Ouch...

My mother has a disease and so she has constant constipation, or abdominal pain. It effects her knees so she has a hard time standing in the closet that she calls a bathroom. Its truly a hell fo her, and trust me, she's young to have to go through that. :/

This past winter I fell on my ass on some ice and couldn't move for a day and was sore for four more. (And I couldn't stay home from work either.) Crapping was difficult - I injured my right asscheek and that's the one I reach my arm under to wipe. It sucked. Not being able to walk 10 feet from the couch to the bathroom didn't help either.

Doniker - doesn't your workplace have a short-term disability plan?

I have sciatica too but it only flares up after I get 10 pounds or more overweight. You are lucky you are a stander, the sit and twist to wipe KILLS the back during a sciatica bout. Those are the times I wish for a bidet!

Doniker, you have my complete sympathy. That is obviously something that no one should have to endure. I agree with you, I would not want to waste vacation time on that stupid therapy bullshit. I'm lucky to have never been very sick before, and your story makes me appreciate my good health even more. I hope you feel better soon.

Doinker, why not just get a dog......

sorry I meant Doniker

Sciatica sounds bad. I have lower back pain once in awhile but no sciatica. My first question was "how old are you" but you answered that in the end. 39 seems young to have that kind of problem. I can sympathize with you

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I stand too.

Everyone thinks its insane, but I swear, thats how I was taught. My mom and my sis do it too.

show me some poop pithurs

hey where did poopypattywomen go did dave delete her i am so sad now we were like g/frands together geez im am so sad.

Man, I could deal with the pain, but anything that interferes with taking a healthy dump is just not cool.

sucks to be you

OH I here you. Am currently dealing with the same thing. I start physical therapy next week.

I just have to chime in that Bending is HELL. Reaching is worse! And I so hear you about the multiple wipes...

You have my sympathy and true condolences, but I am verily glad to see I am not alone.

*smacking forehead*

here=hear

*sigh*

I too suffer from this condition and like my friend above I begin a physical therapy next week, in fact I went for my initial evaluation today. Two weeks ago I ended up in the emergency room! I pulled up in front, inched my way out of the car and called for someone to go get me a fucking wheel chair!! I had had enough moaning and groaning and hobblin and inchin my way along. They gave me three shots in my low back (don't ask what it was cause I didn't give a fuck, it put me to sleep for nearly 3 days).

Next week they are going to start a very intense deep tissue massage on some weird tendons in my stomach, hips and the backs of my thighs, down low like at your appendix, both sides, deep massage until it fucking hurts!! They gave me a taste of it today and honestly I am a little scared of the pain. But I hope to get some releif too! Ass wiing when flared up? OUT of the question. I even had to have my old lady do it for me a couple of times. She is a real trooper man!

Well I rode sciatica out without medication or theraphy and after 5 or 6 painful weeks I am 100% pain free.

Of course I am cautious of my every movement...it's only a matter of time before I move the wrong way and spend months in agonizing pain.

My Grandma has a Nerve problem and i was wondering if u guys have any cures besides advil and the heat pad...

Lie down, then stick your legs up together, stretch, and try and flex your ass. I used to have sciticia and i did that and it stopped it.

thanks Chris. I have been painless for months and alot of daily stretching was a big part of my recovery.

When I was a college distance runner, we would use moist heat for muscle rehabilitation. Take a towel, dampen it and put in a microwave. Heat to where towel is warm to the touch but not scorching the skin. It is more therapeutic than a simple heating pad. Sciatica is a different ball game, but it way relieve some pain. Get well Doniker.

Try using the crapper when you have the adult's version of diaper rash. I got that once after sweating up my ass crack on a long, hot road trip. It hurts to put your pants on, take them off, take a shit, pee, and wiping is a nightmare! Sitting hurts. Standing hurts. Laying in bed is hell! Everything you do makes your ass feel like a flaming coal pit!

I found Depends is a big help.
No rush, no fuss.

I am not alone.....WOW (I hate exclamation marks, so pretend they're here). I'm 25 next week and I just got these sharp pains a few days ago. my mom told me it was sciatica (she knows everything and I don't know how). it took me 5 entire real minutes to walk 40 feet to go smoke a cigarette (which of course helps me poo ooh ooh). I hate this (insert exclamation point). sitting is ok but walking sucks duck terds. I'm going to take all your advice and get a headpad, advil, and stretch like gumby. Thanks ya'll. oh by the way, I'm a man and I wipe like a bitch from the front. maybe cause I'm 50 lbs heavier than I was in high school

I have had lower back problems for years it went down my ass and into my leg and down into my right foot .I have no feeling in my foot because I let that fucking pain in my ass go for to long now I just had back decompression surgery and I feel no change what bull shit another way for some fuck to take my money.And now they say therapy ok another way to fuck me .I guess its all bull shit and I am just screwed or maybe if I put some money up my ass some doctor will climb up and tell me how to fix my problem.Thats realy all they give a shit about is cash. Thanks for nothing dick head surgens you suck.

Go see a chiropractor ( a good one ), walk in in pain walk out pain free, bests sciatica treatment there is.

my advice is to try lying with your crotch on the bed, and your knee's supporting your torso on the ground.
in theory, it would take pressure off of your lower back and hips. so it may or may not help. but is worth a try.

you could also try taking inkgo biloba for circulation. it might reduce any inflammation.

ginkgo biloba has many other health benefits. such as improves memory and mental acuity.
i've been using it for circulation related problems that have resulted in the loss of vision in one eye, and a threat to vision in the other eye.

i can literally say with all certainty, that i can see the results of ginkgo biloba.....

Thanks the music i listen to (bands like Impaled, Mortician, Obituary, Cannibal corpse and so on. I know alot about human anatomy and stuff, but i dont know what the hell is wrong. Gah its annoying like sometimes, after i take a shower ill walk like 10 feet out of my bathroom and just have to drop to my knees and roll around in pain its the worst pain you could ever feel honest to god and im rolling around thinking im going to fucking go grab one of my dads guns and shoot myself it hurts that bad its like in my lower stomach/crotch area. And also sometimes like just now i take a crap and like it will hurt in my anal passage, and my bladder and in my heart and my abdominal aera. Does anyone know what wrong? Please help my s.n for aim is rodh347, and my myspace is www.myspace.com/stonesourstehshit

Cripes, I'm 45 and have lived with sciatica since I was 27 and had discs removed. But I have learned to be patient with the pain; it always goes away.
However, taking a morning dump when I am still miserably stiff from getting out of bed is agony. I don't bother to wipe, it is so painful. Instead, I hop right into the shower. The warm water simultaneously soothes my back and cleanses my ass, and without the wear and tear of toilet paper.

I don't have sciatica, but I did have two surgeries for kidney and bladder stones [pain!], after which I needed a Foley catheter. Trying to poop while wearing that contraption is no fun, especially while constipated by Percocet. I went through a lot, including pooping while almost standing up, but not nearly what Doniker and other contributors here did. Be thankful for normal function when you have it--the replacements are not as nice.

In my early 20's I had a pilonidal cystectomy. My cyst was extensive and required a deep incision from my tail bone to the anus. Shitting while my entire ass was bandaged was an extremely painful and awkward experience. You got it right MSG....be thankful.

Get a yoga ball and lay on it backwards...rock back and forth you can feel your back relieving the stress...