On August 6, the bright lights of British television shined on me as I interviewed with the BBC for a documentary about toilets - thus solidifying my eminence as America's foremost authority on non-porno Internet poop.

It started a few months ago, when a British production company emailed me. They're putting together a documentary on toilets, they said. They would be coming to NYC in a few weeks, and could they film with me?

I managed to work them into my schedule.

The filming was to take place in two parts. Monday morning, I would take them to the bathroom at Bubby's Restaurant in Tribeca and talk about its giant urinal. Monday night, I would sit with them and talk about PoopReport.

Here's how they describe the documentary on their site:

FLUSH is an entertaining series of funny revelations about the lives of our loos with Claudia Winkleman. Claudia has traveled the world and seen more than her fair share of the world's loos. *Now she's going on a journey like no other - to discover what really goes on behind closed doors.

FLUSH will investigate the design, etiquette, scandal, cinema, psychology and hidden culture of the smallest room in the house. It will flush out the bizarre stories and characters from the depths of the toilet underworld. It's a dirty job, but Claudia's going to do it.

Because I am a minor celebrity, this wasn't just a wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am kind of filming. They regaled me with the respect my stature commands - treating my girlfriend and I to a pre-interview drink Sunday night at the posh Gramercy Park Hotel, and even springing for our cab ride home.

The urinal at Bubby's -- three times as big as a urinal needs to be.

On the morning of the interview, I skipped out of work and met up with the crew at Bubby's. We filmed a small segment of me telling Claudia about the giant urinal.

The plan - as befitting my stature as a minor celebrity - was that they would pick me up outside of work at 6:00, and drive me to the interview location. Well, I ended up having to take the subway. But I forgave them their transgression and decided to go ahead with the interview anyway.

The interview took place at the posh Upper East Side apartment of Greta Garbage, a famous author who has a book about bathrooms coming out in October. Accompanying me was Jaybill, PoopReport's loyal systems guy (and webmaster of NYC.makemusic.org, an NYC music scene site).

The interview took about 20 minutes. We talked about the genesis of PoopReport, my philosophy on poop humor, my favorite toilets, the online poop community, and things like that. Although I didn't get to see the dailies, I'm sure my answers were incredibly enlightening and valuable to the documentary.

After the interview, Greta gave me some copies of her books.

The documentary will air in November on the BBC. They said they'll send me a copy, so hopefully I'll be able to digitize the important bits. If the documentary is successful enough (and I fail to comprehend how a documentary about toilets could be anything less than a complete success), perhaps it'll make its way across the pond...

Below you'll see some pictures from my experience. This is what fame looks like, my friends. I am a star.

The cameraman and Sean, the Director, discuss the perfect angle to capture my incredible glory.

My glory is captured.

I swear I'm not as lecherous as this picture makes me look.

Claudia and I, moments before the interview begins.

During a break, Claudia enjoys PoopReport.

Claudia poses for a picture with the site.

Poor Jaybill, I thought they were going to interview him too, but apparently my incredibly magnetic on-camera presence meant they didn't need him. Sorry, dude.

This is probably the worst picture Claudia has ever taken. I assure you she doesn't really look like that. Here's her press picture below.

Quite a difference, huh?

-- Dave

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