that's fuckin funny shit man.

I laughed so hard that my colostomy bag began to boil and then suddenly the entire room was splashed with a mixture of bile and corn.

I have wicked bile and corn salsa recipe if anyone would like it.

uh you used to many bad words ;(

What are other names for taking a shit besides "dropping a deuce", "dropping off the kids" and "dropping off the jackson 5"?

Sometimes when a person farts and you just KNOW that it WAS a shit, say "Hey Betty Crocker!! That ShitCake sure is moist !!"

I hate it when I take a shit, and as I turn back to look at it, my shit looks up at me and says "Daddy ?"

Dude, sometimes I give my shits names.

I have so many issues there is no therapy possible or even conceived of and I have my own fucking chapter in the DSM-IV Manual to prove it.

Shitting, vomiting, then jacking off and burping real big is the cloeset you can come to exploding and goddamn it, I love that feeling. Everybody shit. NOW!!! Ahhhhhhh............

lol exept for the bad word issue man

I love to smell the washroom when some dumps!!!

Yeah dude, im there with you. In college we had social hour in the stalls where 4 cubicles were always full and we critiqued each others shit habits. That was fucking the best. Best time was when some fat ass said he shat so big it could not go down and that it was a frequent occurence. We said Bullshit and called that fat fuck a liar. But, he showed us after a mammoth bomb!! Ill be son aof a bitch if that fucker wasnt 4 inches round and a foot long. I fucking dino turd. After that, he left his baby in the toilet for everyone to see after every dump he had. Definitely the shit master.

Hmmm, I've always wondered why guys are late for class.

This is still my favorite story, seeing as I'm in college and love to shit before, during, and after class.

When I was a student, say forty five years ago, the cans were very old fashioned, The partition came back only as far as the rear of the seat and you ould easily see an arse in torment next door. I saw many turds emerge from a variety of smooth and hairy arseholes. One which particularly caused pleasure was that of an African student, whose complexion was like an egg shell. He leant well forward and thrust his arse out and strained against constipation each morning before his classes. It was always an effort for him, but he won in the end. There were glory holes in the wooden dividers and I remember a student colleague in my class who always sat up very strqaight and then wiped forward from between his legs. I wish I were a student at an American university now. How much I would learn about posture and wiping techniques if I had access to open stalls, as so many of them do!

This take top honors for most uses of the word "dude."

When I was in college, one year I stayed in a house with two toilets for 13 asses.

Back in the fall of '81, when I was a freshman in college and was away from home for the first time, I learned to become a shameless shitter in public restrooms for the first time. Prior to that time I would crap at school or in another public place like maybe once or twice a year. Whether it was in a classroom building or in the student union, I learned that I quickly needed to get rid of my inhibitions and just sit down and shit. After walking back to the "safety" of my dorm suite during the first week of school and the private bathroom my roommate and I shared, I quickly adopted the philosophy of most of my new friends.

I was suspicious, however, of why my roommate who had been raised on a farm on the other side of the country, always insisted on taking the handicapped stall when we were out together. She was like 6',3" and tried to explain it away that she just needed more space in the stall. We did most everything together because we were both so far away from our family and friends. Well, I was determined to find out one night when we were at the events arena for a Journey concert. We both joked how we had to crap and she was especially proud of the fact that she was about to expel four days worth of shit. She waited for the handicapped stall while I eliminated my shit within 10 seconds of my butt touching the seat. Finally, I heard her door and saw her purse hit the floor.

I knew she had the loudest pee stream I had ever heard (like water from a hose hitting the bottom of a bucket), but my curiosity about her shitting etiquette had peaked and I needed an answer. First, I heard her tear a little but not a lot of toilet paper off the roll. But then I didn't hear any wiping of the seat and I noticed both of her feet remained planted so close to the inside of the stall door that she could have been kissing it. Then I heard an eruption of 4 or 5 secessive farts and her sighing as an apparent big log came out. What continued to puzzle me was that her feet remained against the door and never moved. I bent down as far as I could from my seated position and could think of no way her shit could be going into the bowl because the toilet was a good 2-feet back from where her feet were. How could this be explained?

I decided it was now or never. Instead of flushing and giving up evidence of my excuse, I quickly pulled up my thong and jeans and gingerly maneuvered my unkempt attire to the front of the stall so I could sneak a peek at what she was doing. She noticed me instantly, so I went ot Plan #2. I told her I had inadvertently forgotten to check for toilet paper and that she had the opportunity to supply the resource I needed to clean myself. She grabbed it, wrapped it around her hand, and opened the door to hand it to me thereby giving me the 2 or 3 second snapshot I had been seeking.

She had one sheet of toilet paper across the front of the seat and only the very end of her ass was seated on the paper. Her knees were positioned almost against the front of the door and while I would not consider that to be comfortable, it worked for her and kept her from seating herself in the more conventional way over the toilet seat. I would think her shit would have come pretty close to skimming the inside of the front of the toilet bowl.

Different? Yes! Shameless? I guess!

Sadie, we need to talk. Is there any foreign intrigue potentially involved here?

Are we to assume that the noisy pee flow was due to the fact that the lady was standing above/squatting over the toilet? Also, I don't see how she would receive any comfort sitting with only an inch or so of her butt on the toilet stool. Comfort is the most important thing to me if you want shit production.