Exuse the pun, but you are full of shit.

c'est rien que de la merde ... but still funny :)

a judge, pilot and an anchorman walk into the same bathroom ....... YOU SIR, ARE COMPLETELY FULL OF SHIT !!!

For your High School graduation your parents sent you to France to see your uncle Judge, who arranged for a two week gorge and orgie? Jeez, all I got was a sweater and new pair of shoes, and I thought we were rich!!

So who shat the most, the fat gorging whores?

Let this be a lesson to you boys, only bring the skinny whores to the orgies, save the food gorges for Super Bowl Sunday when not only does the occasional toilet rise of its bolts but every city sewer system in America backs up at during half time.

And from then on the world knew the phrase "She smelled like a French whore"?

Oh yeah, I forgot to offer advise on the oysters guys. Next time you go to an orgie don't put to much faith in those oysters. I ate a dozen of them once at an orgie and only the first 8 or 9 of them worked!

hello. crappercritic here. this story is a load of codswallop. i think its funny that people sit around, wishing they had funny shit stories, then resort to making up some faked faded shit memories. sad, sad, sad indeed. if you want good stories, that also happen to be real, do what i do.... become a proctologist!

fuckers!

You know, just because YOU will never have feasts with whores doesn't mean that SOMEONE hasn't... "There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy..."

fuckin a people. why do we always end up telling someone theyre full of crap like its a bad thing? grr. anyways, i liked it whether it was fecal fiction or fecal fact. use the fork, luke.

I was power lifting one day. You know just workin' my quads when all of a sudden I felt a massive pain...The unfortunate competitor, who expressed a plea to remain anonymous, remembered to surgeons that he was " stuck" at the bottom of a personal best attempt in the squat lift when he "sort of pulled his stomach in
and pushed extra hard, at the same time as trying to complete the lift." He remembers a loud popping, splattering noise then a fierce stabbing pain and then not being able to move from the squat position. He remained in this position for about half an hour, since trying to stand caused him overwhelming agonizing pain. Para-medics arrived and applied anesthesia on the spot and carried him to an ambulance. He was rushed to surgery, where surgeons described the trauma as an " explosive and aggravated prolapse of the bowel". Meanwhile it was revealed that the weight was removed from his shoulders at the time of the incident by two "spotters" on either side of the lifter. The third spotter who was standing behind the lifter was unfortunately sprayed with fecal matter at the time of the incident. This spotter promptly fainted when he realized the extent of of the injury to the lifter, who was a personal friend. This compounded the task of first aid officers who were at a loss as to how to treat the injury to the lifter in any case, who remained in the squatting position moaning in pain much to the consternation of the helpless audience. The hapless lifter had successful surgery to relieve the prolapse, but remained immobilized with his feet elevated in stirrups for 2 weeks to ensure "internal compliance with the surgery and that the organs retracted successfully". To add insult to injury, the ex-lifter required rectal stitching to partially occlude the anal orifice and stitch the rectal passage( which had significantly expanded and torn during the prolapse) and also was put on a low fiber low residue diet to combat flatulence to avoid any possibility of a recurrence.But I liked it because I am a gay.

Ok, I'm drunk, and I'm reading this story. It's fuckin' bullshit. If I didn't need to be at work in five hours I'd drink another one and read it again just to be sure of it. Mastercrapper, Che, Doniker, Ass Phlegm, these are the masters of the shit story. I would brag about my own stories but I only own two on this site. But these people are the true poop writers of our time. French whores, anchormen, whatever. The only reason your story about shit was published was because you are full of it.

Dave, we need to start a section of FICTIONAL poop stories. That way, I can ignore it and laugh at the truly inhumane stories of people who really have shit themselves to an embarrassing degree. The rest I will skip over. Fuck it, I need another beer.

This story sucked ass.

Oysters and porno, hookers and cake?! LoL. Theoretically, I guess this could happen. I don't know if enough pressure could have built up to literally blow the toilet off it's bolts, but I don't know much about the properties of methane gas either. Picturing a television anchorman making shit bunkers out of newspaper is pretty damn funny though. If this is true, your Great Uncle is one upstanding guy. I'd trade my crazy aunt for him...

To Josh Whitley, I don't know if you are really gay or not, I'm not defending you that way, but, I have been trying to get this friend of mine to send a photo to "PoopReport". He has this photo on his computer (I SAW IT BUT COULDN'T LOOK FOR MORE THAN 2 SECONDS!) of some weight lifter who Blew His Asshole out!! It is the most disgusting photo I have ever seen. I'm describing what looks like a mans butt cheeks and his crack has taken on the shape of brwon, purple and cream (torn fatty tissues) colored cauliflower! I mean it is BAAAD!! No Shit!!!

don't send it! I don't want to see it. Ugh.

I only saw it once and I refuse to see it again. It AINT funny man..AT ALL. But I do want those who don't believe it can happen to know there is photo proof. SHIT HAPPENS! DO YOU BELIEVE BROTHERS AND SISTERS!?

yeah right

It is a sick as shit picture. I have seen som ereal waar wounds man and this is by far the worst thing I have ever seen! Worse than death!

This story is a blatant falsification!!!

The guy who wrote this has definetely seen the french movie "La Grande Bouffe" by Marco Ferreri...

Look at http://www.au-cinema.com/La-Grande-Bouffe.htm for details. I SHIT YOU NOT!!!

el I love ytou

Yuck!

i love a good shit story, true or false, a joke about shit is always funny. keep them coming!!!!

sweet

Well this could very well be true. For my HS graduation, my father took me to Costa Rica for 2 weeks of drinking and sex with very agreeable "putas" who were pre-arranged for about $25 American for the WEEK! But this was in 1978 too....cost of livng and all.

Even if Cagador did plagerize the plot from La Grande Bouffe, it was entertaining. The group of friends in the movie, though, have determined to eat themselves to death, however. Maybe that was after the boy went home.

How a toilet could blow up like that, I a self-plumber, doo not know.

DO the french people regularly have such orgies?

_______
"KOC -- the Cool Crapper" - Rat Droppings

Poop stench aside, your uncle rocks.

True or not, I enjoyed this story.

As for the picture of the guy that blew his has out, I think I'll pass on that picture, the visual that I have is bad enough.
_______
I am winter's hurricane, I am the great blizzard of 1899, and no body shall be exempt from my wrath.

Meh.