Dateline Tuesday, September 11, 2001, 9:30 A.M. The place: the Brooklyn-bound side of the elevated Smith/9th Street F-Train platform -- the highest subway station in the system; a symbol of the city, a shining beacon, a triumph of engineering over gravity.

It's an idyllic day -- smoky over lower Manhattan, but otherwise the sky shines blue and bright. A crowd has gathered on the western-most edge of the platform -- young and old, black and brown and white, this crowd is as New York as it gets. A gathering of innocent men, women and children -- entirely unprepared for the lawlessness and chaos they were to witness.

Readers, take a good, long look at your neighbors, your co-workers, your friends. Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men? Who knows the motivations of the guy living across the hall, or the seemingly innocent passenger sitting on the subway next to you? As this reporter learned on September 11, you never know --- until it's too late.

The incident occurred in broad view of everyone on the platform. The perpetrator, a non-descript, unremarkable man, allegedly decided his own sick personal needs outweighed the collective good of society. In full view of everyone on the platform, he walked behind a trashcan, unzipped his pants, and let loose the chaos.

Not in this town, buster! Even before the last drops of the high-velocity urinary assault on the superstructure of the station had finished flying, NY's Finest pounced. A mixed-sex pair of gumshoes apprehended the perpetrator at the scene of the crime, and immediately commenced writing a ticket.

Caught red-handed, the alleged urinator squirmed in his attempts to provide an alibi, but John and Jane Law were not to be persuaded. Impervious to his weaseling, they wrote the ticket with flourish and gusto, their very actions inspired by the sacred knowledge that no attack on our fair city will go unpunished.

"...in front of children!" chided one of the cops. I wasn't able to hear what the man said in response, for a loud rumble from Manhattan and shrieks from the adults and children in the crowd drowned out what he was saying. However, there's no possible justification that could cut it for THIS reporter: like the officer said, there are some things that children just shouldn't see.

-- Dave [1]

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