You paid $100 for a cab ride yet dont have a car????? wierd..no wonder you got pregnant at 16

It is hard to believe that both cab drivers would risk there licenses by not making those babies sit in car seats.

You said:

"The local police didn't care much about kids not being in car seats, and at the time, neither did I."

This statement shows that you have endangered your child's life before because apparently you were pulled over for not using car seats.
Why a cop wouldn't care shocks me.

You would have really felt bad if you had a car accident and those babies when injured or killed. But then again teenage mother's are usually pretty ignorant...I feel sorry for the baby.

At a mall and running out of diapers? Not one store in that mall sold any? You could have bought some towels to wrap the baby in instead of a plastic jumpsuit. Didn't the mall sell towels?

People, settle down. For all we know this story took place back in the late 60's early 70's when car seats were not a big deal.

The imagery of a little baby in a shopping bag outfit had me chuckling. From the sound of it you're little brother is quite the country Bumkin.

For those wondering why she didn't buy diapers or some clothes for her little brother, maybe she had spent all her money on french friesfor her brother ands just had cab fare left.

This story has a distinct odor of white trash. They wrecked a mall, a restaurant and a taxi because they were too stupid to stay home when they were sick. And knocked up at 16. Way to go! I hope their house didn't have a flat tire when they got home.

Hey Bunga, the first line in the story reads:

"This happened about four years ago, when my daughter and my baby brother were both a year old."

---

Good point about buying diapers at the mall, Frank. She has $100 to give a cab driver but couldn't buy diapers?

What you guys need to do is enjoy the story. If you read it carefully, you would notice that she is from New Brunswick. Things that seem strange and mabey even crazy to you, are the norm there. Funny story Jess, but buckle up those kids eh!

Dude, I spent many years in New Brunswick, and this is NOT normal - so anyone thinking of visiting there, I assure you, it is NOT normal for teenaged white trash skank mothers to haul their sick, diseased and shitting babies around malls and in taxi cabs without thinking "duh, maybe I should buy some diapers. Or better yet, bring my baby home".
The story was fairly well written, but any enjoyment I might have gotten was tainted by the fact that this was the fault of the ignorant mother, and not the baby in question.

Ooops, caught me there doniker.

I'll agree with one of the other posters about things being "a bit different" in New Brunswick, but I'm still proud to be a flatlander.

The stupidity and redneck thought processes portrayed in this story are second only to my hometown...hell...my entire state.

_______
Man who stand on toilet seat is high on pot.

You sure this story didn't take place in New Brunswick,N.J.?I wonder if you could be charged with endangering the welfare of a child by allowing him to commit turd terorism?I feel sorry for the diners at the restaurant.

She didn't have 100 bucks.Her mom paid the 100.

Eoz, I assure you, no one is planning on visiting there.

Jeesh! Tough crowd. I thought the jumpsuit part was hilarious. The visual was great. I am so not supporting the no car seat thing...but none of the malls I go to sell diapers. They do however sell clothes...but that would have killed the story.

People...she said he BILLED her the $100. AND her MOM paid it. If you are going to call her on her actions get your facts right first.

Funny story, Jessica! One more reason I don't want kids. :P

I don't think car seats are primary concerns with 16/17 year olds... she wasn't thinking any differently than most teens, so even though it's wrong, I wouldn't ridicule her for that. (They paid their "doos" for that anyway.)

And maybe I'm the only one but I saw: "Needless to say, I got my mom to pay for it." at the bottom, so she didn't pay the cabbie $100.

"I don't think car seats are primary concerns with 16/17 year olds... she wasn't thinking any differently than most teens"

And this is why teens shouldn't have babies or drive.

------

I know Jessica is taking alot of heat for being so ignorant, but at least she told the story as it really happened.

I took alot of heat years ago when I wrote a poopreport and included that I drank and drove.

I guess we all do stupid shit at times, I just hope Jessica is now making better decisions with her child and life.

This girl should bring the entire family on Springer. This is about as white trash as you can get...mom and daughter both pregnant at the same time? Wonder if her father was the father for both? Anyway, don't know how she had $100 cash on her - must have sold her food stamps.

Oddly enough, I find myself agreeing with doniker on this. I've done stupid stuff. Most people do, including the forces of nature by not heeding their body's warnings.

