All smokers are revolting shitstains with no regard for anyone else, as I have stated in the forums.

No, really CEP, how DO you feel about smokers?

A few raucous toxic farts would have sorted those 3 assholes out.

CEP, there's nothing wrong with smoking, it's good for you (at least that is what the tabaco companies want us to believe) NOT.

I see lots of smokers that have no regard for other people. I can't be around any cigarette smoke because I get migranes from from the smoke.

I wouldn't care if a person smoked if second hand smoke was not involved. They should either outlaw smoking, or find a way to make the second hand smoke less harmful (like remove the toxic chemicals like benzene and formeldahyde from the cigarettes).
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Watch out for the deadly F4, though he's been gone since '53, he will be back.

Really, who calls it Meggy Dee's?

Over here in Australia it's often called Micky Dee's or Maccas

Really, smoking is a disgusting habit. But very few (if any) of you whining bitches have ever been hurt by huffing a little second-hand smoke. Katy Couric and Hillary Clinton have made you mush-heads think, not only do you have the right to never experience anything unpleasant but a) When smoke is involved, your "rights" supercede the smoker's every time and b) The smoke really will kill you, pussy.

Seriously, if smoke bothers you - or gives you migraine headaches (and I don't think anybody every deserves to have a migraine) - get away from the smoke and stop bawling.

P.S. I don't smoke.

I think that something must be wrong with me when I find a cloudy bathroom to be more disgusting than the lodged log that couldn't find it's way to water!

While I don't hate all smokers, I do feel like carrying around a squirt bottle for those that I do. Much like my cat at home, you scratch the furniture you get the squirt bottle bitch!

I call it McMaggots! I would have let a few juicy ripe farts rip. The fact that they are smoking really would have ground my ass. THIS and THIS alone is grounds for some very destructive TURD terroist activity beginning with massive farts.

I also try to find good hotels to poop in.

ANything else is a shit sty.

McDonalds will do in a emergency but the piss stains feel sticky on your ass

C Everett Poop (337) -- 11.29.2006
All smokers are revolting shitstains with no regard for anyone else, as I have stated in the forums.

Strictly a black and white man, eh? That must be nice. Those pesky shades of gray can be quite distracting. I rarely smoke, but maybe tonight I'll burn one in your honor.

Regards, Revolting Shitstain

This isn't the first time I've seen it called Meggy Dee's on this site. I've only heard it called Micky D's in my experience, except when I call it McShits. Is this some middle America or Chicago weird ass thing?

What's so funny 'bout poop, love, and understanding?

Meggy dee's? Wow. Never again. Micky or die.

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Some are born crappy, some achieve crappiness, and some have crapiness thrusted upon them. (Do NOT be last one)

People that smoke where they shouldn't be should be shot. I smoke, but not in the pressence of non smokers, or people who do not care for it.

Good story though.

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Poop Shooter!

I worked at a convenience store during my college years. Smokers are so finicky too. If you don't have the Kool Filter King double menthol 100's in the soft pack, they go ballistic.

We also call it McFuckers.

Mr Dodger, I am truly a black and white kind of guy. The middle ground is for pansies. Take a stand.

CEP

Your dump saved a man from getting beaten up. Good on you. Your butt hole deserves a medal.
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Sir SamDamnit!
The Emir of Crapistan
Join The Poop Reporter's Lounge

Maybe it should be called McDookies instead?

Actually, ain't CEP a white and white man? As far as the smoking goes, what sort of idiot would rather smoke in a McDonalds washroom than outside, these are the kind of idiots that give smokers a bad name.

If I want my fix of Nicotine, Benzene, Formaldehyde, Hydrogen Cyanide, Carbon Monoxide and other carcinogens you can bet your bottom dollar I don't want to ruin the savory goodness with someone else's shit fumes....that's just nuts!

P.S. Anyone wishing to know how I really feel about C.E.P.'s comments on smoking should click
here.

I'm not a smoker and am glad to see more and more states and cities instituting bans in specific areas. But I've also noticed over the years that many bathrooms smell like smoke because people who won't or can't smoke elsewhere will sneak into the can and light up.

