The longest you've been constipated is

PoopReport of the Year Awardj 1000+ pointsk 500+ pointsl 100+ pointsm 1+ points - Newb

158 Comments on "The longest you've been constipated is"

Poop Shooter's picture
k 500+ points

A couple 2-4 days is normal for me. Unless I get to drinking too much beer of coffee. I have very rarley had a problem taking a dump. I guess I'm lucky. I think my body like to build up a good log before dispersing it.

Also, any who answered 3 weeks - month has to be lyling. Your shit would come out of your mouth by then and you would probably be dead!

Poop Shooter!

Poop Shooter!

turd turdgutson's picture
l 100+ points

One to three weeks. Routinely. And then, when it comes, it's like someone's opened the gates of hell, and the most powerful, vile gas and liqui-shit comes blasting out, usually decorating the inside of the bowl with brownish butt water and oftentimes causing me to feel lightheaded and dizzy and out of breath. This will usually happen over the course of several episodes, lasting one to three days, with lots of gas pressure and bloating the entire time.. Then its back to being bone-dry constipated again, with only the occasional and welcome Lincoln Log to break up the monotony.

"...human shit has more of an almond, or perhaps a macadamia flavor to it. I hope you will all take my advice and really consider tasting your poop some time, as I have. It's really quite an experience." - Ratz

"You will spray oil when you fart. You will have diarrhea. You will be shitting constantly and you will lose control of your bowels." - Mr. Angry on alli

The Shit Volcano's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points

I've gone for ten days straight without shitting. This was during one of my many filming/writing trips during the summer. I was dehydrated for a few days and when the damn shit finally did come out it was thick, hard, and painful. I filled the toilet bowl with blood from my ripped asshole two days in a row!

"That was a very disappointing party. I showed up and everyone left!"- Camille

I found Jesus! He was behind the sofa the whole time!

healthy 1's picture
j 1000+ points

The longest I have been constipated, 19 months, no shit. Every time I went, it was like steel. IBS and mental stress will block a person up in a hurry, not to mention, all those hard turds led to one hell of a case of hemmorhoids.

"Two percent of the population think; three percent of the population think they think, and 95 percent of the population would rather die than think."

Double Flush's picture
k 500+ points

I assume you had a lot of big hard poops rather than not being able to poop at all. You couldn't live 19 months like that because it would start coming back up. At least I hope you were able to push out those big hard turds--something is better than nothing.

Damnit, someone stole my signature!

[Insert witty banter here]

healthy 1's picture
j 1000+ points

Yeah, I would average about four poops a week (laxative assisted). I also had the occasional case of gastroenteritis to blow things out, and I mean blow things out. No fun shitting until my ass was raw, and throwing up at the same time. I'll get into my ordeal with hemmorhoids soon.

"Two percent of the population think; three percent of the population think they think, and 95 percent of the population would rather die than think."

Betty Poop's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

the longest i was constipated was only one time. my mom and i were on our way back from germany and we got laid over for three hours. plus the plane air and the lack of water were contributing factors. when we got to our hotel, i was in horrid pain. but luckily by the next day all was good and right in my bowels. now i poop at least once a day, and keep a bottle of water with me at all times.
drink more liquids!

poop poop eee doop!

Nine Inch Log's picture
k 500+ points

When I had my stroke, I could not poo for over a week. The really scary part was when I would start throwing up everything that I ate and after a
few days I swear I was pooing from my mouth.

Sadly, I didn't ask poonurse.
However, I did go to the doctor.

Number One . . . I order you to take a number two.

Number One . . . I order you to take a number two.

shitwit's picture
k 500+ points

I think the longest I've gone without a dump was 4 days. It's happened twice as far as I know. Once while pregnant, and once while on antibiotics. But it wasn't too bad. I just didn't have the urge to go for a few days. But when I did get the urge again I think I made up for it by shitting several times a day until things were back to normal.

Brown tidings I bring
to you
from my ring

Rock-n-roll! Poopy-poo!

The Big Wiper's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points

Three or four days as a result of surgery. Wrote it up as a story, 'Manual Disimpaction.' Otherwise, happens very seldom.

Pulling My Pants Down For Peace, Plop and Posterity!

