My eleven-year-old son has destroyed countless pairs of underwear because he will not poop when he has to. He will only go at home if we threaten him or tell him he will get ice cream if he goes! He says that he is bored, or he doesn't want to miss his favorite TV show, or Ihe doesn't have to poop everyday!!! His underwear tells me different. His belly is usually hard and sticking out. We have tried to use laxatives and stool softner. When he does poop, it's much too large to come out of my kid! I tell him he will get sick by not pooping. Is this a phase?? Will he really get sick??

Dear Dottie,

An eleven-year-old with the behaviours you describe has problems far worse than just boredom.

Get him to a pediatric gastroenterologist to discuss bowel retraining. Then have him evaluated to see if there is any behavioural techniques a pediatric mental health professional can help you with.

This is not normal behaviour for an eleven-year-old. And you shouldn't be having to get this involved with his stool at this age. Please take him to be seen and get him some help. Good luck, and thanks for asking Poonurse!

Please be advised that I am only a Poonurse. I am NOT a medical doctor. Any advice I give should be taken moderate skepticism. Please consult a REAL medical doctor if you feel you have a serious medical condition.

-- Poonurse [1]

Poonurse is an RN with 25 years experience in labor and delivery. Her qualifications include seeing a lot of poop, and owning a computer. Also, she works in Michigan, which she calls the asshole of the universe, so that's another bit of credibility. Got a question for her [2]?