dave Barry

Kottke

Graceful Flavor

Mediation Channel

Brainless World

For Wrongs Make A Wrong

RCK2.net

Professional Jackass

Coarse Grind

Demented Composer

Bits on the side

Own The Day

The Original Glamazon

Jumbodump

Watch the Poop For Peace music video!



Post a banner on your site
to get a link here!




Free sample of The Final Wipe to anyone Pooping For Peace! Email Anthony.




Free can of fake poop with every Poop For Peace Day order from Stinks N Things!


58 Comments on "Poop For Peace Day: April 17, 2009"

Dave's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content Moderatora 10000+ points - Super Pooperb 9000+ pointsc 8000+ pointsd 7000+ pointse 6000+ pointsf 5000+ pointsg 4000+ pointsh 3000+ pointsi 2000+ pointsj 1000+ pointsk 500+ pointsl 100+ pointsm 1+ points - Newb
0
0

I'm currently in Singapore working for the World Toilet Organization, formulating strategies for bringing sanitation to the 2.5 billion people in the world who lack it. Last night the Singapore-born founder of the WTO took my wife and I out for a proper Chinese feast: seven courses of double-boiled chicken soup, prawn salad with melon, flayed fried fish, roast chicken with ginger mash, chili bok choy, coarse rice with egg, dessert, and endless jasmine tea, and then a trip to the hawker center for a bowl of peanut soup with glutenous rice balls and something called "bo bo cha cha", which was a cold coconut milk soup with yams and jellied thingies.

Needless to say, I've got a full United Nations of food churning in my melting pot, now a full 20 hours after we ate. I'm not sure when exactly I'll be pooping for peace, but I do know that I will probably be able to account for the contribution of all 4.6 million Singaporeans on my own.

VeganRM's picture
0
0

I'm vegan. I poop many times a day. Today each one of them will be for world peace. My girlfriend was so excited about this (also vegan), that she went to poop now. She got back before I finished this. She pooped for equal rights.

El Scumbag's picture
k 500+ points
0
0

I pooped for peace half an hour ago. My thoughts went to those who at that moment were not able to do as I was doing: enjoying a comfortable and extensive evacuation of yesterday's lunch with my buttocks resting on my own toilet seat, soft paper to wipe with, the ability to flush my leavings away and clean my hands with fresh water before indulging in a fine breakfast. We take these things for granted so easily that it is almost mundane, but at any given moment, poop is flowing from the anuses of human beings all over the world, of every class, creed, religion, race, sexual orientation, size, shape and colour and it unites us all. We are the lucky ones, being able to do it in comfort.

Perhaps also we shall remember pooping for peace in times of conflict with another human or human collective. When we feel the need to strike in hate, to punish, to condemn, to fight or simply to express our anger, allowing a brief moment to imagine one's foeman or foemen squatting to drop a stool could be all the respite necessary to invoke mercy and kinship in our souls. It is frequently suggested to those that tremble before authority that imagining the subject of their fears sitting on the toilet quells a great deal of unnecessary anxiety, and perhaps there is a deeper wider purpose to this technique. Pooping for peace is more than just an amusing method of collective defecation, it is a reminder that we are all stool siblings under the skin and whatever our feelings towards another, however fundamentally different or superior we believe ourselves to be, we have something in common and if we allow it to, our turds can be the seeds of peace.

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points
0
0

Unknowingly, I pooped for peace about one am this morning. Since I was not quite awake, I was not able to reflect on the importance of the day.

I am however fortunate that the unknown part was just the time and date.

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points
0
0

I haven't pooped for peace yet but I can feel yesterday's evening meal dropping ever lower in my bowels in anticipation of going for a swim in the commode. I am thankful that I am at home and the pooping will be a pleasantly comfortable experience.

My prayers go out to the Somalian refugees in the huge resettlement camp at Dadaab in Northern Kenya. The poops of these poor people will be minimal as they have insufficient food and the environment probably provides minimal privacy for their performance of the deed. Over a quarter of a million people jammed into a small area. I live in a mobile home, drive a compact car and have minimal savings but would be considered wealthy beyond belief by most of these people. We in the more advanced countries of the world are so blessed.


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

log_blogger's picture
m 1+ points - Newb
0
0

My poop for peace was very peaceful. Corn on the cob, ribeye, black beans, chips and salsa, spicy chicken burrito, chicken tacos, bran muffin and a brownie. It made me proud to be human.