Makes it hard on people who have to go in there and spend a little time doing #2.

If there's any place people should be allowed to smoke, it's a public restroom !! The smell of the smoke helps mask the fetid aroma of the corn-eyed toilet snake. Second hand smoke smells a whole lot better than second hand food !! Especially someone else's !! One's own scent is something to be rather proud of. I am.



Not that I'm sticking up for the smokers, mind you !! I'm just sayin' ..... : P

I did a quick mental inventory of all the people I know or have known that smoke and to my own surprise they were in fact all losers. There lives were ruled by drama and smoking.
Maybe it's coincidental.

Case #1 Cindy: Smoked like a chimney throughout both of her pregnancies. Had a schizophrenic husband whom she loved and would not leave, both children with ADD, childhood diabetes, and asthma. Attendance at her job was terrible.

Case #2 Shawna: Smoked like it was her salvation. She had an abusive boyfriend whom she loved and would not leave. She lost custody of both her kids. Got high in the employee bathroom and got fired for bad attendance.

Case #3 Rose: Spent most of her day smoking and hanging out outside with other smokers. Her and her girlfriend were dealing pot out of there house. Would get piss drunk in the middle of the day and drive back to work and fall asleep in her office.

Well, you get my point. I have plenty more, but this comment is already too long. If you smoke make a real effort to quit. You'll be better for it. If you don't smoke, DON'T START.

There's something about this story that's a a little more offensive and morally wrong than smoking in McDonald's: drinking while driving. A road trip consisting of two friends and a case of beer? That's illegal, for good fucking reasons, too. Funny how everyone focused on the cigarette smoke...

The author says his friends were drunk, but he had been drinking, too.

People ! Smoking, just like drinking, is a very much a matter of personal choice. As long as you don't trouble others with second hand smoke, in my opinion, you're in the clear. And smoking doesn't make you a bad person. Although, I in no way support it.

As a former smoker (quit seven years ago after twenty years, I started young), I can say it is a matter of personal choice.

But drinking and driving will get you busted!

My arse smokes 20 cigars per day so i can't really comment. Mind you , my anus does have a really bad cough at the moment caused my said cigars.

I started smoking as a freshman in high school; how could you not find the bathrooms addictive because they were full of smoke so the non-smokers were a distinct minority. One day I was next in line for a stall when a girl I was acquainted with open the door, saw it was me and offered me a Marboro on which she had taken only a couple of drags. She said she hated to see a good smoke go to waste as she was securing her jeans and flung her purse over her shoulder.

Because this was before school and my business class teacher was always late (we could smell the smoke on her and knew she was right out of the faculty lounge where they could smoke back then) so I figured I had a few minutes.

I fumbled in trying to pull my jeans down with my right hand as I held the cigarette in my left. Then I switched it to my right hand and had only marginal success. My mornng shit was coming and this was becoming too troublesome. Finally, I made the brilliant decision to place the cigarette on the seat temporarily while the ashes would fall onto the floor. It worked! By using both hands to get my jeans unbottoned and unzipped, I was able to pick up my smoke, sit down for my shit, and get a few drags in on what one of my teachers used as a regular slam against smokers--calling them "coffin nails".

Perhaps it was my frustration with my uncooperative jeans, the rather cold seat (I surmised that I was only the second occupant of the day)but while I was somewhat straining myself to get action and taking the occasional drag on the cigarette (and then flicking the ashes and largely hiding it near the water level at the front of the bowl in case our dean of women or a teacher would peak in), I started to smell a different kind of smoke coming up from the opening on the front of the seat and accumulating in my dropped jeans and underwear. I stamped my cigarette out with my foot, jumped up immediately and found ashes had ignited some loose toilet paper in the stool but out of the water at the fornt of the bowl. Since the previous user had not flushed, and probably had used the toilet paper as a seat liner), my flicked ashes had ignited it. I flushed the fire immediately.
The two-minute warning bell rang and I was the only girl left in the restroom. Not wanting to be associated with the smoke, I moved about six stalls down where I took my crap in record time. Whether it was my nervousness (I was still shaking from fear when I was sitting on the seat) or the desire of the load not to keep me tardy from class, it was one of the fastest-coming shits I can remember. And I still beat my teacher to class!