Pooped Out in Ottawa's picture

I just had a four day stint. Finally, after taking fibre everyday since Sunday, I went. My @$$ felt lighter and I had to light 2 incense sticks and turn on the fan. The cat left the bathroom once the solid turned to that farty diahrea and then hard again phase.

If you can't poop in like a long time, your colon should be examined, that must really hurt.

I hate meds: the new anti-headache one caused this. Now I am going to take fibre caplets nightly and maybe in the morning too.

shittin on top of the world's picture

At a hockey game.
Myself and some buddies were in the upper levels of the hockey rink during a college game last year, and Harv announces he needs to take a shit.
Harv is proof positive that humanity is devolving. He looks rather like a gorilla, and has manners that would embarrass one.
One of the guys said, "Well don't tell us about it, go to the toilet." (Most people wouldn't require instruction, but with Harv you never know.) Harv didn't go. Some time later he announces again that he really needs to shit. We're all irritated that he's complaining rather than going to a restroom. "Shut up, moron." Silence again for a while.
"Look, I really gotta take a shit," Harv says again. We're all getting pissed. "Why don't you go to the toilet instead of telling us?" Chuck asked. "I don't wanna miss anything."
In all actuality this was the most boring hockey game I'd ever sat through, so I told Harv, "You're not gonna miss anything."
So Harv gets up and lumbers to the back, and out the door. About two minutes later, dumbass Harv comes back. He don't smell so good.
"Hey Harv, what did ya do, crap yourself?" Bill asked.
"Nope." (with big shit eating grin on face)
After the game we got up and went out the exit door to the stairwell. There was a big pile of Harv shit on the landing. The asshole had shit on the stairs so he wouldn't be gone from the game. What an idiot.

Anal About Poop's picture
l 100+ points

I'm like the reciprocal of IBS sufferers. When I travel or get stressed out my colon quits on me. The longest I've gone was 5 days, in Mexico! I even played Tijuana Roulette, where you go to random restaurants and drink the tap water. Nothing. I finally broke down and went to the doctor. He gave me some horse laxatives or something like that and told me to relax.

Lexy's picture

Who ever said that you would lie after a month doesn't know because I have emetophobia (fear of vomiting) and when i was small (9 yrs old) i thought that if i had the shits i would throw up. So i just wouldn't let myself go. And it was so painful. After a month a week they made me get a enema. But then i kept doing it bet never for that long. I stopped when i realized there was no connection.

Colton's picture

I've been constipated for over two weeks now and I can't take a shit! I don't even have the urge! so, I will be going to the doctors tomorrow. Damn, I sure hope my colon isn't infested with worms!

Queen of Sharts's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

If I'm really stressed out, I can't poop. Also once I was on a special diet and it made me sooooo constipated. I get REALLY grouchy when I can't poop, too!!

Don't be playin' with the Queen of Sharts

Don't be playin' with the Queen of Sharts

freddy krueger 16's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

Two days at the most. Pretty rare.

Anonymous Coward's picture

i went 10 days when i was at my gfs because i didnt want to go it there toilet haha when i got home it was solid poo and wouldnt flush i had to mash it up abit in the end

poopfreak's picture

i was afraid to poop as a child. Now i'm all about the dumping. The last time I was constipated was for three days, I ate about 1000 jellybeans.

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points

All those jellybeans, all that food coloring, it must have been one technicolor turd.
.....hugging bunnies since 1969

.....hugging bunnies since 1969

jmtdough's picture

never had this crap problem before. havent gone in 12 days, no bloating, no pain. so i have to take a laxative. very weird. also, if and when i do go, they are snake shits! weird new shape. went to the doc, need to have a colonoscopy....she must be ruling out colon cancer or something. anyone else like this?