_______
www.mydailypoop.com

www.mydailypoop.com

Deja Poo's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points
0
0

This is a truly momentous day. It's not even 10:30 am and I've already hit the crapper three times, and all of this without suffering from the flaming butt squirts.

Peace is a great and noble thing, but as I was setting on the crapper all three times, I found myself drawn to the prospect of over-population. I know that many cultures believe in the sanctity of life and that we should be prolific in our pro-creation. But, gosh darn it, I can not help but feel that we as a species, are over-running and rapidly depleting our habitats. In the end, the reason for conflicts between societies is resources. Considering that the resources in contention are relatively fixed, or the ability to renew these resources is limited, I can't see less conflict as the world's human population expands. There's only so much arable land, there's only so much fresh water, there's only so much oil and other mineral deposits. We may be able to use these resources more efficiently and recover and reuse some of these, but there has got to be an upper limit to this capacity.

In any case, if more people would float more of the foulness that just escaped my ass before they approach their mate, there might be less irresponsible copulation. Don't get me wrong. I'm all doing the dance of the wild monkeys when the urge strikes. I just think that we need to make sure that the dance itself doesn't result in more little wild monkeys.
_______
My special needs student crapped in your honor roll student's backpack.

Yo quiero Taco Bell.

Anonymous Coward's picture
0
0

Thank you for supporting this great cause...poop on fellow poopers

The Thunderous Crapper 63's picture
k 500+ points
0
0

Ahhhhhhh the pause that refreshes....I just took a Weight Watchers dump...yes there is a new classification of poo...It is high in fiber but it also CAN produce some extremely dirty farts so please proceed with extreme caution. That might not JUST be a fart. So my WW dump was very inspiring all in the movement for PEACE. To everyone a good day AND a good dump!
_______
AHHHHHEMMMMMMMMMM JUST CLEARING MY THROAT!! ;)

AHHHHHEMMMMMMMMMM JUST CLEARING MY THROAT!! ;)

dannyboy's picture
0
0

I did it.., sort of!

I sat down, as usual right around 10 am, announced to the world (OK, apartment including wife, daughter, niece) my intentions of pooping for peace, went in to the bathroom, sat down, and then forgot about everything, had a pleasant and very peaceful normal poop, flushed, came back to work, and then realized I forgot the poop for peace business! Will try again later, but it WAS a peaceful poop...

Paddy Cakes's picture
0
0

My Piece is your PEACE...Done !

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points
0
0

Deja Poo......You are so right. All the problems of the world, famine, pollution, shortage of resources, etc. can be directly or indirectly blamed on overpopulation. Political and religious leaders don't take a stand on this issue because it would make them unpopular.


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

bodski's picture
0
0

Today, at the break of day, I marched with vigor to my pocelain chalice and pooped for peace. Upon completion, I inspected my peace offering and realized that I had also pooped for diversity, which somehow seems philosophically consistent. Lettuce, corn, asparagus, cheese, italian parsley, hamburger, greek olives, hard-boiled eggs, flax seed and oat bran; a variety of colors and food groups from separate meals shared in multiple settings, all adding their unique giftings, yet somehow demonstrating in unity. The total was definitely greater than the sum of the parts. Peace, everyone!

Deja Poo's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points
0
0

Congrats to you, Paddy. Welcome to PR.
_______
My special need's student crapped in your honor roll student's backpack.

Yo quiero Taco Bell.

Deja Poo's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points
0
0

Just out of curiousity, Danny. How did you announce your intentions? Did you go to each of them and say "I'm using the bathroom in 5 minutes, so if you need to brush your teeth, you might want to do so now." or did you just holler out "Sweet Mother of Gawd, somebody get the plunger. This is going to be huge!" or did you just let out The Fart Heard 'Round The Apartment?
_______
My special needs student crapped in your honor roll student's backpack.

Yo quiero Taco Bell.

pooping Jesus lover's picture
0
0

This is a great day!! Jesus pooped and I'm pooping too. Enjoying your website!

todlosicasso's picture
0
0

I let a few go
just so you know
Set the poop free
to bring peace to you and me

Anonymous Runny Coward's picture
0
0

I have the runs, does that count? If it does then I have lots of pieces (ha ha)for World Poop Day. uh uh.....gotta run... got more pieces

muddywaters's picture
m 1+ points - Newb
0
0

Peace! However, what came out of me this morning was more like the fires of war.

muddywaters

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points
0
0

I am loading up on bourbon, pork bulgogi, with extra chilies, and a large side of homemade kimchi, I plan on pooping for peace again tomorrow.


