Credit for this poll goes to KOC.
My most memorable pooping experience occurred at a Wal-Mart.
Had to say public (department store, other) because my most memorable poop experience occurred in a Rite-Aid bathroom. My only case of intentional turd terrorism, but it least it stopped some girl from doing drugs. _______Broccoli!
At home about three years ago was my most memorable. Mine was a perfect turd. One piece, about 14-16 inches long, girth that stretched but did not tear or cause pain, wet enough to exit easily, splashless entry. Even before looking back to check the turd, I knew this was something special. One wipe, zero residue or skid marks.
I had to vote other because I didn't see public school bathroom listed. I had many, many memorable experiences with my friends, shooting the breeze and joking around on the open stalls. Perhaps you had to be there to know just what a bonding experience it was, but I've written about it quite frequently on the site.
It was a formative thing for me.
How do you think I got the name "Dumpster"? But that is another story, for another day.
Wow Chuck, I'm very happy for you. You should have mounted it. My most memorable and perfect shit came at work about 25 years ago. I was still a young pup in my early 20's and had no particular irritable bowel problems. I was walking down the hallway nearing the men's room with no intention of going in there when it hit me. I felt fine one second and the next second I knew that I would shit my pants if I didn't hurry into the shitter. Even though I was only about 20 feet from the john, I barely made it. I guess my lunch forced it out. (a friend of mine used to talk about layers in our bowels with gas pockets in-between. Don't know how scientific that was) Anyway, it came out in one fell poop. My ass exploded like an M-80, and just that quickly, it was over. The toilet was full, the place smelled horrible. I felt great and was outta there in record time. Since then there have been quite a few attacks like that but never have I been so fortunate as to have been that close to the toilet.
At a hockey arena when I was five years old I almost shit myself in full hockey gear. I was on the bench when it hit me (diarheea cramps) and I told the coach "I really have to go to the bathroom", he said wait a few minutes, I think I started crying because I knew I was not gonna make it, he saw me, grabbed me, opened the door and dragged me across the ice while the game was going on and got me to the other side of the ice where my Dad was waiting. He thought I was hurt and I told him I had to go, we just made it. You've never seen panic in a parents face until you've seen him realize most of that hockey equipment had to come off before I could do the deed.
oh my most memorable poop was when i was going on holiday in China on a train, it was a grotty little cabin at the end of the train and ther was a wooden plank on the floor with a large hole. i remember looking at the train tracks down the hole and hoping i wouldnt fall down.
I said "outdoor location." I was camping, and had waited till I really had to go bad because I dreaded having to squat, avoid my shoes, teeter tottering there etc.. I had been farting my ass off and people started begging me to go take a shit. So I finally did and it was soooo awesome once I figured out I could put my back up against a tree for stability. The turd was so perfect I invited others to come look at it. They applauded. My eyes welled up with pride. I know I'll be too eager next time to be able to shit that way again. It's kind of sad.
"Those who write on shithouse walls, roll their shit into little balls. Those who read their words of wit, eat those little balls of shit." Author Unknown
My most memorable pooping experience occurred in the study at home. I thought it was just a fart.
I picked other. It was in a Club Med in Cancun, Mexico.
Once I got dehydrated and was working all kinds of overtime, I had to take a dump at work, which I hate to do, but I followed the how to poop at work guidelines. I found a safe haven, dropped traou and started downloading a huge loaf that was so dry you could have rolled it down the hallway without leaving a mark. It got stuck halfway out. I couldn't pinch it off no matter how hard I tried and my sphincter was wide open with no relief in site for what seemed like 20 minutes. As I sat there desperately trying to pinch it off to no avail, I realized that the only way out was a digital extraction. I reached back, stuck my finger in the hole and began what had to be the grossest procedure I had ever done. By the end, my finger was brown and stinky and my sphincter was bloody and sore. I managed to clean up some of the blood and I washed my hands for at least 10 minutes but I could not get the smell off my finger. I was sitting at my computer and I could smell my finger when I used my keyboard. I requisitioned a new keyboard and actually washed my hand with diluted bleach when I got home. I also started a daily regimen of Metamucil that I maintain to this day. Man, nothing beats a smooth move and nothing sucks like a logjam.