DigitalTrauma's picture

Its common for me to only poop every 2 to 3 days, but the worst constipation I ever had lasted around 6 or 7 days. (This was probably due to a high protien/low carb diet I have been on.) Those last couple of days I was curled up in a ball feeling the pain. I couldn't even sleep the last night because of the agony. I couldn't stop thinking about all of the food I had eaten since my last dump and how it was all still inside of me. When I finally felt the urge to go after 6 or 7 days, I pushed and I pushed until I felt like I was going to rip open, but nothing had come out. I was ready to give up, so I reached back there to wipe just in case something slipped out undetected. On the first wipe I discovered a baseball sized lump of dried shit was partially out of my ass and was lodged in there stretching my sphinchter beyond belief. It crumbled a little bit like dirt when I wiped it, but for the most part it wasn't going anywhere. I wrapped a new piece of tp around my index finger and traced around the protrusion to get a better idea of the size. It had to be over 3 inches in diameter! I began to chip away at it a bit, then with a new handful of tp I squeezed it and it broke in half and crumbled into the toilet. Unfortunately, the other half was still plugging up my painfully stretched A-hole. I then recovered my index finger with tp and began to chip away at the sides of the mud plug. Finally I was able to push the rest out all in one cupcake shaped turd, creating a ceremonial splash. It took about 2 hours, 1/2 a roll of Charmin Ultra, 3 wet wipes and 4 flushes to finish the job. As I was thoroughly washing my hands, I felt the urge to go again. I barely had a chance to sit down before several waves of burning hot bloody diarrhea shot out of my injured anus, violently splashing the toilet bowl. After another round of wiping, flushing, and cleaning I was finally able to go to sleep for the first time in 40+ hours. All was back to normal after that except for the lingering pain and of course the trauma of the experience!

turdfan's picture
l 100+ points

When I was a teenager, before I figured out why I was so chronically constipated, I remember being plugged up for about 3-4 days one time. I finally got desperate and took a big dose of Milk of Magnesia (I hate that stuff) and got cleaned out. What a relief!!!

This Sucks's picture

Right now for about 2 days I havent taken a real poo. I found out that the medicine im taking has a adverse side affect of constipation. When i further investigated i had a dried huge plug ball of poo all trying to come out at one time and every time it hurts more and more that i tried. Ive started chipping away at it trying to get it out and now going to CVS to find some tools and medicine to get the damn thing out because it fucking hurts.

constantlyconstipated's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

this may sound hard to believe, but its 100% true. i've gone months without pooping. every time i have to go i just cross my legs and hold it. eventually, ill be really miserable and ill take some exlax and it comes out. these poops are too big to flush ive actually used a grocery bag and pulled it out of the toilet, then taken it directly to the trashcan. i think not im done with the constipation phase, ive been regular for about a month now. but im pretty sure ive spent like 90% of my life completely constipated.

turdfan's picture
l 100+ points

Dear Constantly Constipated:
What in the hell is your problem??? You need to see a psychiatrist before you kill yourself.

Hamster's picture
k 500+ points

I've been a week when i was in my teens and early twenties, but i get really uncomfortable after three days now and i've changed my diet somewhat!!

'constantly ...' Please tell me why you do this - crossing your legs and holding?? You'll make yourself ill!! Get rid of it - somewhere!! - when the urge strikes you. Do you just not like using toilets or what?

Miss Simone Scat's picture
k 500+ points

I have been about 3-4 days without a poop before. I once had a Boss who hadn't pooped in 2 months. The doctor said it was stress-related. I bet when she finally did poop she felt like a new woman.
Producing waste since 1967

Producing waste since 1967

Hamster's picture
k 500+ points

MSS - I bet too!! There's nothing like the satisfaction of a job well done!

Anonymous Coward's picture

The Longest was about 3-4 months. When I was a kid to teenager. Because I had chronic constipation for so long my body could hold it for weeks without me feeling any problems (x-rays shows that my intestines were twice as wide then they should be. The cause was found to be mental. Because going always hurt rock hard, size of a softball and sometimes as long as a baseball bat, not being able to really sit on the toilet and having to almost disjoint your legs just to get it to pass. It was something I didn't look forward too and put it off even though I knew the longer I waited the worse it would be.
This seemed to end when I started college, probably the extra greasy foods, perhaps made in less sanitary conditions, and the fact that it was a less private environment for me to suffer threw constipation, I have been regular ever since and I really feel it if I don't go every day.

it's still stuck's picture

It is going on 3 a lil over weeks now. I have always been constipated due to problems with my thyroid. Usually I can take a laxative and it helps. I took 4 in the past 72 hrs and it's still stuck. I get the feeling I have to go. Last night I felt like I had to go and tried as much as I could I had to stop trying to avoid some kind of internal bleeding. my stomach usually a 30" waist now looks as if I am 5 months pregnant. I called my doc and he sent in a prescription of which I got there to pick it up and they said it is just the over the counter laxative I have been taking for 3 days now. At this point. I do not want to eat any thing even if I did I do not think it would fit. AAAWWWWW GGGEEEEEE!!! I just want it to come out and it's still stuck.


