"Some passengers found the ordeal of returning home for Chinese New Year so horrific last year that they jumped out of the train carriages, according to the China Daily."

There are 2,000 people in a 1,000 capacity train and they're all wearing diapers. The stench would drive me to jump off the train too.

Man, that is nasty. I had a relative that visited China back in the late seventies and she said the highway they were on was being built by labourers with nothing more than shovels, wheelbarrows, hoes and rakes and that the workers would relieve themselves and shovel it over onto the road base and cover it up. Gives a whole new meaning to the term "pothole".

The Southern equivalent to the above-described rite of passage is taking a pee off the back porch, especially if it is after 5 or 6 cold ones and you do it with one or more of your buddies and keep tabs on whose stream travels the farthest/longest. If your old lady joins you, now that's REALLY special!

Makes me think of the "Oops, I Crapped My Pants" commercial parody on SNL

I woulde't mid just shitting where i was and let someone step in it. Or piss on the dude in front of me.

IF i were a woman it would be even easier. Dont wear any panties and just piss under you.

You wouldn't mind shitting on your feet and forcing other people to step in it? That's turd terrorism.
Shame on you, KOC, shame on you.

:)

Shitting on my feet? No, you bend over a bit so that crap goes out at 45 degree angle to ground.

I play paintball-CTF occasionally and for my base I use this drainage box in the middle of a dry pond. (A pond that only fills when it rains-all the storm drains dump off there)

The box is like a pill box-hole all the way across at eye level, 1 hole at bottom, and mesh-grate at top. There is a 5-ft diameter pipe going out the back that the water from all the storm drains runs into after going thru the pill box (which is only wet when it rains) Often during a long battle I will go back into the pipe and pinch a loaf. You kinda sit in a chair only the chairs not there, bend forward at waist (So ass is in the air) and blow crap all over walls. Actually pretty good, cannot clog it up, no cold toilet seat.

KOC! That's horrible!

Wow! Thanks for those helpful step-by-step instructions. But I just don't know about the skirt thing. You'd have to hike it pretty high, wouldn't you, to keep it clean? And the poop part MIGHT work, but how do you keep the pee from splashing your shoes? And how to balance while holding the skirt out of the way? Logistics! I need logistics!

GottaGoGirl, KeepOnCrappin is a very big GUY, who I might add is known for his prodigious intake KFC and other fried wonders. So it might be better if you asked one of our lady posters what their methods might be. Try our forums, look on the left of the page, just register and post a query and I'm sure you'll get a quick response.

Look for posts written by The Shit Volcano. I recall her mentioning she had mastered the act of urinating while standing.

Sorry, meant to say ART of urinating while standing... and I can't imagine that was an easy feat for her.

Don't think I'll be trying anytime soon. :)

Aww, cmon FP, just go for the sex change so you can tell us what its like.

Bunga, how is it that you know I am a very big guy? Its not like I said that im fat anywhere.

You did say, in your KOC at KFC story, that you're a big guy.

Sex change? No thanks. Quite happy being a woman, thank you very much.

Thanks, Bunga; KOC mentioned the skirt prospect, though, and I was trying to be funny. Obviously, I failed. (*Sighs sadly and shuffles from room*)

GOG, I thought it was funny. Bunga is compensating for something. Go look at the posts under his story, "Regret."

I see, FP.

Wow, bunga compensating????

Chinese Poo year. Har!

SamDamnit!
Rectum Rector
of
The Church of Poop
http://www.myspace.com/saintcarnivean

The year of the dog-doo.

Aww, thanks, Dumpster! I feel better, now. :)