Those who copy graffitied stalls While munching on those little balls Inside their pants they dare to shit And copy someone else’s whit
Other: the Louvre in Paris. I was amidst all this great art, but all I could think was, I'm gonna crap my pants if I don't find the bathroom immédiatement. Got there just in time. Most satisfying dump ever. My little contribution to French culture.
PPP writes: "It got stuck halfway out. I couldn't pinch it off no matter how hard I tried and my sphincter was wide open with no relief in site for what seemed like 20 minutes."
To which I respond, in the immortal words of the late, great Logjam: "Hedge clippers."
Now, AB, "most memorable poop experience" is severly different from "your favorite place to shit".
I voted portajohn. Nothign like eating camp food for a week and having explosive diharrea all over a crapper you don't have to clean and cant clog up.
Alas, I would have given ANYTHING for a set of rusty hedge clippers. Hard to find a good set of clippers in the poop stalls at the office.
I voted "Outdoor". It's the only poop story I have; which has been posted here, and now I'm fresh outta poop. I guess I could HOPE that some more unfortunate poop problems happen to me so I'll have something to submit, but then... maybe I'm not THAT dedicated.
I know, KOC, and I'm sorry but how many people's favorite place to shit is in a trashcan?
What I should have said was "Your favorite shitting experience took place in." Sorry. Memorable sounded better.
I'm surprised there aren't more votes for option 5. People shit in/on Dumpsters all the time.
I voted for Other Bathroom. Happened to be a gas station that saved my shorts. Story coming soon of the dredful experience.
_______Regional POWER POOPING CHAMPION 1988-2006 Poop Shooter!
I want to hear the experiences of the trash can people. What would bring someone to shit in a trash can? That has to be an interesting story! _______Broccoli!
Note the capital D in TD's post.
AB, you should have just left it the way it sent it to you. NOw it doesent make as much sense. But if the toilet was busted, and there's no urinal, the next place is the trash can.
If poop shooter were a vegitarian, would he be called salad shooter? Buy the way, how do they keep them dang gas station bathrooms so clean. I especially like the key chained to the hubcap.
LOL....that's funny 3P. Back in my younger days I was called Pea Shooter
when i was out in the alaska wilderness I had to take a mad dump at night. I stepped outside and rolled down my pants and began to let a big one roll out. I heard a ruffle behind some bushes and saw a bear. Quickly, I covered myself in shit and played dead. The bear had one wiff of my stinky poo boday and ran into the river and drowned. the end
my most memoriable pooping experince would be the time i was on a hunting trip with my buddy! We were on our way home and i had to poop so bad it hurt! I looked around and all i could find was a MardiGras cup and an old McDonlods bag. But i had to go and we were in the middle of no where! I told my friend to hold the wheel and i let it go in the cup! I filled the cup up with about one log! when i was done i wiped with the only toiletry item i had! i have to admit it didnt feel good at all, but i was still relieved. When all this was done i threw it all out the window but i didnt realize that a 18 wheeler was close behind. when i threw my poop out it hit the grill of the truck and splattered everywhere! That was my most memoriable poop ever and i am glad i could share it with you!
Once when I was little, I went to the store for my auntie to buy her some asprin. I took the bus down town and made my purchase, on the way home I looked around and my sack from the store was gone, I must have left it at the bus stop. I started crying (like a little kid would do) and yelling "My assburns, my assburns" The bus driver got really mad and said, "Hey kid, stick it out the window until it cools off!"
You made that up! It still made me laugh, though.
If it's funny, it is 50% true. If it is halarious, it is true.
PPP, I'm laughing my ass off. With that accent you must also be from the south.
_______"Those who write on shithouse walls, roll their shit into little balls. Those who read their words of wit, eat those little balls of shit." Author Unknown
My most memorable poop occured in a CAR. Please refer to The Trade-In_______www.mydailypoop.com
I love the capital italicized word Car.
AB, TSV, now doo you see why a person might shit in a trashcan/dumpster? Because the toilet was full, no urinal, sink too high= trashcan.
Cant get in bathroom= dumpster.
In a cup, and in containers.
Dumpster, the shitter of last resort. _______Send all your money to Bilgepump, or to Dave!