I have a spinal cord injury, and I take a lot of painkillers that bind me up pretty good, normally I poop about once a week and it is normally pretty hard poo, I will pop about three stimulant laxatives and usually about 12 hours later I will give birth to a bloody mess of hard to sloppy poop.And I always have to plunge the toilet due to so much crap in the toilet.

CrapInMyHead's picture

I've had constipation for around a month. I ended up laying all day on the couch, my stomach was all swollen so I couldnt move freely without extreme pain. I ended up shitting all over my couch though, which was a huge relief, probably the best anal orgasm in my life. But it was a bit messy. Thats what you get for eating Burger King every day for a year. Well, dont try it at home.

pooptop's picture

Wow. Even thinking about this experience gives me chills. But I'm going to relate to you all. Partly, as a form of psychological processing and partly to help others who ever (God forbid) have to go through it.
My parents were visiting me, helping around the house like they do once in a while. I'm a new home owner and my mom and pops drop in from out of town to help me with some of the tougher jobs.
Everything was normal...meaning, there were no signs that things were about to go horribly wrong. I had been pooping a bit irregularly...once every two days and even then it was some rabbit pellets and very hard little poop stones.
But I was feeling kind of nauseating and excused myself to head inside and take care of business. I did feel a wave deep within me like a major one was brewing and I was going to nip it in the bud, so to speak.
So I sat. And sat. And sat. False alarm so I get up and go back outside and keep working. Wave hits again (second wave, for those keeping count) and find myself perch back atop my throne, this time with a magazine. I was going to wait the sucker out.
After working my way back and forth, I was still holding. I had the nausea still but nothing was moving and nothing seemed to be close. It didn't make sense. I had the urge, I had the means and I had a magazine. Nothing was going on down there. It was like my butthole was dead or something.
Back I go outside...working up a sweat, feeling very full and still kind of nauseated. Starting to feel that mean barbarian knocking at the gate. So in I go again (sorry for the redundancy but I feel it's important to report the prior attempts leading up to this...)
I'm back down again...different magazine this time. I'm reading, pushing, reading, pushing. I felt like I was giving birth. Literally. But nothing was moving. It was a breech baby apparently..maybe it was trying to come out sideways? I had no way of knowing. I just knew I was so cramped and nauseated that I could barely stand upright. But still, I couldn't coax it out no matter how hard I tried.
So I'm half limping, hunched over like Igor pacing the floors of my hallway. I decided to try the other bathroom in my house because I though the angle of the toilet had something to do with it. Like some kind of poo engineer, I was dissecting trajectories in my head and working out things like leverage, fulcrums and the like in an effort to lick this sucker and be gone with it.
This time there was no magazine. I was in too much panic. Full anxiety at this point so I was having sweats, nausea, cramps and a panic attack. My heart was racing, I felt faint and dizzy and was hot. I thought it was some kind of vasovagal effect but I didn't care what was going on. I just wanted it over.
I gave it my all....i was remembering watching old soap operas as a kid during birthing scenes...I was taking deep breaths and slow breaths and pushing with all I had. My stomach continued to cramp up beyond belief. It was unnatural.
I continued for about 9 minutes until I was stuck (literally) with what can only be described as a baseball sized something that was halfway in, halfway out of my (what used to be) dime sized starfish. I was experiencing pain at every quadrant of my body...I had apparently found the rare asshole nerve that distributes agony to every corner of extermities. Short of breath, sweating, tremors, pain...I was stuck. Literally. I tried to scoop the sucker out with my fingers...I didn't care what the ramifications were going to be, the stench, etc. I was doing to dig it out inch by inch.
I noticed that one side of my butthole was kind of blown it was starting to prolapse. Which only made sense because of the unnatural size of what was trying to exit. I swear I seriously feared tearing my asshole wide open and experiencing a hemmorage and almost immediate death.
So I called off the dogs.
Sadly, I did what I could to push the head back up into my now loaf sized colon and stood up. Still dizzy, still sick at my stomach, cramping and in pain, I looked in the mirror. I was white as a ghost. Transparent, almost.
I almost fainted as I gathered my pants and stood up. At this point, what I was doing couldn't really be considered 'walking.' I was hunched over, limping sideways and made my way to my door where I yelled for my mom.
That's right... a full grown man who can't shit yelling for his mommy. She said I looked like I was at death's door and I explained the situation to her. I told her I feared the worst and thought I'd be taking a trip to the emergency room.