I tend to like the smokers like Marlena even though I've never smoked. Outside of the problem that she had with the toilet paper catching fire though is one very important point--the smokers are among the most ALERT restroom users and they are great to follow in a stall because they are in a hurry and they don't want to get caught smoking. Therefore, they are going to be doing their thing (pee or shit and take a few drags of a cigarette) FAST so that they don't draw too much attention to themselves and so they won't get caught.

So many times at my high school where I'm a senior I waited and waited and waited for a stall to open only to peek in and find a girl sitting on the toilet reading a novel, or on a couple of occasions brushing her hair while she waits for her stool to come. When I wait in line I want to be assured that the person I'll be replacing in the stall is indeed in the PROCESS of peeing or crapping and not just trying (often in vain, I swear!) to get the process started. When I see smoke that means she's awake and probably ready to vacate. That's music to my ears--as well as my bladder and anus. I take some smoke and even butts in the bowl or on the floor anyday when I can save two or three minutes by getting in and out fast.

Unlike the girls that are leisurely killing time, the smokers seem to always be on the lookout and the move. Vital time is saved following the smoke they leave, and I might add, I don't get detentions for being late. Smokers, you rock!

Same thing happens in men's restrooms. Not as much nowadays because of indoor smoking bans, but it's been my experience in the past that guys going into the bathroom to smoke usually go in, smoke, and are out rather quickly, wheras some non-smokers will sometimes enter a stall and basically camp out for a long time. There have been times when I've been at malls where I actually had to have someone from security go in and check on someone after 30 minutes or so. On one occasion I headed into a restroom, noticed the wheelchair-accessable stall was occupied, and heading back out to wait- and wait, and wait, and then asking security to please figure out what was going on. After a few minutes the security guard escorted the person out, who a)looked pissed that someone dared to bother him in a public restroom and b)was carrying two shopping bags and way more reading material than one needs in the bathroom- looked like a couple of magazines along with that day's newspaper.

of course, being an actual wheelchair user doesn't make one immune to being on the other end of something like that: not too long ago I was at a local restaraunt and withing a couple of minutes of entering the restroom stall, some old guy was knocking on the door expecting me to leave, going as far as telling me he was about to have an accident due to me taking too long. I can only move so fast, but that didn't matter. The important thing was that I complied with his order to clear out- why? Because it was drilled into me early on that even when a disabled person is using something meant for disabled persons it doesn't necessilary mean it's legitimate use, and that the correct thing to do is step aside out of respect for other people because everyone else always needs it- in this case, I was in this old guy's way.
In the city I live in we have a huge number of old people who think that all things for disabled persons actually belong to them *over* the needs of disabled persons, and I always have a guilty conscience over all the times I've gotten dirty looks for "misusing" something.

I'm 16 years old, have never smoked, and mark my words, I will never smoke! My dad smoked until I was 10 and it drove me up a wall. Now he has to check his blood pressure every day. (I don't know if this was caused by his smoking or not, but either way it worries me.)
Don't smoke, people. It can really mess up your family, especially if you have kids. Imagine how confusing it is for them to get lectures in school about how bad smoking is, only to come home to a parent who smokes. I was in that situation and man was it bad...

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...and they all lived crappily ever after!

DungDaddy (861) -- 11.29.2006
Really, smoking is a disgusting habit. But very few (if any) of you whining bitches have ever been hurt by huffing a little second-hand smoke. Katy Couric and Hillary Clinton have made you mush-heads think, not only do you have the right to never experience anything unpleasant but a) When smoke is involved, your "rights" supercede the smoker's every time and b) The smoke really will kill you, pussy.

P.S. I don't smoke.