You mean to tell me we DON'T have any Dumpster dumping stories? I have to go do a search!
I'd have to say using a bucket is about the weirdest thing for me. I had a good reason--all the toilets were full and there was no water supply. _______I'm the only geek I know who has to flush twice. Or who clicks on links in people's sigs.
I said other, so I shall now elaborate. My most memorable poop experience happened in a... BATHTUB!!!!!!!!!!! I caught out a poo from my poop chute, and announced it to the house.Poop on!
-Poopgirl
I chose other. Only cause it took place over the course of a few days: Most of it at home, but the grand finale was in the hospital.
In a hospital bed. The first time I pooed on my own in nearly a month. My sister called right after and asked if I pooed yet, I said yes and she said "what a coincidence, I just pooed out my baby." _______Number One . . . I order you to take a number two.
I chose other, and I'll tell you why. After a night of particularly heavy drinking and drug abuse(I'm sober now for 3 years), I woke up curled up in my old guitar case. Oh, I almost forgot to mention, the guitar case was splattered and beginning to fill,...with shit. I assume, and still have no recollection of this, that I must have passed out there and then shit myself.
The really gross part of the whole story occurred AFTER the cleanup. I hosed out the felt-lined dumping ground, and then propped it open to dry. A few days later it was a literal petri dish of fungi, and really weird looking experiments, all growing from the inside of my old guitar case. Wow, definately a shit to remember!
I had been drinking at a bar downtown with my friend and she was too drunk to drive home. A guy friend of ours offered to let us walk with him to his house and crash on the couches there. I didn't realize that his roommates were a married couple with 2 small kids. I awoke to children asking "mommy who are those people?" and the mother saying, "oh those are just Sean's friends."
The house was two stories. The mom and kids went back up starts and then I realized that I had to go pee and poop. My friend and Sean were still sleeping. I tip-toed around the downstairs and I could not find a bathroom. Although I had to poop, the need to pee was even stronger... I did not want to go upstairs and deal with some unknown family after already crashing out in their living room. I looked around the downstairs some more and briefly considered peeing in the kitchen sink to at least relieve some of that pressure.
I decided that could be disastrous and awkward if either of my friends were to wake up or if the family came downstairs and saw my naked ass sitting in the sink.
I finally hatched a plan and grabbed some paper towels from the kitchen and went outside and relieved myself against the side of the house. No one ever knew.
My most memorable crapingtookplace in theh dorm lavatory. 2nd floor, east wing, Sneed Hall, TX Tech, about seven years ago. Maybe one day, I'll report it._______I have a book published. The title...it's "Brown Spots on the Walls".
Generally I try to poop quietly when in public. But I once drove semi-long distance to an art gallary and smoked a little green in the parking lot - my rectum was bulging man, I had to let it out. It came out so hard and loud that I no longer cared - just gave in to it and experienced fecal-nervana. I walked out of that bathroom beaming with joy. Since then, I have found enjoyment in shitting loud for others - I am now a crap exhibitionist and let fly the sounds of shit.
I was at this club and we were almost about to leave and I was buzzed and had to take a shit. So I went to the bathroom in the club but could not shit for my life I guess cause I was buzzed and there were too many people in the restroom of the club. So we left after I got out of the restroom, I made some excuse up to leave so I can go home and take a shit. We lived 2 blocks away but had parked by the club so we walked to the car. Well as I was walking to the car I could not hold it in anymore and I shit in my pants. My roomate as we were walking to the car asked me what the hell was that smell was and I had told him I did not know what it was, knowing i shit in my pants and it was running down my ass and down my legs. When we got in the car the smell was more prevelant and he had asked me again what the hell was that smell was and once again I had told him I did not know, so he rolled down the windows and we drove home. I threw those pants away i was wearng and took a shower when i got home.
Phone booth. I was sick and tried called home for a ride. The booth was one of those old glass and aluminum affairs with a folding door. Damn door got stuck. I puked and shit at the same time. Big time diarrhea. There was a puddle of gruesome yuck on the floor. I was so sick I said to hell with it. No idea how to clean up such a mess anyway. Once I got the door open I had to walk home anyway.