She assured me there was no need for that but I reminded her that I was going to rip my asshole inside out trying to disperse of this brown bomb. She reached into her purse and pulled out a single little white plug.
A suppository. something I'd never used before so i doubted it's strength. I told her, 'you don't understand...that's like putting David up against Goliath. It's just not going to do anything to the baseball that is nestled up snugly and painfully in my hole.'
She demanded I give it a try.
The first issue was how do you get a suppository up a hole that is jam packed with impacted fecal matter like concrete, taking up every square inch of available space?
I did it...I just found an angle and rammed it up there.
More pain, more sweating, more cramps, more pain, more paleness. More hunching over. Finally, I sent my mom to a local convenient store to fetch more and get an enema because I feared the worst. The next stop was the Emergency Room and you have no idea how much I feared that situation. I pictured them having to actually cut my asshole open and remove the still born butt baby...I couldn't even bare the thought of it, even feeling like I was about to die.
So she took off...I had more panic. I didn't know what to do.
I mean this was like a turning point in my of those situations where you've never felt closer to God. The panic, the pain, the embarassment, the sheer conundrum of it all.
And so I felt it...a distinctive rumbling like I'd never felt the thunderous gallup of one thousand horses running through my colon. I raced (limped, ,hunched) to the toilet and took my post. I still feared the pain, the possible ripping of my was a full blown panic attack. So I beared down. With all my might, I beared down, took a deep breath and gave the push of my life.
SEERING, THUNDERING PAIN rushed from my ass to the tip of my toes and in an instant, it felt like an invisible force kicked me in the some kind of last minute Superbowl kick. A force that almost had me on the floor.
But the deed was done. What followed was a feeling of what can only be described as a monstrous python sliding out of my ass that seemed to last for a full minute. I had blown out the plug and the python was blazing a trail out of my ass, posthaste.
I sighed, locked up in pain. I gained my composure and balance and took a few deep breaths.
I was afraid to peer around and see what I had truly created. I was almost in denial but I knew I had to. I had to check for blood and I had to see what kind of beast had ripped it's way out of my nethermouth.
What I found was like a softball at the end of about 12" of a baseball bat. Thick, long and solid as hardwood. I was blown away. i was embarassed. I was relieved that there appeared to be no blood. I was relieved period. My battle was over. I had won. For now.
Immediately, I considered internal bleeding and the possibilities of complications from passing such an enormous beast. Would my asshole ever be the same? Was my once virgin butthole now blown out beyond use? Would i have to have retightening surgery to give me back the traction and control I once enjoyed and prided myself on?
All these questions swam through my head as I held my stomach in pain.
I had to break it up in several pieces and it was very hard, very resiliant and tough. Eventually, after about 5 flushes, it went down to the pits of hell back where it belonged. I took another deep sigh. I was convinced that my nightmare was over.
The beast was gone but I was traumatized beyond belief. About that time, my mom rolled up into the driveway and I met her at the door with the good news.
No emergency room visit and no blood or complications as far as I could tell. It was the first time I'd ever really talked about poop to my mom, as weird as that sounds. It was just one of those things that never really came up. And what a way to introduce it for discussion.
For the rest of the night and into the next day, I suffered. I had nausea and abdominal pain, the likes of which I'd never had. They lingered but eventually passed, like the traumatizing memories of that day.
Everytime i shit now I thank God that things go through. And I know to keep them moving one way or another. There's no way to tell what caused the colossal blockage except to speculate it was a bad diet with a lack of vegetables and roughage/fiber.
Either way, I was scared straight. I drink more water these days and eat better meals.
And I've never talked about it since that day.
I swear that this entire story is true. And I ask each and everyone of you to say a silent prayer right now that you've never been through it before like that. You may be sitting at a desk, on the couch or whatever...anything is better than being on the shitter with a baseball half in and half out of your asshole. Seriously.
I shudder at the mere thought of ever being in that situation away from my home shitter. It could have been catastrophic had I not had immediate access to that suppository.

random turd monster's picture

Dear pooptop,


ConstipatedNewbie's picture

Oh my god! Pooptop's story was so fucking hilarious! But I've been constipated for like 2 days! I DONT WANT THIS SHIT TO HAPPEN TO ME!

