That's fucking hilarious!

Bravo! Encore!!

omg you are sillly bluw poopoo se a docter or somthign !

I left out the best part! The BooBerry turd was so big and thick that I had to cut it up into sections with a wire coat hanger (my mom taught me that trick)! It took about 6 or so flushes to get the entire bastard to go down. I guess it didn't want to leave it's Papa.

that was a great story. Undoubtedly one of my favourites on this site, and a whole lot better than half the crap I've been dishing out. I'd like to know if it is possible to have white poop. What would you need to eat?

I think you might get a whitish poop if you had one of those barium meal things for an Xray exam, it's pretty chalky and white.

Hey Ass Phlegm, you might enjoy this, seeing as you have quite the artistic bent there with all the color experimentation with your poo - try eating a really good meal of beets, you'll think you're shitting coagulated blood...color's that intense. Excess of spinach will give you black shit. Have fun. Add a little corn for texture.

If you'd eaten this blue cereal along with corn, the corn encrusted on this humongous blue turd would've looked fuckin' gorgeous..You wanna try it nex time...

you are my hero. green shits i have had. blue ive only dreamed of.

1) you could also get white poo if you got sick with hepatitis. It disrupts bilirubin (discarded blood pigment from old red blood cells. Under normal circumstances, the liver metabolizes bilirubin (which is yellow) to other chemicals which turn our poo brown. When your liver is ill, it cant do its work, so the umetabolized yellow bilirubin turns your skin yellow and your piss dark brown, and your turds are pale. Run to a doctor and dont even think of drinking alcohol or smoking until you get an OK from the doc.

Ass Phlegm needs to tell us under what circumstances his mom taught him to reduce mega-turds to flusable size. Most moms dont tell us these things.

That was such an enjoyable story. It was very well written with many sentences I could quote over and over due to their descriptivity. I found this site by doing a search on google for "poop". I knew I'd find a wholesome site on the subject.

Thanks for the compliments on my story to everyone. I'm glad to have served the poop community with sometrue tales of my past. Scat Woman, I will try the beets! Sounds awesome! Be sure to look for my next story coming shortly. Just search by my name under the roster. Oh, by the way, I've been droppin' huge turds since I was a small tot. Don't ask what made my mom use a coat hanger to cut it up with. She's sick.

i downed 3 glasses of water full of red food coloring. For...... medical purposes. Later that night, a red poop emerged out of my area. I took a picture, hung it in the local IGA, but not bewfore my girlfriend saw the poop in all it's red glory. She was impressed...

A 3" INCH WIDE, BLUE PIECE OF CRAP!!!!!! THATS JUST AMAZING!!!!!!!

Ass Phlegm...I cannot wait for your next opoos....that coat hanger thing...makes me think of Mommie Dearest....NO MORE WIRE HANGERS...NO MORE UNFLUSHABLE TURDS!! If you like texture in your creations, as well as color, you could try what one of my dogs used to do - every late summer he would wander about under the plum tree and "graze" on the sweet ripe plums which had fallen to the ground, he loved to eat unusual food, unusual for a dog that is...anyway, all that wonderful prune plum fuel would induce the most abundant and prompt evacuations but the poor bugger must have regretted his treat, he was of course not able to spit out the pits and his stool looked like a brown wreath studded with oval plum pits with all these nasty sharp points, must have hurt like a bitch coming out...

Drink heaps and heaps of milk for white turds.

dude that was a funney storie i laghfed like fore like 10 min with my friend karl thats the funneist store since i went to the web site peanis . com the kid that had 3 piss holes and that 3 inch is fucking amizing i like your storie c ya

one time at work i weighed myself myself and it said 196 ponds average for me then i went to the bathroom and took a dump and it was about 10 inches long and 2 inches in diamiter then i weighed myself and i lost 5 pounds!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hi! that was a cool story. i had a blue poop once, i was like 10 and baskin robins had a special "scoop of the month" or sumthin... well it was something like blue rasberry. I ate a bunch, and being a kid i got scared when i had blue diarhea... i wish i took a picture...

I was seek all weekend and 10 minutes ago i just had white poop. i'm gonna go see the doctor sometime this week.

that was disgusting and not very funny.

maybe you should sit and spin on your turd next time.

Can't please everyone!

Light blue Gatorade will turn your poop an electric shade of blue. Sorry, can't remember the flavor right now. It's scary the first time you see blue poop in the bowl.

Gatorade now has *five* blue flavors: going from light to dark, they're Glacier Freeze, Cool Blue Raspberry, Cascade Crash, All-Stars Berry, and Fierce Grape. All of them except the Glacier Freeze, which is *very* light blue, should do the trick.

I'm quite sure that the poop-color changing effect is one reason why blue drinks are so popular (blue Slurpees have been long known for turning poop green or blue). The Fierce Grape has so much blue coloring that I can imagine the product development team asking themselves "how much blue coloring do we have to put in this stuff to make sure that a typical 12-year-old boy who drinks a bottle of it will poop green the next day?"

TRIX gives me Bright Green Shit. Very Bright, and as vivid green as tall fesque after a spring rain.

