Good one, made me laugh this one, and the bit about the Frenchie cleaing your shit was just the best! More like this please..

What great improvisation in the face of difficulty! What a mentos moment!

Serves them right for making toilets that are just litle holes in the ground.

I hate public shitters, ESPECIALLY, after I have followed you into one. I have seen some dusgusting public toilets and have a near phobeia from using them anymore. I will save my shitting for home and office ONLY! HOME, because it is safe, clean and comfortable: OFFICE, beacuse I get paid for it!

Shameful shitter!!!

Love the tory prose. Bravo my good man!!

God save the Queen!!

Truly inspired improvisation upon leaving the powder room (do men call it that, too?) Hard to believe that the French believe themselves to be so ultra-civilized and ultra-chic and yet they expect people to poo in a hole. With all the rich cream and butter in their diets you'd think they would want more comfort when it comes to relieving themselves on public transportation.

'The chocolate machine'--priceless!

Those 'holes in the floor' are known as Turkish toilets. In his book, The Last Time I Saw Paris, Eliot Paul describes how one had to be 'blackjacked by nature into using one of these contraptions'

Mom loved Paris and French culture, but her fidelity was sorely tried when she had a massive attack of diarrhea in Paris. She was visitng Pere Lachaise Cemetary and was chagrined to discover that the only toilet available was a Turkish toilet. And she was in a skirt and pantyhose. She managed but it was hell.

The squat toilets are actually best for crapping. Only problem is the floors are often filthy and there's the problem of what to do with your trousers, skirt hem, pantyhose, etc. And as for French TP--ne marche pas!

My friends just came back from Paris, France and they said the men literally piss on the street and they have crews come by to hose the streets down at night and the place smells like old urine. She said the walls are all stained from years of pissing on the walls! Weird.

She also said dogs shit on the srteet and no one cares and that a crew comes by with big motorcycle mounted vacuum cleaners to scoop them up. In fact, this is how I found the "PoopReport"! I was curious about a motor cycle mounted dog crap sucking vacuum cleaner and was trying to look it up on the internet and found you crazy bastards (and bastardettes).

Can any of you tell me how to find a picture or information on this devise?

im just here to make a stupid comment that takes up alot of room. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!hhhhhhh

So, regardless of the censorship (sorry if I offended anyone) I am still wondering (sorry about that if this is a sensitive issue) if there is anyone (this would include all races and intelligence levels) out there who knows where to find one of those (naught word coming up) shit sucking devices they use in France?

I loved your story. Laughed a good while and the ending was priceless.

Shit sucking is what I looked up - this is not what I expected. Let's say: Lissy dyke cunt, berkeley ca

she's an ex junkie whore and a stinking cunt

Damn French bastards! I would have just left them the mess too if they cleared their throats and got pushy. However, on their way into the bathroom I would have pushed Mr. Frenchie face first into the mess. Damn the French!

People complain about the bathrooms in France. Any of you tried to use the toilet in Colombia. Gross!

"a flock of starlings" ?? This is classic.

Better hope some of the new PC poopreporters don't get in here and get a whiff of French-bashing.

Nice.

Mouse, archiving is a wonderful thing, and I encourage it...but commenting with just "nice" ??? Pretty lame, don't do it.