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oxypowder

How I Stopped Drinking And Learned To Love PoopReport

Posted 09.30.2008 by Daniel J (10)
TO: Dave from PoopReport
FROM: Daniel
SUBJECT: Dr. Adams
-----------------

Hi Dave,

What happened to Dr. Adams? I saw on this page the phrase "the late Dr. Adams"?!?

Dr. Adams' article about alcohol caused me to stop drinking (happily) after fifty years of alcohol use. That was in May 2008. I will never drink alcohol again.

Now I've returned to the site to send his column to a friend and I see him referred to as "the late" Dr. Adams.

The man may have added healthy years to my life with his straightforward comments and information about alcohol's poisonous effects on the human body.

So I am just curious: when did we lose him?



TO: Daniel
FROM: Dave from PoopReport
SUBJECT: re: Dr. Adams
-----------------

That's kind of an inside joke. He isn't dead. He just disappeared from the site for a few years. When we found someone to take over for him, we added "late" because he's dead to us :)

Tell me more about how Dr. Adams made you stop drinking! That's incredible!



TO: Dave from PoopReport
FROM: Daniel
SUBJECT: re: Dr. Adams
-----------------

Hello Dave,

Since you asked, here's how and why I quit drinking alcohol.

It was a Sunday afternoon in May, 2008. I was in a discussion with my son over the history of toilet paper. I went to Google to search for "use corn cobs to wipe my butt". PoopReport.com came up with a topical article, proving my son correct once again. Someday I WILL catch him making shit up!

At the conclusion of our discussion, I returned to PoopReport and saw the link to Dr. Adams' article on alcohol.

I was amazed! I had NO IDEA that alcohol was a poison to the human body! I have been drinking that crap since I was five years old! I am now fifty-five. I read the WHOLE page and at the end I was so curious about this new information that I went back to Google and searched about alcohol's effects on the GI tract. That search brought up this article.

That graphic web page closed the deal. I had just finished off my current bottle of Tanqueray the evening prior. I was about to go get another bottle. I decided right then that I would NEVER put alcohol into my body again. Ever.

It was very easy to stop drinking motor fuel once I found out that alcohol is ethanol and that ethanol is the poison in every alcoholic beverage: wine, beer, spirits, cordials, sake, etc.

What rang true for me was the info about the "beer shits". I have had morning diarrhea most of my life. I blamed everything -- but I didn't know it was the alcohol! Needless to say, I now have fine, healthy, and very satisfying poops, and twice per day at that! Also, I have not had a headache since May.

My ethanol-consuming friends mostly refuse to accept that alcohol is poison. But, so what! I don't order the martini with dinner. I drink water. I don't even see any big deal about being drunk -- people usually don't drink enough to become funny and entertaining anyway. Mostly they just drink enough to become annoying.

AND -- I will NEVER get a DUI :)

So the moral of this story is: you NEVER KNOW what good will come from a random idea or conversation. And no, I have not replaced alcohol with another drug. I like me just as I am. Natural. It's been like starting a whole new life!



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DungDaddy (1386) -- 09.30.2008

Dave, how many lives has PoopReport saved now?

Logjam (2460) -- 09.30.2008

I don't know about the rest of you, but when I read about how PoopReport has changed someone's life for the better, I have a strong urge to purge.

daphne (3695) -- 09.30.2008

"My ethanol-consuming friends mostly refuse to accept that alcohol is poison."

"Also, I have not had a headache since May. "

Daniel, if you have headaches from drinking, you were drinking too much. It doesn't mean that one martini at dinner is a poison, nor should you tell you friends they're drinking poison if they chose to responsibly imbibe. Many cultures drink wine as part of their daily lives and have wonderful digestive health/blood pressure. I hope that you can make peace with that fact. Best wishes to you.


_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

CC (not verified) -- 09.30.2008

Daphne,This Bud's for you!My doctor told me that I should get more rest and hydrate my body.I drank until I passed out.I read that drinking was bad for you so I stopped reading.

ChiliKahKah (92) -- 10.01.2008

Each must decide on their own what to consume. I drink far too many diet sodas. I am sure if I took the time to read about the chemical composition of that stuff that I'd poop my pants.

daphne (3695) -- 10.01.2008

Well then Chili, that sounds like a Poopreport waiting to happen...... :)

You kill me, CC! And a Bud back at you.


_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

Doody howitzer (not verified) -- 10.01.2008

Nothin better than sittin around a fire and drinkin sum beer with a few friends. Ah happy times....

The Thunderous ... (710) -- 10.01.2008

Wow very inspirational and see now you have good healthy shits too. God bless you and this website another life saved because of poop.
_______
The Thunderous Crapper 63 Enjoying home toilet advantage since 2004!

ChiefThunderbutt (944) -- 10.01.2008

Good for you Daniel, if you are happy with your decision that is all that counts. I however plan to continue my imbibing.

To much of anything can be detrimental to your health but I think it is worth pointing out that men who drink suffer
half the death-rate from heart attacks as men who do not drink. I have been drinking on practically a daily basis for over fifty years and do have a few minor health problems but they are not alcohol related.

_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

pnuttycorn (269) -- 10.01.2008

I like to drink too! Sometimes I go overboard but better that than smoking crack right? RIGHT?
Minimalizing helps me justify ok?

Aromageddon (14) -- 10.08.2008

In those oh so wonderful Diet drinks is Aspartame. I cant remember exactly which it is, but in either your stomach or your liver, it turns into Formeldahyde (you all know what i mean), Though it is brief, the fact its embalming fluids bothers me. Sure made me stop drinking diet rather quickly!


_______
beans beans the magical fruit....

LeandraCullen (400) -- 10.19.2008

With the medical posts, i seriously wonder how many people's lives where changed by this site...
_______
I will never shit somewhere that only has that horrible, scratchy brand of toilet paper. That stuff sucks!

La Petomaine (85) -- 11.15.2008

Poop Report helped me to become a more Shameless Shitter. Which may have saved my colon some trouble. I thank them!

_______
Have a crappy day!
La Petomaine

sittingpretty (281) -- 11.15.2008

It remains to be seen if I will be saved butt I dooh enjoy the poop stories, jokes, songs, poems, comments. The poop and fart wisdom of the world is right here on PoopReport. I have been hungry for artichokes ever since Daphne said it helps gas. PoopReport is my medicine, my therapy, my entertainment, my friend.
_______
...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

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