I would have gotten a gun, shot them both, and buried their bodies where they would never be found. Seriously.

My mother has told me that as toddlers, my brother and I had also played with and eaten our own shit.

Thankfully I have no recollection of these events.

I do remember often having to pee in the middle of the night and being too lazy to get up so I would roll to the side of the bed and piss on the floor between the bed and wall.....

I never, ever want kids.

That was nasty, yet funny, but I have to say that the nastiest part was when the girl said she knowingly licked the shit off of her fingers. I would have vomitted severly at that point and then would have to punish her severly for being so stupid.

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I poop because I am...I am because I poop.

OMG :(~~~~~~ @ I would have puked. My daughter had explosions out of the diaper but nothing like this. I guess this is what you call really shitty kids huh?

Disgusting, but funny. If she enjoyed the taste so much you should have made her lick the walls and carpet clean as a punishment.

I don't know who can help you.I dare you to contact Dr.Phil.You probably have a better chance of getting on Jerry Springer.

How old was your daughter?

Most of us think that our aversion to poop is instinctual. But, as this story shows, many young kids don't find poop gross at all. Fecal aversion -- for your own poop, at least -- is something children are taught by society, usually during potty training. It's hard to believe that something that invokes such a visceral response is learned and not automatic, but this story backs this up.

Glad you guys like my story. My daughter was almost two at the time and my son was almost three. Though there have been a few more messes, none were on the same scale and she never ate shit again. At least as far as I know...

She has a real shit eating grin.

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I poop therefore i am.

At least when she grows up she can be sure Japan has a job lined up for her if she wants it.

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I poop therefore i am.

"She has a real shit eating grin."

haha....i can't believe I didn't make this comment...my father has been saying "shit eating grin" all my life!!

And to the other mean comments; kids will be kids...don't be so hard on them. I woundn't punish my kid if she did this...and thankfully she never did.

I've been told to eat shit and die, but I must say that eating shit and living sounds way worse. How long did the bad breath last? Also, this is why you should never eat your young - who knows what THEY'VE been eating.

Wow. This is the first story to actually make my stomach turn. I almost hoiked, I really did. And when you're pregnant, that vomit reflex seems likes it's on overdrive, so I don't know how you held it in! Congrats to you for not running screaming out of the house!

Wow. Just..yeah...wow. I feel sorry for your kids in the next five or ten years. Oh, the embarassment they'll come to know.
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Yes, those are my brown spots. Yes, those are your walls.

To me, there is nothing cute or funny about this story. Best case, these kids are retards and should be institutionalized. Even baby spider monkeys wouldn't smear shit all over themselves and they are the stupidest primates. Worst case, these kids are future degenerate perverts in training. Next they will be pulling the head off the class hamster and then they will be caught with a freezer full of human body parts like that Dahmer idiot. If they are lucky, they will end up somewhere in the middle, like Doniker.

Thank God (or Buddha or Allah) for vasectomies.

CEP...you are totally overreacting.

I don't see anything abnormal about what these children did.

And save your reply of "Of course you don't doniker because you are as demented as them".

Nothing abnormal about smearing shit all over your self, your sibling, the house and then licking it???????????????????????

Let's take a poll and see how many poop reporters have ever even come close to anything like that. My guess is that it will be these 2 kids and Doniker.

I hope they have nice cellmates at least.....

This is certainly abnormal behaviour. The last time I heard of people smearing their own shit around the walls was in a jail holding IRA murdering scumbags who were on a "dirty protest". They should have been made to lick the walls clean, then taken out and shot. But instead of that, only a year or two ago our pathetic leader let the whole lot go free.

if these were adults or even a child over age 5 I would call this behaviour abnormal but I am under the impression that these are young toddlers...are they not?

When I ate and played with my shit I was about 2 years old...and I have never had the urge to do it again.

Saying that these children should be shot or institutionalized is ridiculous.

Reading this story and the comments make me want to get shit faced. But I have a 2 yr old and a 6 month old at home so I'm shit out of luck. I hope my children dont pull the same shit yours did. If they did the shit would hit the fan.

