Lately I've noticed fewer SUVs on the road. I'm thrilled, because I hate these Goliaths, primarily for the lethal threat they pose to me should they ever do battle with my Davidesque Honda.
I'd chalked up their dwindling numbers to the recent surge in gas prices. But according to Ford Motor Co, the problem is too much shitting going on. A company memo was sent out on Tuesday at the Wayne, Michigan, plant, which rolls out the Ford Expedition and Lincoln Navigator. According to the memo, many of the 3,500 hourly workers are spending more than their allotted forty-eight minutes per shift in the restrooms, and this is impacting productivity.
To remedy the problem, Ford supervisors will begin collecting data on restroom time and "respond appropriately."
I do wonder how the company knows that workers are spending more than forty-eight minutes in the head if they haven't already been collecting data. I also wonder what they have in mind for an "appropriate" response -- A Corkboard of Shame in the lunchroom, perhaps, with photos of the shoes of frequent flyers?
If it weren't for the fact that this is a plant that builds gas guzzlers, my sympathies would be with management. After all, one hour in the restroom for every seven hours worked does sound excessive. But it seems only fitting that workers who build vehicles that get only fifteen miles per gallon should themselves go only sixty minutes between shits.