Anonymous Coward's picture

Damn I am a real coward aren't I? I used to poop about two to three day's a week saying that is normal. After I left work I started pooping once a week. Then I got married and did not go to the toilet for number two for at least three weeks and I mean at least three. When I saw my husband go every single day I thought there was a problem with me but as I said I am a real coward, I did not go to the doctors nor medicine. I ate a lot of fruit and veg, drank a 1,5ltr bottle of water a day but nothing still seemed to be working. I put on 30 kilos in a few months! I got very angry and wanted to argue with anybody. I went to the chemist (really my husband went for me because I am embarrased to tell I'm constipated for about a month) they gave him two different types of tablets and a syrup saying they are very effective, good I thought started taking them as soon as possible, the next day I only pooped about 5 chickpea sized solid stool. The next day I went to my GP, he gave me an enema. As soon as I put the enema in I urged to the toilet, I could not hold it in for more than 2mins :*( Except for poop every thing came out. It has been a day of using a syrup begging God it will help :((

MSG's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points

My longest was four days after an operation; the Percocet for pain kept me bottled up. Elsewhere on this forum I have told the epic story of final delivery, including manual disimpaction. I, too, thank God every time I have a normal bowel movement.

Bad Days's picture

The longest I've ever been constipated for was around six months. No joke. I've had this chronic constipation condition all my life. It was uncomftrable, painful, and I was miserable. I didn't poop out my mouth like people say you do, but I gained lots of weight. I had to go to the hospital and there they put a tube that went from my nose to my stomach inside me, that pretty much flushed me out. I literaly shit for 2 days straight. I'm cured now. =D

shitake boy's picture
l 100+ points

There are countless times that I have been constipated. The longest I have been constipated as far as I can remember has been four days. When I am constipated, I am trying every 1/2 hour to go on the toilet, in the hopes that I will get much needed relief. Most recently was last week, and I was constipated for about a day and a half. We were at my in-laws' house, and there were a lot of people there, because my wife's grandfather died last week. Needless to say, there were 2 bathrooms, and lots of people using them. One of the bathrooms was in the hallway, and the other was in the master bedroom. Both of which have great acoustics, and paper thin walls. This was the recipe for everyone hearing every fart and plop. I first went everytime I felt an urge, but used the bathroom in the hallway. I am a shameless shitter, so I am not afraid to go and poop where and when I need to. One point in this ordeal, after a futile and fruitless trip to the toilet, my brother in law said to me, "your o-ring must really hurt." I just said that fortunately it didn't, and this came with the IBS territory. I was determined to rid my body of this massive brown beast. So, I went to the toilet every 1/2 hour until finally, the relief came. This time I decided to use the bathroom in the master bedroom, so I could sit there as long as I needed to. Within a minute, the plug came out with a big splash, and relief was had. That was followed by about three waves of much looser poop. I then got up, wiped, and as I was pulling back on my pants, and flushed;, another intense wave hit. I immediately pulled my pants back down, and quickly sat back down on the toilet, for another three waves of the same, and then I tried to get up another four times to join the group, when another wave hit every time i got up. When all was said and done I had a total of ten waves and flushed the toilet 14 times in a 45 minute period. Unfortunately, I have many other stories similar to that, but will save them for another time.

In search of the ever evasive BM

In search of the ever evasive BM

LeandraCullen's picture
Comment Quality Moderatork 500+ points

The longest was 2 weeks, after I had an operation, the normal meds I was allergic to, so the ones they gave me blocked me up for a little over 2 weeks
I will never shit somewhere that only has that horrible, scratchy brand of toilet paper. That stuff sucks!

