peoples of the world divided along two poop dimensions [3] -- 1) Sitters vs. Squatters and 2) Wipers vs. Washers.
The domain of the Squatters roughly follows the sixteenth century boundaries of the Ottoman Empire (as shown on the map). Sitters occupy Western Europe and the land masses to which disgruntled Western Europeans have traditionally fled -- the Americas, Australia, and New Zealand. Squatters occupy the rest.
Mr. Hirata's analysis made me wonder whether the War on Terror is really a war on Squatters -- a war declared by the "Coalition of the Willing" (who are Sitting Wipers), and protested by hold-outs and contrarians, the minority Sitting Washers. If it boils down to this, then one solution to the current mess might be to offer to replumb the entire Islamic world -- thus converting them to Sitters -- while at the same time sending everyone in the Coalition of the Willing a free bidet, converting them to Washers.
Admittedly, the plan is a bit naïve -- which by itself should qualify it for serious consideration. But let me also point out that this plan, too, provides ample opportunity for profiteering by greedy contractors. But the best part of the plan is that even if it didn't work, at least everyone would feel -- and smell -- a whole lot better.
Association. He sees the