I recently started dating a new guy who had a particular smell to his breath and farts. A few weeks later, I seem to have the exact same-smelling breath, farts and shit. I realize that it's some nefarious bacterial strain playing havoc with my internal flora. How do I get rid of it? (Did I mention that the smell of these farts, breath and shit is ATROCIOUS?!)

Dear Bunghole Sisters,

Frankly, I would get rid of the guy and see if his noxious smells fade after some time passes. No guy is worth putting up with that.

If the smell is lingering and the guy is gone, try using some simethicone chewable tablets such as (Mylanta, Riopan Plus, Mylicon). Charcoal tablets also may help. They're available in natural food stores and many drugstores.

See your doctor if the problem persists.

Thanks for asking Poonurse!

Please be advised that I am only a Poonurse. I am NOT a medical doctor. Any advice I give should be taken moderate skepticism. Please consult a REAL medical doctor if you feel you have a serious medical condition.

-- Poonurse

Poonurse is an RN with 25 years experience in labor and delivery. Her qualifications include seeing a lot of poop, and owning a computer. Also, she works in Michigan, which she calls the asshole of the universe, so that's another bit of credibility. Got a question for her?