Hi Dave --
Yes, I really am a colon hydrotherapist [2]. Though I think if I had thought I would be consulted in a professional sense, I might have chosen a more, uh, clinical name. :-)
I am always amazed at what pours out of people. The amount of crap people walk around with and don't even know it is unbelievable. And all too common.
The large intestine is only about five feet long, but it can stretch to hold a LOT of poop. The colon is the garbage dump of the body, and it should work to regularly eliminate the crap that builds up in it. However, due to inadequate water intake, poor diet, sedentary lifestyles, genetics, illness, injury, etc., it doesn't always happen like it should.
Mucus coats the walls of the colon to keep it lubed and to protect against foreign invaders. When poop comes along and gets stuck, the mucus sees it as foreign, and coats it with mucus. More poop comes along and more mucus is added and over and over again. What forms is the famous mucoid fecal plaque [3] that you often see pictures of [4] (Editor's note: eww) in advertisements for colon cleansing. This compromises the colonic muscles so they don't work as well. How well would you work if you had a few pounds of shit and mucus on your head?
Colon hydrotherapy is, in essence, a nice warm bath for the large intestine. Body temperature water flows gently up into the colon via a well-lubed speculum (a tube -- not a gynecological speculum) and a separate waste tube carries off the blessed fecaliths toward oblivion (or the city sewer).
Colon therapy is excellent for clearing up skin conditions -- acne, eczema, psoriasis, etc. -- as well as for gas, bloating, constipation, lower back pain, migraines, PMS symptoms, and more. People who are doing detoxification programs, chelating heavy metals, or doing fasts are advised to get colonics to speed the release of toxins from the body. Colonics also offer emotional cleansing, as the energy of past issues leaves with whatever shit it rode in on. I've had quite a few patients tell me that, to them, colonics are a religious experience.
Without being able to analyze each emission that shoots out of people's bums (and Lord, I wish I could!), the contestants on their way out the anal door include bacteria, viruses, parasites, heavy metals, excess hormones, cholesterol, bile, and bits of unchewed food.
Most people leave feeling more energized, grounded, and/or focused. Some people, especially those with chronic illnesses, find they need to lie down afterwards for a little while. If there is a leaky gut, some of the toxins stirred up by the colonic will enter the bloodstream, and it takes a while for them to get resorbed.
Personally, what I have found is that it alleviates depression, takes care of colds and flus before they attack, and, above all, gives me an incredible sense of joy in the world.
If I can answer any questions, please feel free to ask.