Why is it the longer I hold my turds in, the worse they smell and the softer they get?

Dear Honey_Monster,

Thanks for the question!

Your poop is getting even with you for holding it hostage in there. Poop is meant to come out, not linger around in a smelly, dark passageway like that.

Just imagine how you would like it. Poo has feelings, too. Free your poo--don't hold it in.

Please be advised that I am only a Poonurse. I am NOT a medical doctor. Any advice I give should be taken moderate skepticism. Please consult a REAL medical doctor if you feel you have a serious medical condition.

-- Poonurse [1]

Poonurse is an RN with 25 years experience in labor and delivery. Her qualifications include seeing a lot of poop, and owning a computer. Also, she works in Michigan, which she calls the asshole of the universe, so that's another bit of credibility. Got a question [2] for her?