The Original Grasshopper

Anonymous Coward's picture

I just got over a 4 dy stint which I'm sure was caused by dehydration. I tried all sorts of random home remedies to get things moving..olive oil, lots of fruit tons of water...the fourth day I had some serious bloat and pain in my abdomen so I pulled out the glycerin suppositories and chocolate exlax. Decided to go with the glycerin first as it is supposedly 'fast acting' ...nothing happened so I broke off 2 pieces of chocolately exlax, popped them in my mouth and went to bed with dreams of waking up and taking a relieving giant dump. Woke up ...nothing...everywhere I have read said not to drink coffee...however I dont function mentally without I brewed up a super strong pot of coffee took two sips and had to literally run to the washroom where I sat and showed the toilet no love.
I have never felt better..seriously.

spotted_pooper's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

Poop shooter, it can happen. I couldn't go to the bathroom for over 2 weeks because of being on Trazadone (and already having IBS-chronic-C) and I finally staggered to the health center, holding my stomach. I was extremely bloated and felt like I had swallowed a bowling ball. They took an x-ray because they thought something was SEVERELY wrong with me, but no- my intestines were quite literally CLOGGED. They gave me milk of magnesia, and NOTHING happened. I had to come back and get this magnesium sulfate- the most horrible substance known to man. It tastes like very sour, salty melted lemon jello (and they claim it tastes like sprite.) A couple of days later I was in the bathroom for 13 hours with a nasty liquefied bloody mess emitting from me, sweating, feeling extremely nauseous, and having some of the worst stomach cramps in my life.

The lessons I have learned are:
Do NOT take trazadone for Insomnia.
Use Miralax and Stool softeners.

However I still have incidents of over a week with no poop. :(

Kay O. Pectate's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

I've gone an entire week a few times in my life. Recently it was due to surgery. The surgery was on my hand so I can only imagine it was the general anesthesia that slowed my system down.

I've also had issues stemming from long term antidepressant use. I have been off & on them for the past 18 years. Most of them constipate me.

The worst were the old tricyclics. I was literally shitting rocks once a week when I took them. Now that I am on SSRI's and take stool softeners, I go every 3 or 4 days. Still not as often as I'd like but I can live with it.

I'm so poopular!'s picture

I've had the constipatory type IBS for a 5 years now and the longest it's taken to drop the kids off at the pool was 7 days. Oh, sure, there were the occasional few rabbit poop projectiles during the week that I thought were going to be diamonds by the time they made their exit due to the pressure required to eject them, but really nothing substantial appeared even though I was eating somewhat normally.

Finally, after including copious amounts of fiber in my diet after day #3 with no relief, and a couple of Colace after day #5, I felt the pain of a colon as enthusiastic about getting going, with all the pain of metal grinding on metal, as a V8 engine being started with no oil. I could just feel the train wheels breaking free of the track.

At the end, my o-ring was greeted by a hard wall of pellets which I'm sure caused the nice little split I felt open for each square wheel of Count Chocula's train to roll over on the way through the tunnel.

Relieved at last, the result required some admiration before flushing and the realization that a weeks worth of food had boarded up and was headed out. Relief immediately swung to apprehension and I was forced to complete my deliveries in pain.

Fissures, I thought, are only supposed to be around Volcanoes. I know now otherwise.

Shitless in Florida's picture

In response to: poop shooter's post
"Also, any who answered 3 weeks - month has to be lying. Your shit would come out of your mouth by then and you would probably be dead!"

Well, I have gone 3 weeks without having a bowel movement and at no point was I shitting out of my mouth nor did I come close to dying! As of right now, it has been 22 days since the last time I took a dump. 22 fucking days and you had better believe that I am feeling rather shitty right now! The last time it went this long, I took a stimulant laxative and that made me feel so much worse than just being backed up. The bastard turd ripped my arse hole! Not only that, but I was vomiting and shitting for more than 2 hours straight following just one dose (2 tabs)! 3 days ago I started taking Phillips stool softener and laxatives together and so far nothing has happened. I swear, at night when I am trying to go to sleep it feels like I am being cut from the inside out. I can feel my shit moving, albeit slowly, and it HAS to be hard as hell for it to be cutting like it is. Tomorrow I am using a men's catheter and a cath syringe and running some warm water 2 feet up my arse to soften the shit that way.
My husband keeps telling me to drink prune juice...been there, done that. I have MS and lupus...and am on some heavy duty pain meds. This happens about once every 3-5 months where I will get backed up beyond a week. Even though I only drink water (a lot of it too!) and keep up on my fiber intake, I still get backed up. It sucks!
Anyway...I'm not dead and I'm not lying. The next time you go in for a doctor's visit, ask your doc if it is humanly possible to go 3 weeks without taking a shit. You'll be surprised! It happens more often than you may think! Just look at the votes for the question, more than 20% have gone 1-3 weeks without a shit!