I should not have to worry about second hand smoke. Smoking is what lead to my father having a heart attack, and eventually his death. My mother smoked for 54 years, and now has COPD, emphyzema, CHF, and cardio myopathy.

Befor Massachusetts banned smoking in public facilities, I had to be careful of where I went. As a teenager, I had asthma, but out grew it.

In a nutshell. If someone wants to kill themselves with cigarettes, that's fine. But my health should not have to be compromised because of somebody's habit.

People are going to smoke, but the tobaco companies should be forced to make safer cigarettes.

People smoke for the nicotine, and flavor. Cigarettes don't need tar, benzene, formeldahyde, and the slew of other toxins in them.
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"If December be changeable and mild, the whole winter will remain a child."

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't formaldehyde the chemical used to preserve specimens used for dissection is science classrooms? (I forget if that's the one, but I know that same stuff is one of the ingredients in cigarettes.) Really, who wants to make their lungs like a preserved frog? Disgusting!
Incidentally, the type of alcohol used in alcoholic beverages just happens to be ethanol, the same kind of alcohol found in gasoline. Think about that next time you drink to excess (or at all).

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...and they all lived crappily ever after!

What the heck is Meggy Dees? I had no idea until the last paragraph. Who calls it that???

Drinking and driving is for shitty ass fuckheads-- I hope some smoke went up your ass while you were taking a dump and killed some of your brain cells.
The Queen has spoken.

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Don't be playin' with the Queen of Sharts

Formaldehyde is a carcinogen.Just one of many in tobacco products. So, do heavy smokers need less embalming fluid? I thought a bio. teacher told my it's not used any more(for perserving specimens). Back to the poop: nice job.

I smoke occasionally off school grounds, but like Leigh and Marlena, I see advantages to following the smokers into the stalls. While I don't smoke at school (my mom would kill me if she knew I smoked), I admire the fact that they are both alert and successfully sneaky. I did, however, have one bad experience this past spring when I followed a smoker in using a stall at my high school. It was about 10 a.m. and I had been holding a large shit since just before school when I went into two separate restrooms and there was a line for each stall. Jan, an acquaintance of mine, had peed and snuck a few drags in. I always thought she was so cool about spreading her legs wide while sitting on the seat to look like she was shitting, even though many times she had a cigarette at seat level near the front that she could easily flick out and drop into the bowl if a teacher or administrator came through. She got done and brushed by me as she left the stall. There were about four minutes left in our eight minute passing period and I had to make the best of them since I had been holding and was ready to deliver one big shit. Although I don't wear a dress every day, it was easy for me to pull my dress up, slide my panties down and place myself on the seat. My stool was coming out fast within two or three seconds of my butt touching the seat, but I also had a sharp pain on the bottom of my left thigh right toward the front of the seat. Once I had fully passed my bowlfull the burning pain seemed to intensify on the bottom of my left thigh. I slid forward on the seat to examine my contribution in the bowl and in doing so, I also noticed that there was a burn sore on my left butt, some ashes that were still hot when I sat in them, and also a sizeable tan burn mark on the white toilet seat. I stood and brushed the ashes off my butt as well as the seat and was troubled my the lingering soreness on my butt as I wiped, pulled up my panties, and vacated the stall. I saw Jan in the bathroom several times after that, often I was the next to use the stool, but I made sure I wiped the seat with toilet paper first before sitting down. It's been several months but I still have a scar of sorts. While the smokers are great in using and vacating the stalls fast, I learned that they don't fully clean up after themselves. Therefore, watch what you're sitting in.

I would guess that the average "sit down" time at a McD's would be about 5-10 minutes. Had this been a fancy, multi-course meal and the outside temp was -30 I might understand the use of the bathroom. However, if you cant finish a fast food meal without a smoke, you have a problem. Also dont mess with the fast food "pussies". They can more than get even with you.

I hate smoking. they should take all the poop we poop out and put it in ciggys

Stopped reading this story when we got to the "I can piss anywhere" speech, again, and the part about drinking and driving. Sorry, DND, I do NOT like most of your stories for this very reason.

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Born right the first time.