Excellent story as always, TBW! Very interesting. I wonder what would happen when someone had "...foaming at the butt..." and had to stand up. Their uniform trousers would undoubtedly become defiled. This practice gives new meaning to the phrase "pinching a loaf". Pinched off right in the middle, that is!

Texas A&M cadets all go Army when they graduate. This would NEVER happen in the Navy or at the Naval Academy. Anybody who goes Army deserves what they get, including having to pop tall in the middle of a dump.

And that is why I never joined any sort of military or other social activity.

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I poop because I am...I am because I poop.

Good story, glad I'm not in the military.

What happens if an upperclassman was pooping? Would the first year have to stand during the entire time as well?

How long ago was this? My husband graduated from A&M in '98. He told me the administration had to crack down on the freshman hazing after one of the cadets died. If I remember correctly first year cadets were given only a few minutes to eat all of there lunch. One of the cadets didn't realize what he was eating had pecans in it. He had an allergic reaction, ignored it and died. As for hazing in the arm forces. It goes on in EVERY branch.

Ain't it amazing that there are way more assholes than asses?

Oops. I ment armED forces.

Hazing is forbidden in all branches of the military but still happens on the sly. Now it has to be considered "initiation" or "training" and strictly monitored. Crossing the equator used to be fun in the Navy but now they have pussified it to where it is meaningless.

"pussified"
Good word.
Every aspect of institutional life is becoming pussified.

I was at A&M 1984-1989 and knew a number of Corps of Cadets members and had a good idea of what their daily lives were like.

Correction: Not all cadets signed a contract with the armed forces; thus not all cadets were ROTC and so not all had military obligations after graduation. Cadets entered all branches of the military; Corps units are designated Army, Air Force, etc.

At A&M, Corps participation has been voluntary for decades. Participation is mandatory to be in the school marching band or to be in ROTC. Last I knew, A&M graduated more officers for the US Military than any other school except for the service academies.

It is true the various class ranks have improving privileges. Freshmen ("Fish") have least desireable ones, such as must always walk on pavement and during much of week must be in uniform to leave their rooms. Thus urination in room sinks was done at night by all freshmen men at one time or another. Restrictions are relaxed at various times such as finals and weekends. Sophomores were called "pissheads" I think. Seniors were "elephants" or "Zips."

Corps dorms had 2 baths each floor, with numerous thrones and urinals as described, but I forget what the stalls were like. Each dorm room had a sink.

I was wondering what year this visit happened. I had not heard of it. It is possible it was not practiced by all units ("outfits"). I doubt if any of the women's outfits would have done it. The spiel sounds like what I would expect it to.

In Aug/Sept 1984, a freshman cadet ("Fish") died after a late night physical stress session ("crap-out") with his outfit. I remember the night as extremely hot and humid. I recall he had an undiagnosed heart condition. Immediately after, there was a big and heavy crackdown on all hazing and I recall the TX legislature passed a law. There was a marked decrease of "Hazing" on campus, both severity and extent that lasted for years and may continue to this day.

I suspect what the poster described faded out of existence some time ago.

Gig 'Em Aggies! (Obligatory, sorry if offends...)

Texas Aggie and others who asked: this event occurred sometime in 1982, obviously before the unfortunate hazing death described.

Dave-O: I don't know the answer to your question definitively, but it seems plausible that an officer taking a dump would be afforded standing tall status by any underlings present.

I could only imagine that many a freshman has had to change their pants because of this, but it still seems like an 'easy' and safe hazing ritual when you compare it to some of the others.

If hazing really has to happen, I'm fine with stuff like the above. But the moment it crosses the line into dangerous, life-theatening etc. (having to deal directly with shit, piss, extreme heat or cold, amounts of alcohol that'd fell most serious drinkers like a tree, stunts that if not done exactly right could end up causing serious injuries) I think most people here can agree that it needs to stop. The line must be drawn somewhere. Similarly, if you're sending someone through any kind of hazing and they look like they're in medical distress, you'd damn well better stop watching them humiliate themselves and go help.

Great story TBW, at least the stalls covered the privates...until they had to stand at attention.

I`ve done my share of time in army barracks when I was young, but the most open shitter I`ve come across was at a campsite in Baja, Mexico in 1989. 5 pots in a row against a tiled wall: no stalls at all; no seats; bring your own TP; a cardboard box that was passed around for the depositing of said TP.

Made for interesting conversation.

By the way CEP - I`m sure you`re right that this type of hazing doesn`t go on the the navy, you guys enjoy other kinds of initiation rites when you bunk up after a days hard toil below decks with you fellow sailor boys.

A rough night`s sleep with your buddies: Master Bates, Seaman Stains and Roger the Cabin Boy.

Hey Box, Don't feel bad. I'm sure you would have joined the military too if your parents hadn't pressed you into a career in ballet dancing at such an early age.

If someone joins the military they are serving their country.It takes a great deal of courage to go to war.If you don't go to war you make alot of other sacrifices like loss of income or time away from your family.If someone is willing to make the ultimate sacrifice they should at least be given the dignity of taking a shit in peace.