This really reinforces the term "terrible two's".

You say you will use the story as ammo when they are older, especially for when they are both dating. I bet you regret not taking a photo of them both smiling at the camara with shit all over themselves, the walls in the background and you daughters teeth. If her future boyfriend knew that I doubt she would get kissed in a LONG while.

Why not keep the door closed and do NO cleanup; then use the room for punishing those shits. After a few years they might get smart.

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Believe in the joy of shitting!

Yet another reason why I'd rather have a cat than kids. At least if a cat doesn't use the litter box, cat poop is dry and leaves little or no mess behind.

I would have scrubbed the kids clean, made them clean the bathroom, then break out the industrial cleaners and the carpet steamer after shipping the kids off to Grandma's for the week(month?).

And I would most definitely embarrass them with this story any chance I got.

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"Double the flush, double the fun" --The Amazing Anus

Interesting doniker - you remember "playing with and eating you own shit" when you were 2 years old. And now you don`t have the urge to do it again.

You have an amazing memory, I can`t remember anything before about 4 years old. And I know I didn`t eat my own stools.

So you`ve lost the urge now, but what was the fascination then - the flavour, the texture, or maybe it was better than the other crap you were being fed by your parents: we need to know.

I would have done one of those silent horror screams and then spanked the rest of the shit out of them. OMG that soooo gross! Congrats on keeping your calm.

Very young children have a natural inclination to explore things in their environments in order to learn. Alot of this early exploration includes putting non-food items in their mouths. Most of the time this is harmless activity, but there are obviously dangers involved such as the risk of choking and possible poisoning, which is why children require adult supervision.

In some cases, children can develop an eating disorder known as "Pica", characterized by the persistant eating and craving of non-food items. Some of the more common preferences of Pica sufferers include cigarette butts, dirt, laundry detergent, and feces.

For more information on Pica, go here.

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Always looking out for number two!

I can't believe I'm typing this but in defense of doniker he never said he remembered eating his own waste, only that his mother told him he did when he was a wee toddler. Doniker, have you ever wondered if your really poor self esteem is because of this? Maybe your Mom was just messing with your head, you may actually have never worn a shit eating grin...(this concludes my Dr. Phil segment)

You`re right Bunga - apologies doniker, I`d forgotten your first post.

However doniker- you seem to be unusually defensive of this story. Not your normal self. Is there something you`re hiding.

As usual I get made fun of for opening up.

I was defending these children and was against all the negative comments....

...fuck, why am I even bothering?

Maybe I am being a little too touchy here guys but I really didn't like some of the comments made about my kids. It was gross that my kids had playtime with their poop, but I think having them "institutionalized" is taking it too far. Remember they were only almost three and two. It's a funny and gross story, like all stories about poop are. And yes I do wish I had taken a picture :)

what a bunch of fucking loosers!!!i would fucking dare you to ever say any thing about my kids or any other kids tom my face.you wouldn't fucking have the nerve ya bunch of dirt lovin'loosers.potential serial killers,jerry springer material?i make six figures,i would ask someone the same question who posts negative comments about children on a website that that brings humor to the most grotesque bodily function.

If you make six figures, maybe you can afford a class on spelling and punctuation at the local community college, assbreath.

According to Gerard Keegan's Psychology Site, "Anal stage: (1-2 years). The second stage of personality development, where according to Freud, libido moves to our anus, or bottom. The anal stage is all about how strictly or liberally we were toilet trained, at a time we get pleasure from playing with our bowel movements. (I know it sounds ridiculous, but please read on!). An overly strict toilet training regime can give rise to an anal retentive personality. This is the adult who is obsessively neat, tidy, and organised. They can be stubborn and tight-fisted with their cash and possessions. (emphasis GGG's) This is all related to pleasure got from holding on to their faeces when toddlers, and their mum's then insisting that they get rid of it by placing them on the potty until they perform! Not as daft as it sounds. The anal expulsive, on the other hand, underwent a liberal toilet-training regime during the anal stage. In adulthood the anal expulsive is the person who wants to share things with you. They like giving things away. (emphasis GGG's, again) In essence they are 'sharing their s**t'!"

