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Teens toss turds into Tim's

Posted 05.01.2006 by The Dumpster
A bizarre act of turd terrorism has resulted in criminal charges against five Canadian teens. According to a recent report from the Canadian Press, five teenagers from Orilla, Ontario, face charges for "mischief over $5,000," "assault with a weapon," and "administering a noxious substance." Their crime? Pulling up to a drive-thru window at a Tim Hortons coffee shop and tossing in a cup full of, well, the stuff that makes this site go 'round.

Add this one to your file on Dumb Criminal Stories; the occupants of the car -- all boys -- were arrested when one of the three female employees on the receiving end of this little stunt recognized the driver because they attend the same high school. Does one sense a thwarted love interest at work here -- something along the lines of "A Bullet Meant for Me"?

The employees, said Constable Laura Kloosterman, "were all humiliated, embarrassed and very upset. They had to clean it up. Uniforms and food went in the garbage."

Bizarrely, however, neither the perps nor the parents of the perps thought there was anything wrong with this act of turd terrorism. "One parent even told me they saw it happen in a movie," Kloosterman said. A scan of this site's authoritative Movie Poop-Scene Database, however, did not reveal the existence of such a scene. In any event, as a defense to such crappy behavior, we think that stinks.

Show some poop support, or make a poop retort.
GottaGoGirl (2615) -- 05.01.2006

Blame Canada.

Fart Poopie (1254) -- 05.01.2006

Oh, they saw it in a movie. That must make it ok...

I know. That people can be so idiotic hurts my head too.

daphne (3522) -- 05.01.2006

Dumpster, I am so sad when I read about these types of parents. Your article is a great example of what not to do as a parent.

As much as Thing One (my oldest) has committed pranks in the past, (he tp'd a house last October), I'd be humiliated if he threw poop in a public establishment. Humiliated. It's "bacteria under the microscope" interesting that someone would be so ignorant as to show no humility for such an act their kids performed.


_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

KeepOnCrappin (550) -- 05.01.2006

Wow. I was brought up with parents that thought everything I did was wrong. Now I'm seeing lots of parents that stand up for their kids no matter what. My parents never belived me. But I was watching Judge Judy on Friday and these kids' mom belived them when they said that they didn't throw rocks at the car, even when the security camera caught them on tape. And now this.

Sometimes I think we need to have parent education in high school, like Driver's ed, ya know?

_______
"KOC -- the Cool Crapper" - Rat Droppings

Fart Poopie (1254) -- 05.01.2006

KOC, they do have a parent education course in high school. It's not one that would help in this situation, but, when I was in high school we had to learn how to take care of babies. They made us carry around dolls with sensors.
They also had a more comprehensive class for those girls that were pregnant but didn't want to leave school during their pregnancy.

I agree with you, though. There's a cliche out there, "You need a license to hunt and a license to drive, yet any idiot can have kids."
As awful as it sounds, there should be some kind of restriction, especially in this age of brain dead morons and lack of common sense.

PooperGal (527) -- 05.02.2006

You can't teach a person how to be a responsible parent in school. It has to come early, very early, and from role models outside of school, like AT HOME, for instance.


_______
PooperGal
"Searching for the Origin of the Feces"

Fart Poopie (1254) -- 05.02.2006

The only problem with that, PooperGal, is that there are a lot of very nice, very intelligent and good parents out there that have stupid kids. Then those stupid kids have their own kids and become stupid parents.

You can't blame all parents all the time, and it doesn't hurt to have some reinforcement of good things learned at home in school.

Fart Poopie (1254) -- 05.02.2006

Sorry, I'm losing it. lol

That should say, "it doesn't hurt to have some reinforcement of good things TAUGHT at home in school."

It's only reinforcement if it's actually being taught at home, which we all know isn't always the case. That's why we end up hearing about the stupid people in the news.

PooperGal (527) -- 05.02.2006

I agree, FP. Good point. And I strongly believe that the bulk of things should be taught at home...and reinforced in school.


_______
PooperGal
"Searching for the Origin of the Feces"

KeepOnCrappin (550) -- 05.02.2006

Sure we can blame the parents! If they didn't reinforce the idea to their kids to use common sense when asking your kid if they did somthing illegal, they we ought to blame the parents. The only reason I can think of is if the kid has some form of mental disease.