I agree 100%, CC. If someone gives of himself/herself like that, why should they have to give up everything else too? If nothing else, they should get more. Sure, they get paid and they get help paying for everything else, but still, shouldn't they at least get to do what they need to when they need to? Pooping is one of our basic needs, and it should be a basic right for EVERYONE to be able to start and finish a poop in peace.

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"Double the flush, double the fun" --The Amazing Anus

Damn it, why does that ballet dancing keep on coming back to haunt me.

Some parents put their kids in ballet classes to teach them balance, flexibility, etc. I think it's a load of bullshit, but you are welcome to take it however you like.

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"Double the flush, double the fun" --The Amazing Anus

I have read accounts of the navy hazing that takes place when going over the equator. It involves anal rape with a grease gun. I am beginning to see where C. Everett's anal fixation comes from.

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Sir SamDamnit!
The Prince of Poop

I'm sorry, but what does the Equator have to do with it?

It is a random rite of passage. It is supposed to denote a certain amount of sea worthiness and experience. Here is a famous example of the practice, that I picked up on Wikipedia.

"In 1995, a notorious line crossing ceremony took place on an Australian submarine HMAS Onslow. Sailors undergoing the ceremony were physically and verbally abused before being subjected to an act called "sump on the rump", where a dark liquid was daubed over each sailor's anus and genitalia. One sailor was then sexually assaulted with a long stick before all sailors undergoing the ceremony were forced to jump overboard until permitted to climb back aboard the submarine."
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Sir SamDamnit!
The Prince of Poop

Eww. Sorry I asked. I could've lived without knowing THAT.

The practice was also common in the U.S. Navy, but many of the victims were too ashamed to come forward and complain.
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Sir SamDamnit!
The Prince of Poop

I don't see how humiliating a fellow soldier like that would make him comfortable trusting his life in your hands. I have a BIG problem with hazing in general. Regardless of rank, if humiliated like that in the military I would probably attack whomever pulled off the dirty deed. Consequences be damned.

Strange One, I wonder if you did attack back, if you'd conveniently be lost as "Man Overboard!" I wonder how often that has happened; there wouldn't be a body to examine. (*scratches chin thoughtfully*)
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I've come to realize that signatures are irritating.

I think thats a good story, im not getting involved with the issue of hazing. I would say being deprived of taking a much need shit can be really pleasurable. Guys have prostrates so the pressure can be quite arousing for us, girls you wont experience this in the same way.
Two of my buddies over beers admitted to enjoying holding off for as long as possible. through muscle control until the beast is tamed for the time being. So I think that having to stand up and salute a superior taking a long heavy piss while the cadet has 12cm tongue protruding from his constipated ass hole would feel pretty damn good. I wonder why those cadets dont shit while they salute? Is it against the rules to let go in the upright position? Any suggestions? Those of you who have discovered the delights of the standing shit or the half squat shit will appreciate this. Its good if the seat is smeared or if you need to do a urinal, sink or maybe a floor shit if facilities are in use.
More stories about shitting with a military or forces theme please from any guys with experience of shitting in open stalls or witness to a buddy/buddies shitting in the field. Always been impressed and appreciative of toilet blockers and always have my cell phone ready when checking out the restrooms. Incidentally it appears English guys seem to be a nation of flushers... Flush, flush, flushing to rid the evidence, like why the fuck would a guy be too ashamed to proudly accept ownership of the unflushable / toilet blocker...Me, I leave it for the next unsuspecting dude whose been stood outside touching cloth to slip in after me and check his reaction as he get an eyeful of the suprise Ive left him.
Ive hung around and noticed that sometimes, but not always he doesnt flush either - just dumps his load on top of mine - I guess that could be called a chain shit?

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juicyturds
that's quite amusing i would have just dropped the load then saluted

juicy t: I think the consequences of not snapping to and reciting the spiel were demerits of some sort, leading to grunge work, possibly involving extensive latrine duty.

It seems that all basic military training aims to humiliate and take away the individual's personality, so that he becomes part of the crowd. Once that has been achieved, the serviceman is trained in the military arts, be that shooting and abusing Iraqi civilians or flying a B52 bomber. It works, insofar as the sevice men are brave and successful in combat.
Their politicians, who run no risks (except, perhaps, landing on an aircraft carrier with a banner saying "Mission Accomplished") are generally worthless cunts.

If servicemen can get used to shitting in public with no privacy, so be it. In the field, they do not have marble walled crappatoria, so getting used to shitting with your buddies is probably a good idea. All of us might benefit from being shameless shitters.

Great story.

I admire our military, but tose rules are just *ahem* assanine.

I can see saluting one's supperior, but having to keep getting up from the toilet, that's ridiculous. Now I know that I will never join the military.
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Watch out for the deadly F4, though he's been gone since '53, he will be back.

Great story - very visual humour!! And could only happen in the military.

Were I in the army, I would most likely completely ignore any kind of hazing. Consequences be damned - I don't give a damn about rumors being spread about me here or anywhere else. And not only that, but I know Aikido - military training from ROTC or not, an adductive wristlock is an adductive wristlock. :) I'm not quite a pushover.

Hence, in the unlikely event that I ever go to any sort of military academy, I shall proudly fly the banner of Shameless Shitting, hazing be damned! Onwards, proud warriors!