We are hardwired to accept that toddlers shit in peculiar times and places. If we weren't, the infanticide rate would be much higher. Think about it. How many people could knowingly shit at your restaurant table while you're mid-bite in your meal and still live to see tomorrow? Only the very young, the very old and the obviously mentally deficient. Everybody else dies.

Anyway, I don't believe that you paid for the meal. If the manager didn't just tell you that the meal was on him, I would have given the cashier the dirty diaper and told him/her to keep the change.

CEP Memorial In-Fucking-Sensitive Comment: You can take the trash out of the trailer but you can't take the trailer out of the trash.
_______
Yo quiero Taco Bell.

I'm sensitive godddamn it.

When I was 13, I went snorkling in the Gulf of Mexico near Tarpon Springs, FLA with my dad. It was late in January and being a scrawny kid I was getting chilled from the relatively cool water. I complained about being cold so my dad made me a "wet suit" using a black 30 gallon plastic garbage bag. He cut a hole for my arms and head at the bottom of the bag. I climbed inside with my feet nad flippers sticking out the other end.

It was an amazing MacGyver trick that really worked and I stayed nice and warm. It didn't cross my mind to shit in the bag, but I'm sure that I pissed in it.

Call it the New Brunswick Wet Suit.

Hmmmm I for one thought the plastic jump suit was very ingenious considering they had nothing else to use. Folks once again a lesson can be learned without condemning. If a child has explosive diareah he/she should remain near a steady supply of diapers until the crisis passes. This most likely would be at HOME. Yes she should have also buckled the kid up but if hes going to be crying and whining the hold time maybe it was better he was held and we dont know when this was either so timeline would be important.
_______
The Thunderous Crapper 63 Enjoying home toilet advantage since 2004!

Most cars didn't even have seatbelts until the 60's. Nobody gave a shit about baby seats until the 80's. Strapping your kid in was not the law until the 90's. For fuck sake, Doniker, you stood on the front seat between your mom and dad until you were five years old. They never endangered you. The notion that not strapping your kid into a restraint is akin to attempted murder is social-engineering-busy-body buttfuckery.

You will all make good little communists when the only freedom you have left is the choice to get knocked up before you're out of high-school.

DungDaddy, "Four years ago" was definitely within the carseat law window.

I'm going to have to agree with CEP. When the baby blew through the next-to-last diaper, IT WAS TIME TO GO HOME!

I know it was. But the "law" doesn't mean that it's now a heinous act of negligence to not strap your kid in. The "law" never changed the reality. Doniker is saying that she "endangered" the kid's life. Would he have said that 30 years ago, before some burueacrat did his thinking for him? Horseshit.

"Doniker is saying that she "endangered" the kid's life. Would he have said that 30 years ago, before some burueacrat did his thinking for him?"

Obviously many people were saying this, because it's a law now. Not all laws are in effect to stop us from negligently killing our children, but not strapping your kid in IS endangerment. Children strapped in are much more likely to survive accidents (About 3000 people a DAY die in car crashes, worldwide. There are countless more non-fatal accidents.)
So, yeah. Driving with kid on lap is endangering the kid, just as not safely closing a window that a kid could fall out of, is endangerement.

I also think it was a bit dumb to take a sick baby out, but then again.......I wanna' play devil's advocate!

We kind of sound like the type of people who would watch a movie like The Sandlot and call CPS because the kids got sick on a carnival ride from chewing tobacco.

She's a young mom who didn't give her kid up for adoption or have an abortion. She took her brother along with her and changed his diapers so many times she ran out because she cared enough to change his diapers and didn't leave him in his own shit. She had the sense to at least try to clean him up before taking him home instead of leaving him sitting in his own poop. She has sentence structure that at least passes for tenth grade and the ability to be honest. She attempted to clean up the cab instead of flashing him for Springer beads, drop-kicking him in the junk and then telling him to Go To Oprah.

I would have also rathered she keep a sick child home, but I was 16 once, and it was hard enough staying away from the mall single and childless. Imagine how hard it would be with even less time to yourself. Not everyone starts life off by the manual, you know. I think she'll be OK.

_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

Thanks, Daph, for spoiling it all with your grown-up...talk.

Youth ages; immaturity is outgrown; ignorance can be educated and drunkenness sobered, but stupid lasts forever.
-Aristophanes

Daphne, I concede.

