My brother has the biggest poops in the world!

YOUR STORY SUCKED!

This is truly one of the funniest stories Ive read so far on Poopreport. Germany? Wow, thats pretty cool. I didn't know they even had "squatting toilets". That must be interesting. I can only imagine what it would look like with your little cousin swinging aorund on t like a bomber plane, wating for the right time to drop its B-Bomb.

Great story-

The Loafster

well i will compliment you on the fact that it was different...but you didn't really include any details on the poop itself

Well, as I said, this was a little guy. He basically did some brown gumballs, as I recall. Four of five. We used to call him The Peanut, he was so small. He did, however, piss quite a bit. That's about it. You had to be there to appreciate the physics of this crap, however. It was more an aerial show than anything else. I assume his brothers did something more substantial into their squat toilets, but I was too busy trying to manuever my little cousin to pay attention to what they did. Peace and Plop!

Oh Brother, this sounds like the Hotel Roosevelt story all over again! I've been in Italy several times and have never seen those types of toilets there. I've seen them in France, but even they didn't have a toilet seat dangling on a trapeze! Sounds like the Big Wiper is using his fertile imagination again. Every branch of his family from grandma and grandpa down and multiple generations before that has taken dumps in bizarre situations in front of each other. What a fucked up family, if any of this ever happened at all!

Link to illustration of an Italian squat toilet is underlined in my article @ 'read about them' and posted by dave. Connects with great tour of the toilets of Italy for those wanting a view of these yawning, gaping devices. Click and enjoy!

when i was delivering my two kids i shit all over myself

Your story was okay, but not the best

that was the lamest story i've ever heard. maybe i'll read it at bedtime to aid me in getting to sleep. i expect more from you, mr wiper.

Tough crowd. Geeze, I thought it was a "solid" story. It was different and I suppose some people just can't appreciate anything that doesn't involve explosive diarrhea.

I guess one of the reason's I appreciated this story so much is it brought back memories of my trip to India two years ago. Most of the toilets that I came across in India were these holes in the floor. It took some getting used to, but being a catcher in softball, I basically used that as my method of crapping on these things. I never took the chance on where to position my pants. I just took them all the way off and hung them up wherever I could.

Of course, as you might imagine, an American spending 6 weeks in India is going to experience Montezuma's Revenge. In fact, the middle four weeks I was there, I didn't have a single solid poop. Try to imagine getting the explosive diarrhea whith your butt perched 2 feet from its intended target. On occasion, I got the projectile diarrhea. That was always interesting and horrifying at the same time. Try to imagine the poo defying gravity, which is exactly what it did sometimes. Intead of letting gravity take its course and falling harmlessly into the hole, it shot clear to the back of the wall and on the floor behind the porcelain hole. That was not a fun cleanup job, especially when I was running low on my precious toilet paper. You see, most people in India don't use TP. They have a small faucet and bucket next to the toilet and...well...you can proabably figure it out. Just remember, never shake an Indian person's left hand.

I never did see any swinging toilet seats in India. I can only imagine the damage I would have done with my projectile diarrhea on one of those.

Yo, Pat! You are so right--those squat toilets are a trip--and Westerners can come off looking like an early Jerry Lewis movie character trying to use them. You know--'The Nutty Professor Takes A Squat.'

BTW, you made me laugh when you made the comment about some people not being able to appreciate a story that didn't have explosive diarrhea in it. Personally, I've found diarrhea to be anything but funny when I've had it over the years (rarely, thank God!)

Perhaps I didn't emphasize the aerial aspects of my cousin's little bombs as they dropped. The Loafster got the images clearly, but perhaps I missed an opportunity to paint more of a 'Bombs Over Tokyo' scenario, which this clearly was. He did, in fact, drop five or six little bombs on Ground Zero, and you should have seen his little face light up each time he did.

Anyhoo, thanks for your 'running commentary' (ha!) on diarrhea abroad, and your support of my story. Peace and Plop!

I don't care what you fags say.....that story sucked

Now accepting turds for the needy. Deposit your donation here.

Interesting... a ring suspended by chains dangling over a crap hole. It's just plain WEIRD. And you're right... overweight people would have tons of trouble with the hole in the ground w/o a seat. I say it's a good story but I don't think I'll be headed to Italy anytime soon.

*scrapping plans to "drop in" on cousin who lives in Italy*

I think the squat toilets are a little odd. Then again, I'm used to the Western ones I have always had, even on the USA base in Germany. I know they get accustomed to squatting, but wouldn't western toilets still be better?

_______
Practicing the ancient Chinese art of double flushing... because sometimes, a single flush just isn't enough.

"Do you want to doo-doo, or not, Billy?" When PR has an eight word story contest, this one will win.

I liked this story. it was amusing. Nothing over dramatic or crazy. Just a funny story about a poop. I'm glad it was brought back out to read.
Good one TBW.

_______
Number One . . . I order you to take a number two.

Nine Inch: the entire family had a good laugh after it was over, and we were packed into the VW bus and on to our next stop, talking about those toilet facilities.

One thing I'd forgotten, however. This story was put up long before the days of comment filtering and rating. Back then, the 'juvenile' commentary that often accompanied Front Page stories was less than memorable and frequently off-putting. Threads were also sometimes peppered with personal attacks.

More than three years later, I'm glad to see mature people appreciating the content of this story. I still get a smile on my face remembering how I and my cousins reacted to that set-up.

Well since Im American, I will and always drop my pants down to my ankles when I poop._______
-Sam aka bknightshadow

Another good one. And you're a sweety to young relatives. Good on ya!