My most memorable poop experience occured in a retail store. after I came out of the stall, it was out out of order most of the day. Toilet clogging at its finest. _______ Jammin' lo'flo's since 1977.
i was very proud of the size of poop i had made and so i decided not to flush and let someone else see my trophy. The next person to use the bathroom was my little sister. I have to say that the look on her face was absolutely priceless though whether it was a look of awe from my amazing feat or one of jealousy or maybe even disgust i shall never know.
I think my best experience happened at home a year or two ago. I guess I lucked out and ate the optimum combination of something. Anyway, I nearly filled the bowl to the water line with perfect turds. Slightly larger than normal, and perfect firmness.
For me my best dumps are the ones that make me feel five pounds lighter! They are rare but when they happen ahhhhhhhhhhhhh! Sweet relief!_______The Thunderous Crapper 63 Enjoying home toilet advantage since 2004!
When I was 7 years old, in the crapper at the last day of pool.
I love it when Ron White (blue collar comedy tour) says, "Have you ever crapped so big your pants fit better?...I'm one big crap away from backing into a whole new wardrobe." _______"Can you spare a square?" "No, I don't have a square to spare."
PPP - Years ago, around the time of my Viv story, a girl I worked with got real bad constipation, and her tummy was quite swollen - I can vouch for that. A couple of days later, she proudly announced to me, 'I've been!!!' - and showed me her much flatter tummy. I guess her jeans certainly did fit her better.
I have 2 tales:
I was in the hosptial with a case of asthma. It felt like I was trying to breathe with my head in a bucket of pureed Jell-o. When they were checking me in at the E/R, they hooked up an IV and gave me a general antibiotic through the tube. By the next morning, this stuff had cleaned out my intestines. I'm sitting in my bed when a cute nurse and a cuter 'vampire' (phlebotomist) came in to take care of me. I got hit with the worst case of the runs imaginable. I'm screaming "I need the bed pan right now. Get me the bed pan!" The nurse said "Just one more thing..." and I lost control. Right in front of a pair of beauties. They stripped the bed and changed it while I got cleaned up. Someone got me some PJ's and I lay back down. The ladies finshed what they had to do and left. I felt so humiliated. I was doing a student internship there. I couldn't look either of them in the eye for a good month thereafter.
Second story- I was visiting my girlfriend in her college dorm and had to drop a log. Instead of going down 3 flights and across the lawn to the guy's dorm, she snuck me down the hall to the girl's loo. I'm sitting when the door opens and I hear her Resident Assistant walk in with a friend. I finish as quietly as possible, wash my hands quickly and dive into the hall before they see me. We never got caught.
_______You have the right to remain Silent but Deadly....
(I know ... double posting....)
A buddy of mine "Fred" had to spend the weekend in jail for fighting. They put him in a cell with "Mr. Bad-Ass", the meanest, biggest ... you can imagine. Four bunks, all four mattresses were on B/A's bunk, and the rack above him was secured against the wall like a destroyer bunk. "They tell me I gots to let you sleep here. You can have the top rack on the other wall, but I'm NOT giving you one of my mattresses." Fred climbs onto the springs and stretches out, trying to get comfortable. One of the guards comes by and hands Fred a blanket. B/A grabs it and stuffs it under his bunk. "You get that rack. Nothing else!" B/A went back to looking at his Biker Mag.
Fred climbed down and stepped over to the toilet. He turned around and opened his pants when his roomie smacked him in the head with the magazine. "NOBODY USES MY TOILET BUT ME! NOBODY!" Fred carefully climbed back up onto his bunk and fought the turtle head. The guard yelled that B/A had a visitor. B/A grabbed the toilet paper roll and said "You use my toilet and I'll kill you." He left with the guard.
Fred carefully pulled back the blankets on B/A's bunk, and dropped a log on the top mattress. He wiped with the sheets and remade the bed. B/A came back and sniffed the air. "Did you use my toilet?" Fred climbed onto his bunk and shook his head 'No'. "Good. Nobody uses my toilet but me." B/A flops onto the bed and feels a SQUISH! He jumps up and pulls back the blankets.
When the guards got there, Fred was hugging the wall and jumping to keep B/A from grabbing him. When the cell door opened, Fred looked over and B/A snatched his ankle, pulling him off the rack. Fred hit his shoulder on the edge of the bunk, but the guards covered him before he got stomped.