What a crock of shit.

What? The story?

Or that I would concede a point? :)

From the other side of the pond, my slant, of course, is different. I would just like to congratulate Jessica for a story that has sirred up so much interest, and, a lot of it self-righteous, comment!

And it is well written too - I actually managed to read it all, which is unusual!

Hamster (503) -- 09.26.2007 -- wrote: "
From the other side of the pond, my slant, of course, is different."

That's just because your toilets flush the wrong way. Wait, no... that's the equator-effect...

Okay, I'll bite, Hammy. What's your "slant" on this, please?

I really enjoyed the story. Yes there are some details about it which are odd and mildly disturbing but i do not think this site is for judging other's choices but to read funny poop stories.

Jessica, as the old joke goes, "I don't believe I'da told that, sister!"

You ought to have been reported to Child Protective Services for your poor judgment in this situation. Most certainly not funny; sorry.

The plastic jumper was the funniest part. I'll let it at that.
Producing waste since 1967

GGG - simply that I was amused by the reactions to the story! Jessica must deserve some recognition for so successfully winding (nearly) everyone up!!

So, offensive is the definition of a good story?

funny story, but...
yer mom didn't shit...the kid did...and you didn't make the kid shitproof.
you should have paid the bill. or should have split it.

_______
purveyor of the brown note...

Just another example of Britney doing dumb shit.

Dumpster - at no point have I said this was a good story. Whether it is offensive is a matter of opinion, but even if it were, that would not debar it from being funny. A lot of humour would be extremely offensive to many people - think some of the stand up comedians of the 70s and 80s - and even of today. For heavens sake, poop humour itself would be offensive to many.

But, the point I was simply making is that I'm amused by some of the sanctimonious reaction it has stirred up here. Like no-one did stupid or thoughtless things when they were teenagers???

Good God...can you guys just enjoy the damn story without getting so pissy? The person told a funny story. Nothing bad happened, yes she should have used a child seat, but get over it already. The story wasn't about leaving kids out of car seats, it was about a pooping baby. Damn

AC - precisely! Differently put, but the same message!

Interesting to contrast the reaction to this story with the reaction to Jessica's first story, where she got so much sympathy and support after telling us about the poop traumas of her early life.

lmao... thisi is great... oh and by the way in the hussies defence.... the mall usually doesnt have a place that sells diapers... i have never been to a mall with a target or a walgreens or anything in it so she did the best she could with her 6th grade education...

HOnestly I've lived in a few of those small towns in NB (like Bel Isle) and seat belts are not a big deal there ..though they shoudl be ..just scraping out $$ for food is hard enough in those towns ..give the kid a break ..she was hillarious !

I'm sorry. I guess it's my maternal instinct making me into a poop, but I found nothing funny about this story. (Except maybe the plastic baby suit.)

This seems like a story of a flock of self-centered teenagers with no regard for the welfare of poor little Bob. Making him sit in his shit because you thought it was gross. Getting pissed off because he was shitting and obviously feeling sick. Not once did he receive anything to make up for the lost fluids from obvious severe diarrhea. Standing out in the cold with a baby in a plastic bag suit when he is obviously seriously ill.

Would you do the same thing to your "little angel"? I think not. You'd probably get right in a cab and go home rather than trying to enjoy your dinner with a sick child. I'm glad your brother was okay.

_______
Beware the shitticane. Election, 2008.

Obviously yall some ignorant parents, prego teen, prego mom, probly same baby daddy. I feel bad for the baby. He should have been at home and staying hydrated, not going to the mall sick and screaming. He's lucky he didn't end up in the hospital. This poo tale wasn't funny at all, its dissapointing to hear about how a baby was suffering because of people who don't think, but made me grateful I had parents who cared about me and my health.

okay most people on here are just being nice so they can get +2 points or whatever. I am going to lay down the law. okay the girl is 16 and pregnant, she didnt put her kids in carseats, and she dragged her nephew to the mall with the flu. BUT THATS NOT THE STORY HERE!! its called poop report not hicktown report, not young and pregnant report, not flu report!!! if your on this site you should be focused on the poop here. I felt bad for her and i cracked up at the same time. Just the kind of stories i wanna read. I dont pay attention to any of the other stuff because i am here to read about the POOP and thats all! and if you dont agree with me get outta here!