Anonymous Coward's picture

More than a month. When I was a kid my sister kept complaining about the smell of my poops we shared a room connected

to a bathroom. Being the age I was. I wanted to be her best friend really bad she was my cool older sister!So I

started not pooping when I had urges till I couldn't wait any longer then I would go to the bathroom and let out as

little as possible to stop the urge. At the start I would generally go a couple days without pooping then I would let

out a little inch or two long ribbon of poop never completely emptying. After a while my poops got firmer and thicker I

remember it being hard to pinch through them to break off the ends. Also the frequency of my urges slowed down over

time. And my hunger level dropped way off as well. Till with out even realizing it I had gotten fully backed up.

I remember I was sitting in class one day and I had the worst pain in my stomach like something was ripping inside me

or being cut and at the same time I uncontrollable constant urges to poop. If the poop hadn't been so thick and firm

i'm sure I would have filled my pants in front of my friends. When I could sort of regain my composure and speak I

asked to go to the bathroom, I tried to walk out of the room normally but I was in severe pain. When I got to the

bathroom I still couldn't poop even though my body was pushing as hard as it could. For 25 mins I sat there till it was

time for my next class, I only had one more class so I went and sat there in agony with my body almost constantly

involuntarily trying to force the poop out till school was over.

I lived close enough to the school that I walked or rode my bike. I didn't want to poop at home because of my sister

phobia but I realized if I didn't poop I would probably need to go to the hospital. So I went to a park near our house

that had a pretty deep woods. when I had gotten pretty deep and found a fallen branch to sit on I started to push after

a while the log began to move a little but it was too thick to pass through my anus and I was beginning to feel like I

might tear so with all my might I squeezed it to make the mass small enough to fit through. It was so exhausting. For

over thirty minutes I pushed out a tiny ammount then squeezed pushed then squeezed. I looked down between my legs and

could see about a 2.5 inch thick dark brown clay looking mass hanging out of me.

After about 16 inches had been pushed out of me like that my body had a huge contraction I felt my anus stretch

painfully wide for a fraction of a second then the clay like part ended and a huge mass of slightly softer poop rushed

out of me. This poop was still quite solid but not so much so that my anus was being torn by it. I'd guess another 16

to 24 inches of poop came out of me in about 1 second.

I felt extreme relief at this point but I felt like I had more in me but when I pushed I couldn't get it out. I was

feeling so much better decided to pull up my pants and start heading home. The pile of poop I let out was huge I

couldn't believe it all came out of me. But I honestly felt 10 pounds lighter and my tummy was noticeably trimmer and

wasn't firm to the touch like it had been before.

That night while sleeping I woke up with another urge to poop. I didn't want to bother my sister but I got up to go to

the bathroom. When I sat down I thought about doing the pinch but after the relief I had felt earlier I just wanted to

be empty so I let it all out. And for the first time in over a year I was completely empty. I have to admit it felt

very strange after needing to poop at some level constantly for so long. when I looked in the toilet there was another

log that was basically the same as the earlier softer poop it was about 16 inches long and 2 inches wide. Luckly this

was before low flow toilets and our mega flush was able to handle it with out too much trouble. When my sister woke up

she said it stank like poo which it did, I was totally embarrased but I felt so much better.

After that my toilet habits for a long time were basically hold it till I had a bad urge which after that stretching

was about every other week, I continued going to that same woods to poop till I was done with high school and moved out

of my parents house.

At the time most of this seemed normal to me. Till high school when I started to realize it wasn't normal but I still

did it anyways.

sittingpretty's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points

To the best of my knowledge, I have been constipated for over 40 years.
...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

kidsensation23's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

I have gone (or not gone as the case may be) for 19 days. I finally got some relief from a Gertrude Hawk sugar free peanut butter and chocolate santa. God bless sorbitol

Con Stee-Pated's picture

2-3 weeks whilst at my aunts house one summer. I would not crap in her toilet.

Right now, it's been about 4 days and I am starting to get uncomfortably backed up. I just took 2 senna so I hope for some relief soon.

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