I like the alliteration in the title.

_______
"KOC -- the Cool Crapper" - Rat Droppings

The Dumpster (2506) -- 05.02.2006

Dave wrote the title.

Lahey's_shit_hawk (not verified) -- 05.02.2006

They were probably just pissed off that they got nothing but "please play again" on the Roll up the rim to win.

daphne (3522) -- 05.03.2006

You would not believe the parents I've encountered in the Army that refuse to believe their kids do anything wrong. I've seen a parent totally deny that her kid spit on another child after a mother, 4 kids, and I all told her he did so. I think that it's a defensive thing sometimes and arrogance some other times.

I saw the court show you mentioned, KOC, with the videotape. I'm telling you now, you'll meet a few of them if you get married and go suburbs.


_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

Double Flush (597) -- 05.03.2006

Ugh, parents these days. If I ever did something wrong (never something as severe as throwing poop at someone), my dad wouldn't hesitate to grab me and give me a good old-fashioned ass whipping. And I believe that if parents would do that once in a while, we would have less incidents like this.

From the other perspective, how STUPID would you have to be to shit in a cup (or otherwise fill the cup) and throw it at someone who knows who you are!?

Sorry to be so pissy to both the guilty and their parents, but my goodness, does no one even care anymore?


_______
Practicing the ancient Chinese art of double flushing... because sometimes, a single flush just isn't enough.

daphne (3522) -- 05.03.2006

Welcome aboard, Double Flush. I just published some of your comments, and I thought of something when I read this one.

A few months ago, I found an article on the web about a guy who killed or severely beat a puppy, and his punishment was to stand on a corner in his hometown with one of those huge signs on his body that said something like "I abused an animal and was convicted". The picture of the guy was proof that his punishment was fit and just.

Maybe the kids should have had to stand on a corner, each one on his own corner with a sign that said "I threw human excrement at another person". You know, I bet that would have been worse than just about any other public service possible.
_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

Fart Poopie (1254) -- 05.03.2006

KOC, these parents are definitely to blame.

The point I was trying to make is that some parents do everything they can to make sure their kids grow up to be decent people, but their kids are too damn stupid to get it. You can't blame a parent for their kids being stupid if they've done all they can and make it clear that they don't condone the kids' actions.

Daph, I agree with your sign idea, but it should be printed in simple terms so that even young children can see and understand it.

"I threw poop at hard working people." Make them wear that at the busiest entrance to the mall on saturdays for a while.

KeepOnCrappin (550) -- 05.03.2006

How does the kid get to be stupid though? All kids can doo well in school, they only fail if
A) they don't work
or B) they take classes that are too hard.

But then this would be the kids ignoring all the things their parents told them. We've all done that though.

My parents never belived me, so I guess that;s hy I can't understand how these parents belived their kids.

_______
"KOC -- the Cool Crapper" - Rat Droppings

Double Flush (597) -- 05.04.2006

I've seen people get the sign punishment too. They usually have to wear it in a high-traffic area, and they definitely learn their lesson.

_______
Practicing the ancient Chinese art of double flushing... because sometimes, a single flush just isn't enough.

Fart Poopie (1254) -- 05.05.2006

KOC, some people get hit one too many times on the head by their older siblings.
And others, as is the case in this article, have a genetic predisposition. If the parents don't have it, they got the stoopid gene from their uncle Billy Bob. You know, the guy in everyone's family that is a prime candidate for a Darwin Award.

Double Flush (597) -- 05.06.2006

"the guy in everyone's family that is a prime candidate for a Darwin Award." LOL my family is full of em, luckily I came out fine. Still I don't believe anyone would go so low as to throw their own poop at someone (except maybe in a rage when half their trailer is flooded by the 30 year old toilet)

_______
Practicing the ancient Chinese art of double flushing... because sometimes, a single flush just isn't enough.

Lame comment! -1 point
Poopgirl (77) -- 06.25.2006


They threw a coffee cup full of poo into a coffee shop?! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!
Poop on!

-Poopgirl

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