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

Anonymous Coward's picture
0
0

I just pooped in San francisco

Deja Poo's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points
0
0

PR needs another pooet, todlosicasso. Welcome.

BTW, I'm not familiar with "todlosicasso". What does it mean? Is it Italian for "shitbird"?
_______
My special needs student crapped in your honor roll student's backpack.

Yo quiero Taco Bell.

Crapola's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorl 100+ points
0
0

I pooped for peace at the break of day, 6 AM New York time. Hoping all our poops will bring a new day... of peace in the world and world unity.


_______
Piece Out!
Crapola

Piece Out!
Crapola

harleydude's picture
0
0

I pooped for peace today. But it was green because I ate 1/2 bag of black licorice. Green poop is awesome, but it did freak me out a little.

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points
0
0

Harleydude.....You sir are a disgrace to other Harley riders. Throw away the licorice and make that poop green by drinking lots of black beer. Although I suppose that if you must eat candy, licorice is the manly choice. Don't get caught with anything sissy, like a cream puff.
But I commend you for pooping for peace.


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

Logjam's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points
0
0

I pooped today, as I do everyday, for pleasure and comfort. But given that in this case these more selfish interests don't seem at odds with the cause of peace, I will toss my hat in the communal shit pot of peace lovers everywhere. Let freedom plop.

Logjam

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points
0
0

Let freedom ring.
Let your assholes sing.
Let the whole world know it's the day,
Of peaceful splattering.

Let the weak be strong, may your turds be long.
Flush them all away, there's no guilt today.
It's peaceful pooping day.

Sorry Martina,

Bilgepump's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points
0
0

High noon...wanted to leave a shit that had some sort of meaning...sadly, I'm bleeding again, necessitating another fucking trip to the doctor.

_______

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

shitake boy's picture
l 100+ points
0
0


I pooped for peace earlier this afternoon in the Family Restroom at the local Target. And what a great poop it was. I actually am going to make another contribution to Poop for Peace in the next five minutes, for there is a rumble in my bowels.

_______
In search of the ever evasive BM

In search of the ever evasive BM

Logjam's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points
0
0

Let the word go out
that shit is no slouch
Let the war-lords know it’s the day
to cease their blood-letting bout.

Yes, this is the day
when shit shows us the way
So all poopers please shout
Peace and poop: together we lay.

Logjam

MSG's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points
0
0

I pooped for peace early this morning, as usual, thinking that, as always, a few million other human beings were feeling their turds descend at exactly the same moment as mine. I doubt many of them were thinking of it the same way I did; but pretty much every day, I am aware that, on average (if people poop once a day on average), with 6,000,000,000 people, there are 250,000,000 pooping every hour, 4,000,000 and change every minute, around the clock, 24 / 7 / 365. What kinship we have in this very physical realm with all other human beings!

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points
0
0

MSG...Add in the other animals and earth is one gigantic poopfest!!

br>_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

cornleg's picture
l 100+ points
0
0

I produced a bowl of Deuce soup for peace today...It's dark hearty broth was chock full of onion skins, tomato bits and of course corn. It was preceded by a town crier that announced its arrival with YOT! SQQQQQQQAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNnnnnnnttttsssssss....
_______
Don't move the truck I'm still on the bucket!

Don't move the truck I'm still on the bucket!

Postman's picture
k 500+ points
0
0

This turned out to be a rare poopless day for me, so I was unable to do my part. Sorry.

If a global nuclear war breaks out, I'll take full responsibility.

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points
0
0

Postman, I'm not sure what time zone you reside in, but you have at least 3 hours left.
Make yourself a snack, some coffee, grab some magazines and get on that pot. You can do it. Remember the postal creed.

Browntown Fog's picture
m 1+ points - Newb
0
0

3 2's #3 sweaty...itch kept me thoughtful. Peace.

II

DR T's picture
m 1+ points - Newb
0
0

I pooped for peace about 1:30 PM local time. I had almost forgott about today till I had my pants down. Then I remembered! I thought about how fortunate I was to have a place like home to poop in, when so many others were without a "pot to poop in", pun intended!

I did three logs aproxmatly 6in long and 1.5 around, and one about 4in long, to finish up with.

It was a pretty dark brown color with streaks of green through it (from last night's green beans) and would have made a nice picture, suitable for framing!

Cleanup was very easy on the ass, requiring only two wads of paper.