How do Poop Reporters align to this theory?

Just about every child I've ever known has reached into their diaper and played with their poop. They will smoosh it, smear it, "patty cake" it and sometimes taste it. My own nephew rubbed his own offerings all over his head when he was two or three. I can only guess that he was imitating us washing his hair.

The OP's children are not at all out of the ordinary. I'm surprised the little gal went back for seconds. I assume that poo isn't very tasty!

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Hello. I'm Johnny Splash.

I would have gotten a gun, shot them both, and buried their bodies where they would never be found. Seriously.

SERIOUSLY I WOULD HAVE ALSO!!!

Nasty story, not really funny but still entertaining. And C everett Poop, just take a deep breath,

That is nasty. I've been blessed not to have children that play with their poop *knock on wood*. My youngest is still in diapers, but so far, he's been very uninterested in what goes on his diaper. He pokes the front of it sometimes, but that's just because all males are obsessed with their penis.

My older cousin's mom told me that when she was about 2 she had pooped in her diaper and pulled it off. in her poop was corn [[that she had with dinner the night before]] and she decided she was hungry and picked all the corn out of her shit and ate it..

You know I'm still feeling kind of bad about the treatment doniker got for trying to stick up for those kids. His well meaning but misguided post was from the heart. Maybe what we could do is start a little support group like Jerry Lewis does for Muscular Dystrophy, except of course we'd have doniker and all those cute little brown toothed kids sitting round him. We'd need a catchy marketable name, I thought donikers darlings was good but maybe someone can come up with something better. Remember, it's for the children.

This is the funniest story yet. And most of the comments add to the entertainment.

Alright first things first, CEP you can't tell me that this is the first time that you have ever herd about kids doing this... if it is then WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? My kids aren't the only kids to do this sort of thing. And that also goes out to every other person that is bad mouthing these and any other kids that have or will do this. Plus if you are going to be registered on a site that talks about shit stories WHAT DO YOU EXPECT? How about growing up and get a life and stop bad mouthing kids behind their backs. You are an adult right not 5 years old. So why don't you leave my kids alone and go back to the porcelain throne you crawled out of.

Your kids? I thought you were the aunt. Just wondering. Oh, and by the way, even though I thought CEP's comment was over the top, I would still defend to the death his right to say it, as well as your right to say whatever you want, too. This is STILL America, after all.

Amen, GGG.

I was just browsing the internet b/c my almost 2 yr old son just started playing with his poop and eating it and I wanted to know what to do about it. He hasn't smeared the walls yet but he does like to "wash" his hands with it and seems to put it in his mouth since the evidence is smeared all over his face, although I haven't seen him actually eating it. Lucky for me, as my vomit would be painting the walls! This does happen and I absolutely believe this story is true. One thing I did find that helped was to put him in a onesie (full body suit that snaps at the bottom in between the legs) and that way he can't get into his diaper very easily. This has worked so far. I am sure other mothers may stumble across this and it may help them as well. :0)

Here's what I don't get: I have a perfectly housetrained dog that NEVER craps in the house and yet most apartment complexes wouldn't rent to us because of the danger of a doggie "accident" wrecking the carpet. Because of that, we put a pet deposit down for the dog to be sure she wouldn't mess up the carpet. Why don't landlords request deposits for kids? Sounds like these kids did more damage than my dog could ever do.

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An apple a day keeps the ExLax away!

I personally would punished the kids by making them help me to clean up their mess.

Kids do crazzy thing sometimes but, that is just gross.

By the way, great first story.
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It's not nice to fool mother nature.

This is story is pretty sickening, yet hilarious. It is true that toddlers are attracted to their own poop. When my cousin was little, my aunt found her sitting naked, on the floor, playing with her poop as if it was clay. And I have to say, her sculptures were pretty good! No wonder she grew up to be an artist!:)

I'm begining to dislike CEP. He is much too violent. How can be so hard on a kid who tasted shit when that's all that comes out of his mouth?

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Sharp Shitter-Signing off

This story was too funny. Great visuals!!!
Producing waste since 1967