They took him to the infirmary where they took great care of him. Nobody had ever stood up to B/A before. He was released that Monday morning and has never been in trouble since.
Robo - first post, second story! You say, 'we never got caught'! Was your g/f actually in the stall with you then?? Very intimate pooping if so!!
She had gotten called away from guard dooty outside by her roommate. Roommie forgot her key and got locked out. G/f saw me run into the hall and met me halfway between the 2 doors. Nobody saw my short solo dash.
Thank you for the clarification! Even in that emergency situation, with the threat of impending discovery, I note that you washed your hands! Good on you!! An example to some!!
I confess. I just rinsed, but I was very tidy in my actions. My nails were clean.
That's ok!! Often in public toilets that's all you can do anyway - when there's no soap! Much better than nothing.
My most memorable was when I was staying with at my Dad's house. No working plumbing, located in the woods about 10 miles out of town.
I usually tried to wait until we went into town to take my number, but on this day I was home alone. I couldn't bear the pressure on my back door any longer, so like the rest of them I grabbed the roll that sat on a table near the door and headed toward a tree stump behind the shed.
I sat on the stump and hung my bung over the edge. With one slight push the whole loaf slid out with ease. It was soft, not too slimy, warm, and all in one piece. I knew it was something special. I stood up to view the most spectacular... no... the most incredible... no... the most GLORIOUS turd I have ever laid (eyes on).
The next day, still proud of myself for laying such a glorious piece of art, I went to review my masterpiece. But to my dismay, it was gone.
I don't know what really happened to it. But I imagine some animal used it for a nest.
Most likely a nest made by the eastern yellow tufted shitmouse.
I voted home, but with the IBS of the last year or so, the memories are fading. The surroundings were comfortable, there was no rush, and I was graced by a perfect slider. The cleanup was a snap, and I was left with the feeling of wanting to lay next to it and have a cigarette.
My Glorious shit was on a wonderful day. I was on the beach in my costume, when my ass started screaming at me to have a poop. There was nowhere around with toilets, so i dug a hole (small enough for a child to find the shit and start playing with it) and started to have a shit in there. it came out all in one rush, a nice little banana shape, with a slightly green colour to it. I was proud, and didnt want to bury it, so i made a sand castle and put it ontop of that, in all its glory. May Mr. Turd R.I.P
There's nothing like shitting outside, as I've done on a few camping trips. Crouching down, squeezing out a turd while the sun is shining and the birds are singing, all the while wondering if you're going to be photographed by a satellite and wind up all over the internet on Google Earth.
I went to my family room in my basement, and noticed a red plastic cup sitting on the table. I later (after quizzing the crap out of my brother and boyfriend) discovered my boyfriend took a CRAP in the cup and LEFT IT on the table!!!! He said "I had a terrible stomach cramp...blah blah blah" The bathroom was TEN stairs up from the basement....What a lazy douche!!!! Nasty.
I liked the portapotties because I like the sound of my dump hitting the water_______Russell the shitting queen
Hey one time I was at the hospital and had to go to the bathroom really bad, it was a number 2 so when they were taking x-rays of my arm I could not hold it anymore. I just lt it out I was so embarrassed.
I was in the hospital with severe pneumonia and was given a stool softener with breakfast so there would be no more strain on a heart that has almost stopped once. I was sitting on the edge of the bed while a surgeon prepared to stick the biggest needle I ever saw through my back and into my lung cavity to draw off fluid when the stool softener kicked in. I explained my dilemma and both the surgeon and my family doc went out in the hall while I filled the pot in one of those commode chairs almost to overflowing with the softest and one of the stinkiest shits of my career.
When the docs reentered the room a cute little RN had removed the pot but the smell lingered. The needle procedure was to be conducted sans anaesthesia with a hypodermic roughly the size of a caulking gun. I was praying that the surgeon would not black out from oxygen starvation during the procedure, a sobering, and embarrassing experience.
_______Eat chilies and feel the burn!!
USABIDET: Wash -- don't wipe!Toilet paper and politics share common ground: they both just smear poop.usabidet.com
The Poop Business Card HolderDon't let your boss see it...
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