I sat there on the white throne for ten minutes, being greatfull for all I had, before flushing this masterpiece of poop down the drain.

I wish for you all today, a great poop like this one.

T

Deja Poo's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points
0
0

So, Mr. T, when you were setting there on the throne having dropped off the kids, was it then that you were contemplating your good fortune or were you, like me, playing Brickbreaker on your Blackberry?
_______
My special needs student crapped in your honor roll student's backpack.

Yo quiero Taco Bell.

Postman's picture
k 500+ points
0
0

PD, I'll give it a shot, but pooping now is kind of like showing up for a party after everybody else is already wasted.

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points
0
0

I'm a hypocrite, you see.
Mr. daphne said to me.
Here were are, eating well,
But it's dreaded sashimi.

"Yes," I said, "I know it's true."
"My fish in tanks know not a clue."
"That I every one month or two"
"Succumb to raw fish as a food."

I had sashimi and a great poop. I even wondered while meditating about the fact that my feet stuck to the bottom of the bathroom floor - until I saw that the restaurant had 3 aroma sprays available.

Next year I will remember who I am and have a humongous spinach salad.


_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points
0
0

Very nice Daphne. Did you and Mr. Daphne do a drive by on the way home?

RoboCrap13's picture
l 100+ points
0
0

As I approached the Hollywood Bowl, I knew the orchestra was moving into position. I took my seat and waited.

The concert started with a light, relaxed piece in the key of F performed by the lower winds.

The rain started, and the sound added to the performance.

I sat quietly listening to the passage of the various movements: The first one was smooth and calming, and it left me feeling peaceful.

It was quickly followed by a scary one that was biting and explosive.

The final movement started slow and then strained into a great screaming crescendo until it finished with an unexpected note that left the audience breathless.

Paper streamers crossed the room as the crowd cheerfully prepared to leave.

And I was happy as I heard a roar of thunder and watched everything clear out of the bandshell.

_______
You have the right to remain Silent but Deadly....

You have the right to remain Silent but Deadly....

Postman's picture
k 500+ points
0
0

I finally pooped at 7:30 this morning, too late for April 17th in this country, but somewhere in the world, with all the different time zones, it must have still been April 17th somewhere in the world.

Anonymous Coward's picture
0
0

My husband started the day off right and shit his pants for peace. After getting out of the shower, I noticed a clean bag in the bin and asked why he'd taken the garbage out already. He replied that not only is he a peace pooper, he's also a responsible peace pooper!!

La Petomaine's picture
l 100+ points
0
0

I did the blessed deed three times. Sometimes I curse my bowels for tending to constipation, but I bless Phillips Caplets for being there for me. And on this day I am also grateful for Cottonelle Wipes, so my butt doesn't get torn up by dry T.P. alone.


_______
Have a crappy day!
La Petomaine

Have a crappy day!
La Petomaine

the poop one's picture
m 1+ points - Newb
0
0

On poop for peace day, I waited for the feeling... that feeling of the urge to poop. I waited for many hours and finally, 11:30 p.m., I knew it was time. I only had a half hour left to finish, which is plenty of time.... sometimes. I pooped for peace that day, no magazine and no cell phone to distract me. I just enjoyed the moment, thinking about all the people that had pooped for peace that day... It was a beautiful moment. I enjoyed every second of it.

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points
0
0

I am sure the world is a a more closely knit society thanks to the straining and grunting of those who participated, from the heart of my bottom I can only say "thank you my fellow earthlings."


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

Deja Poo's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points
0
0

Hey, watch who you besmirch with that Earthling epithet, Chief. This may be your insane asylum by birth, but it's only a temporary billet for me.
_______
Mork calling Orson. Come in Orson.

Yo quiero Taco Bell.

Jack Schitt's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorl 100+ points
0
0


prarie doggin (3036) -- 04.17.2009
Let freedom ring.
Let your assholes sing.
Let the whole world know it's the day,
Of peaceful splattering.

Let the weak be strong, may your turds be long.
Flush them all away, there's no guilt today.
It's peaceful pooping day.

Sorry Martina,

PD, I don't think any apologies are necessary. If Martina could see what she has inspired I think she would be honored, at least she should be. How about finishing this one and posting it on the parody thread in the forums....I'd love to but I don't posess the talent.
Anonymous Coward's picture
0
0

Hello All,
Just wating for my prep work to kick in fo a colonoscopy. Wish me luck. I'm a bit freaked out by the whole thing.