Holy geez...I had TRIX for breakfast YESTERDAY!!! And I just had a large, green turd TODAY!!! The digestive system is AMAZING!!!!1

did you hear about the guy who ate a lb. of black jellybeans and had neon green crap?

i was scared this morning cause i had "bright ass green" stink pickles so i was looking up green stool on the web thinking it was some sort of medical illness. girardia and salmonella came up as the reasons for green stool. OHH SHIT!, i thought but the next site i saw showed an exerpt from this site and sure enough i was able to diagnose myself from eating a box of TRIX cereal throughout the day yesterday. THANX SO MUCH!!! if youve never noticed that TRIX does this to you it'll freak you out when you see it. (i never noticed it as a kid.) today im going to the store for BOO-BERRY to try out this new found fun. HAPPY POOPING!!

I just googled "Lucky Charms" and this site came up. The reason why I googled it in the first place was because I too had a similar multi-colored number 2 experience. You see, I was on an airplane bathroom, doing my business, and my "you know what" was a pastel green, and I am not kidding at all. Then I realized it was because in the previous 4 days I had been eating a minimum of 2 bowls of Lucky charms per day, with much less milk then usual (It had been at this college conference, and whenver I got a bowl of Lucky Charms at breakfast, the bowls were so small that if I put too much milk in them, it would spill over too easily). Long story short: If you want pastel s***, eat at least 3 cups of Lucky Charms, specifically those with lots and lots of green clovers, and put the bare minimum of milk needed to consume the cereal. Also, don't be on the Atkins diet, since Cereal isn't good for people on it

I always had green shits when I had Boo-Berry. However, I can give all of you a simple recipe for photo-worthy turd glory. BLUE FOOD COLORING, ELBOW MACARONI and CORN KERNELS. Cook the pasta as you normally would, and after straining it in a collander, mix in a lot of Blue Food Coloring. Then add the corn, and eat it with minimum chewing. The results are magnificent!

My wife does not understand this site. I usually end up on the floor in tears and she just stares at me. I'm working on a submission or two worthy of being posted.
This is going into my bookmarks of favorite shit stories.

Ive been eating lucky charms on a consistent basis. And my poopoos have been consistently half green and half brown...its awesome.

Wow! Two kick ass stories in two days. Poop Report is becoming a gem of literary works.

sick dude

That is so cool.
I OD on cereal whenever I smoke pot. Capn'n crunch is what I'll eat two boxes of. But the Captain is already the color of poop, so I never notice.

Did I read correctly that you ate 3 boxes in one sitting? Put the bong down for a second chief!!!

I swear I didnt read the comment above me before posting. Wierd.

ALL I WANNA KNOW IS WHEN IN THE HELL WILL THE MARRIED GUY BE BACK? SINCE HE HAS BEEN GONE THIS SITE HAS GOT BOOOOOOORRRING. WE ARE NOT GETTING A NEW STORY DAILY AND THE ONES WE ARE GETTING ARE OLD AS HELL. I WANT SOME "FRESH SHIT" NO PUN INTENED ..OK OK IT WAS BUT STILL COME ON MAN GET WITH THE PROGRAM. JUST LET ME KNOW WHEN THE REGULAR IS RETURNING BECAUSE THATS WHEN I WILL. GEEEEE THANKS....BYE

OOOOO I FORGOT TO SAY SOMETHING TO SUPER-CRAPPER.If you'd eaten this blue cereal along with corn, the corn encrusted on this humongous blue turd would've looked fuckin' gorgeous..----THAT MADE ME VOMIT AND ALSO MADE ME QUESTION YOUR SEXUALITY I MEEN LOOK AT HOW EXCITED YOU ARE ABOUT ANOTHER MANS FECES..WHAT A PERV..DUHHH....BYE

I don't see why one man saying another man's poop is gorgeous would make you question his sexuality. It's like one little boy congratulating another for producing a giant phlegm wad or pissing their name on the snow in cursive with perfect "pen"manship.
But what do I know...I'm just a girl.

This was so funny. I ate three boxes of cereal like a month ago when I was stoned and the next day i went and took a shit and told my friend. my friend who got stoned with me was like "dude you need to go to the hospital."
We grabbed a ziplock and brought a sample to the doc and he pointed out little crunch berries in there lol! It was nasty and im never showing anyone my stools again.

Good story but I don't understand why you had to stand up. Would that not pinch the loaf?

Wow! I've seen green... but not Blue! I gotta try that! now if only we had awesome cartoons like Wile e cyote (butchered that name) and stuff like that out here! Bloo turds... now thats something worth trying!

its...blue... i dont think thats normal...

...and they both stink.

I thought my apendex had ruptured or something, then I found this site. It was only the blue berry captian crunch that made my poo poo green. Thank you poop report.

I thought I had problems with the black poop from Corn Flakes. Funniest damn thing I turd... I mean heard in a long time. Needed a good hearty laugh today, thanks for the bloo poo story...........

I often overdose on cereal after smoking weed. Cereal is the perfect munchie food, as it is well lubricated with milk and therefor fights dry-mouth. After eating two or three boxes of cereal on a munchie-binge, I often shit straight cereal. Cheerio farts are the most potent.

I'm going to go toke up right now.

You know what's neat? Once I just made a simple banana + soymillk (vanilla) + watermelon smoothie in the blender. Made my turds turn NEON PINK.

Try it.